Pre-Show[]
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.
ALL: We play Dungeons & Dragons!
MATT: Beginning of the new year! And with a new year, before we jump into our session, we do have some new announcements, including our first sponsor of the year, Thorum!
TRAVIS: (whisper) Thorum!
MATT: Sam, you look a little different. What happened to you?
LIL SAM: Botox, Matt! All celebrities use it! I think my doctor gave me a little too much, though.
MATT: Yeah, Botox made you look that young?
LIL SAM: I'm sorry, I told a lie. It was actually a haunted Zoltar machine I found at a carnival. (laughter)
MATT: A Zoltar machine. Wait. Wait, you just reverse Bigged yourself?
LIL SAM: Yeah, and now I'm stuck like this until I find a rare meteorite that can undo the curse. (laughter)
MATT: That's horrible, Sam. But you still have to read the Thorum ad.
LIL SAM: All right. (laughter) Yes, Mr. Matt. Thorum has been making distinctive rings for over a decade. They ship every single order for free within one business day, have a lifetime warranty, and over 10,000 five star reviews. Sorry, I need a sip. My throat is dry.
ASHLEY and LAURA: Oh, yeah.
ASHLEY: Get a sip, get a sip.
TRAVIS: Oh, yeah, get a little--
LIL SAM: These things are so hard.
ASHLEY: Oh yes, your juice box?
LIL SAM: Miss Marisha, will you do the straw for me?
MARISHA: Yes. Yeah, of course, honey. (laughter) There you go, sweetie. (laughter)
LIL SAM: Thanks. Thorum handcrafts unique wedding bands out of everything from dinosaur bone to whiskey barrel.
MARISHA: Mm-hmm.
LIL SAM: And now, Thorum makes mini... (stammers)
MARISHA: Minimalist.
LIL SAM: Thanks.
MARISHA: You're welcome.
LIL SAM: Minimalist watches featuring Hawaiian Koha wood, California Redwood.
MARISHA: Close.
LIL SAM: And even meteorite. (laughter)
MATT: Wait, wait, wait. Meteorite? That's... I think it's what you need to reverse the curse, actually.
ASHLEY: Oh.
LIL SAM: You're right! Miss Marisha, can you put the watch on me?
MARISHA: Yes, sweetie. (laughter) Oh, you're a lefty. (laughter)
LIL SAM: No, I'm a righty.
TRAVIS: No, that's where the watch goes.
MARISHA: That's where the... Oh, does it go on the left? I don't wear watches. (laughter)
LIL SAM: Thanks. Thanks. Oh. Oh no! Ah, ah! (magical whoosh) (screaming)
SAM: (pants) Wow! Thanks, Miss Marisha!
MARISHA: You're welcome, honey. (laughter)
SAM: And thanks, Thorum! Whether you need a wedding ring, anniversary ring, a watch, or you just want a ring that looks awesome, head over to Thorum.com and use code CRITICALROLE to get 20% off a truly unique ring. Matt. (slurps) Back to you. (laughter)
MATT: Thanks, Sam. Glad to have you back to whatever this is. (laughter) And thank you, Thorum.
TRAVIS: You're more handsome the other way.
ASHLEY: I know, I want the other one back! (laughter)
MATT: From there, Marisha, I believe you have something to talk about.
MARISHA: I do! The Bells Hells are back, baby!
TRAVIS: Baby! (cheering)
MARISHA: We are back from the break and we have some catching up to do, so join us for "4-Sided Dive" next Tuesday, January 16th at 7:00pm Pacific on Twitch and YouTube. And the reason why I'm shouting this out is because you can tune in to catch a special guest.
TRAVIS: A special guest?
ASHLEY: But who?
TRAVIS: Who could it be?
SAM: Who is it?
MARISHA: Mystery guest!
SAM: Whoa.
MARISHA: Beyond that, though, we hope you've also enjoyed diving into the Candela Obscura Core Rulebook over the holidays, and we're starting off 2024 strong and filled with Candela.
SAM: Yeah?
MARISHA: It's filled with-- The month of January is Candela-filled.
SAM: (laughs)
MARISHA: Yeah. Last week, The Circle of Tide & Bone aired its second episode, and the VOD is now available on YouTube. This thrilling chapter is game mastered by Aabria Iyengar. (cheering)
MATT: Yeah!
MARISHA: She's so powerful. With players Sam Riegel. (cheering)
MARISHA: Noshir Dalal. (cheering)
MARISHA: Gina Darling. (cheering)
MARISHA: Ashly Burch. (cheering)
MARISHA: And old man Liam O'Brien.
MATT: Yay!
LIAM: (elderly voice) Yay! It's my time to shine! (laughter)
MARISHA: Join these intrepid investigators as they dive into the ancient phenomenon lurking beneath the bustling city of Newfaire. The finale of this chapter will air on January 25th at 7:00pm Pacific on Twitch and YouTube, so definitely be sure to check in. It's a good'un!
MATT: Awesome. Thank you, Marisha.
TRAVIS: It's a good'un!
MATT: Laura, you're up next.
ASHLEY: Good'un.
LAURA: I am!
MATT: Yeah!
LAURA: After the Christmas h-holiday holiday--
SAM: What?
TRAVIS: You're so beautiful. (laughter)
LAURA: -- we have new merch items. (laughter)
LAURA: Check it out!
MARISHA: Superficial--
ASHLEY: Yay!
MATT: Oh yeah, oh!
LAURA: It's another one! Now it's my green Bag of Hoarding.
SAM: Oh, cool!
LAURA: There's green--
LIAM: Woodsy.
LAURA: -- with a green inside.
TRAVIS: Whoa!
LAURA: Do you feel earthy?
TRAVIS: Travel.
LAURA: But you also hoard dice? Pattern art by Grace Berríos inspired by Critter Christina Ahrens. Thank you again, Christina.
SAM: That's really cool.
ASHLEY: I use this for tools.
SAM: Yeah! Oh yeah!
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: That's actually pretty smart.
LAURA: It's good for, yeah!
ASHLEY: It's good for a lot of stuff.
TRAVIS: I keep my bones in there. (laughter)
LAURA: I keep my dice in there. (laughs) Anyway. We have-- Also you might recognize this. (excited vocalizing)
LIAM and MATT: Yes! (cheering)
TRAVIS: Oh, it looks so good!
LAURA: "Mighty Nein: Echoes of the Solstice" T-shirt!
LIAM: Oh, I love it!
ASHLEY: Woo!
LAURA: Artist Jordyn Torrence. Amazing.
TRAVIS: Shout out Jordyn Torrence!
LAURA: Fabulous, Jordyn Torrence. It's a variant of our live show, if you didn't get a chance to get that.
TRAVIS: And we did that. That fever dream, that was real.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
SAM: Wait, you said it's a variant?
LAURA: It's a variant.
SAM: It's like subtly different?
LAURA: It's all the same, except it doesn't say "Live" on the back.
SAM: Oh, cool!
ASHLEY: Ooh!
LIAM: Oh!
TALIESIN: We can finally get one.
LAURA: I know!
ASHLEY: Yeah, we can finally get one.
TALIESIN: I know, finally!
SAM: That's a great shirt.
MATT: It's pretty cool, yep.
ASHLEY: I love it!
LAURA: Don't you steal that. I'm going to take it.
ASHLEY: I want it! (laughter) It's mine!
MATT: There it is.
LIAM: Sam, it is so great that you let one of your kids stop crocheting wine cozies all day to come and be a part of the show.
SAM: I'm sure he had a fun time.
ASHLEY: I miss him.
MATT: Wait, that was your son?
SAM: (sighs) What are you talking about, Matt? I've been here all along!
ASHLEY: Oh wow. (laughter)
MARISHA: Master yes and-ing.
TRAVIS: Commitment to the bit.
MATT: I have a lot to process. I guess that concludes our announcements. With that--
LAURA: Oh god.
MATT: I think let's go ahead and jump into--
LIAM: Wait, let's start planning!
MATT: -- tonight's episode of Critical Role.
TRAVIS: Boom!
TRAVIS: No!
