Under Timeless Ice/Transcript

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show

MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (singing and hollering) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Just like that. Before we get into tonight's episode, we do have some announcements to get through, beginning with the first of our two sponsors, Cortex. Sam, if you don't mind.

SAM: This episode is sponsored by Cortex, a brand new gaming toolset from our pals at Fandom, the D&D Beyond folks, that lets you create your own original game from hundreds of modular parts to best suit your world and play style. Using dice and descriptive traits, you can craft and play in all kinds of genres and worlds from books, TV, movies, and video games. Cortex is designed for episodic one shots as well as longer epic story arcs online or in person. To show you how easy it is, I used Cortex to design the most immersive horror game you'll ever experience. I call it Tax Code Carnage: IRS Annihilation, the thrilling and chilling game of adventure and accounting as you and your party delve into the darkness of the federal tax code and file your returns by April 15th before evil audit monsters garnish your soul. (laughter) I'll demonstrate. Oh, wait, I'm rolling too early. Oh no! (laughter) Oh no. I'm making up my own rules of the stupid game and I've already broken my own rules. (laughter) Oh no! A CPA aboleth is trying to shred my form 1040. Time to file an extension. A seven? My deductibles weren't itemized, so much red tape, no problem. I'll cast a 4th-level fixed asset cash flow spell. Nat one, I'm insolvent! (laughter) So my question to you guys is, does it need some more work or can Darrington Press publish this, like, right away?

TRAVIS: I mean, a little more play testing.

LAURA: I think it's great.

ASHLEY: I think it's ready to go.

SAM: Or is it too spooky? Is it too scary?

ASHLEY: It's terrifying, my god.

LIAM: Great commercial read.

SAM: Anyway, right now Fandom is giving away free copies of the main Cortex rule book on Twitter, twitter.com/cortexrpg. So head over for a chance to get a copy or simply grab your own digital or physical copy right now at bitly/cortexrpgcr.

LAURA: Woo!

MARISHA: Ey!

SAM: Ey!

MARISHA: Ey!

TRAVIS: Nice job, taxman.

MARISHA: Good game.

LIAM: Physical copy.

SAM: File early! (laughter)

MATT: Awesome. Thank you very much, Sam. And thank you, Fandom friends and Cortex. Our second sponsor for tonight is Hocus Pocus the game. That is a thing that exists, like the OG, awesome Hocus Pocus classic of the era. In the game, players must match the color of the ingredients on the game board to stun the Sanderson sister and stop-- sisters-- or stop their sinister plot.

LAURA: There's three of them.

MATT: That's what I said! Well, it's a singular on the page.

TRAVIS: Black flame candle.

MATT: The sisters-- which I knew-- and stop their sinister plot. The game's packaging is designed to look like a spell book to reflect the theme of the original Disney movie. And it makes a wonderful addition to bookshelves. We're going to have to get one for ourselves.

LAURA: I want it!

MARISHA: I had such a crush on Billy.

MATT: Hell, yeah.

LAURA: Me, too!

MATT: It also includes beautiful artwork faithful to the original Disney film, as well as high quality components, like the adorable wooden Binx game piece. Easy to learn and quick to play for two to six players. It's perfect for family game night this fall season. So check it out at bitly/CritRoleHocusPocus for more details.

SAM: Can I just say that I watched that movie for the first time this Halloween season?

MARISHA: Wait, for the first time?

SAM: I had never seen it. It's really good. Sarah Jessica Parker's so good!

LAURA: She's so adorable. We were just talking about this. She was, like, the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my life.

MARISHA: My lucky rat's tail. She's so good! I love her. Why didn't we watch that?

LIAM: With the Looney Tunes humor too she was like--

MATT: I still think she was better in Fight of the Navigator, but anyway. So we have a few other announcements we have here. We are excited to announce our next project with our friends at Dark Horse Comics, the Mighty Nein Origins.

TRAVIS: Let's go, fam! Let's go! (cheering)

MATT: It's a series of hard cover graphic novels that explores the origin story of each member of the Mighty Nein. The first two volumes that are scheduled for release are Jester Lavorre due in June 2021 and Caleb Widogast in July of 2021.

LAURA: Oh my goodness!

MATT: They're both available for pre-order now at your local game shops and other book retailers. And they're fantastic. We can't wait to be able to announce the creative team helping put this together. And to learn more about the creative team I'm talking about, go check out our announcement article at critrole.com. Marisha, you got an announcement as well.

MARISHA: Oh, I do! I should really read these before we get started.

TRAVIS: Professionals!

MARISHA: Oh, man. Oh, yeah we're back for another episode of Narrative Telephone Round Two this Tuesday, November 17th at 4:00 PM Pacific and our storyteller is the one and the only Brian W. Foster. Buckle up for this one.

LAURA: The cabbage man.

MARISHA: Buckle up, it's special.

MATT: Yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: That's a good word.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Definitely. Thank you, Marisha.

MARISHA: Don't watch, it's-- I'd say not safe for work. Not that any of us are at work, but not safe for work.

MATT: Brian definitely kicked us down that alleyway. Thank you, Marisha. Thank you... Brian. And Laura, you have an announcement.

LAURA: Oh, I do! So you guys know our Vox Machina d20 set that we released before, but I'm excited to let you know that we're doing full sets of dice. So right now we have available a Vex set, a Grog set, and a Vax set. They're in the store. These are the pretty, like, leather bags that they come in. They're lined all beautifully. They're so lovely.

LIAM: They are beautiful.

LAURA: Yeah, I love them. They're with our friends at Diehard Dice. So yeah, go check them out.

LIAM: Good looking set of dice.

TRAVIS: Natural 20.

LAURA: No, shut up!

MATT: Right out of the gate.

TRAVIS: The mug came up.

LAURA: Oh, I got a n-n-nineteen on mine.

SAM: What the--

ASHLEY: Oh, I got a natural 20 on the Vax one!

TRAVIS: These are weighted properly, we swear. They're correctly weighted.

LAURA: They're fancy, I love them.

MATT: You guys better not be using those dice tonight. They're already rolling way too high.

TALIESIN: Ooh, it's got a liner.

MATT: All righty, then thank you so much, Laura.

TRAVIS: Why, what happens tonight, Matt?

MATT: Well, let's find out shortly because... with that I believe we are done with our announcements. Let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

(water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion) ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware because you're about to be dead ♪ ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, ♪ ♪ roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, ahh ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call ♪ ♪ Diggin' deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn (your turn, your turn) ♪ ♪ to roll ♪ (flames whooshing)

Part I

MATT: And welcome back. So, last we left off: the Mighty Nein, making their way north into the realm of Eiselcross, hired by Vess DeRogna of the Cerberus Assembly to help bring her and protect her towards the ruins of Aeor on the region of Foren. Unfortunately, Vess was murdered by, by the previous ally-- or at least the body of the previous ally-- Mollymauk, traveling with other individuals northward on a similar path. You discovered Vess' dead corpse, covered for it, so nobody else would discover it as well, and made your rapid escape from Balenpost along with your scout, Dagen Underthorn, who has been leading you through the icy frigid realm towards the first location on the map which you've decided to explore. Dubbed A5 on the map, it is one of the numerous early excavations of fallen Aeorian debris. And after making your way across some mysterious encounters, some strange weather and making some allies out of possible enemies in the shape of intelligent Yeti, you discovered the outside of this excavation site. As you found a number of long frozen bodies left in the surrounding debris in ice and stone, you begin to approach the entrance to it. And so picking up where we left off as Dagen once more goes, "All right so, got ya here. That's what I'm being paid for. I'll just set up camp out here. And if I see anything strange I'll, I dunno, shout loudly down the hall for you. But stay alive."

TRAVIS: For sure, but also don't feel like you need to just remain outside; if there is trouble you'll come in, won't you?

MATT: "Well, yeah, I mean-- but I'm not going to go super deep in there. I don't know what kind of dangers are in-- to be honest I'm not being paid quite enough for that, so."

TALIESIN: Fair.

SAM: Do we have any sort of communication rock or anything that we can give-- do we-- we don't have anything like that in this campaign do we?

TRAVIS: We just pierce his ear for no reason. Hold still.

LAURA: But I can send him a message.

SAM: Yeah, yeah maybe, maybe like, well, I can send him a message unless we go farther than 150 feet away.

LAURA: Which I think you might, yeah.

SAM: All right, well, I'll send you a message right before we get 150 feet away.

MATT: "Fair, and if things get real dangerous or, I dunno, if you find yourselves being suddenly attacked by a bunch of terrible beasts that are climbing their way to the surface and you're not going to survive, if you could just let me know in advance so I can skedaddle that would be great."

LAURA: I'll try to remember that before I die.

MATT: "I appreciate it. All right then, stay safe. See you on the other side."

SAM: We have a rule in the Mighty Nein. If we don't come back within seven days, you have to hold a funeral for all of us.

MATT: "How elaborate are you thinking?"

SAM: I mean--

TALIESIN: Pretty elaborate I feel like.

SAM: We gave you a thousand gold, right? So at least a thousand gold worth of stuff.

MARISHA: For sure you have to--

MATT: "How about I pay for the funeral out of the extra I was paid when we took this journey. That sound like a plan?"

SAM: That sounds good.

MATT: "Perfect."

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "I'm going to go ahead and cook up a meal. Good luck." He goes ahead and makes his way away from the initial alcove where you guys are currently standing at the precipice of the entrance to find a safer space to set up his small camp out of sight.

TRAVIS: I had See Invisibility up when Mollymauk or Admin Profile or whoever was talking to Jester. That's down now, right? It's been, like, an hour plus, right?

MATT: I'd say it's probably-- because you guys did begin looking through the bodies and stuff and that was-- I'm trying to remember when you did that. I would say yeah. I'd say it's down by now.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LIAM: So... now what?

TRAVIS: I think we agreed we're going to enter? *But**, be open to hearing a story before we kick shit off? Yes?

TALIESIN: I mean, there's no surprise happening here.

LIAM: No.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Is there anything that *we** can do to surprise *them**? Like, they'll expect seven people walking down a hallway. Should we make ourselves look like six or eight? Or should three of us hide or be invisible?

LAURA: I just have this weird feeling because Lucien could see me scrying, he can probably see if one of us is invisible or, you know, if we're disguised or something.

LIAM: So he can see through our usual bullshit.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I feel like those nine eyes will flare up at different moments to activate something. Didn't you say when you scrying an eye lit up and they turned and could see you?

LAURA: I can't remember. Maybe?

SAM: Yes, but two of-- two of you can be, you know, worms or cockroaches. They can't-- they can't see through that, right?

TALIESIN: I think we save our tricks until we know what we need.

TRAVIS: Didn't we do that once before and the cockroach was a little on the (whistles).

LAURA: I was a moth.

TRAVIS: A moth, yeah. And you weren't super with it, right?

LAURA: I don't know what you're talking about.

TRAVIS: A little easily distracted, maybe not just yet.

SAM: All right.

TRAVIS: I think you ate a curtain.

ASHLEY: Wait, what did the stone in the arch say? That had markings? Did we not-- did we figure that out?

LAURA: What stone?

TRAVIS: Oh, I don't think we looked.

MATT: Ah, so as the entrance to this, you can see there once was solid ice that had just sealed it off and has since been worked away. You saw signs of large chunks of ice and rock being chiseled and broken to expose the entrance that leads further down beneath the surface. But it doesn't look like there were any markings, necessarily, or script or writing or glyphs on it. It's just the sign that this was a space that was intentionally dug and excavated to delve within.

ASHLEY: That's what that means. That's what I wrote down. It didn't make any sense.

TRAVIS: Translated it says, "days since last accident."

MATT: I mean, possibly. So, you make your way in?

LAURA: I guess so.

LIAM: I think we are just going in and having a discussion.

LAURA: Is it super duper dark?

MATT: There is no light inside there.

TRAVIS: (laughs) I'll take out the Star Razor and say "*galas-var**" and it'll put out that 20 foot--

MATT: As it ignites the air around with bright divine light, you can see immediately in the first few steps within the entrance, it pincers a little bit and it opens up into a smaller chamber maybe no more than five feet within the interior.

LAURA: I come up right behind Fjord and I go: "*galas-var**!" Does it turn it off?

MATT: No, unfortunately, the wielder has to say the phrase.

LAURA: Too bad.

MATT: That is pretty funny.

TRAVIS: That's very, very clever, though.

LAURA: I was just trying to see.

SAM: I'm going to just power up a bolt with a spell. I'll Voltaic Bolt a spell-- a bolt. Just so it's ready to go.

MATT: Okay, how long does it last?

SAM: It just says until I use it.

MATT: Should be concentration.

SAM: Oh, you're totally right. I don't do that.

MATT and TRAVIS: (laugh)

MARISHA: And how many sets of footprints do we see going into the cave?

MATT: A number of sets. There are fresher ones you can see, but there are older ones that come in and out so you know a lot of people have been through here and who knows how many sets have been wiped out by the weather and then been left behind in recent times. It's a smattering, but there you do see a number of sets that are at least within the last a day or so.

MARISHA: All right.

SAM: Do you want me to scout ahead and check for things? Trappies and stuff?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: And the marching order would be preferred.

SAM: I guess I'll go first.

MATT: Okay.

MATT: Veth up first.

TRAVIS: Walk in the park.

MATT: Who else is coming up after Veth?

TRAVIS: Nobody for at least a hundred feet.

MATT: Okay, so. (laughter)

LAURA: I'll follow Veth.

LIAM: If you're going to message Dagen, now's the time.

SAM: Dagen, we're 150 feet away from you. (laughter)

MATT: All right, so. You, go ahead and roll a stealth check as you enter into darkness. Do you have darkvision?

SAM: I do. My stealth is 25.

MATT: Okay. Halflings have darkvision?

SAM: Who ha?

MATT: Halflings have darkvision?

SAM: Uh--

LAURA: Ooh, that's goblin.

SAM: Let's see here. Racial traits, is that where it would be?

MATT: Yep.

SAM: It doesn't say it in racial traits.

MARISHA and TRAVIS: Uh-oh.

SAM: Do I not have darkvision?

TRAVIS: I think you did.

MARISHA: I think that goblins did.

MATT: Not as a halfling.

SAM: Whoa! I didn't know they made characters that didn't have darkvision. (laughter) But seriously, don't all the characters have darkvision except for humans?

MARISHA: All but two.

MATT: A lot of-- a number of them do, yes. And even darkvision, you still can see in pitch darkness, but it's considered very, very low light. And it's still very limited, so.

SAM: I can't see shit! (laughter)

MARISHA: Do you want to borrow my goggles?

SAM: Sure, do I have to attune to them?

MARISHA: I don't... think... so.

TRAVIS: (laughs) What *do** we know? (laughter)

TALIESIN: How does darkvision even work?

MATT: About 30 feet away on the precipice of an ice cliff Dagen's going, "My god."

MARISHA: It's been a while since this has been relevant.

MATT: "Well, glad I got some pay up front."

LIAM: You guys got something on your mind?

MARISHA: It's not. It's not.

SAM: It's not? I can wear them?

MARISHA: Yeah, you can just put them on. They're just night vision goggles.

SAM: All right, gimme.

MARISHA: Yeah, but I want them back. But I want them back? But I want them back.

SAM: Oh, this is weird.

MARISHA: Will you, will you acknowledge that you're going to give them back?

SAM: Yep, yeah, I got it.

MARISHA: They don't make you-- look straight, They don't make you cross eyed.

SAM: I am looking straight.

TRAVIS: That's the wall Veth, that's the wall.

SAM: This is how I do it. All right, let's go.

MATT: Roll a stealth check.

MARISHA: You might need to go see an optometrist.

LAURA: I'm going to Blessing of the Trickster him-- her.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

TALIESIN: Oh, my god what the hell?

SAM: That is a dainty ring.

TALIESIN: It is, and it should be off.

LAURA: What is happening right now? (laughter)

TRAVIS: Molly!

MARISHA: Pure chaos.

MATT: All right Blessing of the Trickster means you have advantage on your stealth check, which you would have already. But now you're blessed by the Trickster, so there you go.

LAURA: Oh, wow nevermind.

SAM: So roll again?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Sure.

SAM: Slightly better than before, 29.

MATT: 29, okay. So as you vanish into shadow, all of you wait for a moment. You make your way inside where it begins to open up slightly. It kind of-- you enter a sort of kidney-shaped slightly curved antechamber of natural rock and ice. It's about 15 feet wide maybe 25, 30 feet long and-- make a perception check for me.

SAM: Well, those are my specialty. Twelve.

MATT: Twelve. What you do see within this room, are signs of an abandoned encampment. Small, but you can see there is an old frayed rope that is partially coiled in the ground and discarded at the side. You see heavy tools that have been-- like pickaxes and elements that are used for simple excavation. You see a pile of rags and burlap, sacks and stuff. Two different black soot-marked fire pits in here that currently are just in disuse. But it looks like this was a resting place or a temporary encampment or a rotating encampment for those who are coming to excavate this location. And then the chamber continues on. You can see it goes deeper and deeper and becomes a steady decline into darkness below. And it pincers into about a wide enough space for single file travel.

SAM: And everyone else is like 30 feet behind me?

MATT: Yeah, they're still at the entrance. So they're about 20, 30 feet.

SAM: Let me just go and look and see how-- if those fire pits or whatever are recently used.

MATT: All right, make an investigation check for me.

SAM: 23.

MATT: 23, looking at the fire pits, one of them looks like it hasn't been used in a while. One of them looks like the recent ash and soot in there puts it somewhere neighborhood for the past week or so. It could be a day ago. It could be a few days ago, but it's relatively recent.

SAM: Okay, I'll take some soot from there and just do this, get ready for battle, you know?

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.

SAM: And I'll just message back to the friends. Okay, first room's clear, nothing here. I'm going to keep going down, but come, come up and then I'll go down. I don't know how to-- go! (laughter)

TRAVIS: What was that? Of all the movies you've seen, did you ever see? That was like do re mi shit in choir.

SAM: Okay, let's go. That's what the SWAT teams do.

MARISHA: That was the cutest thing I've ever seen.

TRAVIS: OSD is no longer going to take our support.

TRAVIS: Stop, ♪ la. ♪

SAM: Serpentine, serpentine.

TRAVIS: ♪ Ti, do. ♪

SAM: All right, I'll continue down.

MATT: Okay, you all still staying outside?

LAURA: No, we're following 30 feet behind.

MATT: Okay, so you follow in after Veth and you, too, see this small encampment here with the scattered elements and piles of disused tools and rags and things that lead you to believe that people stayed here at some point. And the tunnel continues on beyond that in a very thin, maybe six foot tall, two and a half foot wide opening that itself looks partially broken into the ice and rock. Like, it may be at once point-- at one point itself was just sealed, solid ice.

MARISHA: Can I check to see if there's any markings on the walls? Any codes, anything utilizing my cant?

MATT: Make a perception check.

MARISHA: My thieves' cant background? Perception? No, not good, eight.

MATT: Eight?

MARISHA: That wouldn't be an investigation?

MATT: Well, either way, either way you don't see any markings, you don't see any writing, you don't see any symbols. It looks like this is just simple bare rock and ice.

MARISHA: Okay, so nothing directing miners or anything like that, or any of excavation--

MATT: No.

LIAM: Miners or minors?

MARISHA: That's-- miners.

TRAVIS: One second.

TALIESIN: Minor miners. Minor minor miners.

TRAVIS: Can I go up and just put hands on the wall? Just drag fingers across it and just make sure it's actually real?

MATT: Yeah, so you work around one side and drag your fingers through and as it does, you hear the grinding of ice crystals and then, occasionally, the slick elements of smoother ice, stone. It's all solid, cold to the fingertips, but thankfully you have gloves.

LIAM: Before Veth takes off, I apparate Frumpkin and scooch Frumpkin into the hood of your cloak so that he crawls in a bit like a mink stole.

SAM: It's warm.

LAURA: Like Sprinkle.

LIAM: Yeah, a little weightier. A little more healthy.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Can I check the fire pit that has been used to see if there's anything in there other than, you know, ash?

MATT: Sure, make an investigation check.

SAM: Some old insects you can eat?

LAURA: Guidance.

LIAM: Ooh, just in time.

LAURA: You get an extra d4.

ASHLEY: I do?

ASHLEY: This would be-- ooh. Okay, what's my investigation? 15.

MATT: 15. You see within the ashes that remain here, some of it's wood-based burnt carbon, some of it is melted fats. It looks like with a lack of nearby timber, you know, the abundance of timber is not available here. So you would-- you see, there are various different materials that were used to start and maintain a fire. That's what you acquire from that. Beauregard because you have a super high passive investigation, you also glance over while she's looking at the fire pit. The pile of rags and burlap that rests off to the side, you can see some of it looks like long discarded bedroll elements. And you see the edge of a boot under it.

TRAVIS: They left their shoes here.

MARISHA: (laughing) Does this-- take your shoes off before we go any further. Does this look shaped, you know, like there's a body that goes with that boot?

MATT: It's a large enough pile where a body could fit under it, but...

MARISHA: All right. I'm just going to look at it fast and go towards the pile of clothes.

SAM: You mean you're going or do you want me to?

MARISHA: I don't know. I'm just following.

SAM: I'm going!

MARISHA: I don't know your language.

SAM: I'm going to go there, too. (laughter)

MARISHA: And then we go. But before I pull anything off, can I poke with my staff?

MATT: Sure. You poke the boot and the boot shifts when you poke it.

MARISHA: Did you see that, did you see that, did you fucking see that?

MATT: Not on its own.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: But when you push it, you push it. It gives.

MARISHA: I'm going to poke the--

SAM: The bear.

MARISHA: The bear. I want to poke the mound.

MATT: Okay. (low impact sounds) No reaction.

TRAVIS: Uncover that shit.

LAURA: Just look and see what it is.

MARISHA: You think he's dead?

TRAVIS: Is that another military hand sign for...?

SAM: Yeah. Two. Body.

LIAM: Doggy paddle, doggy paddle.

SAM: Doggy paddle. (laughter)

TRAVIS: General sense of tension here.

MATT: Pulling back the scattered elements of forgotten and tossed aside material, you uncover indeed a frozen corpse.

MARISHA: Oh, it's frozen.

MATT: It appears to be a rather tough-looking drow in heavy leather armor. His face aghast in terror with trails of frozen blood against his face, heading from his eyes, his ears, his nose, his mouth.

SAM: Do we recognize him?

MATT: You do not recognize this individual specifically, no.

TRAVIS: Dynasty-type attire?

MATT: Indeed. The blade by his side and the armor he's wearing does bear distinctly Kryn dynasty design.

LAURA: Can I do a medicine check to see if-- I mean, obviously, this has to be within the last-- if it's in the last week or if maybe this is much older?

MATT: Make a medicine check for me.

LAURA: Guide-- oh, I didn't say it beforehand. Gui-- 24.

MATT: Twenty four?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yes, in fact, this body, the elements of it that are currently cold are beginning to freeze over, let you know that this was probably within the past few days.

MARISHA: Oh, can I inspect the body? Any special markings? Any eyeball tattoos?

MATT: Sure, make an investigation check.

SAM: Eyeball tattoos?

LIAM: I'm going to kneel down next to her with small flames in each hand and bring it close enough to start--

MATT: Thawing?

LAURA: Guidance!

MARISHA: Thank you. This is an investigation check, you said?

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: Fucking shit. Okay, 18.

MATT: 18. So looking at the-- there are no distinct wounds on the body. Between both of your checks, it looks like the trauma was internal. And the wounds, or at least the pattern of bleeding is identical to how you found Vess DeRogna, but you do not see any, eye-like markings on the body. Nothing akin to what you found on hers.

LAURA: When we-- I can't remember when we were in the chamber with Avocado and we got the vision, did our ears bleed? Did our nose bleed with that? Or like, or was it just a bad vision?

MATT: It was just a bad vision.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: The sword next to his body, plain-looking? I mean, not plain. It's obviously a Kryn sword.

MATT: I mean, it's well made, you know.

TRAVIS: I'll take it and I'll put it in the Bag of Holding.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Searching through his clothes, pockets any notes? Any messages, any ordinances?

MATT: The blade left behind remains, everything else on the body has been taken.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Can we talk to it?

TALIESIN: I don't have that today. I didn't think it would-- I thought we would have trouble today. So I packed for trouble.

LAURA: That's totally fine. Should we take his head?

TALIESIN: I mean, it couldn't hurt.

LIAM: Pull that back out, please.

TRAVIS: The sword?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Take out my axe. Is this fucked up?

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: What are you doing, what are you doing?!

MATT: You watch as Jester cleaves the head from the drow corpse. It rolls about three or four feet before coming to rest at your feet.

TRAVIS: Why did you do that?

SAM: Is this a thing that we do now? We desecrate the body?

LAURA: No, it's just so Caduceus can talk to him later!

TRAVIS: Oh, just clue us in first.

TALIESIN: Well, we were talking, I assumed everyone was listening.

TRAVIS: I thought you snapped and we were going to have to turn on you now.

TALIESIN: Hold on. Casting Decompose on everything but the head, just to get it going. Whatever the hell is going to grow out here.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Caleb, do something with this sword. What did you want?

LIAM: Well, he's holding two flames and I shake one out and then I cast Detect Magic on the sword.

MATT: Okay, the sword itself is inert. It is a mundane weapon. It is well-made, but it is a normal weapon.

TALIESIN: That does the full radius, though, to the--

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: Anything else around that's glowing?

MATT: Nothing else that catches your attention.

TRAVIS: What about the head that's on my toe?

MATT: Not magical, but a little ghastly.

TALIESIN: It's frozen, it'll keep.

LAURA: Just take it and put it in the bag or something.

TRAVIS: Don't we have a bag of colding?

LAURA: No, that was another person.

LIAM: *Ja, ja ja**.

TRAVIS: You do?

LIAM: Well, this.

TRAVIS: Oh, it's okay.

SAM: Wait, what is that? That's not the thing that shattered? That's a new thing?`

LIAM: It's a new piece.

LAURA: You can put multiple bodies in it?

TRAVIS: Takes a minute, doesn't it?

LAURA: I mean, it can just be the corpse holder, you know?

TRAVIS: I just toss him the head.

LIAM: I put the flames out.

TALIESIN: No, no, no, we need that.

LIAM: Not in time. After catching it. Okay, I need a moment. So I need 10 minutes to put this on ice. (like Mr. Freeze) Ice, everybody freeze. I'll put down--

SAM: I'll go scout ahead while you take your 10 minutes. So, you know.

TALIESIN: I'm going to, before you head off I'm just going to really quickly give you some Resistance just in case, tap.

SAM: Oh, thank you.

TALIESIN: Tap Resistance.

SAM: I'm tapped.

MATT: Okay, so you go to scout ahead. Roll a stealth check for me.

LAURA: You've still got, for an hour.

SAM: I always have advantage.

LAURA: I know, but now you've got an extra, extra. Nevermind, I cast Guidance as concentration, doesn't matter anyway.

SAM: 30.

MATT: Okay, so you continue on ahead.

LIAM: 20 minutes.