♪ Critical ♪
♪ Critical ♪
♪ It's Thursday ♪
♪ It's Thursday night! ♪
ASHLEY: ♪ One-by-one, we climb until we reach the top. ♪
♪ Two-by-two, we fall. ♪
LAURA: ♪ Will we meet our end or meet our destiny? ♪
♪ Hold your breath and roll! ♪
MATT: How do you want to do this?
ALL: ♪ It's Thursday night ♪
♪ All ye Critters, come join us ♪
♪ It's time to continue our plight ♪
♪ There is magic and mystery ♪
♪ Who knows what will happen? ♪
♪ He might! ♪
♪ But one thing's for sure, ♪
♪ We never give up on the fight! ♪
LIAM: ♪ From the healer ♪
♪ To the renegade ♪
MATT: ♪ We all share the same goal ♪
MATT and TALIESIN: ♪ Adding more allies ♪
♪ Taking more chances ♪
SAM: ♪ Hold your breath and roll ♪
MARISHA: You can certainly try.
ALL: ♪ It's Thursday night ♪
♪ All ye Critters, come join us ♪
♪ It's time to continue our plight ♪
♪ It's Thursday night. ♪
♪ There is magic and mystery ♪
♪ From darkness, our friendship will rise ♪
♪ But one thing's for sure: ♪
♪ We never give up on the fight ♪
♪ Oh, get ready, ♪
♪ Get ready, ♪
♪ It's Thursday night! ♪
(flames whooshing)
Part I[]
MATT: And welcome back. So last we left off: Bells Hells, after a brief excursion into the Fey Realm to do some team building exercises after a bit of a fracture happened between their respective friendships before going into a recon mission to the red Moon of Ill Omen.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
LIAM: Shut the fuck up.
MATT: You acquired some materials. With the help of Allura Vysoren, you returned to the Hellcatch Valley to one of the nearby resistance garrisons against the Ruby Vanguard's plot under Ludinus Da'leth to unleash the god eater Predathos that sits within that moon. Here, you've met with a number of powerful figures, this side of this troop. You were given an opportunity and a heavy distraction to sneak in from the southeastern side of the excavation site. After being dropped off by Keyleth of the Air Ashari, her summoning a massive storm to give even more challenging power to the distraction that surrounds this site, you all begin to slink in under cover of magical shadow and disguises to appear like members of the Vanguard. You push through the dense sandstorm, the sounds of conflict, explosions, shouts and bestial war cries echoing from the other side of the massive pit. You approach the outskirts. Here you can see from where you stand, the shapes of where the cliff begins to reveal the edge of the excavation site. You see massive ballista now embedded into the side that weren't there previously, a number of tents set up for individuals that are keeping watch. Though you do not see immediately any signs of other figures other than the large, slowly lumbering Vanguard Warder that is (heavy thudding) peeking around while the majority of the defenses are shifting focus onto the other side of the site. What are you doing?
SAM: (sighs) Well, we all took our time off to plan.
LAURA: (laughs)
LIAM: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Very thoughtfully and carefully.
LAURA: Uh-huh.
MARISHA: The entire break.
LAURA: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
LIAM: For the last three weeks, yep.
ASHLEY: Yes, it was such a long time.
LAURA: We were doing nothing but planning.
TRAVIS: The last 45 seconds.
LIAM: We're anywhere we want to be away from the lip of this robit and the stone, right?
MATT: Mm-hmm.
LIAM: So we could come from here, we could come from there.
MATT: You all rolled really high stealth. So I'd say with the storm's aid, you begin to approach, and you watch as other figures begin to appear.
SAM: Oh.
MATT: You do see over the edge, looking in the direction of the aggressive fray that is happening, a Reiloran who is currently keeping at the ready to this large, wicked, arcane arcing device that is now built into this space.
MARISHA: Can we tell what that does? The wicked arcane arcing device?
LIAM: What its function is?
TRAVIS: It's a suppository.
MATT: Make an arcana check.
MARISHA: All right, an arcana check.
TRAVIS: I'll assist you.
MARISHA: Okay. Chetney.
TRAVIS: Yeah?
MARISHA: What does that look like to you?
TRAVIS: Let me tell you where it looks like it could go.
MARISHA: (laughs)
MARISHA: A 16, not great.
MATT: 16? It looks dangerous, but you, from this distance especially, have no idea of what its specific function is, but given the nature of where you are and the other things that are affixed to the battlements, it might be some sort of defense.
MARISHA: All right. It's hard to tell, it's real dusty, but feels like it would pop our asses if we get too close.
TRAVIS: Fair.
LIAM: They probably, with the number of ships that have been downed around here, they're ready for things coming from the sky. Those things look like they can aim out and up and--
TRAVIS: Yep.
MATT: Yep, the large ballista can be directed.
TRAVIS: It looks like one person on each of the ballista and an individual standing next to that magical--
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: -- crab claw?
MATT: It looks like the majority of the ground forces that were parading around and keeping vigil along the outer edge have moved except for the bare minimum that are set to run the air defenses.
LIAM: Okay. Well, direct makes no sense.
SAM: Well, so we had talked about-- First of all, Chetney, I'm going to hand you the scroll of Greater Restoration.
TRAVIS: Scroll of Greater Restoration, got it!
SAM: In case we get--
TRAVIS: (yeets scroll)
SAM: -- near Planerider Ryn. (laughter)
SAM: Because you're a Planerider too, you should do the honors.
TRAVIS: Of course! I don't want to make it too easy.
SAM: I know that--
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: I know that we were talking about maybe going in stealth and shutting this thing down.
LAURA: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Oh, it's already moved in the time that we've been talking?
LAURA: Yes, yes, yes.
MATT: It's patrolling.
TRAVIS: Oh, dude! We can do this like fucking "Metal Gear Solid." We'll see what its patrol circuit looks like.
SAM: Sure!
MARISHA: 100%.
LAURA: Yeah, we just got to make sure we go fast enough. We can't take so much time.
TRAVIS: Oh, there's a diversion! Holy shit, fuck! You're right!
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, there is a little bit of a ticking clock.
TRAVIS: Oh right, right.
SAM: But wait, wait. I just had a thought that sort of ruins our plan.
TRAVIS: Okay.
LAURA: Oh no.
SAM: Well, do you see a head on that thing?
LIAM: Which thing?
SAM: Or eyes?
LIAM: The big guy?
SAM: Yeah.
LAURA: Mm-mm.
SAM: So it doesn't need to see to see. If Chetney goes in invisible, what if it can see him anyway?
TRAVIS: We'll find out real fast.
TALIESIN: Hopefully Chetney will still be a little careful going in, even if you're--
TRAVIS: Always.
LIAM: Do we want to, all of us-- Well.
ASHLEY: Just run in?
LIAM: Do this in two phases. Do we want to send Chetney to check out that tent there? See if it looks available for us?
TALIESIN: That would be great.
LIAM: Then have Chetney stealth, then tell us if we can join him? Then if we're in there, then he goes further while we're closer.
LAURA: We're all telepathically connected too.
SAM: We are, that's right!
ASHLEY: That's right, that's right.
SAM: That's right. For eight hours.
LIAM: So I can be very loud! (laughter)
TRAVIS: I will--
SAM: Ow.
MATT: That's so weird.
TALIESIN: Why are you brain whispering?
MATT: Orym has much more bravado internally.
TRAVIS: I will click my boots of speed, which doubles my walking, running, all that stuff, speed.
MATT: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Then I will use my action to cast Invisibility on myself.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: I will head for the tent.
SAM: Wait! Where are you? Do you want the EMP device?
LIAM: Is this better?
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: Ah! Okay, I gave him the arcane--
TRAVIS: Comms check, comms check. Balls one-two-three.
SAM: Arcane disruption device.
ASHLEY: Bells Hells, three-two-one.
SAM: One of them.
MATT: All right, so you're holding that at your side.
TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll actually put it in the little bag of holding.
MATT: Okay. Make a stealth check with advantage, please.
TRAVIS: Okay.
ASHLEY: And plus 10.
LAURA: Oh!
TRAVIS: Plus 10!
MATT: No, because--
LAURA: Because he's going to wander away from you.
TALIESIN: He's wandering away. So no plus 10.
SAM: Oh, it's within your range?
LAURA: It's within 30 feet of you.
TRAVIS: Don't worry, got my own plus 10. 25.