MATT: You do see through this space, there's a shift in the ice patterns as the tunnel gets smaller and smaller. The ice seems to take on strange shapes around you. The hanging icicles bending at odd angles, and it almost appears organic at a flash from time to time giving you the faint sensation like you're stepping deeper and deeper into some massive creature's gullet. It makes you feel a little anxious and nervous. And as the tunnel tightens and tightens, you reach that point rather rapidly where only one person at a time could pass through. You curve around and follow it down at the steady decline. At some points, it's slippery and you have to put your hands up to keep yourself going and not begin to slide downward. The slick ice here will continue to be an issue depending on the steepness of the area ahead of you. But as you continue forward and forward down for a good hundred or so feet, it comes to a wall. It ends at just a stone wall--

SAM: A sheer wall?

MATT: A sheer wall, where you can see there is a crack at the base of it, a little bit to the left. There is a large, heavy crack in the stone that heads from floor to ceiling and where it meets the edge corner of that stone wall to the floor. There was an opening where a person could probably squeeze through

SAM: Oh, it's that big.

MATT: Squeeze through very uncomfortably. We're talking, like, like The Descent, you know. Having to squeeze through. And you don't quite know how far in it goes.

TRAVIS: Underground, too? (unhappy) Mm-mm.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: I scritch Frumpkin and say: Wow, this would be a good job for you, but I can't command you, so. I guess, go!

MATT: (hissing)

SAM: Shoo, go, go in the hole.

MATT: (unhappy cat chittering)

SAM: Go in the hole, go!

MATT: Make an animal handling check.

LIAM: (yowling)

SAM: Eight.

MATT: Eight? Frumpkin runs through your legs and heads back to the rest of the group. (chittering snarls)

SAM: All right, all right.

LIAM: (yowling)

MARISHA: I think Frumpkin has rabies. (laughter)

LAURA: (drawn-out yowling)

SAM: I'll peek through the crack and see if I can see anything. First, I'll check it for traps. I'll check that crack for traps.

MATT: Got it.

ASHLEY: Oh, long Johnson. (laughter)

LAURA and TRAVIS: Oh don piano.

SAM: 23 for traps.

MATT: Why my eyes-- yeah. Sorry.

MARISHA: Oh, internet.

MATT: Oh, classic internet. All right, but now Frumpkin is waiting. Didn't go completely back, but is now just waiting at the edge and letting you do your thing. Looking around the entrance here, you rolled a 15, you said?

SAM: For traps, 23.

MATT: Rolled a 23 for traps. No traps visible around this.

SAM: Then I'll peek my head through the crack and see if I can see anything.

MATT: Okay, you glance through and the stone opening seems to progress for about five or six more feet. And then you just see darkness beyond that.

TRAVIS: No, problem. Not a fall at all.

SAM: I will take a piece of wire and send a Message back. I know that Caleb is otherwise occupied right now, so I will send a message to Caduceus. Mr. Clay?

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah?

SAM: There's there's a void. There's a crack and a hole and a void that keeps going for forever.

TALIESIN: One after another or all together at once?

SAM: What? Oh, hold on. What?

TALIESIN: What?

TRAVIS: Oh no.

MARISHA: (laughing) Caduceus doesn't know how answering machines work.

SAM: Hi. Hi, it's me again.

TALIESIN: Oh, hey.

SAM: I can only hear-- (laughter)

SAM: Hi. I can only hear you after I'm done talking and then that's it. You get to say one thing, so say it now.

TALIESIN: Now.

SAM: Okay, great. So there's a void. Should I keep going or should I wait for you. Now talk.

TALIESIN: I would wait if there's a void. Void sounds like a lot. You should wait.

LAURA: What?

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: What's going on?

LIAM: ♪ There's a void, in the crack, in the wall at the bottom of the sea ♪

TALIESIN: Trying to remember, it was a very confusing message. Oh, there's a void and a crack and a tunnel. Veth didn't say if there was all together or one at a time, but it's up ahead and I told her to wait.

LAURA: Oh, that's probably pretty smart.

TALIESIN: Yeah, it seems like the thing to do.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: So what's the marching order here?

TRAVIS: To meet up with Veth?

LAURA: Yes.

TRAVIS: Oh, right, we're going down the slippery shit.

MATT: Yep, one at a time.

LAURA: I'll go.

MATT: All right, so Jester's up first. Who's after Jester?

MARISHA: Do we have light?

TRAVIS: I'll go after Jester.

LIAM: I can have lights.

MATT: Who's after Fjord?

ASHLEY: I'll go after Fjord.

LIAM: It's pitch black down here, *ja**?

MATT: All right, Yasha after Fjord?

TALIESIN: I'll go after Yasha. I'll turn on a light, too.

MATT: Then Beau and Caleb, who's last?

LIAM: I will not go last.

MARISHA: I'll go last.

LIAM: Yes, you will.

MATT: All righty. So. Pardon me.

TALIESIN: Do we want to rope this, by the way, or no?

MATT: As you all carefully make your way down the tunnel, which is a little tighter for the rest of you in comparison to Veth's first go, but you use the walls and you can find little finger holds to get yourself through. Occasionally, one of the icicle handholds snaps off and you have to drop it. Elements are fragile, some elements are actual stone and well solidified in the environment. But nevertheless, it's a little disconcerting. The variations of the topography. Frumpkin is still waiting back from Veth and you can see Frumpkin's acting a little strange. This is like (yowling, growling) Hair's standing up a little bit.

LIAM: I see this now?

MATT: Yeah, as you enter the room.

LIAM: Well, I ask him: Here, what is the matter? What has got you on edge?

MATT: You get the sense that Frumpkin just senses strange magical energies, and it's making him uncomfortable.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

LIAM: Okay, go with her. Go with Veth, go.

MATT: (meows) Trots up next to Veth. So you are all now at the end of this tunnel, after making your way down the curved and descending slope. Veth, you watch as they all approach, and you see Veth now there at the cracking opening at the bottom of this large wall, and just sitting there looking back at you all.

LAURA: What's the plan?

SAM: I mean, I don't want to volunteer anyone's pet, but it seems like this is a job for a pet.

TRAVIS: What can you see?

SAM: There's this crack and through it about six feet later, there's nothing. It could be a fall, could be gateway to the Abyss. It could be just very dark.

LAURA: Caleb?

LIAM: *Ja**, okay, okay.

LAURA: Can you send Dancing Lights down the little hole or something so we can see?

LIAM: I could do that. We could do either that, or we could send the cat in first to look?

MARISHA: Yeah,

TALIESIN: I can put a Light spell on the cat's tail.

LAURA: Ooh.

LIAM: Well, I really don't feel like we're going to surprise anyone, but perhaps we just let him go take a look.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: Does he have darkvision?

LIAM: A cat? Probably not.

SAM: Cats can see in the dark, that seems--

TRAVIS: Yeah, they're of the devil. They can see in the dark. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Wow, oh yeah.

MARISHA: Don't piss off the internet, Travis.

TRAVIS: (deep voice) This is my domain!

LIAM: "-- rely on smell." Perception check on smell doesn't say one way or the other.

LAURA: I would put light on Frumpkin's tail.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's do Frumpkin light tail.

TALIESIN: (whistling)

MARISHA: 'Cause you can see through Frumpkin, but you can't see through the darkness.

LIAM: Little golden globules float up to the party and the Fey King returns as he enters the crack in the wall.

MATT: All right. As the globs one by one vanish into this small squeezing tunnel, Frumpkin heads on inside. And you're looking through Frumpkin, you said?

LIAM: I was about to, yeah. I put my hand behind me and grab onto Beau's shoulder.

MATT: Okay. Watching Frumpkin slowly curl through this tunnel, it does come to an abrupt end, and there is about a three foot drop into a new chamber. And as the globes slowly begin to drift outward like faintly glowing balloons that illuminate the immediate vicinity, you see a new chamber. Here you emerge-- well, actually you wouldn't know that because it's just Frumpkin. Shards of broken stone litter the floor in front of you. You can see smooth shapes that are left jagged and broken, things have either impacted or just been completely broken, thrown asunder across the floor here. You can see now the floor has unique intricately carved decorative patterns that resemble simple geometric fractals. But it is a very, very large chamber. Just from what little bit of light you have here in the vicinity. You do not see any other walls immediately. You'd probably have to send the light out further and continue to explore. But as Frumpkin steps down and looks around, you don't see a ceiling yet. You don't see a wall to either side. It's just this weird broken stone surface before you

LAURA: Does it looks safe, Caleb?

LIAM: It's very big in here and there's stones everywhere. I need more of a look around. I don't think Frumpkin's too far away. I tell him telepathically to hook to the left and start going along the perimeter.

TALIESIN: Probably get the ropes out.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Is there a big drop? Or was it--

LIAM: No, he jumped down three or four feet.

MATT: Yeah, just a little drop. As Frumpkin curves around the left side of the chamber roughly 15 or so feet later comes to a corner and you could see there is a-- looks to be another wall, though it is a little smoother and the designs are different and a little more disparate in comparison to the floor. And also looking to the left, the same pattern that's on the floor is on the wall behind Frumpkin. The wall where you pass through and out of. Heading along that side, Frumpkin heads on for about 50 or so feet walking the perimeter. You can now see similar design, similar patterns, but the broken bits of stone also now throw in elements of shattered furniture. You can see stone sculptures that themselves are in seven, eight different pieces. And then hundreds of small bits just thrown around in the vicinity.

LIAM: Before you go any further, do the patterns mean anything to me? Are they at all resembling dunamantic patterns or anything?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

LIAM: Natural 20.

MATT: Okay. The patterns, you gather nothing dunamantic about them. There are elements to them that remind you of simple, rudimentary glyphs. We're talking beginning of school when you're first learning to write, copy and understand spellcraft. But these are not functional. They're artistic interpretations. They are-- they are implicitly made to be decorative.

LIAM: But related to--?

MATT: Related to.

LIAM: Arcane glyphs, so--

MATT: Like if you were to see the letter M, but there was so much unique scrolling and design work around the M that it just becomes this beautiful piece of art that is based on an M.

LIAM: There is a decoration inside that is meant to emulate and embellish and revere the arcane.

TALIESIN: That worries me, but okay.

MARISHA: I mean, that tracks.

LAURA: I mean, it's a magic city. Can we go, is it safe? Should we go?

LIAM: I will send him further.

MATT: All right. Make a perception check with him.

LIAM: One.

MARISHA: Sometimes it's just about expression and storytelling.

TALIESIN: Why not use paint?

MATT: Continuing on for another 50 or 60 feet comes to another corner.

LIAM: What shape are we talking about?

MATT: So you're entering, and there was a wall behind--

LIAM: So flat?

MATT: -- and a floor; flat.

LIAM: Flat, okay.

MATT: And then eventually there was a corner here in which the surface area changed. But the wall here and the floor is the same pattern. And then the corner hits here and there's another edge to it. You can now see the opposite wall about 60 or so feet beyond where you first came into the chamber and there, the floor pattern continues again on this side.

LIAM: Okay. Looking for other passages out of here, doors.

MATT: Indeed. Frumpkin goes around, seeing nothing.

LIAM: Nothing, yeah. I think we're going to have to go in. I don't see anything immediately. It looks like ruins, old ruins.

LAURA: Can we fit through the crack or is it?

MATT: You can, very uncomfortably, but it's doable.

MARISHA: Does there look like any sign that Molly & Co. have been through here? If this is the direction that they went?

MATT: You can check the ground, if you'd like to. Investigation or perception, your choice.

MARISHA: Why not? Not rolling great at all tonight. 19.

MATT: 19, still pretty decent. Unfortunately, you don't see anything that specifically says Molly's crew or Molly, but you do see a number of footprints going in and out, some of different ages. Some that might've been your group's at this point since you've all been in here waiting. Just can't quite see anything that definitively tells you that.

MARISHA: Cool. All right.

TALIESIN: I say we run a rope.

SAM: Run a rope?

TALIESIN: And you go first, put a little weight on it so that if somebody gets stuck, they can pull their way through.

LAURA: Oh, smart.

TALIESIN: And then the last person will just take it with them.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Sure, who's got rope?

LAURA: Fjord?

SAM: Give me a rope.

TRAVIS: (tossing)

SAM: Ugh! (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's 50 feet of rope.

SAM: It's very heavy. 50 feet of rope is, like, 100 pounds.

TRAVIS: It's like one and a half, but yeah, sure, okay. (laughter) Nah, it's heavy. You're right, I'm sorry.

TALIESIN: Really, it's too much to add to this conversation.

SAM: All right, I will defy everyone's advice and I will turn invisible.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: And carry the rope in.

MATT: All right. So you squeeze through, and for you-- for Veth you can get onto your hands and knees and make your way through without much of an issue, holding the rope as you go invisible. The ones that'll have the biggest issue getting in here will be probably Yasha and Caduceus. And even Fjord, to an extent. It's not a huge challenge, but it does make you feel a little claustrophobic in having to push through this six, seven-foot period where you are having to exhale at certain points to force your body through the next few inches. But one by one, with the rope's aid, you all eventually make your way into this chamber.

TRAVIS: Just getting vague flashbacks to when someone followed us into a place and let us open a thing--

MARISHA: Uh-huh, and we did all of the work for them? Absolutely.

ASHLEY: Can we make this bigger? You know what I mean? It's like if they already made an entrance they should carve out a bigger.

TRAVIS: I agree.

ASHLEY: This is stupid.

TRAVIS: Lazy.

TALIESIN: Is there any way we can put an alarm or something on this so we know if someone--

LIAM: Sure, we could do that. But I send the four globules spiraling slowly up into the room and I want to get a better picture of the room we're in.

MATT: Go ahead and make a perception check for me.

LIAM: Ay yi yi yi. 20.

MATT: Okay, so. You can now see that fractal pattern that you recognize along the floor, the wall behind you, the wall on the opposite end and now the ceiling above you, it continues. And the more disparate pattern and marble-like texture is on the wall to left and the wall to the right. You do see two different openings that exit this chamber. On the opposite wall and it's fit against the far right side and it's coming out at an angle. Just an opening. And then on the ceiling, you see another similar arched opening that is affixed to where the ceiling and the far right wall meet.

SAM: Does it look like we are in a room that's been turned on its side?

MATT: That's exactly what it looks like. You also see, on the far right wall, there is a large stone circular structure that looks like it's splintered and broken and numerous pieces of the shattered stonework that you see all across the floor appears to have originated from mostly whatever was once there, whether it be a fountain or an art piece or numerous art pieces. All the things that you see scattered across the floor here that aren't just broken structural pieces of stone and other materials are bits of shale and shattered pottery and elements of wooden furniture that has long either frozen over or left dried and forgotten amongst the rest of the debris. But you do see around the room, beyond just those elements, what you now recognize to be a sideways doorway on the opposite wall. And then one in the ceiling.

LIAM: How high up is that ceiling?

MATT: Roughly 40, 45 feet.

LIAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Can we get any type of idea of what this room once was?

MATT: Make an intelligence check.

SAM: Guidance.

MARISHA: Not-- I'm rolling horribly, nine.

MATT: Nine?

TRAVIS: Nein!

MATT: It's hard to tell. I mean, based on the size of it, it's not incredibly massive, but where it would be, the ceiling would be high. It seems to be well-decorated and there's intricacy to the interior, so. Whatever it was used for, there was definitely a-- it was intentionally aesthetically pleasing.

TALIESIN: What kind of furniture is still left unbroken or recognizable other than a couple chairs?

MATT: It looks like splintered elements of a table or a bench of some kind. There's not a lot of wood. Most of it's stone or clay.

TRAVIS: The two exits in the room, the foot traffic that we've been seeing outside of this room, majority of it heading to either of those two exits?

MATT: You can go ahead and check, if you'd like.

TRAVIS: I'd like to.

MATT: Make an investigation check. And the room is still cold. It's not as cold as the previous entrance and the exterior of this. But the interior of this chamber itself, while you do see an element of ice in some places, it seems to have gotten warmer since you've entered.

TALIESIN: There's a stone table?

TRAVIS: 25 on the foot traffic.

MATT: There are elements of a broken stone table in, like, 17 different pieces.

TALIESIN: I'd like to find a couple of pieces, not touch them, but I want to look to see if they're stained at all or off-color.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I have a hunch.

MATT: Okay, while you're doing that, you rolled a what?

TRAVIS: 25.

MATT: 25. You're hard pressed to find specific footprints since there is no dirt or sediment here, but you see some patterns of movement through the debris where plainly things that should have been left undisturbed had been moved. It's hard to tell exactly which ones have been most recently turned, but there has been traffic to the previous doorway and back. As well as some areas where you can see a lot of the local debris has been broken into smaller pieces from an impact from above. So there's been traffic to both.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: We could just levitate up, right?

SAM: I can levitate up, if you want.

LAURA: With a rope and hook it on and we can all climb up.

SAM: Sure, should we check the one that we can see down here first?

ASHLEY: Can I--

LAURA: That one seems more interesting.

SAM: I agree 100 percent. By the way, I'm over here.

MATT: Nothing stained that you can tell. The stone chunks that you can find have themselves intricate carvings, not quite as intricate as like the walls that you see around here and of a different design. It's more just for aesthetics. Grooves and--

TALIESIN: No, weird stains or anything? No sign that anything weird was used on it?

SAM: Shine a black light on it.

MATT: Not to that degree that you can discover.

ASHLEY: Can I, this is so stupid, but I'm going to go over and does my foot stick to the floor of the wall? Like--

SAM: Like Spider-Man?

ASHLEY: Like, you know, if we maybe-- if we can start walking. Yeah, it's like a--

MATT: So you walk over, put your foot on the wall and then go to lift your other foot. And there's no purchase there. You catch yourself. A good idea, but--

TRAVIS: Yeah, that'd have been gang busters.

TALIESIN: That would have been cool.

TRAVIS: All right, so help me out on the layout of this room. So we're in a room that looks like it was turned on its side.

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: There's a wall behind us, two on--

LAURA: Which is the ceiling. The wall behind us is the ceiling.

MATT: It's a mostly cube-looking chamber on its side. You have an entrance across the way and an entrance above.

TRAVIS: Okay, so one in front of us and one above us.

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: I feel like the one above us is the way out.

TRAVIS: So to the back and to the left and to the right are just flat walls.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: And the doorway that's relatively level with us is sealed or open?

MATT: It's open. They're both not-- they're both archways, on their sides. They're just open. There's no door.

MARISHA: So the one, the upstairs one would theoretically be the one that was going down, maybe, right?

TRAVIS: No, I think it went like this.

MARISHA: It was like this so it would go, I don't know.

MATT: They both would have been level, right? Like, so if this was here and then the room is now like this.

LIAM: So one door is lying down--

LAURA: So it's just a horizontal doorway in front of us.

TRAVIS: The hole that we crawled in from is in the ceiling?

MATT: It's on the wall behind you just a few feet. It wasn't intentionally.

LIAM: I'm walking over to the one that is lying on its side because that's easy, and I'm going to peer into whatever is next.

MATT: Okay, it's about, this one that you see is about 10 feet off the ground. So you would have to climb up a little bit to look through.

TALIESIN: Or send the cat.

SAM: Are you guys talking the floor ceiling or the ceiling floor?

LAURA: I lift Caleb up on my shoulders.

LIAM: All right, I am on top of Jester's shoulders. So walk me over.

LAURA: I'm pushing him up so that he can look through the doorway.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Easy does it.

MATT: All right, so as you both make your way over to the edge, you lock your arms onto the outer rim of this archway and pull yourself and look in. There is no light in the next chamber. If you'd like to move your globules in there as well.

LIAM: Oh, yeah I'll bring the globules-- Oh, I grab hold of Jester's horns.

LAURA: Ow!

LIAM: And bring the globules over.

LAURA: They're more sensitive than you think.

LIAM: Vroom vroom, vroom.

TRAVIS: Moped.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: I take off. (laughter)

TRAVIS: ♪ The leader of the pack ♪ Vroom vroom.

MATT: So looking into this next area. There's a brief hallway that continues on that is broken and shifted. So whatever this chamber you're in right now, it looks like it dislodged and is at a different angle than the next chamber ahead of you.

LIAM: Interesting.

MATT: The next one looks to be mostly righted, but it still begins to go to a decline. It's at an odd angle and downward.

LIAM: Okay, and any doors or archways of any kind along its path?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: Just because of the darkness. That is 25.

MATT: 25, dang.

MATT: All right, looking in, this is a larger chamber. As the globules make their way in, you immediately can see the glittering around you of numerous ice crystals everywhere, the floor, the wall, the ceilings. The temperature is much colder in this room. And you can see along all surfaces it is just a coating of ice. You can see some elements of jagged rising crystal that has just been building up over time. Some small-- actually, the entire ceiling, as you look up itself is covered in icicles. It looks almost like just row after row after row of teeth, as they all ominously make their way down from this high ceiling. Glancing inside, you can see four stone braziers, five feet tall, that sit in the middle of the chamber. And then as it slides down to the very very bottom of the opposite edge, as you will the lights to make their way further in, you can see a set of double doors on the opposite end. A different coloration, but also themselves glittering a little bit from the nearby light with it looks like ice that has coated the vicinity.

LIAM: So, a long, icy path, lots of icicles coming down, four stone braziers in the center and then it keeps slanting down with two sealed double doors.

MATT: Correct. Yes.

LAURA: Do you see footprints, Caleb?

LIAM: Do I see footprints is a great question.

MATT: From your angle here, looking up into the tunnel, you'd have to get closer to really inspect the floor. You don't see anything at this distance.

LIAM: This-- you know, I just wanted to take a peek in here. Maybe we want to figure out-- Fjord, you were poking around underneath the hole in the ceiling?

SAM: The wall door.

LIAM: The wall door? The wall door...

TRAVIS: Which one is that?

LAURA: The one in the...

LIAM: The other one. The one that's not this.

LAURA: That was in the ceiling.

TRAVIS: The one that's 40 feet in the air?

SAM: No! Wait, yes?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: Yes. So we could go in here, but you seemed interested in the one above us. So maybe we want to-

TRAVIS: (laughing) I was just generally interested in the structure of this fucking hamster cage! I'm just trying to get my bearings.

LIAM: Well, I think we should take a peek into both and make our decision after we've peeked into both. So, I relay everything that I just saw. But let's work on the harder to reach.

LAURA: Can you float up, Veth?

SAM: I could. Is that-- yes, I can. Anyone else prefer to?

MARISHA: That would use a spell?

SAM: Yeah, that's okay.

LIAM: I could also use my boots--

SAM: That's what they're for.

LIAM: -- if you don't want to go alone.

LAURA: If you can do that without using a spell slot.

LIAM: Yeah, I can.

LAURA: Yeah, sure!

TALIESIN: Take the rope.

ASHLEY: Take the end of the rope.

LIAM: Yeah, of course. Okay.

MARISHA: Is this a situation--

LAURA: You could just use your boots to lift, okay--

MARISHA: -- where my movement would be useful?

LIAM: I can only do it once a day.

MARISHA: To run up a wall?

LAURA: Okay, okay.

ASHLEY: Oh, I didn't need to do it.

MARISHA: My wall and...

TALIESIN: Technically...

MARISHA: My walls and water?

TALIESIN: Technically, the door would be--

MATT: For your movement?

MARISHA: My unarmored movement that I have as a monk?

MATT: It's-- unfortunately, because the doorway is not flush against the wall, it's flush against the ceiling, you would run up the wall and then have no way of running across the ceiling to get there, the way that gravity and physics work.

MARISHA: Just didn't know if there was a chandelier for me to swing on, you know?

MATT: Not really, unfortunately.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Once there's a rope, though, you can--

MATT: That's true. So what's doing what? Who's doing what?

LIAM: I take the rope from Caduceus, and say, look at me, I'm Yasha! (whoosh) And I use the boots-- the Stormrider Boots to launch myself up through the hole.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: The door.

MATT: How far can it take you?

LIAM: Oh, very far. 90 feet.

MATT: Yeah, so you guys watch as Caleb, like an electric rocket, suddenly just (whooshes) takes off. There's a circle of dust that goes (boof) around the base, clearing out a lot of the shards of nearby rock and shale. Just (whooshes) shoot out from the sides, leaving this little circle of clean floor beneath him. As you rocket upward--

LIAM: Coming through!

MATT: (zooming sound) It's about 40 or so feet up, you go through it and then quickly realize, the next ceiling is shorter. It's only about 25 feet.

LIAM: I'm in control of distance.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: It's not 90 feet, splat.

MATT: Right, no, I know.

LIAM: Okay. That'd be cool.

MATT: I'm letting you know, you realize you haven't-- you realize as you go upward to slow and you would have to arc a little bit so you don't plummet back through the entrance you came with. So, you do so. You land with a bit of a heavy hit, catch yourself on your knees and look within the surrounding chamber around you. It is dark up in here. You wait a moment to go ahead and bring the lights--

MARISHA: Up in here! Up in here! (laughs) Sorry.

LIAM: Up in here! (laughter)

MATT: You are met with a partially collapsed chamber. About 60 or so feet from side to side, and then 30 feet wide across and only about 25 feet above. It looks like what would have been a wall or a ceiling here has collapsed in at an angle, and a majority of this room is under rubble on the opposite side. It would've been larger but now, much of it is just under debris. Large 10, 15, 20-foot slabs of stone are partially broken and over and blocking any sort of other exit on the opposite side of the room. And if you look behind you on the other end, you can see other elements of broken stone and other pieces of furniture, actually more furniture in here than there was in the room you just came from. But also, similarly shattered and sent scattered all across the ground. This room also does contain a similar glitter of just a general sheet of ice over everything. And as you exhale a bit into the low light and your breath clouds around you, you can see there's odd striations in some of the ice in certain edges. And there are a lot of these tall stalagmites that seem to have risen up and gathered from stalactites that are reaching down and haven't quite connected in the middle in certain places, but some of these are extremely long.

LIAM: Have some of them met in the middle?

MATT: I would say maybe two of them, but many have just been-- they haven't found enough moisture at a certain point.

LIAM: So I will find a column of ice, the thickest I can find to start tying the rope tight so that the others can climb up, and while I'm doing that, I'm looking around for any possible exit out of this chamber that I'm in.

MATT: Okay. You guys watch as the rope gets pulled up and then you get the signal that it's been tied taught, and who's going to climb up first?

LIAM: Hurry up, slowpokes!

SAM: Is that-- is up-- is this the way we want to go?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll go.

SAM: We're doing this?

MARISHA: Yeah, are we going this way?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll climb up.

MATT: So Fjord is climbing up. Make a perception check while you're doing that.

LIAM: Perception check, that is 15.

MATT: 15. Okay. You do not see any signs of exits or egress from this chamber. That odd striation once again catches your eye and you look to the edges of these icy corners. And it looks textured. Almost like some sort of material. Some patterned material is heavily bundled in some of these corner regions.

ASHLEY: Underneath the ice?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Not within ice, but hidden below it? Like it was part of this chamber to being with?

MATT: Possibly, yeah.

LIAM: (sighs) Detect Magic.

MATT: You get up.

SAM: Is that a SWAT team signal, Travis, that you were doing?

TRAVIS: Just climbing a rope.

SAM: Oh, cool.

TRAVIS: Go, go.

LIAM: Go, go, go.

SAM: Go, go, go, go! (chuckling)

MATT: So, detecting magic, you do not get any specific magical auras localized around you, but there is a general film in the air in general. There's just a faint, ever-present, magical aura that fills all space around you.