ASHLEY: Okay.
SAM: Ooh, nice!
LIAM: Red Rocket, Red Rocket, this is Green Bean. (laughter)
TRAVIS: "Red Rocket." (laughs) What's Green Bean in that analogy?
MATT: Okay, so what did you roll?
MARISHA: "Green Bean." (laughs)
TRAVIS: A 25.
SAM: Woodchuck to Gray Squirrel.
MATT: 25.
TRAVIS: With advantage.
MATT: Okay. You are darting where?
TRAVIS: Did you want to go small tent, big tent?
LAURA: Big. Big.
TRAVIS: Big tent.
LAURA: Big tent right on through.
TRAVIS: Big tent [inaudible].
TALIESIN: We got a lot of people.
MATT: Okay. You dart past as you hear the (engine revving) and you watch as a skirmisher (engine revving) goes careening by, kicking up dust and sand into the surrounding winds that are whipping past you. You instinctively duck down for a second as it passes and you can see there's a group of three of them that are tearing by and going in the direction of where the fray is happening. You gather yourself and then dart over towards where the edge of the lip of that larger tent is. The Warder turns and begins to continue its path on the patrol.
LIAM: ♪ Doo doo doo doo doo doo ♪
ASHLEY: So he's just going right there.
LAURA: ♪ Doo doo doo ♪
TRAVIS: He's going to trip on that rock! Can I--
LAURA: (clunks)
TRAVIS: Oh, did I reach the tent?
LAURA: Ow.
MATT: You did. You go inside, and you see within, there are three tables. Looks like a-- Likely a rest area for patrolling guardmen or soldiers when they're not in the process of either being completely on or-- There's no sleeping arrangements in here, but it looks like this is mainly a rest area. There are a handful of small arms and weapons. Looks like there are areas where weapons have been taken, and you can see there's one Vanguard soldier that is sitting in the back table that is quietly sitting there, and you quickly get the sense that either they're praying, or is nervous.
SAM: Jesus.
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: No.
MATT and LIAM: (laugh)
ASHLEY: Just getting it out real quick before the end of the world! (laughter)
MATT: I don't know how the day's going to go! (laughter)
LIAM: Yeah!
ASHLEY: One more, one more!
TRAVIS: Just rubbing one out?
MARISHA: Yeah! (laughter)
SAM: He's got a date later and he doesn't want to--
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to get it out first. (laughter)
MARISHA: Get out the poison. (laughter)
LIAM: I've got to take the Bloody Bridge.
LAURA: Sorry! Oh!
TALIESIN: Oh.
MATT: Anyway.
TRAVIS: I will relay telepathically back to the group that there is one individual in there that looks very nervous, a bunch of arms. Do I see any piles of barrels?
LAURA: Wait, he has a lot of arms?
TRAVIS: Piles of barrels of munitions? Gunpowder, anything that looks like explosions?
MATT: Make a perception check.
ASHLEY: Do it well. (laughs)
TRAVIS: Oh, yeah. 18.
MATT: 18, not bad.
MARISHA: We're going to die.
MATT: Glancing about, you don't see anything that looks explosive. You do see there are some small iron cage-like barrels that contain the number of heavy crossbow bolts that go with a handful of either crossbows. There's only two of them that are currently hung up still. You can see there are sections where there were others hanging on that were taken. You do also see two massive bolts, four and a half, five foot long bolts that you gather are probably leftover munitions for the massive ballista outside. But you don't see anything that looks explosive.
TRAVIS: Or incendiary?
MATT: Not at the moment, no.
TRAVIS: I could try and freak this guy out and make him run, or you could all rush the tent and probably tie him down. Yeah.
TALIESIN: What's in tent number two real quickly? Just so that we make sure that we're covering all of our bases.
LIAM: That door is by the big guy.
ASHLEY: Yeah, if he starts--
TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah. I'll leave him in there freaked out, and quickly. (footsteps skittering)
LAURA: What if, yo, what if I use-- I have the Magic Mouth on that scarf.
SAM: Could you think louder?
LAURA: I have Magic Mouth on the scarf I just got.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LAURA: What if I cast Magic Mouth on a rock over here and told the soldiers over there to come help? They'd head that direction?
TRAVIS: That's a good diversion.
MARISHA: I'm also just noticing, I don't know if any of us have seen it yet, but there are two guards manning these ballistas. Do you guys see this?
LAURA: Oh!
TALIESIN: Yes we do, yes.
LAURA: No, I didn't.
MARISHA: So yeah, maybe something to help--
LAURA: Distract?
MARISHA: -- just drive all the people.
SAM: Let's get out of that tent. and then we can figure out-- We can divide and conquer, right?
MARISHA: We're going to run out of time.
LAURA: Yeah, we got to go.
TALIESIN: We got to go.
MARISHA: Okay.
SAM: How are we going to disable the guy when we get in there? Hold Person?
LAURA: Chet's going to strangle him before we get in there.
TALIESIN: Is there room to throw down the hole?
TRAVIS: That'll drop my invisibility.
LAURA: Oh, right.
LIAM: Is there room to throw down the hole in there?
TRAVIS: Is there room to throw down the hole from what I know of the hole in the room I see?
MATT: If you move two of the tables, yes.
TRAVIS: That's loud and takes time, but yeah.
MARISHA: I might--
TRAVIS: I'll throw him in there.
SAM: I have Command, I have Fast Friends.
MARISHA: Imogen!
TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SAM: We have some things that we can do to him.
MARISHA: I might be able to spook him. To scare him.
TRAVIS: Can I come out of the tent--
SAM: Yeah!
TRAVIS: -- and peek towards the smaller tent, but I mean slicing the pie so that just my eye is looking to see if the automaton is facing towards me or away from me.
MATT: It is just now heading in your direction, but it's coming to the very edge of the tent, and you see it stop, and begins to turn.
TRAVIS: As it turns, I'll start to crest out, and head towards the small tent. Just in case it can see things that are invisible.
MATT: I'll use this as a marker of where you're going.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Not even moving inside, but waiting for the wind to move the flap and try and see from the outside what I can see.
MATT: Okay. A brief glance inside, it looks to have a few chairs. Looks like an empty rack where polearms and other weapons were at the ready, and is empty.
SAM: Ooh!
TRAVIS: Can I step inside? I'll (sniffs) take a smell to see if I can smell anybody that might not be visible?
MATT: Sure, make a perception check.
TRAVIS: Oh yeah, 21!
MATT: 21. Sniffing the air in here, the Hellcatch has its own unique odd scent, and here the wind is picking up the smell of the smattering of old blood that's being thrown across the battlefield in the distance, and that iron scent is catching your nostrils. But focusing in on the space inside, you can smell sweat, you can smell that familiar smell of fear in the air. It lingers, but is also fading, meaning people left here, anxious, moments ago.
TRAVIS: Anxious moments ago, right. To the diversion.
LAURA: These are the remnants. From what--
TRAVIS: So my recommendation would be to run and overwhelm that one guy in the tent. Everybody get in there.
LAURA: All right, let's go.
ASHLEY: All right.
LIAM: One last--
TRAVIS: Yeah.
TALIESIN: What does roam mean?
LIAM: Wait, B! B plan.
TALIESIN: Wait, yeah.
LIAM: One of us stands on the side of the tent with the hole. You get his attention. You say, "Hey, everyone's needed outside." He comes curious out, roll the hole out, and then I can either vine him in, or we lure him out to the hole.
LAURA: Okay, pull the hole out, hold it down, but it's windy, so the hole's going to blow away.
TALIESIN: The hole's going to be very tricky, and we also have a crossbow. We need to disable that crossbow somehow.
LAURA: Look, what if we lay the hole down right here?
LIAM: That's what I'm saying.
LAURA: Then I talk to him in his brain and tell him to come on out. Then he comes out and falls in the hole and we pick the hole up.
SAM: We're talking about putting a 10-foot by 10-foot hole out in the middle of the open? What if somebody sees?
LAURA: We got to time it perfectly while the big metal guy's--
SAM: Or we could just go in and bonk him on the head, right?
MARISHA: I think we do that.
TRAVIS: We could Command him, charm him, hold him, and then gag him and tie his hands.