MARISHA: And it's making patterns in the ice? Almost like when you put a speaker next to water? Is it that type of a thing? Where you can almost see the...?

MATT: And at the distance where he is right now towards the entrance, that's what it looks like, but it's still low light--

MARISHA: Oh sorry.

MATT: -- and those are at the far edges of the chamber.

MARISHA: Climb.

LAURA: What do you see?

TRAVIS: Milk the cow.

MARISHA: Milk the cow? Milk the cow.

MATT: There you go.

MARISHA: I'm up.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: I'm going to wait 'til everyone's up.

LAURA: Are we all going up?

LIAM: I'm not going to poke at anything.

ASHLEY: Yeah, okay.

SAM: We're not going to do the other?

LAURA: We all fit in here?

MATT: Yeah. It's... Yeah, you'd all fit in here.

LAURA: Okay, is it like being in a attic?

MATT: Certain edges, because it is a slanted ceiling and it's a partial collapse, and the chamber is, because of that, smaller than it was originally built to be. But you all fit in here with various levels of comfort and the floor, since it is a lot of broken rock, you can't all be clustered together in one spot. You have to separate out a little bit and make your way into a more open pocket to feel comfortable.

TRAVIS: ♪ Making my way. ♪

MARISHA: Are we going this way or are we just checking it out?

TALIESIN: I'm looking around, seeing anything weird.

LIAM: We can decide. You were poking about and it looked like there was movement beneath this archway. In the ceiling. Is what Matt told you.

TRAVIS: He did?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Movement?

MARISHA: Movement?

LIAM: No, earlier, people asked if we could tell where people had been and you had described it looked like there was scattered stuff underneath the hole in the--

MATT: Signs of individuals dropping down from above.

LIAM: Hmm.

LAURA: Can we see an exit in this room? Any kind of cracks, like there was in that stone that we all saw?

MATT: Right, if you'd like to follow up, make a perception check as well.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll assist you.

LAURA: Guidance! Whoa.

TRAVIS: Wow.

LAURA: Oh! Natural 20!

MATT: Nice!

TALIESIN: Never mind, we're good.

LIAM: Guidance.

MATT: Glancing around, you don't yet see another opening, crack, tunnel. This chamber seems to be, through its collapse, for the most part, locked off. But you do catch that same kind of striated bunches beneath the ice in the corners. And it reminds you of finely-wound silk. And you look past some of the tall stalagmites, some clear, some clouded with imperfections in the moisture that have gathered with other elements that may have been brought forth or just gradually dripped through the ceiling with the water that gathered and froze over. And you see, some look almost like they're attached at odd angles. Like tall, angled limbs.

LAURA: Ice spiders?

MATT: And you see a, up until this point, very well hidden, mostly translucent and white arachnid beast. About 12 feet from side to side.

TRAVIS: What?!

LIAM: 12?!

ASHLEY: Under the ice, or...

LAURA: Or out, just hiding on the ice?

MATT: Just clustered in between all the stalagmites in the corner.

LIAM: We're in the hive. We're in the nest.

LAURA: We're in the spider nest!

MARISHA: Just watching us?

MATT: Just watching.

LIAM: Yeah, it wasn't people jumping down from here.

MARISHA: Yeah, it was spiders. Should we go?

TALIESIN: Make our way out?

MARISHA: We should go, right?

TRAVIS: Just pretend like you didn't see it. Just pretend and just, no, there's nothing in here, perhaps we should...

LAURA: Do you see there any openings in here or should we maybe just get out of here?

MARISHA: Yeah, I don't want to fight this thing in here, so why don't we move really fast so we can fight it down there?

LAURA: Go. Go, go, go.

MARISHA: Go, go, go, we go down.

MATT: One by one, you all begin to descend the rope.

LAURA: I'll go last so I can-- no, what am I doing? Beau, go last so you can jump.

MARISHA: I'll go last.

MATT: Okay, so all begin rushing down. You keep an eye over at it. Doesn't appear to be moving or reacting to any of you.

MARISHA: Just staring at it the whole time. Untie the rope. Jump down.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Is there a way to seal that off?

LAURA: I have Stone Shape prepared. I could try to do that?

TALIESIN: It's not a bad idea.

SAM: Or just keep going through the other door.

TALIESIN: There is no other door up there.

ASHLEY: It didn't come after us.

MARISHA: Yeah, why didn't it come after us?

ASHLEY: That was weird.

SAM: What's wrong with us?

LAURA: Did it look like it was looking at us?

MATT: You watched it for the time that you noticed it, and before the fear, it didn't seem to react or move. It was just facing loosely your direction, hunched there in the back corner.

TRAVIS: Still?

ASHLEY: Was it alive?

MATT: It didn't move.

LIAM: Maybe it was some sort of ice automaton, or maybe it was not-- maybe it was dormant.

SAM: Maybe it doesn't eat things unless they fall into its web?

MARISHA: We saw those striations on other icicles other than just up there, correct?

MATT: No, that was the first you've seen.

MARISHA: That was the first we'd seen, okay.

TRAVIS: Well, we haven't seen a web, right? No webs?

LIAM: No.

LAURA: Just frozen webs.

TRAVIS: Have we seen frozen webs?

LAURA: That's what those things were.

MARISHA: Frozen egg sacs, maybe?

LAURA: Tightly wound--

TRAVIS: Silk. Right.

LAURA: But, like, it seemed like some of the ice-- oh no, the icicles, the bent icicles were the limbs of--

MATT: Were the limbs of the spider.

TALIESIN: Well...

MARISHA: Why you didn't it come after us?

LAURA: Maybe it was nice. Maybe it was friendly and just lonely.

MARISHA: Yeah, maybe we just didn't attack it, so it's fine.

ASHLEY: Yeah, but it wasn't moving.

TRAVIS: Let's check out the other room!

MARISHA: Yeah!

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: Let's do that.

LIAM: With eyes on our six.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Yeah. Eyes--

MARISHA: In fact, I'm just going to walk backwards while we walk in that direction.

MATT: Okay, keeping an eye up there.

MARISHA: See if it follows.

MATT: Okay. So keeping an eye out, you all make your way towards the other exit of the chamber, where you had previously looked before. Okay.

LAURA: You think I should seal it?

TALIESIN: Be prepared to--

SAM: Feel it?

TALIESIN: Seal something.

SAM: Oh, seal it.

TRAVIS: 12 feet across? (laughs)

ASHLEY: That's a big boy.

TRAVIS: That's a big boy! (laughs)

ASHLEY: Big boy!

SAM: I guess we'll go into the other chamber?

TRAVIS: Wait, should we seal it? Can you just seal it that easy, 40 feet in the air?

LAURA: I don't know, let me look. I don't use this spell very often.

TRAVIS: Yeah, take a quick gander because that could be, you know, smart.

SAM: I'll climb into the other chamber while she's sealing.

TRAVIS: You get snatched by another fucking one!

TALIESIN: Is the doorway big enough for the spider to get out of?

MATT: You didn't get quite a look at the entire spider's body. It's possible.

LAURA: Probably. Spiders can crawl through little spots.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's fair.

MARISHA: Yeah, they can get weird their legs.

TRAVIS: What does it say?

MARISHA: You know?

LAURA: I have to touch it.

TRAVIS: Have to touch the stone?

LAURA: So I'd have to get up there and touch it in order to shape the stone.

TRAVIS: And then what happens, can you close off a doorway? Like an archway?

LAURA: I can touch a stone no more than five feet in any dimension and form it into any shape that suits my purpose.

TRAVIS: Five feet in any dimension?

LAURA: Five feet in any dimension, so, I could...

TRAVIS: The archway is like, two people wide?

LAURA: No. Was it that big?

MATT: The archway was about... I'd say about eight-foot tall, its actual size and about six feet wide, so it'd be about the size to let comfortably a person or two people walk through it, yeah.

LAURA: So I could seal it to where there was only a foot of space in the doorway?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: I mean, it might be able to fit through still, I don't know.

TRAVIS: Does it cost a valuable spell for you?

LAURA: It's a spell.

TRAVIS: Huh?

LAURA: It's a spell, but I can try it. But I have to be up 40 feet in the-- I can't get up there!

TRAVIS: What level spell?

LAURA: Fourth.

TRAVIS: I cast Fly on you.

LAURA: But now you used a spell, Fjord!

TRAVIS: (noncommittal noise)

LAURA: (distressed noise) I fly up.

MATT: So, Jester, you now, for the-- how long does it last?

TRAVIS: 10 minutes.

MATT: 10 minutes you can fly. As long as he maintains concentration.

TRAVIS: Yeah. The sword pulses. And you go up.

LAURA: Thanks, Fjord!

MATT: Without issue, you float up to the entrance and, what faint, since the light has been removed, it's just a dark lightless interior of the upper chamber.

LAURA: Can I have some globules?

LIAM: Do you want some? Yeah. I send up two.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to touch the side of the doorway, so I can shape it and try to block off the doorway as much as possible.

MATT: Okay, you begin to press against it with your hand, much like it's wettened clay. You watch as this detailed ceiling, this extremely carefully carved, artistic, Aeorian wall becomes shaped like a kindergartner's mug they made for their adult.

LIAM: Papier-mâché.

MATT: To cover the majority of this entrance. But functionally, seems to be blocking the majority of it.

TRAVIS: You're talking nicely to the spider while you're doing this?

LAURA: Yep. Yep, yep, yep. Stay in there. (to the tune of Brahms' "Lullaby") ♪ Go to sleep, little spider, Don't come and attack us! ♪ (laughter)

MATT: All right. Once you complete that--

LAURA: I just keep, I just fly around as long as I can.

LIAM: In the time that she's taking to do that, I ask Yasha for a hand up into the doorway, the other doorway that's like 10 feet up. And if she hoists me up, I'm going to try to climb myself up into that area.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: And ritually cast Alarm. I'm going to pull silver thread along the length of it so that I can know if anything is coming behind us.

MATT: You got it. And Veth, you've already climbed your way up there, you said?

SAM: I don't know which door he's talking about.

MATT: The only other door.

MARISHA: The floor ceiling door.

SAM: Cool, cool, cool. Yeah. That's the one I'm going into.

MATT: Technically, it's the floor wall door, but yeah.

MARISHA: Semantics. (laughter)

MATT: No, it's actual layout.

MARISHA: Whatever.

SAM: Agree to disagree. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Potato, potahto.

LIAM: Guys, we broke the fourth wall years ago. (groaning)

TALIESIN: Boo.

SAM: Get out! (laughter)

LIAM: All right, I will. (laughter)

SAM: Oh no, he's leaving!

LAURA: No!

SAM: I have that kind of power? Wow!

MATT: Do not empower him. It's too much to give him.

SAM: Marisha, get out!

TRAVIS: He's like, I have to pee anyway.

MARISHA: No.

SAM: Oh. It doesn't work.

MARISHA: No, it doesn't! (laughs)

MATT: All righty, so. He's-- okay.

MARISHA: Taking the opportunity to go pee, I think.

MATT: I respect that, I respect that. So, Veth, you're the first to climb in there, the little bit of light that's beginning to peek inward. You get up over this entryway and you see that hall where it's broken and shifted to the side. It's now this triangular-shaped space that you would have to peer through and step. And as you get to that point, you can see where the jagged stone meeting part itself has been disjointed and shifted to the side. But it is still large enough for a person to go through. Roughly one, maybe two small figures at a time.

MARISHA: So not a Caduceus size?

TALIESIN: One Caduceus.

MATT: One Caduceus.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to float down with my ability to fly and land softly, next to Veth. And then I'll lean over the side and try to hoist everybody else up.

MATT: Okay. You all eventually make your way back up into this odd joint portion of the hall. Looking into the next chamber, the one that Caleb had already seen once, the decline is steeper than his perspective allowed him to really see. It's probably not quite a 45 degree angle downward, but it's pushing about 35.

MARISHA: And it's smooth? It's like a hall?

MATT: No, it's not smooth. Elements of it are smoother than others and there are some where you can see rocky shapes that have ice sheets over it that are fairly smooth, but some of it's broken rock, too, and broken ice. But regardless, it is slick and it is precarious.

MARISHA: We don't want to hit anything as we potentially slide out of control.

TALIESIN: Grab the rope, and I hand it to Jester.

TRAVIS: Yeah. She can fly through it.

MARISHA: Perfect.

LAURA: Ooh, yes. Do I still have the ability to fly? Probably.

TRAVIS: 10 minutes, yeah. Make good use of it.

LAURA: Right?

MATT: Yeah, you have maybe a couple more minutes of it left, yeah.

LAURA: Okay, I'll lift up and fly down, and land at the bottom.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Is there anything to hook the rope onto or is it just me holding onto it?

MATT: It's just you holding onto it at the moment. The room is freezing cold. The temperature significantly dropped when you stepped through the threshold. And now looking inside this chamber, as you fly through with the light granted by Caleb's orbs, you can see it's beautiful. The ice crystals refract the light in hundreds of thousands of different facets, like a room of diamonds surrounding you. And as you coast through holding the rope, you get to the opposite side. How long is the rope that was given? 50 feet?

TRAVIS: 50.

MATT: You cannot get to the-- the rope is not long enough to reach the other side of the chamber.

TALIESIN: Do we have a second to double up the rope?

MARISHA: Yeah, I do. Here. I pull out my rope. Toss it Caduceus so he can tie the end.

TALIESIN: Knot, and a knot, and a knot, and should, yeah.

MATT: That puts you at your final minute of your Fly, just so you know.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: But you head back, fly to the opposite side and you see there are the double doors. And as you get there, there's no handle. There's no knob, there's nothing to grab the doors with. They're just there. And you can see a thick sheet of ice that has slowly built around the edges of them that fill the gaps from where the rest of the stone walls currently would meet with this door.

LAURA: I'm going to pull my little mittens up over my hands and touch the doorway. Does it feel like there's anything? Like, is it safe to lean on and brace myself against the door? Like, it's just a wall?

MATT: You touch it and it's very cold, but it doesn't react in any unexpected way.

LAURA: All right, I'm just going to stand here and brace on the wall and hold the rope as tight as I can for everybody so they can descend as slowly as possible.

MATT: Okay. Who's going first?

MARISHA: Before we descend, can I get to the threshold of this door that we're in?

MATT: Yes.

MARISHA: Kind of step out into the main chamber and step back in. Is the temperature difference noticeable by the threshold?

MATT: It's not like you're stepping into another room and it immediately shifts. It's gradual in that little in-between area, but it is noticeable.

MARISHA: Okay, so no serious drop.

SAM: It's like when you step into the frozen room at Costco, like where they keep the milk?

MATT: Yeah. Like that.

MARISHA: Like the ice spa, Wi spa? The ice room?

LIAM: I'll slide down the rope.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: It's really beautiful.

MATT: So it is who going down the rope, then? If we already had-

SAM: Caleb.

LIAM: Caleb.

TRAVIS: Do we need to set a thread in case ice spider finds a way?

LAURA: He did, Caleb said that.

LIAM: I did that.

SAM: That spider's sealed up.

MATT: Are you going one at a time or are you guys going with a distance between each other?

TALIESIN: I think one at a time will be the way to go.

MARISHA: I think so, too.

LAURA: Yeah, plus I'm holding it, so I don't know if I can support more than one person.

MATT: So Caleb makes his way down--

MARISHA: It's like water-slide rules.

MATT: -- to the base. Who's next?

MARISHA: One kid at a time.

TALIESIN: I'll go next.

MATT: Okay. Caduceus steps down. About halfway down the rope, the temperature noticeably gets even colder. You find your teeth chittering against your jaw. And you feel this numbness beginning to hit the outside of your skin by just the sheer drop in temperature. You, because you have a very high passive perception, glance around and from the cavalcade of teeth-like icicles above you, you see this strange, pulsing, faint blue light that has a number of crystal-like ice protrusions, just floating around it. Like a small orb of jagged jewelry just hovering towards you with this faint mist drifting off of it.

TALIESIN: That's a thing. That's a thing, there's a thing, and, wow, this is-- oh, yeah.

MATT: You guys hear him say this and look up and you see, maybe a half dozen or more of these, all descending from the ceiling towards Caduceus.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MARISHA: Oh, they're all coming towards us? Oh, I think they're elementals! Oh, I think they're ice elementals.

MATT: Let's go ahead and get out the battle map.

ASHLEY: Oh no!

SAM: Oh, god, what's happening?

LIAM: Oh no! We're being attacked.

LAURA: Oh, and it's like an incline, so you can't stand on it.

SAM: I don't know what's happening, but whatever it is, is sponsored by Dwarven Forge's Illuminated Hellscape Terrain, featuring glowing magma rivers. It's available at their web store. Check it out at dwarvenforge.com.

LAURA: Ooh!

TRAVIS: Oh we got a slab going on!

ASHLEY: Oh, god!

LAURA: Oh, this is so cool!

SAM: A raked stage? I love it.

MARISHA: It is totally a raked stage.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MARISHA: Aw, this means we can call downstage and upstage.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Now the rest of you are all up here.

TRAVIS: Or we could, if we were stupid enough.

SAM: Ashley, get out of there. Get out!

TRAVIS: I'm going to be downstage. Downstage right.

ASHLEY: Got to figure out our order.

MARISHA: Can I please enter stage left? It's closer to my dressing room.

LIAM: And I, Medea! (laughter)

MATT: Oh my god.

SAM: I love your movies, Tyler Perry movies.

TALIESIN: Why did I not know this? Of course!

MATT: Okay. So, I don't have a piece of cord I was going to use to set the rope-like protrusion here. What I can do is use this power cord--

LAURA: What?

MATT: -- to make it work. Why not? Little iPad cord.

SAM: But won't your iPad die?

MATT: Nope, it's good. There we go. (laughter) Mostly works!

SAM: Amazing map, and an iPhone charger. (laughter)

MATT: I didn't know you guys were going to be putting a rope through here when I set it up. It's fine.

SAM: I love it.

TALIESIN: Are those cauldrons?

MARISHA: He mentioned there being braziers.

LAURA: I thought it was a narrower-- I thought it was like a hallway. I didn't realize it was a full room.

MATT: Keep the sides. So. If I could have everyone roll initiative, please.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MARISHA: Yeah, braziers.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

LIAM: Yep.

MARISHA: Son of a bitch...

SAM: Guidance.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: All right, so 25 to 20?

LAURA: 20.

MATT: 20? All righty. (background drums)

SAM: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

MATT: 20 to 15.

SAM: Heist music.

ASHLEY: 15.

MARISHA: That's pretty good. Oh, man.

SAM: Bye! Get out of here!

MATT: 15 to 10?

MARISHA: 13.

TALIESIN: 11.

MARISHA: Ugh. I haven't rolled above a 10 this whole game.

LAURA: Switch your dice!

MATT: 10 to five?

LIAM: Nine!

SAM: Nine!

MATT: And the rest?

TRAVIS: Four!

LIAM: And I'll form the head!

SAM: Fjour!

LAURA: Fjour.

TRAVIS: Fjour.

MATT: So, you see about... half a dozen of these entities floating down towards Caduceus.

MARISHA: Half dozen, ouch.

LAURA: Geez, look.

MATT: So they're about here.

TRAVIS: It's fine. It's fine.

LAURA: Oh, cool, though!

MATT: And you see numerous other ones floating above. I'll go ahead and get a few placement markings here, so you can see where they are.

SAM: Icy.

LIAM: How high is the ceiling from the floor?

MATT: It's roughly 20 or so feet.

LIAM: 20 feet. Okay.

LIAM: (mouth sounds increasing in pitch)

SAM: Oh boy. How do you fight ice?

TRAVIS: With a Ring of Fire Resistance.

MARISHA: Yeah. (chuckles)

LIAM: ♪ How do you fight ♪ ♪ a problem like ice crystals? ♪

SAM: Oh no...

MARISHA: Apparently, there's a lava river at some point in time, somewhere in the world.

MATT: All right. Jester, you're up first.

LAURA: Okay. Since I'm stuck at the base, I'm going to Invoke Duplicity as my action.

MATT: All righty. Where are you placing her?

LAURA: I'm going to place her close to Caduceus.

MATT: All right, so you're here.

MARISHA: Should we light these braziers?

LAURA: She's going to stand in the middle, yeah.

MATT: Here? What's the range you can cast on it? 30, 60?

TALIESIN: I meant to, but somehow I forgot.

MARISHA: Oh no!

LAURA: Invoke Duplicity, 30 feet of me.

MARISHA: They're still carried over from last game, too.

MATT: So you can do it here, like either right next to him there or right here.

LAURA: That sounds good. Right there's good.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

MARISHA: It's a bitch.

LAURA: And... Man.

MARISHA: What is it? Sacred Flame?

TALIESIN: No, it's a...

LAURA: The only other thing I can do right now is dumb.

MARISHA: Oh, like a resistance?

TALIESIN: Kicking myself.

TRAVIS: Is dumb!

LAURA: None of my spells are bonus! I can cast Spiritual Weapon.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'll just do it at 2nd-level.

MATT: At 2nd-level. Where are you placing it?

LAURA: Right... Wherever I can hit one of them.

MATT: I'll say here.

LAURA: Yeah, sure, right there.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And I'm going to try to swing at it with my Spiritual Weapon.

MATT: Go for it!

LAURA: That's a 21.

MATT: 21 definitely hits.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Have we tried talking to them?

MARISHA: Diplomacy first. Diplomacy first.

LAURA: Seven plus five is?

MATT: 12.

LAURA: 12!

MATT: 12 points of damage to that fellow there. As it cracks-- and it does radiant damage, you said?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Okay. Hits the ice and you watch the crystals (crack) to the side scramble from the impact and reform without issue. So, that finish your turn? Okay. Now, they go.

MARISHA: Now they go. Uh oh.

MATT: This one flies down to there.

SAM: They rolled very well.

MATT: This one goes to here.

TRAVIS: Just put ice as the enemy in the initiative order.

MATT: And this one goes to here.

LAURA: Oh my god!

TALIESIN: Didn't get two of you.

MATT: They are drawn to the warmth.

LAURA: Yeah, I don't know what that's about.

LIAM: It must've been your head cresting a height.

TRAVIS: ♪ Cold-hearted snake ♪

MATT: And you watch as from above you, as you're all focusing on Caduceus, one heads towards you and three more drift down.

LAURA: Oh man, there's a lot of them!

SAM: It's just ice!

TRAVIS: You guys are in trouble.

SAM: It's ice!

LAURA: Uh-oh!

MATT: As soon as they begin to swarm, the air around you becomes sub-zero freezing.

LIAM: Gulp.

MATT: Immediately, your skin begins to grow numb from the proximity of these strange elemental-like spirits. We're going to have right here-- all those are going to be attacking-- actually, those four are going to be attacking Caduceus, and then there's-- three are attacking Caduceus and two are attacking your duplicate.

LAURA: Duplicate? Yes!

TALIESIN: Thank god.

MATT: It does not give off warmth, so no, they're all going after Caduceus. I'm sorry.

LAURA: Sorry.

MATT: It's a good try, good try, but look at the logistics there.

MARISHA: All going after Caduceus? Is that what he just said?

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Four, five, are there five of them or four of them going after Caduceus?

MATT: Five of them going after Caduceus.

TRAVIS: We want to fight Molly and Caduceus.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah, yeah, yeah!

TALIESIN: You brought, like, a healing spell, right? Like one?

LAURA: I did.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: 22 to hit? (laughter)

TALIESIN: 22 to hit definitely hits.

LAURA: I brought--

TRAVIS: So understanding.

LAURA: Caduceus, I brought multiple ones today.

TALIESIN: My god. I did not bring the spell I meant to.

MATT: You take 20 points of cold damage and your movement is halved.

TRAVIS: Whoa.

MARISHA: Oh, yikes!

MATT: Next one.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

MARISHA: Wait, that was one?

MATT: That was one. 14?

TALIESIN: Misses.

MATT: 13.

TALIESIN: Misses.

MATT: 24.

TALIESIN: Hits.

MATT: That is 17 points of cold damage.

TALIESIN: Mm.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: And that is a 12.

TALIESIN: Misses.

MATT: Misses.

TALIESIN: Ow.

MATT: As they all swarm in, you feel the heat in your body being siphoned out. The cold beginning to oppress you and already at the edges of your face, at your eyes, any point of moisture in your body, you can them beginning to freeze and crystallize and harden in the proximity. There are now two attacking you, Jester. That is going to be a 24.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: You take 27 points of cold damage.

LAURA: Halved.

MATT: Halved to 13, and your movement is halved until the end of your next turn. The other one against you. That's a... 25.

TALIESIN: Weird question, if one of them missed, would I be able to bounce it off the shield?

MATT: You would've. These are attacks on you.

TALIESIN: Oh, is it okay to do that, then? I know that I should've called that.

MATT: It's still during their turn, so we'll do that in a second. I'll resolve this.

TALIESIN: Sure.

MATT: And the other hit hits you for... 26 points of cold damage, reduced to 13.

TRAVIS: Wow. 26? Are these considered melee hits or spell attacks?

MATT: They're considered attacks.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: There's something about their essence that reaches out to you and draws the heat from you.

TALIESIN: It's not-- okay, it's not a melee attack.

MATT: It is considered a melee attack.

TALIESIN: Okay, cool.

SAM: Oh boy.

TRAVIS: (laughs to the tune of the Super Mario Bros theme)

MATT: And two against you, Caleb.

LIAM: Yeah, good.

MATT: 18?

LIAM: Shield.

MATT: Shield. (booms) As it tries to reach out with its energy, the shield protects it and cuts off that element of its reach, the other one is a 20, which--

LIAM: Which down to 15, still hits.

MATT: Still hits at a 20, yeah.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: So you take... 15 points of cold damage and your movement is halved.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Oh boy.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: Tonight's forecast.

TRAVIS: Fireball!

TALIESIN: It's one of the ones that missed, I'd love to try and hit the one that already got hit by the lollipop.

MARISHA: Everybody, chill.

MATT: I'll allow it, yeah.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: Chill out!

TALIESIN: So.

SAM: Let's kick some ice!

TALIESIN: That's a strength saving throw. And, ooh, six.

TRAVIS: Tonight's forecast.

TALIESIN: 15 points of force damage.

TRAVIS: It's cold.

MATT: Okay, it definitely, definitely takes the damage, it fails its save miserably.

TALIESIN: 20 feet back.

MATT: 20 feet?

LIAM: Revenge is a dish.

TALIESIN: Yeah, directly away.

SAM: Served cold!

LIAM: Cold!

MATT: As it dodges, you bring the shield up and you guys hear this loud impact cracking sound as this wave of force energy blasts one of these elemental creatures backward. And you see it gets jammed off and then catches itself in the air and slowly the crystals begin to spin around it once more.

LAURA: Is that the same one that I hit with the Spiritual Weapon?

MATT: It is.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Does it look damaged at all, or?

MATT: It looks damaged, yeah. That brings us now to Yasha's turn. Beau, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Dude, one of us have gone. One.

ASHLEY: So I will make my way into the room.

MARISHA: ♪ Making my way! ♪

ASHLEY: How much of this do you think I have seen? Like, is the opening pretty big?