TALIESIN: Charm him. He can get--
LAURA: We're running out of time.
MATT: All right. So in keeping tabs on the patrol here, you all begin to rush just as the Warder is finishing its turn here. Everyone, please make another stealth check for me. But you all--
LAURA: Still at advantage?
MATT: You are at advantage as long as--
LAURA: Advantage because of the windstorm?
MATT: Yes, because of the windstorm, you have advantage.
MARISHA: Stealth?
MATT: Yes.
TRAVIS: Can I get a DM ruling?
LAURA: Stealth at advantage plus 10.
TRAVIS: This ballista looks like it could see that guy on the other one over there. Does it have line of sight? Like could I turn this ballista?
MATT: Over here?
TRAVIS: Yeah, and attempt a shot?
MATT: You can. He would have half cover, but yeah. You can totally attempt it.
LAURA: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Okay.
TALIESIN: Yep.
LAURA: Again?
TALIESIN: On the fucking--
LAURA: Nice.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: All righty, so starting over here with Laudna.
MARISHA: 29.
MATT: 29, okay.
SAM: 27.
MATT: Great.
ASHLEY: 30.
MATT: Great.
LAURA: 28.
MATT: Great.
LIAM: 28.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: 37.
TRAVIS: Let's fucking go!
MATT: Woo-hoo!
ASHLEY: Let's go, let's go.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: Pizza party at Domino.
MATT: You all dart through the dust storm, but darting knowingly with your direction almost facing out towards the sounds of the battle and struggle that's now almost completely enveloped by the sandstorm that Keyleth has summoned through the clouds. You can barely make out the shapes of things shifting in the distance. The majority of the central excavation is now itself enveloped in a dust storm. All you see is the red glow is diffused from the Malleus Key and the Bloody Bridge throughout the surrounding space. Like this ominous fog light that's sitting maybe a few hundred feet away. Darting through, you move past that large rock and then go rushing into the tent. You all get inside just as you hear the footfalls of the Warders turn and slowly approach on its walk. What are you doing?
LAURA: Does he see us immediately?
TALIESIN: We are dressed as--
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SAM: Oh, but there's six of us.
LAURA: True.
TRAVIS: Though we made it in the tent, right?
MATT: You made it in the tent, yeah.
TALIESIN: (sighs)
TRAVIS: Got to wait for it--
ASHLEY: We're in the little one or the large one?
TRAVIS: You're in the little one, right?
ASHLEY: Oh, okay.
MATT: You all go into the large one or the little one?
SAM: I think the large one.
LAURA: The large one.
MATT: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so you dart over into that chamber. As you do, the man who's standing there, he looks to be maybe in his early 20s, human, hair cut very, very short, beads of sweat down his forehead as he's wearing the Vanguard robe and he's rocking in his chair as you all walk in. He goes, "Ah, I'm coming!" He grabs one of the swords and sheathes it awkwardly onto the side as you all approach.
LAURA: In his head--
ASHLEY: You got this.
LAURA: Yeah, in his head, I'll say: Hurry up, soldier, before the fight's over.
MATT: Make an intimidation check.
ASHLEY: Can I Guidance?
LAURA: G-g-g-g-guidance!
LIAM: That'll do.
MATT: (laughs) I'll say in this instance, probably no Guidance.
LAURA: Hm.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay. Fair enough, fair enough.
TRAVIS: Always doing that freaky shit.
LAURA: Perfect 10!
SAM: Perfect 10?
LAURA: Perfect 10, I'm good at other things. Not intimidation-- is not my--
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Damn it. (laughs)
SAM: It's okay.
MATT: It's okay, so he looks at you and goes (pants). Puts the sword in and gets up and starts walking towards the edge of the tent and he slows a couple steps and looks over at you.
TALIESIN: (with presence) Now, son.
MATT: You make intimidation.
TALIESIN: Thank you.
MATT: I'll say with disadvantage.
TALIESIN: Okay.
TRAVIS: Better than 10.
MATT: If only because he's starting--
LIAM: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
MATT: There's a few things that factor here.
TALIESIN: All right, no, no, no, let it roll.
LIAM: We're sus.
TALIESIN: That's 19.
SAM: Oh!
MATT: 19.
TALIESIN: I'm rolling real good.
MATT: Yeah. He's about to rush out and stops and gives you an odd look and then as you shout at him, looks at you, (whimpers) and darts past, turns to the side. pushes through and vanishes off into the storm. You hear him go (waning wails).
LAURA: I'm going to tuck my hair into a scarf.
SAM: Oh, nice idea.
LAURA: So nobody sees the purple.
SAM: Let's bring him back in and ask him to go into it now. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Shall I take out the automaton?
SAM: Who said that?
LAURA: Yes. Should we take out the?
ASHLEY: What if we just move the tent? (laughter)
LAURA: Full box-head.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: Go full "Metal Gear Solid."
TRAVIS: Come on.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: I mean--
MATT: It is pretty great.
MARISHA: You know when--
TRAVIS: We could.
MARISHA: -- you see tents?
TRAVIS: They forgot to tie it down.
MARISHA: Yes, exactly.
TRAVIS: They're chasing it.
ASHLEY: It's windy.
MARISHA: We just hold on and we kited down.
TRAVIS: That's pretty fucking funny.
TALIESIN: We could disable the crossbow.
MARISHA: I don't hate it. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Do we think the crossbow's going to be a problem?
LAURA: You have Wind Gust, you could control the tent.
TRAVIS: Chasing Barney.
LIAM: We're in a windstorm. I'm sure it is tied--
LAURA: But you have Gust!
LIAM: -- securely to the ground.
LAURA and MARISHA: But what if it wasn't?
ASHLEY: We can untie it.
TRAVIS: These things happen.
LIAM: It's going to go whoosh.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: We get a ride.
ASHLEY: We could Guidance.
LAURA: You have Gust.
TRAVIS: It's a bad idea, plus--
MATT: It's a cantrip.
LIAM: Cantrip!
MATT: It's a magic fart.
TRAVIS: We have to go over the ridge. (laughter)
LAURA: It'd be so fun, though.
LIAM: I'm like a cat. I can blow a glass off a table.
LAURA: Oh, I'm so weak. What if I cast Fly on somebody who's strong, like Ashton and then he can pull it while he's flying?
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: Hey, I love this.
TRAVIS: You sounded like Dora the Explorer there. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Misa Dora.
TALIESIN: We will go kite flying when this is all over.
LAURA: Can you say fly?
MARISHA: We got to go kite flying.
TALIESIN: In the meantime.
SAM: All right.
TRAVIS: Should I take out Optimus Prime?
MARISHA: Well, maybe if you wait until he paces back this way and then these guys will come and check it out and then we can just sneak by?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah. They'll be like, "Oh no, it's broken again."
TRAVIS: As he starts moving away, I'll (patters).
LAURA: Doesn't it take 10 minutes for it to?
SAM: No, it can be instantaneous.
LIAM: No, it's got three settings.
SAM: Before I gave it to him, I showed him how it works. This dial is instant, this dial is one minute.
TRAVIS: One minute.
SAM: Okay.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LAURA: Okay. Great.
TRAVIS: So I will stealth towards Optimus Prime 80 feet from the small tent and I will try and make my way up and (patters, plop).
MATT: Okay, you're trying to place it on him?
SAM: Is it magnetic?
MATT: You didn't hear anything about magnets, no.
SAM: Oh boy. Maybe between his metal sheets.
TRAVIS: As I'm approaching his--
TRAVIS: Are we not worried about the tower more than the robot? But either way.
LAURA: We should be.
LIAM: We're trying to make a distraction.
TRAVIS: Do I see-- How big is it?
LIAM: Got anything sticky?
MATT: It's about that large. It's a cluster. It has this clockwork shell to it that looks like it's essentially another device that was repurposed for this. You see what looks like a residuum, I want to say a bowl or a shard of smooth residuum on the inside and there is this sparking mechanism within that causes that burst to exaggerate and explode outward.
TRAVIS: Do I see any ridges or gaps on the back of the automaton where it could be stuck or wedged?
MATT: It's possible.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I don't really have anything sticky. I have fishing tackle, I have some honey.
LIAM: No pitch from earlier?
SAM: You need any help out there? Because we might have stuff.
TRAVIS: Oh yeah, before I, yeah. I'll move off to the side with my invisibility since he's walking back. Does anybody-- Telepathically: Anybody have anything sticky icky icky?
SAM: I have some, I have my starter.
TRAVIS: Starter?
LAURA: Your what?
SAM: My starter, my sourdough starter.
LAURA: Oh.
SAM: I always have some starter.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
TRAVIS: Is that sticky?
LAURA: That's sticky.
ASHLEY: It's sticky.
TALIESIN: It's real sticky.
ASHLEY: It's real sticky.
TRAVIS: Okay, I've got some honey. Maybe between those two things?
MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SAM: All right, I'm going to save a little because I need it to re-leaven tomorrow. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Are we sure we want to put honey on the EMP?
TRAVIS: I'll take it.
TALIESIN: Never mind.
MATT: Okay, so you take FCG's bread starter with some honey.
TRAVIS: Like a handball Stickum.
MATT: Yeah, okay.
TALIESIN: Have you guys approached anything electronic before?
TRAVIS: I'll (skitters) protect it from the dust. Actually, I'll try and shield it from the sandstorm so it doesn't get covered in sand.
LAURA: Good idea, good idea.
MATT: That's not a bad plan. All right, make a stealth check as you approach it from behind.
LAURA: You can do this.
TRAVIS: I believe in myself. 29.
ASHLEY: Woo.
MATT: 29.
TRAVIS: A dirty 19.
MATT: Yeah.
SAM: For stealth or for putting it on?
TRAVIS: For stealth.
SAM: Okay.
MATT: So you dart up behind as it's still continuing its gait away from you.
TRAVIS: Two and a 19.
MATT: As it begins to stop, you rush up behind and you can see there are areas where its leg armor plates stick outward and allow itself to shift and rotate and there's just enough of a gap in there where it looks like it could be jammed in there. But you have a quick moment to try and do so. Are you going to try and throw it or are you trying to rush up and place it?
TRAVIS: I'll try and rush up and place it because I also need to pull my hand off of it. So (plop, thud) and pull it off.
MATT: Okay, cool.
TRAVIS: While pressing the (click) one minute button.
MATT: Great. Go ahead and make a dexterity check for me with advantage because you are unseen.
TRAVIS: Okay. Dirty 19, so 21.
SAM: Nice, nice.
TRAVIS: Plus two for my dexterity.
MATT: 21, all right. So its armor class is 20. (gasping)
MATT: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Oh oh oh!
TALIESIN: Good to know.
TRAVIS: I rolled a two and a 19.
TALIESIN: You've fought it before. So you recall somewhat how strong it is. So its armor is pretty slick and parts of the plate shift and move. So there's a good chance that it could have tumbled out, but you just managed to find the exact part where it gets wedged where a number of the hinges meet and you can hear it shifting, but not grinding into destruction, but it's like (squelches) as it begins to turn around. Do you dart back?
TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll start heading back.
MATT: Okay. You dart and it rotates around, shifting this way. (stomps)
MARISHA: My hands smell like Mediterranean.
MATT: It comes to the edge of the tent, stops and pauses. You hear a massive explosion in the distance and some sort of massive roar of a beast and you hear some voices down below on the opposite side shouting, some that appear to be from fear, others from victory. You're uncertain. You watch as this entity begins to turn around and takes two more steps before this dull (poof) little bursting sound, like someone had burst an inflated pig's bladder under a blanket. It has that muffled feel, that (poof).
LAURA: Why?
TALIESIN: That's so specific.
LAURA: That is such a specific sound.
LIAM: Haven't you ever?
LAURA and MATT: (laugh)
MATT: They didn't really have balloons so much at this time.
LAURA: Yes, yes, yes.
TALIESIN: I get it.
MATT: So it was the closest analogy I could make that felt thematic and to make you do that makes it all the more worthwhile.
TRAVIS: (deeply) Look in my basement.
MATT: As it does, you watch or you hear the (booms, clangs) and you glance out the side and watch it just slightly shifting as the body comes to rest face-down in the dust.
TRAVIS: Automaton is down. I don't think we go down the middle. We should go to either the left or the right, probably the left because it's the closest.
MATT: "What's happening?"
SAM: Yeah, let's see what they do.
MATT: "Check on the Warder!" (frustrated grunts)"
LAURA: Please be the one near us.
MARISHA: I know, please go, go, go, go.
ASHLEY: Yes, yes, yes.
MARISHA: Go.
TRAVIS: Damn it, I wanted the middle one to go.
MATT: "Why don't you go check?"
TRAVIS: (laughs) Yes, yes.
ASHLEY: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Yes, talk to each other!
ASHLEY: "Why me?"
MATT: You watch as the other one turns and looks at him, turns its head, and the other one goes, "I got it."
TRAVIS: The one in the middle is straight up Reiloran, right?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Yes.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: Comes and darts down.
TALIESIN: Do we have a plan for that?
LAURA: Nope.
MATT: Comes in to inspect and is now doing--
SAM: Go up and get that fucking--
MATT: -- a once-over looking around it, looking around the nearby storm. "I'm not qualified for this!"
LIAM: I mean, this is the moment.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LAURA: We have to go.
TRAVIS: We should go this way and go around him.
LAURA: Go up the outside tent and climb up the cliff on this side of the rock.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: Okay, so you dart up around the outside and climb the cliff.
TRAVIS: Except for me. I will stay in the middle just in case.
MARISHA: Okay.
TRAVIS: I'm just saying, you could turn that ballista around towards him.
TALIESIN: I think we're trying to sneak.
ASHLEY: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
SAM: We could.
MATT: Okay, so the rest of you are darting around this way and you're climbing up the cliff side?
LAURA: Uh-huh.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Trying to time it when the Reiloran is looking at the thing.
LAURA: Where is he looking right now?
MATT: He's facing outward, and you just see black shark-like eyes. So you have no bead on a pupil or a specific direction.
LAURA: Does he look like the Reilorans that I've summoned in the past or does he look different?
MATT: He looks like one of them.
LAURA: Okay.
SAM: As we leave the tent, I'm going to just Sympathetically Bind to four of you. So let's just say everyone at this table for ease of use. (laughs)
ASHLEY: Okay.
LIAM: So we're just in disguise at this point?
LAURA: We're just in disguise. Okay.
MATT: As you're all climbing up on the cliff carefully--
SAM: Are we going to use the ballista?
MARISHA: I'm going to-- Why would we do that?
TRAVIS: Yeah, if you don't have to.
SAM: To shoot the guy.
LAURA: (sigh of dismissal)
MARISHA: I'm going to have Pâté--
LAURA: It's really loud.
MARISHA: -- go invisible.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: I'm going to make Pâté fly to-- Gosh I wish-- We need our laser pointers. Behind to this side of the Reiloran.
MATT: Uh-huh.
MARISHA: And make a scuffle.
ASHLEY: (scurrying)
MATT: Make a scuffle?
MARISHA: He's invisible, but I want him to come over here and do a little tap dance.
SAM: (Pâté) Oh.
ASHLEY: Tappy tappy.
MATT: Okay. He makes a little (shuffling) over in the area quietly and you watch as the Reiloran turns this way.
MARISHA: Go, go. Go, go, go.
LAURA: Go, go, go!
SAM: Where are we going?
LAURA: Are we hiding behind this next rock over here?
TALIESIN: Yeah, we're hopping--
MARISHA: Can we go down?
LIAM: I don't think that's possible.
MARISHA: Is there a switchback that starts leading us down?
MATT: Coming along this way, there are other guards and you see other warders on this side. There is a path that leads down this way.
ASHLEY: Of course.
MATT: A switchback that goes down. Also as you're all heading over to this side, the Reiloran glances off to its side, moves its head this direction, and the tent over here, a flap on the side opens and you watch as one of the Reiloran--
TRAVIS: Oh!
ASHLEY: Oh no!
LAURA: Juggernaut?
MATT: -- juggernauts steps out. You see them both looking at each other, having a silent conversation as it gives a nod, looks down in the area where the scuffling is, and puts its hand out for a second. Make a strength saving throw for little baby boy.
TRAVIS: Matt, could I be perched on the, I'm sorry, this part of the wall down here?