MATT: You were right towards the opening here, which is about 10 feet wide-ish. And you have a clear view of all these things swarming in on Caduceus in the middle and in the distance, Caleb. You have the globules of light throughout the chamber from Caleb, so you have a clear view.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I will make my way in to the closest-- ♪ making my way into! ♪ (laughter) ♪ This cold room. It's so cold. ♪ So, I'll go to the-

MARISHA: Ashley sings the classics.

ASHLEY: Whichever one is closest.

MATT: That'd be the one right across you towards Caduceus there.

ASHLEY: Great.

MATT: Okay. Are you going carefully for half movement? Because it is slick, or you going full bore?

ASHLEY: Yeah. I mean, might as well go full bore.

MATT: All right, make a dexterity saving throw for me, please.

ASHLEY: Yeah, okay.

TALIESIN: Raging?

ASHLEY: Yes, I am raging.

MATT: So as you rage, you go running across the ice.

TRAVIS: Ragé!

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: You do have an advantage on it because you are a barbarian, so.

ASHLEY: Okay. Ooh... That's a one. That's not much better. Okay, so, seven.

MATT: Seven. You go raging and charging towards Caduceus and as you do, you pass an area of slick ice and your feet (whooshes) out from under you. You slam and fall prone on your back and slide.

LAURA: Oh, all the way down?

MATT: All the way to bottom of the chamber.

ASHLEY: Can I kick it on the way there?

SAM: Can I kick it?

ASHLEY: As I land?

LIAM: Yes, you can!

SAM: Can I kick it?

LIAM: Yes, you can!

MATT: I'll say you can take your attack on the way, if you'd like, but you're still prone. You could use, I'll say about half your movement. So you would not be able to move past this if you get back up.

LIAM: Damn it, Yasha.

MATT: Or you can take the attack as you go, but it'll be at disadvantage because you're prone during the attack as you're sliding.

ASHLEY: Okay. Oh, man, I want to try to get up. I'm going to just, yeah, I'm going to get up. I have to get up. I have to get up.

MATT: Okay. Now, as you get up, frost has gathered around you. As you tore through a number of their frozen auras.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: You take...

LAURA: Uh-oh.

ASHLEY: Brr!

MATT: 16 points of ice damage. As you just coast through a bunch of their freezing auras and flash frost just begins to burn into your skin. But you stand up and you're there now at the bottom, right next to Caleb. Four of them.

ASHLEY: Okay, that is my turn.

MATT: You can still attack.

ASHLEY: Oh my goodness! That's not my turn, then. I will attack.

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: You have two right now that are swarmed around Caleb and you have access to each of them.

ASHLEY: Okay, so whichever one is closest to me, which I think is the one right in front.

MATT: Right there? Okay, go for it. So roll for an attack.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: Light them on fire.

ASHLEY: Ooh! 24.

MATT: 24 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: I bet he's going to make lighting them an action.

ASHLEY: I'm going to roll that again. Not much better.

TRAVIS: Caleb, do you have the Glove of Blasting, or do I still have it?

LIAM: You have it.

ASHLEY: 28 for the first hit.

MATT: 28 for the first, 28 to damage, you mean?

ASHLEY: 28, yeah, sorry. Yes, damage.

MATT: That's awesome, all right, great.

ASHLEY: And then second hit. Is 18.

MATT: 18 hits.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

ASHLEY: 13.

MATT: 13. All righty. So after you slide down, slamming your feet against the wall, barely kick yourself back up and use that momentum, you take the blade and swing once, twice heavily down upon this creature, the first strike, it's like cutting through a piece of frail brick. It impacts and breaks and then crumbles a bit. The second swipe, you cut through and you actually feel the resistance of the cold energy. And as you pull back, the blade itself now has a layer of frost across it. And as you look up, it's holding itself together, but you see it shaking a bit and the ice crystals on it are partially broken and chipped. So it's taken some heavy damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: To one?

MATT: To one of them.

MARISHA: Wow. And you said there's 12?

MATT: There's nine.

MARISHA: There's nine.

LAURA: Nein! Nine...

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Look at that.

MARISHA: He always brings it around.

TRAVIS: Look at that look.

LIAM: The Nonagon!

MATT: So.

LAURA: ♪ The Nonagon! ♪

MARISHA: Can I get there? Oh, sorry. Are you moving on?

MATT: No, is that the end of your turn? Now it's your go, Beauregard, and Caduceus, you're on deck.

MARISHA: Can I get there with my speed, 50?

MATT: Over to here, you mean?

MARISHA: No, that brazier.

MATT: With your speed, you can.

MARISHA: Can you see me hitting that brazier, yeah.

MATT: Four, five... 50, you can get there, yeah.

LAURA: Just think about how pretty this fight is, with all the diamond reflections on everything.

MATT: It's beautiful.

LAURA: Fucking gorgeous.

MATT: Make a dexterity saving throw for me, please.

TALIESIN: I was going to say, you want to be on that side.

MARISHA: Let me roll better. Let me roll better. (laughs nervously) 29.

MATT: 29. You actually use it to glide a bit. You get a few steps and then can slide. You see frost shooting off the back of your heels until you hit a bit of stone and you kick off of it to slow your momentum and then dodge around the side, right up against that one piece of ice on the side of the brazier there.

MARISHA: Cool.

MATT: With your passive perception, you do see, at the base of the brazier on this side, there is a small cubby about that big.

MARISHA: Oh! Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get to the cubby. What's with the cubby?

MATT: I mean, you're adjacent it, you see it.

MARISHA: Oh, I'm adjacent to the cubby. Okay.

ASHLEY: Get to the cubby! Can't do it.

MARISHA: What's in the cubby?

MATT: You do take...

LIAM: There's some pencils and a point eraser.

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: You take eight points-- eight points of cold damage as you enter the frozen aura of the elemental to the left of you.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay. What's in the box? What's in the cubby?

MATT: You glance inside. You look and it just looks like an empty, like an empty shelf space. And you can see it opens up on the top, like it's leading up higher in the pillar. But there's nothing else you really see in there, unless you want to use your action to investigate.

MARISHA: I do.

MATT: Go ahead and do that, roll an investigation check for me.

MARISHA: All right. All right, all right, all right. 25.

MATT: Okay. 25. You glance inside as you feel the frost gathering around your ears now. You can't even feel that side of your face. But as you look inside, with what very little light you have, and you don't have your goggles on you because you gave those to Veth, but thankfully so rolled pretty high, so you managed to still meet the DC. You can see in the opening that heads up, at the base of it, there is some sort of a series of circles, like small, concentric circles that get smaller and smaller that are connected with various lines.

MARISHA: Series of concentric circles, right?

MATT: Yes. Some sort of a glyph.

MARISHA: A glyph?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: That's in the bottom of the brazier?

MATT: Inside of it at the base of that opening.

MARISHA: Any type of glyph that I would recognize in this quick glance?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

SAM: Know your glyphs.

MARISHA: Name that glyph! 17.

MATT: 17? Vaguely, at this angle, it's kind of tough. You're getting either Transmutation or Evocation.

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: Somewhere in that space.

MARISHA: All right. Can I take whatever left action that I have and shout to Caleb?

MATT: I'll let you shout something.

MARISHA: Or to people? All right. I'm just going to say: I think we need magic to light up these glyphs. These, sorry. I think we need magic to light up these braziers! Glyph in the brazier! Brazier glyph!

TRAVIS: And just to be clear, you said columns somewhere?

MATT: These braziers are about five, six feet tall. And they're just these columns in the middle of the ground. And they look just solid except for on the opposite end. There's a slight opening, like a tiny oven, like a clay oven entrance.

SAM: ♪ (vocalizes horn wail in background music) ♪

MARISHA: Do I have a bonus action still?

MATT: You do.

MARISHA: Patient Defense.

MATT: Okay. You get ready.

MARISHA: That's my turn.

LAURA: What's happening?

MATT: Caduceus, you're up. Veth, you're on deck.

SAM: Bad ice.

TALIESIN: It'd be a bad thing to find out if these guys get an attack of opportunity.

MATT: At the start of your turn.

TALIESIN: Goddamn it.

MATT: Because you are standing within the frozen aura of four of these creatures.

LAURA: Oh no!

MATT: Rolled pretty low. You take 11 points of cold damage.

TRAVIS: Fuck!

TALIESIN: Don't like that. Oh boy, okay. That certainly changes things.

MATT: Yasha, because I almost forgot. You take an additional eight points of cold damage from striking it with a melee attack.

ASHLEY: Eight points?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: I can maybe move and like, tank for you. Maybe draw them away.

LIAM: I'm surrounded.

MARISHA: I know, but...

TALIESIN: I'm going to cast Spirit Guardians at level three.

MATT: Spirit Guardians, all righty.

MARISHA: Can you cast from a distance? You don't necessarily need to get up to them.

LIAM: No, I know, that's probably what I'm going to do--

TALIESIN: 15 feet.

LIAM: But I'm like, is it going to light them up or is it going to damage?

MATT: 15 feet radius, you said?

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: So 15 feet radius would be this.

MARISHA: Evocation or Transmutation?

LIAM: Yeah, I mean that's either hit it with fire or dump some transmutation, but it's probably fire.

TALIESIN: Let's see.

LIAM: That's what I was going to do before you even got there.

TALIESIN: So I'm going to just try and curl my way around where Jester's duplicate is and I'm just going to see what happens when I step away from one of them.

MATT: Try and step away from--

SAM: ♪ (vocalizes horn wail in background music) ♪

MATT: From one of them?

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to stay in the--

MATT: Right there?

TALIESIN: -- attack realm of, yeah.

MATT: Okay. So as you move back that one as a reaction, you feel this energy lash at you like a frozen whip. That is a 13.

TALIESIN: That does not hit.

MATT: So you manage to move aside.

TALIESIN: Shit. All right, can I do anything as a bonus action or am I just? Nope, there's nothing I can do as a bonus action because all of my spells are bullshit at the moment. I can't cast Healing Word because I just put up Spirit Guardians, right?

MATT: Correct, yes.

TALIESIN: Goddamn it.

MATT: Sorry, buddy.

TALIESIN: (blows raspberry) Is that your turn?

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's my fucking turn. (laughter)

MATT: Okay!

ASHLEY: Oh, I hate that feeling.

MATT: Veth, you're up. Caleb, you're on deck.

SAM: Jester's still holding the rope, right?

LAURA: Yep!

MATT: Yep.

SAM: I'm going to jump on it and run down the rope! (quick footsteps)

MARISHA: Oh, ninja!

LAURA: I let go of the rope. Just kidding.

SAM: (screams) (laughter)

MATT: What's your speed?

SAM: 35.

MATT: 35 gets you right there.

SAM: You know what though? I think I'll stop early. It seems dangerous in there. And also, I don't know who's engaged with who. So I'll stop even earlier, maybe just outside the Spirit Guardian range.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: And I'm going to whip out this-- somewhere I got this, but I have it, so I'm going to use it. I'm going to whip out this scroll and read it. And cast Flaming Sphere.

TRAVIS: Ooh!

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Bowling.

MATT: Where would you like to place the Sphere?

SAM: The one next to Caduceus, but, you know, in a way that doesn't hurt Caduceus.

TRAVIS: It'll roll downhill.

MATT: Right, so right here?

SAM: And, I don't know, I've never cast this before, I can roll it around, right?

MATT: You can.

LAURA: Cool!

MATT: In fact.

LIAM: Like a bowling ball.

TALIESIN: Maybe there's three in a row, or.

SAM: Yeah, I mean, it doesn't have to be a straight line, right? Like, I can go around with it?

TRAVIS: Bend that shit?

LAURA: Do a topsy-turvy ball?

MATT: I'll show you.

LAURA: What are those little raccoon balls with the tails?

MATT: It appears anywhere in 60 feet. And any creature that ends its turn within five feet of it has to make a dex save or take 2d6 damage. So anything nearby that ends its turn next to it takes damage. Also, as a bonus action, you can move it up to 30 feet and ram it into a creature. In which case, that creature also has to try and make the dex save.

SAM: But it can't just go, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop and hit them all?

MATT: No.

TALIESIN: But if it's next to two?

MATT: You can ram it next to a creature and then other creatures have to move away from it or if they end their turn next to it they take damage.

SAM: Well then, in that case, I'll make it appear between two of them. Because it has a five-foot, I guess, radius or something, right?

MATT: You can put it next to... You can put it here and get it next to three of them.

SAM: Yeah, that!

MATT: But it'll also be next to Caduceus, so you'll have to move out of its range next turn, your call.

TALIESIN: Put it on the other side, maybe?

SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe I'll just go for two of them. I'll go for two of them.

MATT: Two of them. There you go. So as you finish reading the scroll, as you're holding onto the rope and grabbing it, the scroll burns away and you guys hear this strange whining sound as this little opening seems to open in the air and (whooshes) this ball of fire emerges from it, slops onto the ground and begins rolling. So it lands there. You can use your bonus action to ram one of those, if you'd like to.

SAM: Oh wow. I will do that. I will pick a random ice thing to ram.

MATT: All right, so the one directly-- which of these two would you like to hit?

SAM: The ice-y one. They're all the same to me.

MATT: Sure!

SAM: The better, the more attractive one.

MATT: You got it. (laughter) It does not make its saving throw. So go ahead and roll 2d6.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay. I assume it's vulnerable or-- Oh, come on, double ones?! Poo.

MATT: Aw.

SAM: Two points!

MARISHA: Double ones? Oh my god.

MATT: So the sphere attempts to ram into it and it dodges out of the way, the flames lick past and it takes a little bit of damage.

SAM: Does it double the damage because it's made of ice?

MATT: You don't know, you barely hit the thing!

SAM: But does it say, "Argh! I'm so attractive, not the face!" Or anything?

MATT: You have no idea.

SAM: All right.

MATT: You rolled double ones, yo. All right, that finish your turn, Veth?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: You got it. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: I have a question about the spell that you and I worked out together. Web of Fire, it says "flame crackles out around the caster and streaks of fire rapidly snake along the ground." It doesn't say-- we didn't write in stone: straight lines, arching, curving? What kind of control do I have on them?

MATT: We said you have control over to hit the certain creatures you want to, you still have control of that.

LIAM: Okay, well then I'm going to try this. I'm going to pull out the cat's cradle crusted over in phosphorus and then slam it down into the ground and send all five of them forward along the line of the rope and then splitting out and sending one to each of the braziers to erupt at each brazier.

MARISHA: Oh, get it!

LIAM: And one on the one that is hurting Ca-- the one closest to Jester's duplicate.

MATT: Okay. What's the range on that?

LIAM: 60 feet.

MARISHA: Please work.

MATT: 60 feet? Okay, so. You watch as Caleb, first at the top of your turn because you are in range of three of them, you immediately take... 21 points of cold damage.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: From the auras burning into you. And right now you begin to lose feeling in your fingers and arms, but you've practiced this over and over again. So even without feeling, you still go through the motions. And as you slam your hands down, you watch as this arcane energy sparkles at the tips of his fingers. And as it hits the frost and stone, they spider out into these little burning, web-like filaments, like you'd see five separate elements of black powder paths, or-- what's the word I'm looking for?

MARISHA: Fuse?

MATT: Fuses, thank you. Snaking across the ground, they (whooshes) up to the middle of it and then spread out to all five of them. Where do you send them on the braziers?

LIAM: Well, Beauregard's at a little hole, a cubby, right? So I will do my best to aim, if I can see those, to the side, to hit the sides where those ports would be to erupt along the side of it. To try to fart fire into the little port.

MATT: I understand. I will say you can see all of them. The one that Beauregard's at is a little obscured. Make a perception check for me.

LIAM: What if I just aimed where Beauregard is?

MATT: Then you might hit Beauregard.

LIAM: I know.

MARISHA: I've got Evasion.

LIAM: Yeah. That's what I do.

TRAVIS: Wreck her!

MATT: Okay. All right. So...

MARISHA: Do it.

MATT: Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: I approve of this message.

LIAM: 26 points of fire damage.

MATT: 26 points of fire damage?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Make a dexterity saving throw.

MARISHA: I get to do Evasion, right?

TRAVIS: Higher than a 10!

MATT: Evasion is if you succeed.

LIAM: Half or zero.

MARISHA: If I succeed. Right, right, right, right, right. 17.

MATT: What's your DC?

LIAM: Oh, higher than that.

MARISHA: Yeah. I rolled terribly.

LIAM: 18.

MATT: Yeah, so you take the full brunt of it.

TRAVIS: What are you doing today?

MARISHA: I rolled a seven again. I've rolled so many sevens.

LAURA: Are you changing out your dice?

MARISHA: I am! This was supposed to be the Beau die!

LIAM: Evasion makes it-- it's been a while since I've been a rogue, but half damage, right?

MATT: It's half damage on a success and then no damage on a failure. Sorry, no, sorry.

MARISHA: The reverse.

MATT: Half damage on a failure.

LIAM: If she succeeded, she would've taken zero.

MATT: Correct. Sorry.

LIAM: If she failed, she takes half.

MATT: Yes, so you take half the fire damage that was there.

MARISHA: Which is 20, sorry, 14?

LIAM: 26 halved.

MATT: So, 13. 13 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: Oh, shit, shit, shit.

MATT: You suddenly, as you're like defending against this weird crystal, you see this, out of the corner of your eye, this little red (whooshes). And right as you notice it, you burst into flames. You are on fire!

TALIESIN: Yeah, you are!

MARISHA: By all mathematics, I should've been able to dodge that, so...

SAM: That's hot.

MARISHA: Just rolled terribly.

TRAVIS: You are on fire! Hey, we got fucking fire!

MARISHA: ♪ This girl is on fire ♪

LAURA: Oh god!

MARISHA: Worth it. Worth it.

TRAVIS: (sings)

MATT: So you watch as the majority of these streak off, up inside of these small little open spaces. And then (whooshes), the top of the pillars suddenly burst into arcane flame. As it does, immediately you see all these ice entities seem to shiver and quiff, quiver at the immediate reaction, you know what I mean!

TALIESIN: Yeah. (laughter) Carry on.

SAM: Queef?

MATT: Quiff! You know, quiff! (laughter) It's been a long day.

TALIESIN: My last laugh, Matt, for the day.

LIAM: Too dry in here for that.

MATT: Indeed. Too cold in here for that! (laughter) Quiver and shift to the proximity of the fire.

MARISHA: The shivering queef! (giggles)

SAM: You're a child, Marisha. A child.

LIAM: That's the Big Bad. That's the Big Bad.

TALIESIN: Man, I haven't snorted in a while. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh, it's the exhaustion.

TALIESIN: I know.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: And then one of them hits the one that's by Caduceus, on this side, you said?

LIAM: The one that's smack-dab against Jester's duplicate.

MATT: You got it. It does not succeed on save, so it's 26 points of damage. As it (whooshes) shoots up and ignites and bursts around it-- Jesus! (laughter) You watch as the fire consumes a majority of its exterior and as the flames burn away, it's barely holding on. The crystals have mostly now melted away and its small pulsing blue energy is barely maintaining cohesion. That finish your turn?

LIAM: Yeah. I'll stay put. I will get hurt if I try to move.

MATT: All right, that finishes Caleb's go. Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: Can I try and pull myself up this rope to the top of the entrance? Because I'm outside.

MATT: Up to here, yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, and then can I see any of this happening down below me?

MATT: You've been able to see all this happen. You're like-- at this point, everyone had pulled up inside and there was a bit of tunnel before the entrance. So you've seen everything in front of you.

TRAVIS: I think I'll just hold onto the rope and I'll unleash some Eldritch Blast at that one that's nearest to Caduceus, closest to me.

MATT: You got it, go ahead and roll an attack on that one.

LIAM: I got this one move. It's crazy.

TRAVIS: Yeah! (laughter)

MARISHA: Stop, I was just getting better!

ASHLEY: Me, too. I got the giggles.

TRAVIS: 19?

MATT: 19 hits, go ahead and roll damage. Ah, I'm going to fucking murder all of you! (laughter)

TRAVIS: That's... (laughter) 15 points of force damage.

MATT: 15 points of force damage.

SAM: 50?! 50?!

TRAVIS: One five, one five.

LAURA and SAM: Oh, 15.

MATT: 15.

TRAVIS: 19 to hit?

MATT: 19 hits.

TRAVIS: That is 12 points of force damage.

MATT: 12 points, you got it.

TRAVIS: And then the third--

SAM: 200 points?!

TRAVIS: Yep! And another 18.

MATT: Yep, hits.

TRAVIS: Okay, great. Last one. Is 13 points of force damage.

MATT: 13 points of force damage, nice. You fire them off. As they impact the sides of it, you see it hit the ground with a clatter and then lift back up.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: It looks hurt, but it's still fairly hearty.

TRAVIS: I'll stay where I am.

MATT: You got it. Finishing that, brings us to the top. Jester, you're up.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Beginning of your turn.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: 19 points of cold damage, reduced to nine.

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: Okay. Oh my god.

MARISHA: You got this. (laughs)

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to... Would I know-- does radiant fire damage-- that's not like fire damage?

MATT: No, it's a holy burning, but it's not considered fire.

LAURA: It's not fire, okay. Okay. Cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool. Then I'm going to follow in Caduceus' footstep and I'm going to cast Spiritual Guardians.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: On... I'm going to cast it on where I am. On my real person.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: And that's at 3rd-level. Ooh! Yeah, 3rd-level.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And then I'll use my Spiritual Weapon to attack the ice crystal that I attacked before.

MATT: Okay, so you shift it over here.

LAURA: Ooh, natural 20! (laughs)

MATT: Great! So that's double damage on it. So go ahead and roll and double the dice.

LAURA: Great. Ooh, 14 plus five, 19!

MATT: 14 plus five's 19, nice! So as it moves towards the edge of Caduceus' radius, it slams into the-- (laughter)

SAM: It's still bouncing around!

MATT: (laughs) Apparently! This is--

TALIESIN: It's like The Wave, making its way around the circle.

MATT: It really is. It keeps making its way around the circle, yeah.

LIAM: No eye contact, no eye contact.

ASHLEY: But the thing is, guys, I love that we're all laughing about farts right now.

MATT: Yep, yep. I love it. All right, so yeah. You swing past the barrier of spiritual guardians that are swarming around Caduceus. As your giant serrated lollipop swings through the blanket of celestial beetles, it crashes into this elemental. It takes a heavy hit. It's starting to look pretty hurt.

LAURA: Whoa, okay. It's taken three hits already and it's still only-- jeez louise!

MATT: All right. That finishes your turn?

LAURA: Yeah!

MATT: It's now their turn. So at the beginning of the round--

TRAVIS: (fart noise)

MATT: Go ahead and roll your damage for both of your--

TALIESIN: And they have to all make wisdom saves.

MARISHA: For my on fire?

MATT: Here we go.

TALIESIN: Boo!

LAURA: What is it? 3d8.

TALIESIN: It's 3d8.

LAURA: 3d8.

TALIESIN: Boo, boo.

MATT: Success. Failure. And failure. So the top two over there are success. So what was the damage roll?

TALIESIN: Seven.

MATT: Seven, all right, so not great, but that's okay.

TALIESIN: No.

LAURA: 17.

MARISHA: Don't look at me. Don't look at me.

LAURA: Oh, wait, no. It's not plus anything. It's just 3d8, right?

TALIESIN: 3d8.

LAURA: 3d8 flat, 12.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: (sighs)

TALIESIN: And the fireball does damage on their turn as well, right?

MATT: It does. And then 12, two, fail.

MARISHA: (cry-laughing) I don't know why.

MATT: Success, no, fail, actually.

LAURA: Oh. (laughs)

MATT: What's your DC again, 17?

LAURA, TALIESIN, and MATT: 18.

MATT: Fail, and fail. So 12 for all of it.

TALIESIN: That was it. Do I have any other d4s to use if I'm conscious long enough?

MATT: The one that Yasha had struck last round is assaulted. by a swirl of tiny pink hamster unicorns, and you watch as it shakes in place and then (explosion) shatters into frozen moisture and crystal ice upon the ground.

LAURA: I want them to look like inferno unicorns now, so they're-- they look like they're on fire.

MATT: Okay. Angry, burning red eyes?

LAURA: Yes, yes.

TRAVIS: Nightmares?

MATT: Perfect. You got it.

LAURA: Yeah, nightmares!

MATT: The two that are next to your--

SAM: (surprised noise)

MATT: -- all fail.

SAM: Do I roll?

MATT: And-- you roll 2d6. And success.

SAM: This time, it was a one and a four!

MATT: There you go.

SAM: Five points. Doubled, I'm assuming. Because they're ice.

MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)

SAM: They're vulnerable to fire, maybe?

MATT: So you watch as they burn in the proximity of it. Not a high fire damage, but nevertheless, it hurts them. It hurts them. All right, so now, it's their turn. That's two against you, Jester.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Two against you.

MATT: That is 20 to hit.

LAURA: (scoffs) Yeah.

MATT: And 21 to hit.

TALIESIN: Mm.

LAURA: (dejected) Yeah.

SAM: Aww!

MATT: As they swing towards you, 16 points of cold damage reduced to eight, and... 17 points of cold damage reduced eight, so 16 total on that one.

TALIESIN: Ah, fuck, man.

MATT: These all swarm in on Caduceus here.

LAURA: Let's all just go to sleep after this!

TALIESIN: They're also half-speed, if that matters.

MATT: Indeed, but it doesn't matter, unfortunately, because you're still pretty close.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I know.

MATT: And he flies.

TRAVIS: Where you at, Cad?

TRAVIS: What number are you at?

TALIESIN: 67.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: But this is about to be brutal, unless he rolls really poorly.

SAM: ♪ (sings to background music) ♪

MATT: 12. That misses.

TALIESIN: No.

MATT: 15?

TALIESIN: No.

LAURA: Wow, you got the shitty ones around you.

MATT: 21?

TALIESIN: Hits.

LAURA: Shit. Sorry!

TALIESIN: Shh, you did that.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: Don't worry, he's fine!

MATT: 23 points of cold damage.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: And natural 20. (groaning)

TALIESIN: I cancel!

MATT: As a reaction, you do cancel it.

TRAVIS: Oh, lucky!

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

MATT: Oh, and it's a good thing you did! 24 points of cold damage.

TALIESIN: Yep, that would've been the end of me.

TRAVIS: Wow!

SAM: Whoa!

LAURA: You're down? You're down?

TRAVIS: No!

LAURA: Caduceus is down?

TRAVIS: No!

SAM: He's okay. He's okay.

TRAVIS: Would've been.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I would've been if I had not canceled that.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

TRAVIS: Definitely would've been--

MARISHA: But you're not looking good.

MATT: Beauregard.

TALIESIN: When it hits my turn, I might be down.

SAM: You're a cleric!

MATT: You do have Patient Defense, so it has disadvantage on it's attack against you.

MARISHA: Correct. Am I also on fire, you said?

SAM: ♪ This girl-- ♪

MARISHA: Or was it that I just burst into flame?

LIAM: ♪ Hotter than a fantasy ♪

MATT: No, no, it was a burst--

TALIESIN: I could use a heal--

MATT: -- of flame, then.

TALIESIN: -- on your next turn.

MATT: So it rolled a natural 20 and a two, so it misses.

MARISHA: Awesome.

LAURA: So the one that you hit Beau with didn't even catch on fire?

SAM: ♪ This girl is on-- ♪

MATT: She caught on fire.