MATT: Right here?
TRAVIS: Yeah, like halfway up.
SAM: They're going to make us.
MATT: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Is it loaded?
MATT: I'll acknowledge that you're about halfway up.
ASHLEY: Is the ballista loaded?
MARISHA: Oh no!
LAURA: The ballista is loaded.
MARISHA: Natural one.
SAM and LAURA: Oh no.
MARISHA: No wait, it's a seven.
MATT: Both ballistas are loaded.
SAM: It doesn't matter.
MARISHA: But it still doesn't matter. (laughs)
SAM: (laughs)
LAURA: I don't think they'll turn around all the way. We'd have to (grunts) to get it back in this direction.
TRAVIS: It would be loud.
TRAVIS and LIAM: (creaking)
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Invisible though he may be, the Reiloran over here puts its hand out and you see this (poof) of dust and the scuffling stops
LAURA: Oh!
MATT: In your head, you know and you can hear the sound of--
MARISHA: They got him.
MATT: He's like, (Pâté) "(strangled groans) Something's holding me down. (strangled groans)"
MARISHA: Get out of there!
LAURA: Can you poof him away?
LIAM: Oh jeez.
MARISHA: I can, yeah. If I need to. It's okay.
MATT: The juggernaut lifts its fist up.
SAM: Oh boy, he's going to crush Pâté.
MARISHA: It's all right, I can bring him back.
TRAVIS: (gasps)
SAM: You're heartless.
TALIESIN: I feel like this is a good moment to--
TRAVIS: What kind of mother--
TALIESIN: -- get the fuck out of here.
LAURA: Yeah, they're distracted. We should go.
MATT: It's looking around for any shifting and movement--
SAM: Just going to go?
LAURA: Yep.
MATT: -- and is going to make a giant fist motion down.
LAURA: Are we going to go leap and jump, like you said?
MARISHA: Maybe we should.
TALIESIN: Yeah, let's--
LIAM: We'd have to go through that gap.
SAM: That's going to sound all kinds of alarms.
TALIESIN: Which--
MARISHA: Wait, what? Leaping and jumping?
LIAM: The only way through, correct me if I'm wrong--
SAM: If they see us go and jump, they're going to be like--
LIAM: -- is through the little area where the Reiloran is, right?
TRAVIS: The little ramp?
MATT: There is a ramp, a little area.
LIAM: But we have to go through here, correct?
MATT: Or you can try and go further.
SAM: If we leave them alive, they're going to warn everybody.
MATT: If you want to try and go over the edge and then climb down--
TRAVIS: Do you think we need to go take them out?
MATT: -- there's a bit of a sheer drop of about 20 feet.
SAM: I think-- But you could try it.
TRAVIS: Because we are dressed like Ruby Vanguard.
ASHLEY: We should try it.
LIAM: Let's do that then.
LAURA: Let's do that. We're going to try to go over the edge where they don't see over the edge.
TRAVIS: I think we should try--
ASHLEY: Off the side.
TRAVIS: -- to go around and then start walking.
LIAM: But we're not invisible.
MARISHA: We're dressed like Ruby Vanguard.
MATT: You're not invisible. You're all trying to stealth across an open intersection.
LAURA: Okay, okay, maybe stop.
MATT: They're both there. You can make it work, but just letting you know.
LAURA: We should do the tent thing! (laughs)
MARISHA: Or the blast thing!
LIAM: What's the blast thing?
LAURA and ASHLEY: The blast thing?
MARISHA: Where Fearne makes an explosion and we all pretend like we're Ruby Vanguard that got hit by it and we're all like: (dramatic screaming)
LAURA: Oh yeah, do that!
MARISHA: Then I Feather Fall it--
LAURA: This is all in our heads! Yeah, let's do that!
MARISHA: -- at the very end.
ASHLEY: All right.
LAURA: Yes.
ASHLEY: Wait, I'm making an explosion?
TRAVIS: Down the middle of the thing?
LAURA: Yeah, but explode the tent and we fly backwards.
MARISHA: We're like: Whoa!
LAURA: Yeah, do it.
TALIESIN: This is the weirdest mental conversation we've ever had.
TRAVIS: What tent? Are you talking about the one on the ground?
LAURA: The one we were just in, like we got exploded out of it.
ASHLEY: What am I exploding?
MARISHA: Just make a blast, like we got hit by a bomb.
SAM: Wait, wait.
TRAVIS: Can I pause time?
MARISHA: We all--
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Are you talking about-- Just, timeout. Are you talking about exploding--
LIAM: We'll be blown in an arc?
TRAVIS: -- the tent over the ridge?
LAURA: No, no, no. Exploding the tent and then we look like we got blown backwards.
TRAVIS: Which direction?
MARISHA: Over into the ridge.
LIAM: They think--
TRAVIS: Towards Matt?
LIAM: -- we can make believable this blown to here.
MARISHA: Then I cast Feather Fall right before we land. So it looks like we got hit by a blast.
TRAVIS: You're talking about going over the ridge and down through the middle of the whole shebang, like an express elevator to the bottom?
MARISHA: Yeah.
SAM: While we're going: (dramatic screaming)
MARISHA: (dramatic screaming)
SAM: And hope that nobody asks what happened?
ASHLEY: Inside the tent?
MARISHA: We look like we got hit by a bomb, by the resistance!
ASHLEY: Inside the tent, or we're all just free-falling?
MARISHA: I think we just go to the edge and you go boom.
TRAVIS: You cast Fly on everybody?
ASHLEY: We just free fall? Okay.
SAM: (groans) I don't like it.
MARISHA: I can cast Feather Fall on everybody.
TRAVIS: No, no, I'm just talking about the getting up through the air part.
MATT: The tent is about 70 feet from the edge.
TRAVIS: Yeah, it's a long way.
MARISHA: No, no, no. Ignore the tent. Ignore the tent. Just boom.
ASHLEY: No, just a boom.
MARISHA: We all go: (dramatic scream)
ASHLEY: Yeah, just a boom right there.
LAURA: We sell it like a "Star Trek" stunt.
MATT: I love it.
MARISHA: Like a "Star Trek" stunt.
MARISHA: Whatever you want to do.
ASHLEY: I'm into it. I'm into it.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: Can you get everybody in the air?
LAURA: Do we need to get in the air?
MARISHA: We all just jump off the edge.
SAM: Can't you be a bird?
LAURA: We just jump, we fly ourselves.
MARISHA: Yeah.
SAM: Can't you be a bird?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
SAM: Yeah, she can be a bird.
LAURA: This is bad, this is really bad.
SAM: It's going to be great.
MATT: No, no, I love it.
SAM: It's going to be great.
MATT: What do you want to do?
LAURA: Are we doing it?
MARISHA: Matt likes it. (laughs)
SAM: We have to do something.
MARISHA: We got to do something.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay.
SAM: So it's either that, or we attack them or one of us tries--
MARISHA: Attacking them is going to be a nightmare.
SAM: Or we try to convince them that there's danger over there that they need to go check out.
MARISHA: They already know there's danger over there.
LAURA: What if-- Oh, what if we--
TALIESIN: They're not leaving their posts.
LAURA: -- explode and then-- Oh god, no.
ASHLEY: All right.
TRAVIS: Right now, they're--
MARISHA: Let's just do it.
TRAVIS: -- looking at a soon-to-be extinguished Pâté. We could move past.
MATT: Pâté's gone.
TRAVIS: Get down on the ramp.
MARISHA: Okay.
LIAM: If we go running off the edge, which I'm all for--
MATT: Looks at its fist.
LIAM: We're going to be made, right? But we'll be beelining it towards our target.
TRAVIS: We will, but I thought we were trying to get there into the bridge and up the bridge without being pursued and chased the entire time.
SAM: Distract or take these guys out or get around them without them seeing us.
MARISHA: But they won't question it if they think that we got hit.
TRAVIS: That's not ever fucking going to happen.
MARISHA: Why not?
LIAM: This goes on, there's people everywhere.
SAM: (disappointed sigh)
LAURA: Okay.
SAM: I admire your chutzpah.
ASHLEY: I like this idea, too. It's fine.
MARISHA: The witches are on the same page.
ASHLEY: The witches are on the same page.