LIAM: I bet she absorbed it instead.

MATT: Exactly. You said he was sending it towards her. If she would've--

LIAM: Well, I was... I did great.

MATT: You did great! (laughter) She had a high chance of dodging it with her evasion, so if she would've managed to succeed and evaded, it was going to go and, so, that was my--

LIAM: Makes sense to me. That's why I said nothing.

MARISHA: I rolled like shit.

MATT: So, that finishes their go.

MARISHA: Terrible.

MATT: Now that brings us to Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay, so--

MATT: Yasha, top of your turn. Because of the aura of there, you take five points of fire damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: Mm.

ASHLEY: Okay, so what I'm going to do-- I'm going to start with letting out a battle cry, and everyone within 60 feet gains advantage on attack rolls and saving throws.

SAM: What's that? What's that now?

ASHLEY: So I don't know if it'll reach. Bonuses on attack rolls-- I'm sorry, advantages on attack rolls and saving throws.

MARISHA: This is your battle cry?

ASHLEY: This is battle cry.

MATT: It reaches you. It does not reach you.

SAM: Yeah!

MATT: And everyone else gets advantage on attack rolls and saving throws.

SAM: Woo!

TALIESIN: Fuck!

ASHLEY: Okay, and then I'm going to attack the one closest to me.

MATT: Go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay. Ooh, 25?

MATT: 25 hits!

ASHLEY: Okay. Savage Attacker.

SAM: ♪ (sings to background music) ♪

ASHLEY: That's a little better. 28 points of damage for the first attack.

MATT: 28, nice. You take seven points of cold damage as the energy blasts back from your melee attack against it.

ASHLEY: (exhales) Okay, second attack is a natural 20.

MARISHA: Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

MATT: Roll damage.

TALIESIN: End it. Seven, so 14.

TALIESIN: Bonus dice for that? Oh, wow, losing my voice. I'm going away.

ASHLEY: So just the dice, or--

MATT: Just the dice double.

ASHLEY: Okay, so...

LAURA: At least we [inaudible].

ASHLEY: Okay, so 27 total.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I may go down hard.

MATT: 28 and 27. That's over 50 points of damage in one round. That's great.

ASHLEY: (exhales)

MATT: You do take eight points of cold damage from the second strike.

ASHLEY: Oh boy.

MATT: And as you, with the second blow, the sword swings wide, and you (grunts) feel the pain, but look up and watch as the creature is no more. It is scattered in a spray of snow and ice chips in the direction of Caleb, (whooshing) spraying the front of him slightly.

TRAVIS: Ice chips.

MATT: You can still move if you'd like.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Boy, I feel like there's a lot going on over by Caduceus and Jester. Wait, which is the real Jester? Which is the duplicate?

LIAM: The one by the door.

LAURA: The real me!

LIAM: Downstage.

SAM: Ask both a question that only Jester would know the answer to.

ASHLEY: (laughing) That's true.

LIAM: One of us only lies!

ASHLEY: I'm going to move a little closer to, but right out of range of the little ice creature, just ready to attack.

MATT: So stay put?

ASHLEY: I'm going to stay put.

MATT: Okay. (laughter) All right, that finishes your go, Yasha?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Beauregard, you're up. Caduceus, you're on deck.

MARISHA: I don't think I can do anything to light this brazier, so I'm going to turn around and--

MATT: You do take three points of cold damage from being in the proximity of its aura.

MARISHA: I take three points of ice damage, and then I'm going to do just big-- two sweeping swings with my Belaborer. I have advantage on these, don't I?

MATT: You do.

MARISHA: Thank god, because one's a one. So 26 for the first one.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: And 28 for the second.

MATT: That hits. Roll damage on each.

LIAM: Try to get him out of there.

SAM: How do we get Caduceus out of there?

LIAM: And we lift him out, he's going to get hit--

TALIESIN: I think I'm going to be dead next round.

SAM: Do you have a transportation type of spell?

TALIESIN: I won't have time. I'm going to drop instantly.

SAM: But it's your turn!

TALIESIN: I'm going to drop immediately on my turn.

MARISHA: 10 and 12 damage.

TALIESIN: I'm out.

MATT: 10 and 12?

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: --before they get to go again.

TALIESIN: I'm in aura. I'm out.

MATT: You do take an additional eight points of cold damage from the two strikes, but--

MARISHA: Even with my staff?

MATT: Even with your staff, but you do destroy with those final hits.

MARISHA: Oh!

MATT: They'd taken quite a few hits previously, so as you slam it both with the staff, a second one sends it flying into the far wall, where it (shatters) just breaks into a thousand pieces.

MARISHA: In that case, I'll move, and bonus action Flurry of Blows the one that's harassing Caduceus.

MATT: Over here?

MARISHA: Whichever one feels like it's most harassing Caduceus.

MATT: They're all pretty much most harassing Caduceus. All right, moving into that aura is a new cold aura. You take another one point of cold damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Bonus action: two more strikes against it.

MARISHA: (grunting) Pop, pop, pop! Still at advantage? So 21 for the first one.

MATT: 21.

MARISHA: And 21 again.

MATT: Both hits.

MARISHA: No, sorry, 22. Whatever, never mind.

MATT: Well, so the first one-- those are to hit, right?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Roll damage for the first one.

MARISHA: Okay. Wait, not those, not those. For the first one?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Okay, 13, 14.

MATT: You take four points of cold damage from the impact, but this one, which was already barely holding on because of Caleb's spell earlier, shatters at the blow.

TALIESIN: I may live.

MARISHA: Great. Four damage? So my second one, can I attack the one that's on the other side of me?

MATT: You can continue to move and come in for this one if you want to, or this one.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'll do that one that's on the other side of me, the one that, yes, yes, yes.

MATT: You got it.

MARISHA: Just full-on superhero-style punching through ice. Yeah, that's a natural 18, so 30. No, sorry, 28, 28.

MATT: Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: I'm not attacking with my staff.

MATT: Because you're not moving, you're technically not moving more than half your movement, so you don't have to make a dex save to try and maintain your footing.

MARISHA: Terrible damage, seven on that one.

MATT: Seven damage on that one, all right.

MARISHA: And Extract Aspects.

MATT: Good call. You do take four points of cold damage from the impact.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: They are resistant to nonmagical slashing and piercing.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: They are immune to cold and poison damage and vulnerable to fire damage.

MARISHA: Yeah, you know, that all tracks.

SAM: Oh, fire damage was just doing so much more!

MATT: It was doubling. You were just rolling really shitty. (laughter)

MARISHA: Fire is bad. Everyone knows that. Everyone knows that!

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: Hey.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: But it's really helpful to know!

MARISHA: Thanks. Thanks. That's my turn.

SAM: Come on, Caduce.

MATT: All righty. Caduceus, beginning of your round.

SAM: See what happens.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: You take one point of cold damage from one aura, eight from another, and then six, so one, then eight, so nine total. Are you still up?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Then the six addition to that, so 14 total.

TALIESIN: I am still up.

MATT: All righty!

TALIESIN: 14, thank you for knocking that out!

MARISHA: Just the one made the difference?

TALIESIN: Because that would've fucking done me. I'm at six hit points. So yeah. Okay.

MARISHA: Wow.

TALIESIN: I'm going to-- okay, the wound closure, do you use-- I can't remember. If I use Cure Wounds, that doesn't use my healing, the-- oh god, sorry, hold on.

MATT: Look at your parapet again.

MARISHA: Your parapet situation?

TALIESIN: Yeah. This is my brain. That doesn't use my--

MATT: No, when you roll a hit dice, you get hit points. That's during a short rest.

TALIESIN: Okay, so that's just--

MATT: So it doesn't affect actually magical healing.

TALIESIN: Okay, that's okay. I'm going to cast Cure Wounds at--

LIAM: Periapt.

TALIESIN: Let's do a 4th-level Cure Wounds.

MATT: Sure.

TALIESIN: For fun, so.

MATT: 4d8 plus five, go for it.

TALIESIN: Maybe I'll roll a better 4d8 than I have been. Eh. I'm 20 points back, so a little better than before.

MATT: There you go.

TALIESIN: And that's pretty much what I can do, so I'm just going to-- I ain't moving anymore. I'm just going to stay put and hope this all ends.

MATT: Fair enough. If you could, make three concentration checks for me, please, to maintain your Spirit Guardians.

ASHLEY: You have advantage on saving throws.

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah. Oh, I already have advantage on concentration checks anyway.

TRAVIS: Good thing.

TALIESIN: Saves or checks?

MATT: Checks, or it's a saving throw, so whatever your constitution saving throw is.

TALIESIN: 13.

MATT: All right, you maintain.

TALIESIN: 22.

MATT: Maintain.

TALIESIN: Nine?

MATT: No.

TALIESIN: Fuck!

LAURA: Fuck.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

MATT: All right, that finish your go?

MARISHA: Dang.

TALIESIN: I mean, in more ways than one, yeah. (laughter)

MATT: Veth, you're up. Caleb, you're on deck.

LIAM: Yes, sir.

ASHLEY: Wow.

MARISHA and TRAVIS: (laughing)

SAM: So, before Caduceus' next turn, they're going to get a go, and Beauregard's going to get a go.

MARISHA: Mm-mm.

SAM: No.

MARISHA: Jester will get a go. And then they--

SAM: Is that real Jester or fake Jester?

TALIESIN: It's fake Jester.

SAM: Oh, and Fjord.

LAURA: It doesn't matter. I can cast spells from my fake.

SAM: Okay, I will-- just because I--

MATT: By the way, is your duplicate concentration?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Much easier to keep track of which one the real Jester is because with the Spiritual Guardians up, the duplicate is gone.

LAURA: That's a good point.

MATT: Sorry.

LAURA: That was a--

TRAVIS: Still good, still good.

SAM: We're fine. We're fine.

LIAM: Absolutely.

LAURA: Fuck!

TALIESIN: You could eventually run over here, too, and then--

LAURA: I will, if I can.

TALIESIN: You can't.

LAURA: I can climb the rope, maybe, and get uphill. It's uphill, so it'll be difficult.

TALIESIN: It's a slope.

SAM: I will-- just because I like this rope so much, I'm going to hang on it with my knees.

MATT: Well, who's holding the rope up here, by the way?

TRAVIS: What's up?

MATT: Are you holding the rope up there?

TRAVIS: I'm staying up at the top, yeah.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Sure, I'm going to hang on it with my knees like that, upside down, and shooting the thing.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I like that we're battling all these things and still, like, I'm-- (grunts) (laughter)

SAM: Hold it steady, guys! And you know what, I will throw a knife instead of the thingy.

MATT: Okay. Who you throwing it at?

SAM: I'll throw it at the one closest to me.

MATT: Right there? Go for it. Roll for the attack.

SAM: With advantage.

MATT: With advantage. (whooshing)

SAM: 18 plus stuff, so it's got to hit.

MATT: That hits. You can go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: And--

MATT: And it is sneak attack because you had advantage on the attack roll.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: And next to Caduceus, regardless.

SAM: Okay. (counting) 25 plus six is 31, plus I will pump an extra 3d6 into it.

MATT: Sure.

LAURA: (whispering) You're still good.

SAM: 38 points of damage.

MATT: 38 points of damage. The dagger strikes it, and you watch for a moment as it lodges itself in the center of this throbbing blue energy, and the crystal just shatters all across the chamber floor. The dagger plummets, then slides down the bottom of the floor--

SAM: Oh no!

MATT: -- towards the other door.

SAM: No, no, no! (laughs)

TRAVIS: (hissing)

MATT: That's your action.

SAM: On bonus action, I'll charge with my Flaming Sphere at the other one.

MARISHA: Get it.

MATT: Hit a side there. As it rolls across the ground, slamming into the crystal entity, it fails its save. (laughs) So 2d6.

SAM: Four points of damage!

MATT: Up to eight.

TRAVIS: Yeah! (laughs)

TRAVIS: What is it, 2d4?

SAM: It's 2d6. I just keep rolling terribly.

MATT: All righty. (laughs)

SAM: Does the Flaming Sphere-- does it catch the USB cord on fire, or am I okay?

MATT: It will in a couple rounds.

SAM: Okay, cool. (laughs)

MARISHA: It's insulated, you know. It's got, it's good, yeah.

TRAVIS: Latched in.

MARISHA: It's great.

TALIESIN: You could move it. No, never mind. Oh, okay.

MATT: All right, so, that finishes your go. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: I'm going to finish what I started. I raise the cat's cradle up, and I spin my finger around and wrap it up tighter in string and bring it right back down and cast at 5th-level, and I will send one of the snakes to the final brazier and hit every last creature on the map because there's four of them.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: That's five targets.

SAM: (poofing)

MATT: That one alights, and then roll damage for the other.

LIAM: Yep, eight, so that's 9d6.

MATT: Failed save. Failed save. Success, and success.

LIAM: It's 28 total.

MATT: So they both take it.

LAURA: So that's what, 52? No, 56?

LIAM: 56.

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: Both of them just shatter and melt in midair. You hear the explosion, and there's just a mist left behind as immediately, the ice is turned to vapor and this small cloud of fog, where they both just shriek. No longer exist to the right of you and Jester. You did at the top of your round take one point of cold damage from proximity to one of them, just as a note. The other two impact and are extremely hurt. They are barely holding on. They have no seemingly intellect of their own, so they're not looking to flee. They don't have a sense of self. They are just hungry for heat. As the last brazier lights, (whooshes) the doors behind you and Jester (whooshes)--

LAURA: (gasps) Uh oh!

MATT: -- open up, the two that you are leaning against. I need you both to make dexterity saving throws for me.

LAURA: Oops!

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: Oh, advantage!

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Yeah, you do have dex saves.

MARISHA: Tight, tight, tight, tight.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay. 21 for me.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: Remember that scene in the Titanic?

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.

LIAM: 15 for me.

TRAVIS: (imitates violin)

MARISHA: (sliding)

LIAM: If I fail, I'll succeed it with the ring.

MATT: You do fail.

LIAM: Okay, so I use the Ring of Evasion.

ASHLEY: Is there any way I can--

MATT: So you do succeed, okay. You both barely manage to move to the sides.

LAURA: Well, I'm holding onto the rope, so I'm assuming (laughs) Fjord probably gets yanked.

SAM: (yelping)

TRAVIS: (yelps)

MATT: Oh god, there you go.

TALIESIN: Yay!

TRAVIS: I'm strong. I-- (shrieks)

MATT: You both--

LIAM: You just clench your glutes and hold the rope?

MATT: Just shift over to the side. You hold the rope and pull off the end, and the door opens to the left of you. You both manage to prevent just falling into the next chamber.

LIAM: (laughs) That was close.

MATT: All righty. That finishes Caleb's go.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: You can move if you'd like to.

LIAM: I will move just maybe five or 10 more feet to the left, so I don't fall in.

MATT: Fair enough. That brings us to Fjord. Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: Yeah, my dexterity's not so great, and doors are opening and shit at the bottom of the room. You know, like when you go tubing, you can kind of aim where you want to go?

MATT: Yeah?

LIAM: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Can I try and, like, jump and slide, so I'll slide right towards where Caduceus is?

MATT: We can certainly try.

TRAVIS: I will try and kaplinko my way down to Caduceus.

MATT: I dig it. To get right where Caduceus is, you will be passing by Veth.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: Okay!

SAM: You've also dropped the rope, I assume?

TRAVIS: Yeah, fuck that rope.

SAM: (surprised yell) (laughter)

MATT: So you don't need to worry about that. Veth, make a dexterity check for me.

SAM: Check?

MATT: A dexterity saving throw. I would say with disadvantage because you weren't expecting it, but you have an advantage, so it's just a straight roll.

SAM: Natural one.

MARISHA and ASHLEY: Oh!

MARISHA: No!

MATT: Veth. (whooshing)

SAM: (screams)

LAURA: I've still got the rope on the other end!

MATT: You do, but she's now just gliding off like this because you're holding one end of the rope.

SAM: (screams)

MATT: So are you holding on to-- she holds onto the rope, so you go falling out the side, but are you still holding the rope?

SAM: No!

LAURA: No, you're not going to hold onto it?

MATT: You let go of the rope?

SAM: I was never holding the rope. My legs were on it.

TRAVIS: Yeah! (laughs)

LAURA: So you're still, like--

MATT: That's right. Then, I'll tell you what: as you and the rope go sliding by, roll a d20 for me.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

LIAM: And the rope is going-- (whirs)

LAURA: Yeah, just tangling back up.

SAM: Two! (laughs)

LAURA: Yeah, I know. Can we try to catch her?

ASHLEY: Or grab her on the way down?

LAURA: That's like a reaction.

ASHLEY: Because I'm right there?

MATT: I can't give you guys 16 different reactions, and when it's, like, three rolls have failed in a row here.

LIAM: (like Sean Connery) Indiana, let it go.

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Let it go.

ASHLEY: Let it go.

MATT: Veth just slides into the next chamber.

SAM: (surprised shout)

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: Do I catch my knife on the way? (laughs)

MATT: We'll get to you in a second.

SAM: Okay. (laughter)

MATT: Fjord, what are you doing? You trying to scoot this way?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm trying to slide right down to where Caduceus is.

MATT: Okay, make a dexterity check, not a saving throw. It's not a reaction.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: But I will allow advantage on this because you are doing this intentionally, and it's just sliding.

TRAVIS: A dexterity check?

MATT: Yes, you add your dexterity bonus.

TALIESIN: With advantage. Everything should-- Well, but, like, we have advantage on a ton of stuff.

TRAVIS: 18, just an 18 with no modifier.

MATT: Yeah, where you want to go?

TRAVIS: Straight down to Caduceus.

MATT: (whooshing) All right, so you are sliding past him. You will either bowl through Caduceus, or you can try and stop or go with him.

TRAVIS: No, I literally want to give him a big-ass hug. I'm going to hit him, and when I hit him, I'm going to cast Thunder Step.

LIAM: Boosh!

MATT: All righty! You do enter the frost radius of two of them when you do so, so you do take 14 points of cold damage.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: As you slide into their space, but as you're scooting down, sending up ice bits and bits of rock and pebbles behind you, you reach out, scoop up Caduceus. You both go about to tumble as you finish the spell, and then--

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

TRAVIS and MATT: (explosion)

MATT: -- explode outward. The flaming sphere, I will say at this point because it's no longer in your sight, will dissipate.

SAM: Sure, sure.

MATT: So where do you two want to go?

TRAVIS: I'm going to go to the corner, down over here, right here.

MATT: You both manage to stumble a bit and land against the wall, catching yourself, not quite falling completely over, using the edge of it to stop your momentum. It hurts. That shoulder's going to be sore in the morning.

TALIESIN: Yep, everything's sore.

MATT: But you're okay at the moment. How much damage do both of them take, and what's their save?

TRAVIS: 21-- 21, 24, 24 points of thunder damage, and it's a constitution 18.

MATT: No, and yes.

MARISHA: Yes, damn.

MATT: 24 to 12. They're already both pretty hurt, and so regardless of making its save, as you both vanish from sight, there's a brief moment where just, they go (whooshing), and the space where they were, suddenly (whooshing) impacts and then (explosion) detonates outward in this shockwave that sends all of their ice shards and essence just scattering across the room at enormous speed. The rest of you in the chamber have to protect yourself as you're suddenly pelted with tiny bits of broken ice, and with that quiet moment, you realize that nothing else in the chamber beyond you seems to be moving, reacting.

TRAVIS: Would I have hit you?

LAURA: Yes!

TRAVIS: Would I have hit you also?

MARISHA: I think you would've.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: But what if you, like--

MATT: That is within five feet, so yes, make a constitution saving throw.

LAURA: You slid just down with Caduceus and bamfed out when you were out of close range?

MARISHA: I still have Battle Cry.

MATT: You do.

TRAVIS: What?

MARISHA: Natural 20.

ASHLEY: Ey!

MATT: So you take 12 points of thunder damage. I think that's right, 'cause it was 24?

TALIESIN: Maybe we should get into the next room and take a minute.

MATT: So Veth.

SAM: (yells)

MATT: You slide into darkness, and where you are expecting a floor to meet you--

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: You're free falling.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: Oh, shit!

MATT: And falling and falling. I need you to make-- just roll a d6 for me.

SAM: Okay. Two.

MATT: Two, okay.

LAURA: Do you have anything?

SAM: I've got stuff.

MATT: You fall for 50, 60, 70 feet.

LIAM: What are you doing?

MATT: You don't really see much around you because you don't have darkvision-- but you have the goggles on still, right?

SAM: I do. I will at some point cast Feather Fall.

MATT: Well, up to you. You've fallen for 70 feet at this point, and looking around you, all you see is bits of jagged ice and stone-- (whooshing)

SAM: I will cast Feather Fall.

MATT: Okay. (poofing)

LIAM: No, better be sure. Wait another minute.

MATT: And you just slowly begin to drift for 80, 90, 100, 10, 120, 150, 200 feet.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

MATT: 250 feet.

TRAVIS: Oh no.

SAM: It doesn't last forever.

MATT: At about 270-- you fall pretty fast, though. At about 270 feet, you begin to just barely see, rising up to you, the floor of this pit.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: You see broken bits of jagged stone walls and pillars that are like a spike trap at the bottom. Debris and elements of fallen architecture just litter the floor at the bottom of this pit, and you land on your feet gently, taking no damage.

LAURA: (relieved) Ah!

SAM: (laughs)

TRAVIS: I thought he was going to say lava. "You took 75--", yeah.

TALIESIN: If that had been literally anyone else--

TRAVIS: Toast, toast.

MARISHA: Dead.

TALIESIN: -- and done. Anybody else.

MATT: As soon as that rope went, I was, like, okay!

LIAM: Spider-Man slide into dark.

MATT: Yeah, hey--

SAM: No worries.

ASHLEY: (shouting) Veth, are you okay?

LAURA: Veth!

TALIESIN: Kay, kay, kay.

SAM: I don't know. Can I even hear them? That's far! Yeah, I can still hear them.

MATT: You can hear them, yeah.

SAM: (yells)

ASHLEY: Are you hurt?

SAM: (yelling) No, I'm okay!

LIAM: I start sending the globules down just to get an idea of the space.

MATT: No worries. As you peer over, you can see now a mostly collapsed chamber with jagged rock and ice punching through the top of what might have been once a beautiful structure, some sort of ceremonial interior, but the majority of it has tumbled inward, and the floor has bottomed out from underneath. This 25 by 30-foot chamber area has no floor. All of it, all of whatever structure was there has fallen into this pit into endless darkness, and as you hear the faint echoes of Veth calling up to you, we're going to take a break.

SAM: Ooh, good spot!

TRAVIS: I'm going to hit you with a Cure Wounds.

TALIESIN: I'm going to do a-- if we can take 10 minutes, I can also heal, give everybody who took damage a little bit of--

TRAVIS: Okay, we'll wait for that, after the break.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Fjord is the master of the drive-by Thunder Step.

LAURA: Yep.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's great.

LIAM: Moving target.

MATT: I love it so much. It is, like, the hottest use of that spell.

LIAM: (zooming) (poofing)

TALIESIN: Oh, boy!

LIAM: (zooming) (poofing)

TRAVIS: Heads up, heads up, heads up, heads up! (impact) (laughter)

MATT: All righty, be back here in a few minutes, and we'll pick up from this scenario, and see where it goes from there. So see you guys in a minute!

MARISHA: Lord, have mercy!

Break

V.O.: Now experience the ultimate way to play by sitting in a table with your friends, with your face in a screen, progress! D and D Beyond. Log in to explore strange worlds and fantastical cities. Thanks to a company based in a really boring one that handles all the tedious math and reference stuff for you. So you can finally unleash the epic quest you've been crafting since middle school on your friends. Or just do what most people use it for, cranking out endless new characters while they're bored at work. I could finish these spreadsheets, but what if this Paladin owned a horse? (uplifting music) Perfect. D and D Beyond. Play with advantage (cinematic music) Yes, now they're drinking glizzys. What's a glizzy!? It very popular pop culture thing right now for people- No, it's not. (laughing) To consume and talk about glizzys. This whole ad team just comes up with names with Zs in it. Try this out, a grizzy. (laughing) Hmm, okay, okay, don't like that one. How 'bout a whizzy? (laughing) (quirky music) I'm in the earliest stages of growing all my chest hair back, which I removed. Oh, interesting. (laughing) It's a shame you can't go swimming right now. Because Astrid's outfit was so low cut I didn't want to blow the illusion with my X-Men for- Yeah, that's true. Yeah, you do have a nice, hairy chest. Hmm. Fuzzy. We'll see what happens. I can't really show mine, but I can give you a little, you can see something. Okay, all right. I'm trying to get this to attach here but I can't grow hair on my neck right here. Can you guys? I think you need an adapter for that. No. Get like a nice thyroid mustache. I assume that your chest hair is just, is just manicured into the same shape as your goatee. With like a hole in the middle. Yeah, but it's upside down. Okay. So it's an upside down kind of smile on my chest. So when I look down, I'm smiling at myself via my hair. I mean, I've seen it. I saw you when you opened for The Fartiste that one time. (laughing) It was quite an act. Ay, so I got this gig. They said if he can do that. (laughing) Hey, critters, Laura Bailey here. Let's see what's up in the Critical Role shop. (upbeat music) I mean, the traveler only says impulse purchases are a good decision. These holidays, you know, they're just around the corner. Rolling investigation if you want, it's basically perfect. Oh my gosh, it's so amazing. This is, this is a lot of stuff you guys, we have like so many cool things right now. So click on over to the Critical Role shop. (laughing) Don't worry, there's a few more minutes in the break. You still got time. (smooth jazz music) Hello, everyone. It's me. Marisha Ray, Creative director for Critical Role content. And I want to take a moment to speak from the heart about how much we appreciate your support. No frills, no crazy gags, just honesty. Over the past five years we've made a lot of ridiculous promos in an attempt to earn your subscription here on Twitch. We've leaned on juvenile prop humor, cheap costumes, and putting our loyal employees in slightly embarrassing situations eagerly hoping that we've captured your attention. Today, I am not resorting to edge lords jokes written by Brian W. Foster or dressing Sam as a celebrity to recreate an obscure commercial most people haven't seen to remind you that subscribing with a Twitch Prime account requires you to resubscribe each month. We don't always need an elaborate green screen gag or have to put Matt in cosplay to tell you that you can easily give subscriptions to fellow critters, if you're feeling generous. I mean, hell, I've consumed entire production days shooting complicated parody promos featuring Taliesin Jaffe as a vintage spooky boy in full monochromatic glory all in the hope that your smile may turn into a sub, but not today. No weird graphics, no puppet murder. No Sam Riegel. It's just me, here to say thank you. Love you all. Good night. (laughter)

Part II

MATT: And welcome back! Wow, you all, you all came in hot on that, all right! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck!

MATT: You make one quiff. (laughter) All right.

TRAVIS: It's all over. (laughter)

MATT: So.

TRAVIS: (tiny fart noise) (giggling)

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: Fjord suddenly slips-- no. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Yeah, 275.

MARISHA: Oh god.

MATT: We come back within the frost and ice-coated chamber, where you saw Veth vanish down the extensive pit into darkness below. Seemingly survived because you heard her shout back up to confirm that she is indeed alive. But as you all now glance into this floorless room around the rubble, all you see now below you is the endless expanse of dark, dark pit below.

TRAVIS: There are no sorts of stairs working its way around in this shaft of darkness?

MATT: Not that you can see, no.

TALIESIN: What's above?

MATT: A very low ceiling of broken, fallen stone, ice, and looks like elements of broken pillar that have buckled and are being pushed against the wall. Most of this room collapsed.

LAURA: Veth, are you okay?

SAM: I'm fine. I'm going to look for a way out. I don't know if this is the way or what, but--

TRAVIS: Are you-- are you alone down there?

TALIESIN: There, there, there.

SAM: I don't know!

LIAM: So hard to understand.

SAM: Am I-- am I alone?

LIAM: (high-pitched noise)

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: (growling)

SAM: 20!

MATT: So here at the base of this ragged cavity, you do find two frozen, extremely broken bodies. One appears to be human at first glance. One appears to be halfling at first glance, and they lie amongst the shattered shale and fallen litter and debris. It's about 20, 25 feet wide, and the chamber walls itself are a little oblong and strangely shaped from the naturally formed tunnel that you plummeted through. But, I mean, that's what you see at that glance around you.

SAM: I will look over the bodies real quick, see if I recognize them or if they're fresh, or anything like that.

MATT: Okay, make an investigation check.

SAM: 23.

MATT: Okay, their bodies have been picked over. They look like they've been frozen and broken here for a while.

SAM: Okay, then I will set about making my way through the spikes and trying to find some sort of wall or exit.

MATT: Okay, make another investigation check for me, please.

SAM: Okay. I don't know why I rolled twice, but the one that I would count is a natural one, but with all sorts of things, it becomes 23.

MATT: Right, okay. You glance around at the interior here, and it is-- the pit is solid, but it is cluttered here, and you can't seem to find any give, any entrance, any weak way here. It's hard to get through because there is little light. It is very cluttered. You do pick up a weird acerbic smell in the air that wasn't there previously.

SAM: Acerbic smell; from my--

LAURA: What is "acerbic"?

SAM: -- my alchemical knowledge, do I pick up any-- is it acidic or any, or, or--

MATT: It feels acidic, but you can't quite pinpoint specifically what the smell is.

ASHLEY'S TABLET: -- just were able to-- (laughter)

ASHLEY: Sorry! (laughter)

ASHLEY: I'm so sorry.

SAM: I don't think that you are. (laughter)

TRAVIS and SAM: (yell)

SAM: We'll post that later on. (laughter)

MATT: But you do, after a moment of searching, following the smell, find what you think is the source of that scent.

SAM: Okay?

MATT: As you glance in this one section, and there is, like, an oily, tar-like substance that is between a couple of these broken slab elements.

SAM: A tar-like substance.

MATT: It looks like, a slick oil tar.

LAURA: And it's not frozen?

MATT: It's not frozen.

LAURA: I'm not there.

MATT: You're not there.

SAM: I will touch it.

MATT: Okay, you touch it, and it tingles the end of the fingers. (slurping) It shoots out and begins to wrap around you.

LIAM: Damn it, it's an ooze!

MATT: I'm going to go get the other battlefield map. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Oh no, you're fucking by yourself!

LIAM: He's with a black pudding or something, oh!

MARISHA: No, it's the black-- oh no! That's not good.

SAM: I thought it was, like, a goo!

LAURA: You survived a fall, and you--

SAM: What do I got-- I'm trying to find a way out!

TRAVIS: Oh no!

ASHLEY: Oh, that's so cool!

LAURA: In such a teeny, tiny little room all alone, Veth.

TALIESIN: Oh no!

TRAVIS: We didn't even short rest or nothing.

LAURA: Can we-- did we hear her scream?

MATT: You do. You hear the scream. (laughs)

LAURA: Oh no!

MATT: You don't know what it means, but. First, we shall see, as it does get an ambush round on you.

LAURA: (frustrated raspberry)

LIAM: We got all these people up here. Shit.

MARISHA: 275 feet down?

MATT: That is 17 to hit.

MARISHA: That's far.

SAM: Misses.

MATT: It misses. You (whooshing) pull back as these weird tendrils of black shoot out towards you and then withdraw, and with that, you watch as this black mass of thick, slimy, oily tar begins to slowly emerge from the cracks below. Roll initiative for me, please.

SAM: Okay. Natural one!

MARISHA: Oh no!

MATT: It's still an ability check, so.

SAM: Ability check?

TRAVIS: What's your dex mod?

SAM: I mean, it's six total.

MATT: Well, with your dex mod, and it's your Reliable Talent. I believe it does work for that, right?

SAM: I don't think so. Wait, what? My initiative just says plus five.

MATT: Initiative is an ability check.

LAURA: Is it?

MATT: I'm pretty sure.

LAURA: I never knew!

TRAVIS: ♪ I never knew, I never ♪

TALIESIN: That changes many things,

TRAVIS: ♪ I never knew ♪

TALIESIN: I would say.

LAURA: ♪ Never knew ♪

MATT: Doesn't change too much--

TRAVIS: ♪ I never knew ♪

SAM: ♪ Knew, knew ♪

MATT: Because--

SAM: ♪ I never knew ♪

TALIESIN: It changes the very concept of the universe right there. (laughter) Everything I thought I believed. All bets are off now.

LIAM: What the fuck is wrong with us? (laughter)

TALIESIN: Look, it's coming out of my mouth. That video ruined me. (laughs)

MATT: I know.

TRAVIS: (shrieking)

MATT: It's a dexterity check. It is an ability check.

LAURA and TALIESIN: Wow.

SAM: But a dexterity check, I don't get Reliable Talent on dexterity checks.

MATT: What does your Reliable Talent affect?

TRAVIS: (laughs) Oh no. Have you not been doing this?

SAM: What?

MARISHA: What's a rogue? (laughter) What?

MATT: Whenever you make an ability check, oh, that lets you add your proficiency bonus, so no, you're right.

SAM: Ah!

MATT: You are correct.

SAM: I am the best at D&D.

MATT: I just wanted to double check. So, so six, okay.

SAM: So six.

MATT: Weirdly, you're going first.

SAM: Hey! (laughter)

MATT: It rolled higher, but it's pretty-- it has a really high negative.

SAM: Okay, okay, I will... I will bonus action Disengage.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: And then... back flip, back flip, back flip away from it. Or, you know, run.

MATT: How far?

SAM: As far as I can get.

LIAM: That's so cool.

MATT: Five, 10, 15, 20.

LIAM: God, it's like something out of The Hobbit.

MATT: 25 is about, that's about as far as you can get right there. You're just in the bottom of this area, like, "Fuck, fuck!"

SAM: Uh-huh, and I will-- I will shoot-- let's see here. Do I have spells that I could use on this thing? Not really, unless it doesn't like gusts of wind. Ooh, maybe this? Well, I don't know if it has wisdom. Let's see here. (reading and muttering) Has to make a wisdom saving throw on a failed save-- failed save. (mutters) Sure, I'll try this. I don't know what it is. Can it see? Does it need to see? I don't know, who knows! I take out a pocket full of buttons, and I throw them and cast Hypnotic Pattern.

MATT: Hypnotic Pattern, okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: Does it need to see? Does it need to have intelligence? I don't know. We'll find out!

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's pretty fair in the moment.

MATT: Wisdom saving throw.

MARISHA: I like the idea of a pocketful of buttons. That's cool.

MATT: 13.

SAM: 16.

MATT: You got it. So it is currently charmed and incapacitated.

ASHLEY: (to "Pocketful of Sunshine") ♪ I got a, I got a pocketful of buttons ♪ (laughter)

MATT: (laughing) Oh my god!

TRAVIS: It's coming apart at the seams.

MATT: We are--

TRAVIS: This is re-entry.

MATT: Yeah, oh yeah.

TRAVIS: One of the heat shields cracked.

MATT: We are a mentally broken crew tonight.

ASHLEY: Well, when you're not around people and then you get around people--

TRAVIS: (falsetto) ♪ Oh, I got a pocketful of buttons ♪

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Yeah, yeah. So you watch as it begins to emerge. (squelches) You finish, you throw the buttons, and the buttons (whooshing) flash in the air above it in a multicolor spray as it reacts-- (gurgles) It just holds its position there.

SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Okay, okay, I will call up: Um, guys! (screams) I'm being attacked by a black ooze of some sort! (yells) Maybe-- should I just come up, or are you coming down?

MARISHA: Oh, yeah, you should come up.

SAM: But what if this is the way out?

ASHLEY: Can you look for any--?

SAM: I've got 55 seconds.

MATT: That's your turn.

SAM: 54 seconds.

MATT: All right, that's all we got. It's now the black ooze's turn.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: It's incapacitated. Its friend, however--

ALL: (gasps) No!

MARISHA: Oh no, you got to get out of there! You got to get out!

MATT: Emerges. (squelching)

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

LIAM: "Go home and get your shine box."

MATT: And 15, 20, it does manage to just get in range towards you.

SAM: Oh no!

LAURA: Okay, wait. I have an idea.

MATT: It's going to go ahead and-- its pseudopod (whooshes) strikes out towards you for... a 19 to hit.

SAM: Hits!

MATT: All righty. You take... three points of bludgeoning damage.

SAM: Well, I mean.

MATT: Plus...

TALIESIN: It's the plus that gets you.

MATT: 16 points of acid damage.

SAM: Ooh!

MARISHA: It's true, yeah. Yeah.

TALIESIN: It's the plus that gets you.

SAM: I can Uncanny Dodge that, I guess.

MATT: You can, yeah, so you take eight points.

SAM: Okay, plus the three.

MATT: Is your armor magical?

LIAM: Uh-oh.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

SAM: It is.

MATT: It is.

SAM: In that it can change its appearance--

MATT: Correct, but it is magical armor.

SAM: It is a magical armor.

MATT: It resists the acidic effects of its pseudopod and does not diminish, so.

TRAVIS: Oh. So the 16 points are negated or no?

MATT: No, no, you still take the damage, but the armor is not melted away. (groaning)

MARISHA: Fuck, get out!

SAM: Yeah!

MARISHA: Get out!

SAM: You think?

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: So that ends its turn.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: Go ahead and make a concentration check for me.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

LIAM: Shit.

SAM: Pretty good, 17 plus something.

MATT: Okay, you maintain concentration on your pattern.

SAM: Okay, okay.

MATT: So now, you all heard what Veth said. What are you doing?

LAURA: I'm going to Dimension Door.

MATT: Okay. You cannot see the distance. You have to go-- is it somewhere you can--

SAM: You can pick a direction.

MATT: You can just choose. That's true, you can just pick a direction.

SAM: But you also have to pick a distance. So you would have to guess how far down it is.

LAURA: Fuck.

MATT: You could throw a torch down there. (laughs) That's a way to do it. Somebody else could.

LAURA: Somebody else, so I can Dimension Door down really fast?

TALIESIN: Well, we'd have to wait for the torch to land, but no.

LAURA: Do we have a torch?

SAM: (laughs) I've got all the torches!

LAURA: We can see-- we can see-- Caleb has lights down in the tunnel, right?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, he put down his globules, right?

LIAM: Yeah, I sent them down already, so they-- they're some distance in.

MATT: What's the range on that spell?

LIAM: Oh, it's like, it's over 100 feet.

TALIESIN: It wouldn't have made it all the way down, then.

LIAM: 120 feet.

MATT: So it can get less than halfway down.

SAM: ♪ (vocalizes background music) ♪

LAURA: You can say--

TRAVIS: You don't want us to engage? You're okay?

MARISHA: Yeah, do you want us to jump in the hole?

TRAVIS: Nott, do you need help? (laughs)

SAM: No, I'm fine!

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Get out of the hole.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: So, you guys are all staying up there?

LAURA: She just said not to come down!

MARISHA: I guess so!

MATT: Okay, all right, so y'all hold and wait. Top of the round. Veth, you're up.

SAM: Bonus action: Disengage. (snaps fingers) Cast Spider Climb and start running up.

ASHLEY: What if there's--

LIAM: I'm going to pull up the Driftglobe and light it up in that moment of panic.

MATT: Okay. So you bonus action disengage. You cast Spider Climb, which means the charm goes away.

MARISHA: What's the Driftglobe? Does it have a further range?

LIAM: Daylight.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: What if these things can go up the wall?

LAURA: Well.

SAM: They probably can.

MATT: All right, so you can now Spider Climb. That puts you at your full movement at 35 feet.

SAM: Uh-huh, I think.

MATT: All right, so you are 35 feet up the side here. Okay.

SAM: I hope they can't move faster.

MATT: That finishes your turn.

SAM: Oh no, they probably can!

MATT: Okay. And beginning of their turn. (slurping) (yelling)

MARISHA: No way!

MATT: Moves 40 feet up the wall.

SAM: 40 feet?!

MARISHA: No!

MATT: And wraps around you with itself-- (mini clatters) -- as you fall and die.

TALIESIN: It doesn't even take its action to get 40 feet up the wall?

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: Oh.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, we should help now.

MATT: Five, 10, 15, 20.

SAM: (yells) Remember when I said I was fine?

MATT: So now, as you're going up the wall, you look behind, and one just slithers up the side of the wall and wraps around you. It's not holding you, but it's now filling the space around you.

MARISHA: You need to get down?

MATT: The other one is now trying to climb up after you as well. All right, so who's doing what?

LAURA: I'm going to grab Beau.

MARISHA: Okay?

LAURA: And I'm going to Dimension Door us down as much as I can see because he cast Daylight.

MARISHA: Do you need a light to get down there before we do this?

LAURA: He cast Daylight.

LIAM: But it's not everywhere. It's 60 feet. I shove the Driftglobe into Fjord's hand and turn into a giant eagle, (whooshes) and I grab Caduceus and Fjord and start flying down the passage.

TRAVIS: You just want to stay up here?

TALIESIN: I'm 26 hit points.

TRAVIS: Yeah, just leave him up.

LIAM: All right, all right.

TALIESIN: Nope, nope, nope, nope.

LIAM: All right, I grab Yasha by the neck, yep, and Fjord.

SAM: You know what, I'll be fine. It's okay, guys.

MATT: I think my giant eagle mini is at the old table.

MARISHA: I will, right before Jester grabs me, I'm going to take out a celebone, and I'm going to crack it, and I'm going to throw the celebone down there at the end so that she can see as we go down.

LAURA: So it's a rave party.

MARISHA: It's a rave.

MATT: You got it.

MARISHA: It's a rave torch at the bottom.

MATT: Okay, okay, it will fall, and by the end of the round, the full distance to go there.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Shit.

MARISHA: It's your choice.

LIAM: But you're holding a cantaloupe that's glowing Daylight 60 feet in every direction, in your hand.

MATT: All right, so--

LAURA: I'm going to just-- I'm going to bamf us 250 feet down. I don't know how much farther it is after that.

MARISHA: Do it.

MATT: You're just choosing 250?

LAURA: I'm just choosing 250.

MATT: Okay, both of you (whooshes) reappear (whooshes) and fall an additional 20 feet.

MARISHA: Can I do like what I've done before and, like, brace Jester on top of me and take the blow?

LAURA: No!

MARISHA: I've got Slow Fall.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Okay, so you manage to fall, you manage to kick off the wall, and what it does is instead, Slow Fall reduces the damage to you to little, but you don't take all of her damage away.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: So you just reduce her damage.

MARISHA: But I pad her a little bit?

MATT: You do, so you take five points of bludgeoning damage from the impact.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Still falling 20 feet onto Beau.

MATT: And both of you.

MARISHA: (groans)

LAURA: I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

MARISHA: I'm good. I got this.

MATT: Right there in that space.

LAURA: Okay, now you can do something!

SAM: Well...

MARISHA: Oh, am I there? Can I go, am I there?

SAM: Hate to be a rules lawyer, but she doesn't have her goggles, and there's no light down there.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Well, I threw down the celebone.

MATT: Well, no, she threw the celebone down.

SAM: Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

MARISHA: So it's a rave down there right now.

MATT: Well, actually, well, it would've been your action to crack it and throw it down before you went, so that's your turn.

MARISHA: I just look up, and I wait for the LED stick to fall.

MATT: Correct, and you watch as it, boom, and as soon as that happens, you look over, and you see these two giant black masses, (slurping) up the wall, and one of them turns around and goes, like, and begins to move back in your direction.

SAM: (yelling)

MATT: (slurping)

LAURA: Oh god, that would be so creepy!

MARISHA: It flashes in different colors every time it goes.

LAURA: This reminds me of that Danny Elfman video that you sent. (laughter)

MATT: Hell yeah. All righty, I need you both to roll initiative.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Oh, you two.

LAURA: 15.

MARISHA: Oh, roll for initiative?

MATT: Yes.

MARISHA: I'm going to roll with my boots with this one. Seven, eight, nine, 14 total.

MATT: And you got, what was it?

LAURA: 15.

MATT: All right, so. You got it, okay. So now, Veth, your turn. You have Spider Walk on, you're on the side of the wall. The creature is starting to swirl around you. What are you going to do?

SAM: I'm aware that it's faster than me.

LAURA: How are they faster than you? (laughs)

SAM: So I'm not going to disengage. I'm just going to run up the wall.

MATT: Okay, so you're going to run up 35 feet?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: You got it. Let's do this one.

LIAM: Man, oh man.

MATT: As you dart past, it's going to go ahead and swing out with its pseudopod. (whooshes) That is a 23 to hit.

SAM: Well, it hits.

MATT: All right, you take five points of bludgeoning damage.

SAM: Yes?

MATT: And 22 points of acid damage.

SAM: I guess I'll Uncanny Dodge that.

MATT: Okay, so 22, that's 27, so that's 13 points of damage to you total. Go ahead and make another concentration check.

SAM: Not good, seven plus something.

MATT: Your feet (releasing).

SAM: Wait, oh, concentration on Spider Climb?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: That's a concentration spell?

MATT: Is it? Double check.

SAM: Totally is.

MATT: Yeah. That's what I thought.

SAM: Oh!

MATT: You suddenly, your feet (whooshes, gasps).

TRAVIS: Oh no, oh no!

MATT: And you just plummet.

SAM: Oh, jeez.

MATT: Now, the good news is you didn't get your whole 35 feet up before it hit you. It hit you as you left.

SAM: Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.

MATT: So you do fall 30 feet, right into the other slime, sploosh! (laughter)

TALIESIN: I feel like that would negate some fall damage there.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's got to, right? He just collapses?

MATT: Ooze doesn't take fall damage. It's an ooze.

TRAVIS: It's not a big air cushion like for stunt guys?

TALIESIN: No, I mean, like--

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

MATT: It does cushion your blow, so you only take six points of bludgeoning damage from the fall. However, I will say because you are impacting full-body into an acidic entity--

MARISHA: It shivers a little.

MATT: -- you will take--

TRAVIS: (fart sound)

MARISHA: (giggling)

MATT: -- 12 points of acid damage.

SAM: Damn!

MATT: And you are prone inside this creature. It's now (squelching) around you, starting to block your vision.

TALIESIN: This is so bad.

SAM: Wow, how did I get here? (laughter) This is not going well.

LIAM: Rapidly makes an air cavity that immediately poofs it out? (whooshing)

MATT: (laughs) Yep! So it's now--

TRAVIS: (fart found)

MATT: -- these creatures' turn. This one is going--

MARISHA: (laughing) He's shoving Play-Doh back into the tube.

MATT: -- down here. It can't take an action because it used its action to get down there, but it's right next to you, Jester. The other one is going to strike you. Because you are prone, it has advantage in the attack roll.

SAM: Sure, sure.

LIAM: No!

MATT: All right, that is going to be a 23 to hit.

SAM: Uh-huh, hits.

MATT: You take six points of bludgeoning damage. And... 18 points of acid damage.

SAM: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

MATT: Now, if you are prone-- let me double check.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

ASHLEY: Whoa, whoa, where we at?

SAM: I'm alive.

LIAM: Still a solid, not a liquid?

MATT: Yeah, you can still take your reaction, technically, so.

SAM: I mean, I already took a reaction.

MATT: Oh, you did, so you can't--

SAM: But I didn't actually get to take my action last turn. I started to walk, and then I fell, but I never actually took an action.

MATT: That's true, that's true, so what would you do with your action?

SAM: There's not a lot I can do from inside. I'm prone. Do I have the ability to move my arms and things?

MATT: You do.

SAM: Or am I oozed? I'm going to do the same goddamn thing and throw some more buttons up and try to hypnotize them again.

MATT: Okay, since this technically goes first, if this works, then you will not take the damage I just told you to take. So the save is wisdom, correct?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: And that's against him or both?

SAM: It says that it can do it, any creature within 30 feet.

MATT: Okay, singular creature?

SAM: Ah, sorry.

MATT: Just double-checking.

SAM: Yep, each creature in the area who sees the pattern must make a wisdom saving throw.

MATT: A 30-foot cube, okay.

SAM: So that includes my friends?

MATT: It would because you haven't seen them arrive.

SAM: Yes, yes, sure, sure, sure.

MARISHA: It's a wisdom save?

MATT: Indeed.

TALIESIN: And you can always tap them to wake them up.

MATT: They both fail. Both of you guys, roll wisdom saving throws.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

SAM: Good news, bad news.

LAURA: 27.

MARISHA: Natural one.

SAM: (laughs)

LAURA: Great!

TRAVIS: Holy shit.

LIAM: Tonight, at The Vortex.

MARISHA: So, as, yeah, a flashing LED glow stick falls, and then you throw some buttons.

MATT: The buttons explode--

MARISHA: And hypnotize me.

MATT: -- in a splash of color and light, (whooshing) like a small, localized firework, and suddenly the creatures just go limp for a moment, and Beau stands there, staring into it.

SAM: Beau's in a K-hole!

LIAM: Yeah. (laughter) Memories of Hupperdook.

MATT: (laughs) All right.

LAURA: Okay, wait, wait, wait.

MATT: That finishes their turn. We're back at the top of the initiative round. Before we get there, what's everybody else doing? You said you are?

LIAM: I grab Yasha and Fjord and just jumped as a giant eagle, so I would use.

MATT: What's the speed of the eagle?

LIAM: 80 feet.

MATT: So you can go 160 feet.

LIAM: Right, which I imagine's just a straight dive fall for most of the, and then the wings go out like a drag parachute towards the end of that run.

MATT: You got it, all righty, so you're still about a little over 100 feet above them, and since I don't have my eagle mini close to me and I can't grab right now, we're going to be using a frog. Same difference.

LIAM: Just imagine it.

MATT: Imagination, but yeah, you are currently now up in the air, trying to make your way down to join the fray with the two of them. Caduceus, what are you doing?

TALIESIN: I am sitting up there. God, what can I do? There's nothing I can, I'm too weak to go down there.

SAM and LAURA: Heal thyself!

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to take a heal.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: This is the worst foam party ever. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Yeah, just assume I'm going to heal myself.

MARISHA: Well, this was supposed to be like, a... Eh.

MATT: Okay, Jester, you're up first.

MARISHA: I was going to make a gross joke.

LAURA: I'm going to use my Ring of Spell Splitting. I'm going to cast Polymorph on Nott, on Veth, and on myself, and I'm going to turn us both into giant eagles.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Sorry, Matt.

MATT: It's okay! I, if you give me a second, I can go grab some--

LAURA: Go do it, go do it!

MATT: I'll be right back. I'm going to grab some giant eagles.

TRAVIS: This battle map brought to you by--

SAM: Oh, yeah. I threw it away, but it's Dwarven Forge something or other. Check it out at dwarvenforge.com!

TRAVIS: Can't dive by Nick--

TALIESIN: Oh, thank god!

SAM: They have, they have new things!

TALIESIN: All right, let's see.

TRAVIS: Objection!

SAM: There's objection.

MARISHA: Was that Phoenix Wright? Are these just old? (laughs)

LIAM: Old bits.

MARISHA: Old bits?

SAM: Just old bits.

LAURA: You keep freaking out.

SAM: Here's a bit I don't think I did. I don't think I ever did this bit. But it would've been real funny!

MARISHA: No, no, no, wait, you did.

MARISHA: What did you-- no?

LIAM: The eagles are coming! The eagles are coming!

MARISHA: You used that for something!

TALIESIN: Almost half my hit points, thank god.

LAURA: Yay!

SAM: (jingling)

MARISHA: I might've used some of that for Hazel Copperpot. I might have stolen some of that.

ASHLEY: That looks familiar.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: The eagles are here!

MATT: That works just fine, so.

SAM: ♪ Welcome to the Hotel California ♪

LAURA: Ooh, I'm a griffon or something!

MATT: It's more of a sphinx.

LAURA: I'm a sphinx.

MATT: You get the idea. Say for this purpose here you are right there, though, okay. Put these back here. So you are now both giant eagles.

LAURA: I'm going to-- Can I use my movement still?

MATT: You can because you only used your action.

LAURA: For my movement, can I grab Beau and lift up off the ground?

MATT: You would need your action to grab her because it is, like, a grab and then a move, so unfortunately not.

LAURA: Hoh, okay.

MARISHA: I'm okay. I'm having a great time.

MATT: She's just space raving. (laughter)

LAURA: Then I'm going to-- oh god. (laughter)

MARISHA: I don't know.

TRAVIS: Under control.

LAURA: I'm going to... fly up.

SAM: Episode title: The Quiff of Death.

LAURA: Fuck me running. I'm going to step in front of Beau.

SAM: Step?

MATT: Unfortunately, there's no space to step in front of her, because that space is occupied by the other creature.

LAURA: Then I'm just going to take my wing and bring it down in front of her.

MATT: There you go. Not my child!

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: You got it. All right, that finishes your go.

TRAVIS: Oh no. (laughter)

MATT: Beau.

MARISHA: Yeah. Yep.

TRAVIS: Get that girl some orange juice.

MARISHA: (laughs) Do you need some water?

MATT: Yeah, you're just standing there. That's your turn. Veth, you're an eagle.

SAM: I'm an eagle, but we're not allowed to pick up Beau? Is that--

LAURA: No, you can for your action.

SAM: Oh, okay, I'll go pick up Beau. Well, first I got to get out of the ooze, I guess, with my wings and stuff.

MATT: Okay, well, you know you-- (whoosh) you burst out of its space.

SAM: I just want to do it so that I don't harm the ooze. So this is a gentle lift.

MATT: Easy enough to do because it's incapacitated, no issue.

SAM: And then I will grab Beau, gently, with my razor sharp claws.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: (whining) No, I'm not ready to go. (laughter)

SAM: Oh, honey. (laughter)

MARISHA: (whining) Just 30 more minutes.

SAM: And I will fly up into the air.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Wait til this beat drops.

MARISHA: Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, this is my jam.

MATT: So with that, you can lift up the speed of the giant eagle, which is--?

SAM: Looking, looking.

LAURA: 80 feet.

SAM: Thank you.

MATT: So you're now 80 feet up. You see a giant eagle beginning to--

LIAM: We're, like, probably 30 feet apart at this point.

MATT: Yeah, you are 30 feet apart. (mini clatters) Oh god.

TRAVIS: Ah, oh, no!

SAM: Oh no!

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: Everything's over! Hold on, I got to put this plastic thing up in... this eagle cooch. Okay, there we go. (laughter)

LIAM: Wow. Wow. This is the year we reclaim our dignity. (laughter)

MATT: All righty, so...