TRAVIS: This is a democracy, so we should vote.
ASHLEY: If this goes south, it's not our fault.
LAURA: Can I--? Oh, no, they're going to notice if I do that.
SAM: I'm thinking if there's any other things that we can do.
ASHLEY: Let's see, let's see.
MARISHA: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Oh lord.
MARISHA: It's just crazy enough.
TRAVIS: They'll definitely send medics to us at the very least and then when they try and check us out as we're trying to get on the bridge to the moon--
MARISHA: There's too much going on with the medics.
MATT: Chetney, as you are clutching on the side of the rock and you're having this conversation, you see this faint flash of blue and you see the runes start coming online on the warder.
LAURA: Uh-oh, we got to hurry.
TRAVIS: Telepathic and I'm like "It's starting to come back online."
LAURA: We got to go.
SAM: We can attack these guys and I can cast Silence around us so nobody hears the fight.
LIAM: Goddamn it!
SAM: No?
LIAM: I was fishing for Silence 20 minutes ago.
SAM: I'm sorry.
TRAVIS: Let's do that.
SAM: I didn't know I prepared it.
LAURA: Cast Silence right now.
ASHLEY: How far?
SAM: Okay, I'm going to cast Silence right between the two dudes.
LIAM: The Reilorans, correct?
SAM: The Reilorans.
TALIESIN: They're telepathic.
ASHLEY: Yeah, but there's that magic ball. Is that going to do something?
LAURA: I don't know.
TRAVIS: That's okay. At least they can talk to each other outside of it.
MATT: So right there?
LIAM: No, thoughts can go out of Silence.
SAM: Yes.
MARISHA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: So they can alert everyone, okay.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's a good point. They can still alert.
MATT: You finish focusing on the spell.
LIAM: They've got comms.
MATT: You now see two of them--
SAM: Shit.
MATT: Are--
LAURA: Oh god, that's so dumb.
TRAVIS: No, this is fine. This is fine.
SAM: Okay, okay.
MATT: They don't notice anything.
SAM: Yeah?
MATT: But you see the one that's holding one hand onto the side of the device and is looking out at it coming back online, the large hulking Reiloran juggernaut is at the edge right now. It's right above where you're halfway up the, it's full-on Nazgûl-ing you and you're inside the tree hole in "Fellowship." It's just right above you looking over outward while the rest of you are right by this ballista. What are you going to do?
TRAVIS: I'm going to use my bonus action to cast Blood Curse of Binding at the Juggernaut right up above the lip, which is going to reveal my position, but it means he won't be able to move for a turn.
MATT: Mm-hmm.
ASHLEY: Cool.
SAM: Okay.
MATT: Well, the good news is, the one defender down, the Vanguard member there doesn't even see you. He's faced away from you, trying to figure out how this device, how this massive automaton has been essentially disabled and is now slowly coming back online. So it's his constitution saving throw? Is that was it is with Blood Curse?
TRAVIS: Yeah, it's a con-- I'm sorry, strength saving throw.
LAURA: There's so many things--
MATT: Strength saving throw. Okay.
LAURA: -- we could have done.
MATT: He has a high strength, but rolled a low four, so--
TRAVIS: Oh, amazing.
TRAVIS and LIAM: Whoa!
MARISHA: You liked this idea 10 seconds ago and now you don't!
SAM: I did, but it isn't-- I do, I like it. It's just--
MARISHA: (laughs)
SAM: Wait, how did we get from the tent all the way over there?
MARISHA: No, no, we'll move and then Fearne makes it seem like a blast and then we get blasted.
MATT: Well--
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: It's a little too late now because things are happening!
MATT: You go ahead and--
LAURA: It doesn't matter!
MARISHA: I think it would work!
MATT: -- release this curse upwards, and the juggernaut stands there, looking down confused at its legs.
TRAVIS: I'm kicking us off, yeah?
TALIESIN: Yep.
LAURA: Yeah, I mean, that happened.
SAM: I guess so.
TRAVIS: Since that's my bonus action, I'm going to use the rest--
ASHLEY: Figure it out.
TRAVIS: -- of my speed to crawl up.
MATT: Okay. Just for the hell of it, make an athletics check for me.
TRAVIS: Yes. Not at advantage because I'm not a werewolf.
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: 14 plus eight. 22.
MATT: 22, easy enough. You dart up the side. But you are now visible from casting that.
TALIESIN: What the fuck?
LAURA: Can't we do an explosion and we jump while the explosion goes off?
SAM: We could do that.
LAURA: I mean, that's about the same thing, right?
MARISHA: That's what I'm saying.
LAURA: We just run away from the fight.
SAM: Yeah, we could make it look like Chetney's the lone attacker and we're all caught in his sabotage.
MATT: Put you over here for now.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's good, too. Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah.
MATT: Chetney? You just dart up on the side?
SAM: Anybody have a bomb? (laughs)
TRAVIS: Are we not attacking these guys?
SAM: Yeah, you are.
MARISHA: Fearne is a bomb.
TRAVIS: Okay, great. Yeah, I'll take two--
MARISHA: Fearne is a bomb!
ASHLEY: Yeah, I can do some fire. I can make something, some loud noises. Because if--
TRAVIS: I'm going to take two--
LIAM: We got to commit to something.
TRAVIS: -- actually, I'll take three strikes--
LAURA: Yeah, we got to commit.
TRAVIS: -- at him with my--
ASHLEY: We got to commit.
MATT: The juggernaut? Go for it.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: Three strikes.
LIAM: This is our team, over by the rock.
MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)
MATT: (laughs)
TRAVIS: 25 to hit on the first one.
MATT: That hits.
TRAVIS: Second one is 17 plus a-- 27 to hit.
MATT: That hits.
TRAVIS: Last one is 18 to hit.
MATT: Yeah, all three hit.
TRAVIS: 18 hits on the juggernaut?
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Oh, dope. Okay.
MATT: Yeah, he's got some armor, but he's also a fairly broad fellow.
TRAVIS: 10, five, 15 on the first one. Nine on the second one, so 24. And five, 10--
MARISHA: Oh!
ASHLEY: Do we want to make this real obvious?
TRAVIS: 10 on the last one, so 34 points of damage.
LAURA: I'm going to cast Fly on myself.
TRAVIS: No Crimson Rite on any of those yet because I didn't do it.
MATT: Yeah, no worries.
LAURA: I'm casting Fly on myself.
MATT: Fly on yourself.
LAURA: Uh-huh.
MATT: All righty.
LAURA: I'm going to float up and land on this rock right here.
LIAM: (scoffs) Casters.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Land right here.
LIAM: Casters are so quick.
LAURA: I'm going to, in Chet's head, I'm going to say: Go with me.
SAM: Oh boy. Oh boy.
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: I'm going to--
SAM: Oh boy.
LAURA: -- point at him, hold my head, and go: Stop!
TRAVIS: (uncertain yelp)
LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to look over at the Reilorans.
MATT: Make a deception check.
LAURA: Come on.
TRAVIS: (dramatic choked groans)
ASHLEY and LIAM: Come on.
LIAM: This is your bag, your whole bag!
LAURA: Okay. 20.
MATT: 20, okay. The juggernaut that has been struck a bunch turns and makes this growl under its mouth, or it would, but no sound comes out as it turns. It lifts a fist up, looks back in your direction.
LAURA: One of the attackers.
SAM: Are you saying this or thinking it?
LAURA: I'm thinking it.
SAM: Okay.
MATT: Yeah. You can see the juggernaut is now preparing to grab Chetney.
LAURA: No, before he does, I'm going to-- Oh god. Oh god! What a fucking waste. Are you kidding me? I'm going to cast Telekinesis, and I'm going to grab Chet.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Pull him over to me.
MATT: Do you resist?
TRAVIS: Her Telekinesis?
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Yeah! No.
LAURA: No. (laughter)
MATT: All right, so as the juggernaut, both massive hands out, its bone cestus around its knuckles reaching out to try and grab you. You just, (whooshes) get lifted off the ground, your arms held at the side.
TRAVIS: No, no, no!
MATT: You get shunted over to where Imogen is.
TRAVIS: Snap my neck, snap my neck!
ASHLEY: All right.