SAM: ♪ Let the eagle soar ♪

MATT: This has been a night. (laughter)

SAM: Symbol of our country. (laughter)

MATT: There we go.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Did it.

LAURA: You did it!

MATT: That finishes Veth's turn. They can't go, because they're charmed. Just sit there.

SAM: What a weird encounter.

MATT: Yep. (laughter) All right. Caleb.

LIAM: I don't know what to make of it, because I just came rocketing down from the top, and there's birds down here.

MATT: Yeah, and you just see a giant eagle flying up, clutching Beauregard, who's just limp in its grasp. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Whoa!

MARISHA: "And there's birds down here."

LIAM: So I'm going to do my best to brake, and not smash into everybody, and I can't do anything except fly. I'm just the lift, at this point. So that's it.

MATT: Yeah, you could drop them off if you wanted to.

TRAVIS: Yasha and I are like (screaming).

MATT: If you're trying to get to the bottom, or you're staying where you are?

LIAM: Well, I'm seeing eagles come up, and I'm assuming, in my dumb eagle state, that there weren't eagles down there, so these must be my friends. So I am just going to fly down to whatever height they're at.

MARISHA: You don't know.

LIAM: That's fair, that's fair.

MATT: Okay, you can fly about 30 feet above with your movement, or you can go the full distance with your action.

LIAM: I don't want to go to the bottom, I want to stop with my eagle friends.

MATT: Got it, okay.

SAM: The only two people who can talk are Yasha and Fjord. Oh wait, and I guess Caduceus.

MATT: There is an eagle friend, and that is at 80 feet up, and that's the first one you see with Beau.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: There's a second eagle at the bottom you can barely see. It's at the very bottom. So which one are you going with? Eagle friends are at two different places.

LIAM: I will pass the first eagle friend, and go down between the two eagle friends, to try to ascertain what's going on.

MATT: All right, so you are 40 feet above, we'll say.

LIAM: There we go.

MATT: So as you're 40 feet above, holding Fjord and Yasha--

LIAM: Let's do 50 feet.

MATT: All right, 50 feet above. As you're flying there, clutching both of them, you look down, and you see these two writhing black oozes.

LIAM: (squawk)

MATT: And you see a third eagle on the bottom with its, like, wings out.

LAURA: I'm blue!

MATT: A blue eagle, if you will.

TRAVIS: "I'm blue!"

MATT: All righty, so that's your turn. Anybody else going to do anything? You guys are just being held by the giant eagle 50 feet up.

ASHLEY: Wait, wha-wha-wha-wha-wha-what is happening? Who are you f-- (sighs)

TRAVIS: Yeah, if we hit it, it'll become uncharmed, right?

LAURA and TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: We don't want to do that.

ASHLEY: But should we look around the room? There's a big white floofy thing. I wonder if we could--

LAURA: Maybe there's a doorway behind it?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: Yeah, exactly. This could be the way forward.

TALIESIN: Is that not the dead bodies that-- No, maybe not.

ASHLEY: I mean, we could try to give it a look-see, if you want to--

LIAM: (squawks)

TRAVIS: Well, how long are they charmed for?

SAM: You don't know, unfortunately.

TRAVIS: Yeah, they save every round, right? We should be trying to smoke these things, right?

ASHLEY: Here's the thing, Fjord, I can probably get us out of here.

SAM: If you see my buttons floating around, you know that those typically last a minute.

TRAVIS: Okay. (laughter)

ASHLEY: We all just die down here because we just can't leave. (laughter)

MARISHA: It puts the lotion on its skin. (laughter)

MATT: All right, so what are you guys doing? You holding?

LIAM: Waffling.

ASHLEY: Fjord, what do you want to do?

SAM: (squawks)

TRAVIS: Are we trying to get out of here, and regroup up at the top?

LAURA: Maybe.

TRAVIS: Yeah?

MARISHA: I feel weightless.

TRAVIS: Let's do that. Let's regroup at the top.

TALIESIN: I'm spending some time looking around, figuring out what the fuck is going on up there.

MATT: Make a perception check.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: Because we can send, like, fireballs down, and try to knock 'em out, you know.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I just shout out: Regroup, meet back up at the top.

SAM: It's just you and Yasha.

TALIESIN: 25.

LAURA: We can understand.

MATT: You understand.

SAM: Oh, okay.

TRAVIS: Damn eagles!

MATT: 25? Okay. Best you call tell, this chamber is collapsed enough where you cannot ascertain any other position of exit. You could do a more intense search if there was a floor, but you're having to just look from a lightless expanse, and you have no lights.

TALIESIN: I have a light.

MATT: Oh, you have light from there. So you do have a little light to see, yeah. But nothing at this distance, like, at a glance, looks like an exit.

TRAVIS: No white spider coming up behind you, right?

MATT: Jester.

TALIESIN: No, we would hear the trigger.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: You fly up?

LAURA: Sure.

MATT: All right, and so with that, Jester comes and joins the other eagles. Now you have these three eagles in this tunnel. It's a very tight space, by the way. That's as wide as the entire thing is, so you're all, like, having to carefully--

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: -- stay far away from each other, and not fuck with your flight patterns here.

TRAVIS: Going back up to the top, back up to the top!

MATT: (wings flapping) One after another, you all slowly spiral your way back up. And Caduceus, as you're sitting there looking, all of a sudden you glance down and see three massive eagles (whooshing) fly up in your space, and you have to step back because they have to perch immediately. Since there's nothing else to grab a hold onto.

TALIESIN: Since you're here, somebody should take a look at the other side of this.

LAURA: Yeah, that's what I was planning on doing, actually--

TALIESIN: Since y'all fly.

LAURA: -- is flying next to the wall, and see if I can spot any openings on the other side.

MATT: So you head over there. Make a perception check with the eagle's perception.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: And they have keen sight, which gives you an advantage, I believe.

LAURA: Keen sight, okay, what is--

LIAM: Advantage that rely on sight, yeah.

LAURA: Is that a wisdom?

LIAM: Wisdom perception.

LAURA: Wisdom? Okay.

MATT: Just go for that.

LAURA: Ooh-woo-woo. 18.

MATT: 18, looking about this area, you're hard pressed to find anything beyond the rubble.

LAURA: Okay. So it's probably at the bottom.

TRAVIS: I know we just busted out all these amazing spells to get down there and come right back up, but should we rest for a second?

LAURA: Mm.

MARISHA: Now that we know.

TALIESIN: The eagles are only going to last so long.

LIAM: A while.

TALIESIN: And if anybody with some-- doesn't have to get right up in it, we can hang from the eagles, maybe, and take shots. Stay out of the range of them.

TRAVIS: I mean, yeah, I have ranged stuff, I could do that.

TALIESIN: Ditto.

MARISHA: I could do my lightning gloves.

SAM: (squawks)

TALIESIN: Oh, you're-- yeah, never mind.

LAURA: I'll grab Fjord, and fly back down?

TRAVIS: Yeah, anybody else want to come with ranged stuff?

LAURA: So that he can shoot at them from a distance.

TRAVIS: You?

TALIESIN: I'll come.

TRAVIS: Okay. The two of us.

SAM: I'll-- yeah-- do you need a-- (squawks) (laughter)

ASHLEY: I'll hop onto Caleb.

MARISHA: Has it been a minute? Am I still hypnotized?

MATT: No, your hypnosis has now broken.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: And everyone's talking, and you're like, "What's going on?"

MARISHA: What's the plan? What do you want me to do?

TALIESIN: We're going to take distanced shots at these things. We're going to stay at least, you know--

LIAM: I'm going to land us on the lip at the top, and (whooshing) back into human form, and say: Sorry, we need to switch. (whooshing) And I turn you into a giant eagle.

MATT: So Yasha is a giant eagle.

ASHLEY: Yes!

LIAM: Yeah, and I climb on your back.

MARISHA: And then I go in front of Yasha. Take me.

TRAVIS: ♪ These broken wings ♪ (laughter)

MATT: Okay, so Yasha has Beau in one claw, and Caleb on the back, okay.

TRAVIS: And Jester's taking--

LAURA: I'll let Fjord climb on my back.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: And I'll fly down, so you can have your arms free for--

TRAVIS: Oh, I let you fly, now you let me fly.

LAURA: Yes! (squawks)

LIAM: Crisscross, crisscross.

TRAVIS: ♪ Make it jump, jump ♪

MATT: Oh, I love that movie. All righty. (intense music)

LIAM: (with the music) Ba-donk-a-donk.

TRAVIS: There better not be anymore of these on the walls on the way down.

MATT: So as you guys, now you've all got up onto it, you begin to (whooshing) fly down, and as you do, about 140 feet up the side of the cavern wall, both of them--

SAM: Oh!

MATT: Who have been broken from it are-- (glopping)

LAURA: Okay, okay.

MARISHA: Shit.

MATT: Climbing up the side.

MARISHA: I-- before we get close, I'm going to take out my gloves and (smashing) smash and turn on my lightning gloves.

MATT: You got it.

LAURA: Go, Fjord.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: (impacts)

MATT: Go ahead and roll for attack.

TRAVIS: That's a 24.

MATT: Hits.

TRAVIS: 20.

MATT: Hits.

TRAVIS: And a 28.

MATT: Hits! All against a single target?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: All right, go for it.

TRAVIS: That is 10 plus five, 15. 14, so 24, and seven for 30-- What was I going to say? 31.

MATT: 31 points of force damage to it. (crashing) As it impacts, you see little bits splattering off of it. It's still-- momentum is carrying as it's climbing up the sides. So it shrugs it off. It hits, but it's still moving.

TRAVIS: Copy.

MATT: That finishes your go. What are you doing?

MARISHA: I'm going to just pop, pop. I'm going to hit it with my lightning gloves.

MATT: You got it.

MARISHA: Okay, that first one is a 26 to hit, and a 16. 26 and 16.

MATT: Both hit. On the same one that Fjord's going after, or the other one?

MARISHA: I'll do the other one.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Terrible damage rolls. 10 damage and 11 damage.

MATT: 10 damage and 11 damage, all right. You got it. So those two attacks, bolts fire out and pummel on the side. You watch as the lightning (sucking) doesn't do quite as much damage as you'd hope. Also, you watch as it quivers, (wobbling, tearing) and splits into two smaller black oozes.

SAM: What?

LAURA: Does lightning do that?

MARISHA: I don't know. (laughter)

MATT: So now there are these two.

SAM: She's done.

MARISHA: Fuck.

MATT: And that there.

MARISHA: Just let me be high again. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Bring out the rave!

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: You still have your bonus action.

MARISHA: I still have my bonus action? I guess it didn't do as much damage as I thought? Like it's resistant?

MATT: Possibly.

LIAM: How close are we saying we are to these things? If you were doing that, that's like 10 or 15 feet away?

MATT: 20 feet away, yeah.

LIAM: 20 feet away.

MARISHA: I have a range of 20 feet with my gloves, so it can't be more than that.

LIAM: Okay, okay.

MARISHA: I might as well hit it again, I guess. Pop pop.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: A natural 20, and a natural 19.

MATT: Both hit.

MARISHA: Okay, so--

TRAVIS: You crit on 19s, too?

MARISHA: I don't crit on 19s, no. No, that's your cool barbarian thing. For the natural 20, I rolled a seven on that damage, so 14 plus six is 20 damage.

MATT: 20 damage, nice.

MARISHA: And then on the 19, a two plus six, so eight damage on the 19.

MATT: All righty. Got it, so (punching). The two additional hits slam into it, doing damage, but you see it seems to be absorbing a portion of the lightning impact.

MARISHA: Do those split in half? No.

MATT: Is this all against one or both?

MARISHA: Just the one. Oh, I shouldn't have reminded him.

MATT: It's okay.

TRAVIS: You fool.

MATT: That should be plenty now.

LIAM: Fly, you fools.

SAM: Is anyone riding me right now?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: You have Caduceus.

SAM: I mean sexually. Okay, good. (laughter)

MATT: The one that you hit splits in two more, smaller.

SAM: Ugh.

MATT: So now there are four.

SAM: Triplets.

MARISHA: I don't know, is it me? Is it me, I don't know?

TRAVIS: And just to clarify, when I hit him with the Eldritch Blast, they didn't split, right?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: I might need to just stop being.

LIAM: Yeah, I think it's the electricity.

LAURA: It's lighting, don't lightning.

TRAVIS: ♪ Save a horse, ride an eagle ♪ (laughter)

LIAM: Can I step in?

MATT: You can.

LIAM: Okay, I will slap guano and sulfur together, and do a 5th-Level Fireball, and I will huck it 10 to 15 feet below them, so that it erupts upward, and tickles their gooch.

MATT: You got it, and as such, fire on their gooches.

TRAVIS: Rad.

MATT: Fail. Fail. Fail. Fail, yeah, they got to roll a 20 to even to get close.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: 34.

LAURA: On all of them?

LIAM: *Ja**.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Wow.

LAURA: That's good.

MATT: Both of the small ones that just split--

LAURA and SAM: Yay!

MATT: -- incinerate immediately.

LAURA: Oh, so it's a good thing!

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: That you split them in half.

MARISHA: Yeah, I did amazingly.

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Big favor.

TRAVIS: Yep, big time.

MARISHA: Yeah, I think it's good. I don't know, I have no idea.

MATT: The other one looks-- it's barely holding on, as it's like (wet sucking) making its way up there.

TRAVIS: Is it making a sound like, "Ah!"?

LIAM, LAURA, and MARISHA: ♪ Making it's way ♪

MATT: Yep, exactly like that.

TALIESIN: I'm going to hit it with a Sacred Flame, if I could. That's a--

MATT: Wisdom save?

TALIESIN: Dex save.

MATT: Dex save.

LIAM: ♪ Is this feeling ♪

MATT: That is a 16.

TALIESIN: It does not save its dex save.

MATT: Nope! Got a natural 19, minus three.

TALIESIN: Ooh, 18 points of radiant damage.

MATT: On which one?

TALIESIN: The one that just got hit.

MATT: That'd be that one there?

TALIESIN: Yeah, on the one that's looking rough.

MATT: That one burns away, the body turning to black ash that falls and begins to scatter into the little bit of air dissipating into the floor below.

LAURA: Into the rave.

TALIESIN: We don't need to be close, by the way. You've got room to move.

MATT: It's now an ash rave.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: All righty, that finishes your go. I'll say, Veth?

SAM: Oh, I mean, you attacked already, right?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: We're trying to stay rangy, right?

TALIESIN: I've got 60 feet of range with this.

SAM: Then I'll just hover so that-- You're staying up?

TALIESIN: Yeah, we can stay 50 feet away.

SAM: Okay, great.

TALIESIN: I did say that, I was like: You can, about 50 feet's good.

SAM: (squawks)

MATT: I'll say it moves up at an angle to get within range of Caleb on the back of the eagle. As it is a large creature, it fits out 10 feet from the side, with a five-foot range. So it gets one swing at you on the back.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: That is a nine. (laughter)

LIAM: (yelps)

TALIESIN: Hard to hit when you're hanging from an eagle.

MATT: Indeed. So that finishes its turn. Back to the top of the round. Really, at this point, who wants to go next?

TALIESIN: Hard to dodge when you're swinging from a snake.

MARISHA: At this point, who wants to go next?

TRAVIS: I'll send Eldritch Blasts its way.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: 20.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: A 20.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: And-- ew, a 13. No, yeah, 13.

LIAM: Just two 20s? Pathetic.

MATT: Hits.

TRAVIS: The 13 hit, too? (mumbles excitedly)

MATT: Its AC is seven.

TRAVIS: Aww.

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: It's a ooze.

TALIESIN: Not hard to hit a puddle.

LAURA: I'm starting to feel bad for this ooze, you know? It was just chilling.

LIAM: Take him to the tower.

MARISHA: He was living his best life.

TRAVIS: 31 points of force damage.

MARISHA: He just wanted to be a part of an Irish B&B.

MATT: You hit it with one, and as it does, it impacts the actual ice and stone, and it starts falling off the wall.

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: The two others impact, and you watch it just (squishing), and just explode out, as it smatters and sprays on the nearby walls, leaving this black trail that hisses as burns down the stone. And with that, combat comes to an end.

LAURA: I do a barrel roll down to the bottom.

MATT: Awesome.

MARISHA: Do a barrel roll.

LIAM: Do a barrel roll.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's with m-- ah!

MATT: Yeah, you are brought along for that, Fjord.

TRAVIS: Ah!

MATT: Feeling good about that as you scream all the way to the bottom.

TRAVIS: (growing fainter) We had an understanding!

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: We did it.

TALIESIN: Your vomit would freeze by the time it gets down. It'll come down like powdered rain.

TRAVIS: (groans)

LAURA: We did it.

TALIESIN: Brown powdered rain.

TRAVIS: Dry oatmeal.

LAURA: We should definitely rest.

TRAVIS: Yes, we should.

ASHLEY: (squawk)

LAURA: (squawk)

TRAVIS: Let's make sure there are no other tricks on this floor.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Or entrances or exits, though, just in case.

SAM: I'm going to drop Caduceus, and then use my eagle eye vision. Can I see in the dark? I have no idea.

TALIESIN: Well, it's not dark, because I've got a light up.

SAM: Oh, that's right.

LIAM: And there's daylight in here.

TALIESIN: Take a look around.

SAM: I'm going to look around the bottom.

MARISHA: And still a rainbow LED.

SAM: I'm looking specifically for a dagger.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a perception check on that.

LAURA: I'm clawing at that ice chunk to see if there's anything underneath it.

SAM: I need it.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm in eagle form still.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm taking a look around with my natural, "Huh." Huh.

TRAVIS: Huh.

MATT: Okay, looking for anything specific?

TALIESIN: Something odd, out of place.

MATT: Make a perception check.

MARISHA: My natural "huh."

TALIESIN: My natural "huh."

MATT: 19?

SAM: 19.

MATT: As you peek around, it takes you about two minutes or so, but you do find the dagger that you threw. As it slid down, it (tinging) off the wall--

MARISHA: A two and a one?

MATT: -- and got itself wedged between two stones.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: But you do find it, thankfully, because the light gleams off the metal from certain angles, and you-- that's the one.

TALIESIN: 21.

MATT: 21?

TALIESIN: Mm.

MATT: Okay. And you're clawing away at that one there?

TALIESIN: I may find gold, don't know.

MATT: So you're keeping an eye out, keeping an eye out.

LAURA: (scratching)

MATT: You carve away at the ice right there. Once it begins to break away, you uncover a small opening that was hidden behind it.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: You peer at it, and it's not completely encased, but it was blocked from view unless you went to the side, and as you break down that chunk of ice wall there, it exposes this one particular exit.

MARISHA: Good work.

LIAM: You are an eagle for another 55 minutes. Is there anything that you've ever wanted to do?

ASHLEY: (squawks)

TRAVIS: That's it?

ASHLEY: (squawks)

MATT: You can check that off the list. (laughter)

SAM: Scientists have allowed her to make one sound. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Ah! (laughter)

TRAVIS: That's a pretty good one, actually.

TALIESIN: That was really good. (laughter)

LAURA: I'm going to drop my eagle form.

SAM: Ah!

MATT: Okay, so you drop your eagle form. All right, so we have one more eagle. The eagle will not fit through this opening, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: I'll also say, I can burn a 10-minute spell, and give us a little bit of cushion, or we can take a short rest.

TRAVIS: Short rest.

LAURA: Yeah, let's rest here.

LIAM: Wait, show me your wings. Splay them out.

ASHLEY: (flapping)

LIAM: Look at the little lines of black lightning, along the inside of the wings.

LAURA: Ooh.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's very clever.

LIAM: That was not an accident.

ASHLEY: I do a shiver so I get really floofy. You know how they get like (poof)?

LAURA: A little shiver quiff?

ASHLEY: A little shiver quiff. (laughter) I do a little--

MATT: Eagles, too.

ASHLEY: -- a little shiver quiff, and then--

TRAVIS: (fart sound)

ASHLEY: -- you know how birds get little, you know, really fluffy.

SAM: ♪ Quiff of the week. ♪ (laughter)

MATT: Awesome. Most metal eagle ever. (laughter)

LIAM: And I bring her back.

SAM: Are we allowed to drop our form? How does this work?

LIAM: I can do it.

LAURA: You can just drop it.

SAM: Okay, all right, I will drop the form.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: That was fun.

LAURA: So we're taking a short rest here?

TRAVIS: Yes, please.

LIAM: *Ja**.

LAURA: An hour, just chilling?

MATT: Okay, so you can take a short rest. Get spells back that you've spent, for those who get them back on a short rest.

TRAVIS: Please.

MATT: You can spin your hit dice to heal up. And anything else you'd like to do to recoup during this time period.

LIAM: Arcane recovery.

MARISHA: Caduceus, are you going to do anything fancy before I spend hit dice?

TALIESIN: No, it's better to spend hit dice.

MARISHA: I'm going to spend hit dice.

TALIESIN: I can do stuff later.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Ooh!

TALIESIN: Let me see how this works.

TRAVIS: Three hit dice. ♪ GIF of the week! ♪

LAURA: Oy.

LIAM: D&D homework, D&D homework.

LAURA: Whoa, why can't I roll like that when we're doing damage?

ASHLEY: I know, I was just thinking the same.

MATT: It's how it works.

TRAVIS: That's it. It's because you want it too much. Got to let it go. Be like water.

LAURA: How.

LIAM: Damn it.

MARISHA: 10. (laughs)

TALIESIN: Yep, that'll do it.

MARISHA: 16, okay.

LIAM: Two.

LAURA: Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! Woo! 69 points.

MATT: Nice.

TRAVIS: Appropriate.

LAURA: I guess I didn't need that many.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: What, what, what?

SAM: Nothing.

TRAVIS: Are you still hurting pretty bad?

SAM: No, I'm good.

TRAVIS: Okay.

SAM: All back to normal.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: One more, one more.

TALIESIN: Are you okay?

SAM: Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.

MARISHA: I'm going to do one more.

SAM: I'm totally full.

TALIESIN: All right.

MARISHA: A one? Fucking what? Why?

LIAM: Hey, can I check out those bodies?

MATT: You may, make an investigation check.

MARISHA: Good enough, I'm going to stop there.

LIAM: 20.

MATT: All right, just like Nott had discovered earlier, the bodies were rolled, but you didn't know this at the time. Yeah, aside from their shredded clothing, and heavy furs, and their ruined armor from falling into this space, and being broken. They're in pretty rough shape. Anything that was of worth on them appears to have already been picked clean.

LIAM: They got gooed?

MATT: They got gooed.

SAM: Well, Fjord, I forgive you for dropping the rope, and sending me to my doom.

TRAVIS: That was my fault, I apologize. I thought you would just do your nimble stuff, and it would be no big deal.

SAM: You had faith in me.

TRAVIS: I did.

SAM: That's flattering.

TRAVIS: I didn't mean to put Caduceus' life ahead of yours.

SAM: No, no, that was a wise decision.

TALIESIN: I appreciate the faith that you have in her. I mean, misplaced faith in this particular situation-- (laughter)

TALIESIN: -- but very healthy. Very healthy.

SAM: I mean, there was nothing I could do. As soon as I landed, they were on top of me. I was--

TRAVIS: Just minding your own?

SAM: I just was minding my own business.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: They jumped me.

TALIESIN: Insight check.

SAM: (laughs)

TALIESIN: 14.

SAM: What do I do?

TALIESIN: You can roll against it, if you like?

MATT: Make a deception check, yeah.

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: Deception.

SAM: Ooh, eight.

TALIESIN: Right. (laughter)

MATT: Remember, you can't roll lower than a 10, but you don't have proficiency at it.

SAM: Deception, I can.

MATT: That's right. Yes, you can. (laughter) Because you are not proficient with that.

TALIESIN: All right, all right.

LIAM: I doused the driftglobe, but all this conversation is happening in the light of the celebone stick.

TALIESIN: No, I've got Light up.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm, it is.

LAURA: And a fire.

TALIESIN: Oh, that too, yeah.

TRAVIS: And the sword, and everything.

ASHLEY: (beatboxing)

LIAM: The pulse is still going.

MARISHA: How does the celebone stick work, again?

LAURA: I'm just going to rave dance for my break.

TRAVIS: Boots and pants, and boots and pants.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'm going to--

ASHLEY: (beatboxing)

MARISHA: -- just, you know, do a little twirly with the stick in my hand, you know?

TRAVIS: Oh, slow it down.

MATT: Sure, yeah, go for it.

LAURA: Nice, nice.

MARISHA: How long does it last? Can I reuse the stick? Is it, like, battery operated? Can I charge it at the end of the night?

LIAM: AA batteries.

MATT: I will answer all those questions right now.

TALIESIN: USB 3.

MATT: The effect lasts until deactivated, or one hour has passed.

MARISHA: Oh, I'll deactivate it, and save it.

MATT: Well, it can't be used again until after the next dawn.

MARISHA: Aww.

LAURA: But you can use it tomorrow.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: Don't worry, Beau, I've got, like, 10 celebone sticks!

MARISHA: Hell yeah! I'll put it away.

LAURA: I hold them between my fingers like Wolverine.

MARISHA: Save my battery for my rave stick.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

TALIESIN: Oh, it's over.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: Shall we?

SAM: Yes, please.

LIAM: Please.

MATT: All right, so you've taken your short rest. The small, low-hanging entrance to this next hallway, it looks like, is before you. What's the order you are traveling?

LAURA: Oh god.

TRAVIS: We take turns. Beau, you're up, go for it.

MARISHA: What? Okay.

LAURA: Beau can't see in the dark.

MARISHA: I take Veth, and I shove Veth forward. With my goggles. I still want those back.

SAM: Do you want them back?

MARISHA: I do want those back.

SAM: Right now, or like--

MARISHA: No, you should-- you scout.

SAM: Scouting! Looking for traps!

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: Searching ahead.

TRAVIS: Should we put a rope around Veth?

MARISHA: She's fine.

SAM: Ah, I'm fine.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Or a bell.

MATT: Are you stealthing your way in?

MARISHA: One of those kid leashes.

SAM: Sure, I'll stealth in.

MATT: Make a stealth check, please.

MARISHA: Little bear backpack.

SAM: Tons, a million, 30-something.

MATT: Okay, jesus, fucking rogues. All right, so--

LIAM: I think I'll do a rogue again next campaign.

MATT: Pushing through the small opening, you find a partial hallway that is also interrupted by the previous collapse. You are entering from the side of it; this is not part of the initial structure. This pit that unveiled through some sort of an impact, upon its collision with this part of the city, this Aeor ruin. You enter a hallway into the right. It is mostly fallen in about 15 or 20 feet down to the right side. The left continues on. It is not lit, but you have your goggles on.

SAM: Uh-huh, *my** goggles.

MATT: So you continue down that path, keeping, carefully as you can, and you see the faint orange glow as two, it looks like, light-emitting orbs are affixed to two sides of the wall.

SAM: I will scan around for some traps and tripwires, and look at those for...

MATT: Make an investigation check.

SAM: 23.

MATT: 23. You look around, nothing trap-related catches your eye.

SAM: Nothing trap-related. Oh boy. (sighs)

TRAVIS: Yeah, it's loaded.

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: I'll run by.

MATT: As you run past the middle of these two orange spheres that are glowing, nothing happens.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's the shit, right there!

TALIESIN: It's going to wait to hit me. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Caduceus, you feel...

TALIESIN: Nothing.

LIAM: She's too short.

MARISHA: Why?

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MATT: You see another set about 20 feet ahead of you, and you vaguely see in the distance, another set. Like these are occasional marks of lighting throughout this lengthened hallway.

TALIESIN: Oh.

LIAM: I'm going to talk into a wire and just say: All good, are we all good?

SAM: So far so good, yes. Please, come, follow.

LIAM: Yeah?

SAM: Save my life.

LIAM: I slip into the hole. She wants us to come.

MARISHA: All right.

MATT: Who's after Caleb?

ASHLEY: I'll go after Caleb.

MARISHA: I'll go.

MATT: You move two at a time in this chamber. It's wide enough for two folks, so...

MARISHA: Okay, good.

SAM: ♪ Two by two! ♪

MATT: Beau and Caleb, followed by?

TALIESIN: We'll go.

MARISHA: ♪ Orlando! ♪

MATT: All right, Yasha and Caduceus, and then Fjord, and Jester in the rear. Okay, cool.

TRAVIS: (slapping)

TALIESIN: Break up the clerics.

TRAVIS: High five me. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Fuck.

LAURA: Sorry, I was--

MATT: (claps) There you go.

LAURA: I was worried about those orbs, Fjord, I'm sorry.

MATT: Continuing on-- (laughter) - for about 150 or so feet, the hall is just one long, straight shot. The sides of it are fairly simple. You see a little bit of inset stone in rectangular shapes, but it lack the detail and beautiful artistic scrolling that the first chambers you entered had. This is more of a utility hallway. It's about that point that you see something on the ground ahead. It's beyond one of the orange globe positions, so you don't get much light other then the faint backlight of the next set beyond it. It looks like something piled in the middle of the chamber.

SAM: Look, up on the ground ahead. (laughter) I'll cast Mage Hand and poke it.

MATT: It moves slightly with the impact of the Mage Hand, but--

SAM: Like, pull-- is it cloth? What is it?

MATT: You tug at one point and you see something move, like an arm.

LAURA: (sighs) It's a body.

MARISHA: A pile of bodies, okay.

MATT: When it does hit, it has a wet sound. (wet thud)

SAM: Ooh, fresh.

TRAVIS: How far away are we?

MATT: From where you are right now? I'd say, roughly, 50 or so feet.

TRAVIS: I'll use Divine Sense, just in case.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm going to keep an eye behind us for a second.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Any celestial, fiend, or undead within 60 feet?

MATT: No. Looking back, nothing seems to be following.

TALIESIN: All right.

SAM: All right, I'll scoot up to it, and see if it's a trap.

MATT: As you get closer--

SAM: Oh, boy.

MATT: You can now see with the faint bit of light, the walls surrounding this odd pile in the middle are smeared with blood. Liquid blood, not frozen. And the temperature in here, itself, is a little warmer, but it's fresher. And you get a glance at the pile here, and there are bodies, multiple bodies, lying in different positions, leaned against the wall and slumped over, some that are just face down on the ground, others looking upward, limbs just akimbo.

SAM: Any sign of death? I mean, cause of death?

MATT: Oh, you can go ahead and inspect, if you want to make a medicine check.

SAM: I would like to inspect.

TRAVIS: Are his ears and mouth bleeding?

SAM: Uh, 30.

MATT: 30 medicine check?

SAM: Oh, medicine? No, no, god, no. Natural 20. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Wow.

MATT: Adding your wisdom save.

SAM: One. (laughs)

MATT: 21, yeah, that'll do. So you do notice, as you get close, these bodies are all wearing thick traveling attire for the weather, similar to what you have. Though you recognize the clothing as Dynasty in make and style. So this is Kryn in history.

LAURA: The same group of the guy that was frozen up top.

MATT: Two drow, a human, a goblin, and two orcs.

LIAM: Oh, that's so...

MARISHA: Wait, two drow.

TRAVIS: A goblin, an orc.

MARISHA: A human, a goblin, and two orcs.

MATT: Six bodies total.

LIAM: Makes sense for a party from the Dynasty.

MARISHA: Six bodies total, one more body if we count the guy upstairs.

LAURA: Like, this lookout up top.

MARISHA: It's us.

LAURA: What?

MARISHA: Well, just, like, one, two, three, four...

LIAM: There's nine of us.

SAM: There's nine of us, yeah.

TRAVIS: It's the Sun Tree.

MATT: This is not The Sun Tree.

MARISHA: No, no, no, I just, yeah.

SAM: The goblin looks like me. (laughter)

TRAVIS: That red thread's looking real hard to snag onto something. (laughs)

MARISHA: It must be.

MATT: You do notice, with that roll, the bodies are not that old. Maybe a week or less.

SAM: Slashed, bludgeoned?

MATT: A mix of stab and slash wounds.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay.

LAURA: Would I be able to tell with a medicine check--? Oh no, you just rolled a medicine check.

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay.

TALIESIN: Blood to body ratio on the outside, does it seem like... How much blood is out versus how much would have been in these people? Like, is this the normal amount of blood? I mean, or does it seem--

MATT: It doesn't seem copious. This isn't a Nightmare on Elm Street scene.

TALIESIN: Sure, but like, is there less then there should be, I suppose? I feel like I might know that.

MATT: Make a medicine check.

TRAVIS: It's the same day, so I can't do See Invisibility.

TALIESIN: 28.

MATT: 28, it looks about standard.

TALIESIN: Okay. Yeah, I'm keeping an eye out, by the way. This is freaking me out.

TRAVIS: These bodies are piled. Is there an end to chamber that's behind them, at all?

MATT: The hallway continues.

TRAVIS: It just continues.

LAURA: What's above the bodies?

MATT: The top of the hall itself is no more than maybe four or five feet from Caduceus' head. A total of, you know, 11, 12, at its height, and it's just a long hallway.

MARISHA: Do the bodies look deliberately piled? Or like something happened?

MATT: Roll an investigation check?

LIAM: Yeah, is it a skirmish? I'll assist, because I want to know if it's a skirmish.

MARISHA: You're going to assist?

LIAM: Or did they get Tetsuoed in the hallway?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TALIESIN: Or if they were just dropped there.

MARISHA: All right. 28.

MATT: 28. This was a skirmish. The blood splatter, the positioning of the bodies. A fight happened in this hallway, and this group was butchered. Not necessarily like-- Well-- hard to say they're butchered, they were killed, but it doesn't look like they were just completely annihilated. They had weapons ready, they were armed for combat.

MARISHA: They were an adventuring party, yeah.

MATT: To some degree. You have no idea what their purpose was here, but they're all left here dead from this scuffle.

TRAVIS: We're thinking Molly's working with the Dynasty in some way?

LAURA: No, I think they ambushed a Dynasty group that was already--

LIAM: No, competing group.

MARISHA: You mentioned--

TALIESIN: We should check the bodies.

MARISHA: -- slash wounds and stab wounds? Is that what you said?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: We all ready knew that the Dynasty was trying for the same thing that DeRogna was.

TRAVIS: Picked clean like the other bodies have been, or because it seems like liquid blood, not as picked over?

MATT: I'll say you go ahead and check through the bodies, and other than their weapons that have been left at the side, and their ruined armor, most anything of worth has been picked clean.

TALIESIN: I'm going to get them going, so I'm going to start the Decompose. Let them start rotting.

MARISHA: Well, Caduceus--

MATT: Fungus begins to take ahold.

TALIESIN: Hm?

MATT: Fungus begins to take hold rather rapidly.

TALIESIN: Yeah, take a little while.

MARISHA: While Caduceus is doing that, I'm just going to talk at him over his shoulder. Do you have anything that might help against mental or psychic dam-- damage?

TRAVIS: Uh-oh.

MARISHA: (burp) Sorry. Sorry, it's really cold.

LAURA: The smell, it's the smell.

MARISHA: It's just real gross.

TALIESIN: I don't know. Not today, I don't think. Other than-- I can do it for a minute at a time, but I can't do anything else.

MARISHA: A minute at a time?

TALIESIN: A minute at a time, I can give you a little pep. Just a little, not a lot. I don't have anything that's great, not right now. Tomorrow.

MARISHA: Tomorrow.

TRAVIS: And this hallway that extends, the same sort of dual beacons of light, just into the distance?

MATT: Yep.

TRAVIS: How far-- Does it extend quite a distance until visual acuity gives out, or does it seem like--?

MATT: It's been that way for a while. It does look like... it has-- in the next four or five sets from where you are, it seems to stop.

TRAVIS: The light does? Interesting.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: How did all these other guys get through without fighting those oozes? (laughs)

TRAVIS: Good question. Should keep going. Also, didn't you have to chop through, like, a big thing of ice to get here?

LAURA: They probably put the ice there.

MATT: Well, the ice wasn't--

LIAM: It was obscuring it.

MATT: It was obscuring it, it wasn't actually blocked.

LIAM: You just went to town on it.

LAURA: Ah.

TRAVIS: Plus, it looked like it had been a week, so maybe it was formed--

ASHLEY: Do any of the bodies that we've seen, any of them look even remotely familiar, or just random?

MATT: Looking over them, no, not really.

MARISHA: And are they all just drow, or various Dynasty folk?

LAURA: Two orcs, a goblin...

MARISHA: Oh, right, we answered this question.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, we did.

TRAVIS: We should keep going. (laughter)

MARISHA: We should, yeah.

TRAVIS: We're coming back around.

MARISHA: Getting in the loops, yep.

LAURA: Let's go.

LIAM: Our friend is waiting.

TRAVIS: Veth, do you want to take point?

SAM: Don't I?

TALIESIN: I do have a Locate Creature, when it comes time for it.

LAURA: You do?

TALIESIN: I do, and I'll also say, did you-- just in case, do you have a Word of Recall? Just in case?

LAURA: Let's see if I prepared that one today. I feel like I did. Looks like I didn't. (laughs)

SAM: Oh, boy.

TALIESIN: Oh, boy.

SAM: Well...

TALIESIN: I have one of those, too. Okay, so that's the spell I'm not going to use, unless a bunch of people are already dead.

MARISHA: Well, does anyone with magic have anything that can help us against psychic damage?

TRAVIS: Nope.

TALIESIN: No.

MARISHA: Just curious after encountering two corpses with blood coming out of their eyes, and horrible expressions on their faces.

TALIESIN: I have--

LAURA: But these guys--

TALIESIN: -- Bless.

TRAVIS: But these guys are tore up.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Because... M-moll-- Lucian, we're assuming, killed Vess DeRogna by himself?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: But he also--

LAURA: Oh, that's why.

SAM: I mean, if they are of the same order this Nine Eyes Order, maybe they know each other's weaknesses.

TALIESIN: And the element of surprise.

MARISHA: But we saw that drow at the top of this excavation site that looked just like Vess, and he didn't have any eyes tattooed on him. If they died the same way, because Lucian can just--

LAURA: Give them a vision, or overwhelm their brains.

MARISHA: Or do something. Right, right. How are we supposed to compete against that? He killed a member of the Cerberus Assembly by himself.

LIAM: We are at a disadvantage. Nothing has changed.

LAURA: I didn't prepare Word of Recall because Vess said that teleporting in these areas would be really, really dangerous, so I thought that would be a bad idea.

TALIESIN: I got a thing I might be able to do.

TRAVIS: (chuckles)

TALIESIN: Fair point, we'll remember that for next time. Figured teleporting out is easier than teleporting in.

TRAVIS: Let's go, let's go.

MARISHA: Yeah, keep going.

TALIESIN: Next time, I got an idea. Just in case.

SAM: I'll take the point again, and keep going down the same hallway.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: If it comes to it.

TRAVIS: Should we be checking the hallways for hidden doors, and just normal shit?

SAM: Just run your sword along the sides as we go.

MARISHA: Just run your fingers along the wall.

TRAVIS: I'll take one side, you take the other.

MARISHA: All right, deal.

TALIESIN: I'll keep my eyes open.

MATT: Okay. Continuing on, running your hands along both sides of the hall as you progress forward, eventually you pass the fifth, fourth, third, second, and final set of lights. And at that final set of lights, the hall comes to an end. There before you, you see a single, rusted, iron door. It has no handles. It has no knobs. It has no break in the middle of it. It's just a solid iron slab of different material than the rest of the hallway, but it does have crossbars, and it seems to resemble a door in its construction, and it blocks your passage. What you do notice, is there is an empty shelf, not dissimilar to the pillars that you encountered in that previous chamber, though it is wider and further back. Looks like it's about six inches tall, and about a foot wide. Like, a little slot.

LIAM: Are there--

MARISHA: In the door?

MATT: In the door.

LIAM: Is there any sort of etching or pattern in the way Beauregard encountered?

MATT: You go ahead and glance inside. It looks like the entire interior is covered in etching and various types of arcane glyphs, sigils, and variation of Draconic, in the same sort of ancient script that you've seen in other elements of Aeorian reference. But as opposed to just seeing the one at the bottom, the entirety of the interior is just one massive network of arcane script.

TALIESIN: Does the arcane script mean anything? Does it say anything?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

LAURA: Guidance because you're looking.

LIAM: Also, I pull out one of my last two pearls, all that's left is the black one, and place it to my own head, and take a moment to cast a little dunamancy.

MATT: All righty.

LIAM: So Guidance. (sighs) Terrible, terrible. Guidance is a d4? 20 total.

MATT: 20 total.

SAM: Hey, not terrible.

MATT: The essence of this seems to be some sort of an Abjuration-type nexus, but it is an incomplete glyph, and both the top and the bottom of it seem to direct towards the empty space in the middle of the shelf. Best you can ascertain, it requires something to complete the connection.

TRAVIS: (buzzing movement)

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, your arm.

LAURA: But it's a rectangle shape?

MATT: Yes, it's a little slot, about six inches tall and about a foot wide.

LIAM: Is it a Gom Jabbar?

MARISHA: Okay, wait, six inches...

MATT: Six inches high, and about a foot wide.

ASHLEY: In the middle of the...

MATT: In the middle of the iron door.

TRAVIS: No blood, dried blood on the ground, on the door, anywhere?

MATT: Glancing around here, make an investigation check.

TRAVIS: 19.

MATT: 19. Looking around, inspecting the area, looking at the inside, checking the floor around. Doesn't appear to be any signs of dried blood.

SAM: So it requires something to complete it, but we don't know if that's something like blood, or magic? Like, it could be magic?

MARISHA: What's the root of the glyph? Do we understand the root of the glyph?

LIAM: Catalyst.

LAURA: He was saying, like, Abjuration.

MATT: It's Abjuration, sort of.

LIAM: Protection, a ward, keeping us out.

MARISHA: Protection.

TRAVIS: Same low ceiling that we were in in the hallway, about four feet above Caduceus' head? Width of the hallway is still the same. It's just this door.

MATT: Correct, it's just been one continuous long, straight hallway.

MARISHA: Protection.

TALIESIN: Nothing's pinged your emergency wire, either?

LIAM: I mean, yeah, it would have mentally dinged.

TALIESIN: Bodies had all their arms, right?

MATT: Yes. Or, at least, all their arms were present.

LAURA: Is there dust on the ground, or anything like that? Can we see, like, footprints and stuff that isn't ours on the ground, at all?

MATT: There isn't a whole lot of dust in this chamber because there isn't a lot of traffic anymore. It's hard to really tell, I'd say.

LIAM: I want to go back for one of those bodies.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Oh.

LAURA: What?

TALIESIN: Darn, we, yeah...

SAM: What?

LAURA: What, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: We have an arm with a tattoo.

SAM: We do?

LAURA: (gasps)

SAM: We also have a head.

LAURA: We have Vess DeRogna's body.

LIAM: Well--

TALIESIN: Let's try one of the normal ones first.

LIAM: Yeah, let's try something else first.

SAM: We have a head that you chopped off.

LIAM: I also thought of that, but I just didn't want to take time to--

LAURA: But Vess DeRogna's body has the tattoos on it.

LIAM: -- take everything out and put everything back. So let's just grab a person.

TALIESIN: I'll help you.

LIAM: Thank you.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: We're going to go back for a body.

MATT: Which of the corpses do you want?

LIAM: It was?

MATT: Two orcs, two drow, a goblin, and a human.

LIAM: I'll grab a drow.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Any of them have tattoos on their arm?

MATT: You take a glace over them. Nothing beyond ornamental elements. Nothing that seems to be in line with what you were referring to.

TALIESIN: Well, all right.

LIAM: But as we're walking back. This is good, it's due diligence, but I think you're right. So we'll bring the corpse there, and we'll experiment with a hand.

MATT: Okay. You place the hand in there. No reaction.

TRAVIS: Just as a note, Beau, I do have Heroism, which, if I cast at a 5th-level, it makes creatures immune to being frightened, and you gain temporary hit points equal to your spell casting mod. So it's like four people, five people. Not much, but...

ASHLEY: Do you still have Molly's vial of blood?

LAURA: Did we end up getting that?

TALIESIN: We should, actually.

LAURA: Yeah, we do, we have Molly's blood.

MATT: You do. All the vials are less then they were when you gave them, but you do have some.

MARISHA: Is there any other markings around? So we have this glyph that's Abjuration. Anything else that's indicative around it?

MATT: Nope, it's just looks like an iron door surrounding it.

TRAVIS: And you think it needs to be something with Abjuration? Like, the symbols indicate Abjuration?

LAURA: What if they have the symbol on their wrist, one of the Nine Eyes.

TRAVIS: Well, I have Armor of Agathys, which is ice.

LIAM: I'm going to sit on the ground, and place my necklace on the ground, and I'm going to say: Una. Which makes it all (whooshing).

MATT: Okay, all the contents (whooshing) fill the bottom of the middle of this hallway, including the body of DeRogna.

LIAM: Yeah, DeRogna's here. I grab her underneath her armpits, and drag her over to this thing.

TALIESIN: I help.

LIAM: And take her hand, and stick it in.

MATT: No reaction.

LAURA: (groans)

LIAM: Hm.

MARISHA: Wait, flip it around, though. Try it this way. That's where the tattoo is.

MATT: It's front and back.

MARISHA: Oh, never mind.

LAURA: It's a card reader.

MARISHA: I just didn't know, like, if you're checking a passport, you know?

LIAM: How big is it?

MATT: Six inches tall, a foot wide, and about a foot in depth.

SAM: Magic. Abjuration magic.

MARISHA: Yeah, Abjuration, try it.

ASHLEY: Wait, Abjuration is what, again?

TRAVIS: Like, protective stuff.

ASHLEY: Protective stuff.

TALIESIN: I think it means it is a protective spell, not that protective spells open it.

MARISHA: But that burns your shit?

TRAVIS: No, I mean, it's a 1st-level spell. I can try it. Let's be honest, I don't use a ton of those. Want me to try it?

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: All right, I'll cast Armor of Agathys on myself at 1st-level.

MATT: Okay, like, standing at the door?

SAM: Well, do you have to direct it into the hole?

LIAM: Probably got to put your hand in and dump.

MARISHA: And then do it?

LIAM: I have Shield, too. I can do it at level one.

LAURA: Or is it a self?

TRAVIS: Surrounds me, manifesting as a spectral frost that covers me and my gear.

MARISHA: Stick your hand in there while you do it.

LIAM: I think you could just do it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, okay. I put my hand in and cast Armor of Agathys at 1st-level.

MATT: Okay, does it have somatic components on it?

TRAVIS: A cup of water.

MATT: What does it say under components, like, V&S?

TRAVIS: VSM.

MATT: Okay, great. So as you put your hand in there, and you do the manipulation of your fingers, the spell begins to apparate, but then the energy (whooshes) vanishes inside the slot, and you see a faint blue glow from the inside.

MARISHA: (snapping)

MATT: You glance, and you can see the intricate sigils. A portion of it is now glowing. About, maybe, a sixth of the full equation.

LAURA: (gasps) You have to do a spell of every type.

MARISHA: We have to do more.

TALIESIN: What's another--

LIAM: Or it's all Abjuration.

MARISHA: What about the dome? Maybe it's just--

LAURA: I've got an Abjuration spell. Do you think it's all Abjuration? Do we see any other type of glyphs, or?

MARISHA: You said that was one out of...

LIAM: Six.

MARISHA: Did you say one out of six?

MATT: A sixth of it is now glowing.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it was only at 1st-level.

MARISHA: Because it was only 1st-level.

LAURA: Oh.

MARISHA: Like, maybe it's a level thing.

TRAVIS: Unless we're making Captain Planet.

LIAM: I will stick my hand in, and just as an experiment, dump Shield in, as well. That's level one, as well, to see if it adds or...

MATT: As you go ahead and put your hand in there, and release the Shield, once again the Shield is about to apparate, and the magic (whoosh) shoots inside, and you glance inside, and another sixth of it, about a third of the interior is now glowing.

TRAVIS: Ooh, doggy!

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Was that the same? Was that also--

MARISHA: That was also Abjuration.

LIAM: I have lots of Shield, so I will do another two.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: I will do that twice more.

MATT: Two thirds of it are now glowing, with this same process repeating itself.

LIAM: Now, just so that I do not empty out--

MARISHA: Yeah, Caduceus, do you have anything?

TALIESIN: I don't even know how to figure out what I have.

LAURA: I've got-- Protection from Energy is-- but I've used up--

MARISHA: Anything protective is good.

LAURA: I've only got one 3rd-level spell left, and if we need that for Revivify, I'm--

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's a good one.

TRAVIS: I have another first level spell.

LIAM: I can keep doing it, if we need me to.

TALIESIN: Location...

SAM: We're sure nothing else will work, right?

LAURA: No.

TRAVIS: I can do it. I have first level spells.

LIAM: I never use my lower slots anymore.

LAURA: Then yeah, use them.

SAM: (mocking) Oh, wow.

LAURA: Because ours are higher level.

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I got a fourth level.

LIAM: I'll dump Shield twice at second level. I'll fill it up.

MATT: Okay, the first time you cast Shield at second level--

LIAM: Yeah?

MATT: It fills up the rest of it.

LIAM: Oh, okay.

LAURA: Oh, good.

MATT: Second level slot was what was required.

LIAM: Ah.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: So now with all six spell slots sacrificed, it glows blue, and the door (rumbling) opens before you.

TALIESIN: Should put that stuff back.

LIAM: Yeah, I was about to say.

MATT: As the door opens before you--

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck.

MATT: -- the following chamber is lit with a bright blue light that projects from the center of the ceiling of this nearly circular room, a very bright blue light source, affixed in the center. Walkways line the outer edges, while small staircases descend into the middle lower portion of this area. The far wall, you can see now, is adorned with an incredibly elaborate 15-foot sigil that wraps from the floor along the ceiling. Intricate designs that interweave like a puzzle of arcane inscriptions that rises up to wrap around that glowing blue source. You can see now, this bright, smooth cerulean blue-colored gem, about a foot and a half from edge to edge, that sits there above, roughly 30 feet in the air. In the far center of the room, you can immediately see scraps of a small encampment. Tents that have been pushed over. It's material. And what looks to be the middle of a heated fight. You can see other bodies strewn across the ground. Another figure standing down in the middle of that chamber. You see two humanoid figures are cut down immediately. (slicing) (thudding) Onto the ground. You see another one is left, lifted into the air by another figure, and you now see four other humanoids finishing carving, and standing back to return to the center. A woman is being held in the air, screaming, and the figure that's holding her, you just see a flash of nine points of red light (fluttering) across their body, as the screaming (snap) ceases, the limbs go limp, and the body drops to the ground. The figure then looks over, through the entrance to the hallway, right towards you.

LAURA: Uh oh.

MATT: (Irish accent) "My apologies, you've arrived early. I was hoping to tidy up a bit." And that's where we'll end tonight's episode. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Again!

SAM: That is what we call in the business a quiff hanger. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Oh, you've been sitting on that one.

TALIESIN: Well done, well done.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: Taliesin, what did you make?

LAURA: (laughs) Every time.

TALIESIN: I just was like, "Hey, I wonder-- this'll be fun in act three." I just thought we'd be on the other end of it. (laughter)

LIAM: Caleb, just with one foot, pushes DeRogna's body. (laughter)

MARISHA: Tries to hide it. Don't worry about it.

TALIESIN: Take off my cloak, lay it over-- (laughter)

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Wow.

LIAM: Just a cat in a cat box, just shh, shh, shh.

LAURA: How big did you say the room is?

MATT: The room would be about 45 to 50 foot from end to end, and it is a circular chamber.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy, we are here.

LAURA: It's happening. It's all happening.

TRAVIS: We're going to have a great--

LAURA: Oh god, I forgot. I used up all my middle spells.

TRAVIS: -- great conversation.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, right? Right, we had talky talkies, right?

ASHLEY: Just some chats.

MARISHA: Just a little convo.

LIAM: ♪ Final countdown ♪

TRAVIS: It's going to be great. It's going to be fine.

TALIESIN: I got a thing I can do.

LAURA: Oh god.

SAM: Wow.

TRAVIS: Oh, man, I'm-- okay.

LIAM: I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay. That's okay, that's okay, that's okay, that's okay.

TRAVIS: So there wasn't, like, beams came out of the eyes. They just boom-boom-boom-boom lit up red.

MATT: They just all lit around him. Like, you just saw this black silhouette with the blue light from overhead, in shadow from the body it was holding, and then suddenly you see all these red light sources light up around the body, and the person in its hand just goes limp.

TRAVIS: And it was Molly, plus one, with four other figures? And they had wiped out whoever was in there? Copy that.

SAM: These eyes that appeared on the body, were they on the body, they just started to glow, or did they, like, get burned into the body? We don't know.

MATT: No, it was Molly's body.

SAM: Oh, it was Molly's body that was glowing.

MARISHA: Like, lighting up, yeah.

SAM: Oh, okay.

LIAM: They surged.

SAM: Oh, got it. I thought, I thought...

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're in for it.

ASHLEY: We're in for it.

MATT: So we'll pick up from there, it'll be fun.

LAURA: Oh god. Why'd you have to touch the damn oozes? We could of had all these spells available.

TRAVIS: Don't get touched.

MARISHA: Don't get touched. No one get touched.

TALIESIN: ♪ You got the touch ♪

TRAVIS: Beau, Beau.

MARISHA: I know, I know.

MATT: Honestly, it wasn't until the shouting up through the tunnel that the oozes were like, "Oh." (laughter) (groaning)

TRAVIS: Oh, we could have just been quiet, gone through.

TALIESIN: We have company.

MATT: Stealth has a lot of benefits in certain spaces.

SAM: What was that spider? Was that spider alive. Was it just a statue? What was the spider?

TALIESIN: If we had gone behind the spider statue, there would have been the slaying of the Nine Eyes Sword, and we would be like, whatever. (laughter)

MATT: (silly voice) Oh well. Anyway.

TRAVIS: Good shit, Matty.

LIAM: It would have actually lead to a door to a balcony overlooking the same scene.

TRAVIS: Oh, damn it. Okay.

LAURA: God.

MATT: All right, we'll pick up from there next week.

MARISHA: Okay, all right.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

TALIESIN: Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: Until then, thank you guys for joining us. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet?

ASHLEY: No!

MATT: Good night.