MARISHA: I might be able to do--
TRAVIS: Snap my neck!
MARISHA: Snap my neck?! (laughs)
LIAM: (laughs)
SAM: Do it!
TRAVIS: Do it, you dirty bitch! Do it! (laughter)
LAURA: I'm going to pretend like I snap his neck.
TRAVIS: (snap) (grunts)
MATT: Okay, you make a deception check. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Oh, that's not at advantage, I'm sorry.
LAURA and MARISHA: (laugh)
TRAVIS: I wanted it to be. 15.
MATT: 15. Given all the circumstances here, as you (snaps) (laughter)
MATT: This is "True Lies" level where Arnold barely touches somebody and they're (cracks).
ASHLEY: Yes!
LAURA: (dramatic death)
TRAVIS: I let a little pee run down my leg.
MATT: Yep.
MARISHA: (laughs)
ASHLEY: All right.
MATT: You all watch as the juggernaut watches you swish over, watches you make that motion with your hand, and your neck snap, and both of them look over and give a nod and stand there at the bases.
MARISHA: I'm going to combo spell with you.
ASHLEY: Yes! I was going to say--
MARISHA: At the same time--
MATT: Do you drop your Blood Curse?
ASHLEY: -- we can do combos.
MARISHA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TRAVIS: Yes.
MATT: Okay. So with that, the juggernaut puts his arms down like he's a little frustrated he didn't get the action on that one and then turns around and starts-- (heavy pounding)
TALIESIN: Let's take it down.
MATT: -- heading back.
LAURA: Let's go, let's go.
TALIESIN: Take it down!
ASHLEY: Great, great, great.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: All right, so--
LIAM: Step two.
MARISHA: What is the Reiloran doing?
TALIESIN: We can just drop it.
MATT: It's still standing there with its hand on the device, but you can see it's starting to notice something's odd about the space around it.
LIAM: It's hand is on the device?
SAM: Should I drop Silence?
LAURA: I'm going to-- I'll wave my hand and act like I'm dropping Silence.
TALIESIN: Drop it.
LAURA: Now drop Silence.
TRAVIS: Why?
SAM: Well, I don't know.
TALIESIN: Do it, do it.
SAM: Well, we're going to have a big blast here.
TALIESIN: No, we're not. No, we should just walk down.
LAURA: Are we still going to do that?
TALIESIN: Just walk the fuck down.
SAM: Are we trying to do that? What are we doing?
LAURA: I'm going to use--
TALIESIN: Just walk down!
LAURA: -- Telekinesis to pick up Chet, like I'm just holding him in the air.
TALIESIN: Yes!
LAURA: Be limp. (laughs)
MARISHA: Unless you want to try and--
TRAVIS: That's so hard for me to do.
LAURA and SAM: (laugh)
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: Unless you want to try and be like: "Go to the fray" to us and we just run in.
SAM: Yeah, we could tell them to go--
MARISHA: You're our commander.
TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
TALIESIN: The guy in-- Yeah.
LIAM: A group of hidden soldiers go--
LAURA: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Yeah, we're here.
TALIESIN: Signal us in. We work for you, clearly.
SAM: Fog of war, fog of war!
LAURA: Sure.
SAM: I'll drop Silence then.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: As a bonus action, I'm going to--
ASHLEY: We can all take him--
SAM: -- give you a Bonded Blessing.
LAURA: Okay.
SAM: So you get an extra d6 on any roll you want.
LAURA: I'll wave to everyone else--
TALIESIN: Yep.
LAURA: -- to come up. I'll look at the Reiloran. This is so dumb.
SAM: Wait, why are you doing this? She's the charismatic one!
LAURA: I'm the deceptive one.
ASHLEY: Oh, okay, okay. I'm not good at deception.
LAURA: Jesus Christ!
SAM: Okay.
MATT and MARISHA: (laugh)
LAURA: I'll get the Reiloran.
SAM: Wait, I'm the--
LAURA: In his head I'm-- (laughs) I'm the--
MARISHA: Apparently I'm intimidating!
LAURA: I'm going to think to him.
MATT: How have you all survived this long?
ASHLEY: (laughs)
TRAVIS: That is the question.
LIAM: This is why the most powerful people in Exandria have placed their faith in us. (laughter)
MATT: Three campaigns in a row!
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: I'm going to say: He wasn't alone. Search for more. I'll look over at my group and say: Spread out.
ASHLEY: Okay. (laughter)
MATT: Verbally?
TRAVIS: Roger, roger.
ASHLEY: Roger, I'm doing it. (laughter)
ASHLEY: You got it.
LAURA: No, I'll--
TALIESIN: Are we spreading out or are we all walking in?
MARISHA: Just go in! We'll just go in.
LAURA: I'll say "Spread out" with my brain, but y'all know I'm saying spread out.
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: I'm going to confidently start going over the edge. Just walking like I was told to.
MARISHA: Me too. I follow Fearne.
LAURA: But look like you're looking for invisible people.
ASHLEY: I'm looking.
MATT: Okay. I would like a group deception check.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MARISHA: Yeah!
MATT: Because this is a--
ASHLEY: Guidance.
MATT: -- group deceptive journey.
TRAVIS: Nope, just--
SAM: You've got an extra d6 if you need it, Laurz.
TALIESIN: I suck at deception.
MARISHA: No!
LIAM: Me too.
MARISHA: Why is this happening to me?
LIAM: Oh, thank you!
ASHLEY: (groans)
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: All righty. Well, you actually, you won't have to make it. You've already--
TRAVIS: But I'm selling it!
LAURA: You're dead.
TRAVIS: I peed on myself for this roll.
MATT: I know. You're just limp on this one.
TRAVIS: Yeah, but I peed on my leg.
LAURA: What did you roll? What did you roll?
MATT: You did!
TRAVIS: 21.
LAURA: Oh, that's good.
MATT: Yeah, but it doesn't help for this one.
TRAVIS: (groans in protest)
LAURA and LIAM: (laugh)
MATT: Laudna.
MARISHA: Natural one.
LIAM: Oh!
LAURA: Ugh, goddamn it.
MARISHA: Second in a row.
MATT: All right, FCG.
SAM: 23.
MATT: 23, all righty.
TALIESIN: Spread out and then we'll walk right down.
ASHLEY: 15! That's really good.
MATT: 15. (laughter)
TRAVIS: That's good.
MARISHA: That's really good!
ASHLEY: It's a really good--
TRAVIS: Thank you for letting him know.
LAURA: Also 23.
ASHLEY: -- average.
MATT: Also 23.
ASHLEY: What we needed. That's what we needed.
LIAM: 19. (laughs)
MATT: 19, okay.
TALIESIN: 10.
LAURA: Okay.
TALIESIN: It's great for me.
TRAVIS: Yeah, baby. Yeah.
ASHLEY: No!
TALIESIN: I've got negative two.
ASHLEY: That's good, that's good.
LAURA: Wow!
ASHLEY: That's good, that's good.
TALIESIN: I keep telling people!
LIAM: Okay, here comes the aftermath.
MARISHA: When in doubt, we explode ourselves. (laughs)
MATT: That guy--
ASHLEY: Yes, when in doubt, we'll make an explosion.
MATT: -- has now gotten back to his feet.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: As you're all approaching past here, gathering up.
ASHLEY: Right this way.
LIAM: There's interlopers coming from inside.
MATT: Heading over in this direction. You watch as the Reiloran scans past. Its burrow frows as it glances over at you.
MARISHA: Oh!
MATT: I need you--
MARISHA: To me? Okay.
MATT: Yes.
MARISHA: That's perfect.
MATT: I need you to immediately make a strength saving throw.
TALIESIN: Do they fly?
MATT: Make a strength saving throw.
SAM: Oh god.
TRAVIS: Make it! (laughs)
TALIESIN: Do Reilorans fly?
MARISHA: This is not good. This is not good, y'all.
LIAM: I don't think we've seen that.
TALIESIN: Okay.
MARISHA: 13.
LIAM: We saw hovering.
LAURA: That's really good for you.
MATT: 13.
MARISHA: It is. I rolled a 15.
MATT: It takes its hand and does this with it, and as it does you watch as Laudna (forceful hurl) gets lifted off the ground, arcs about eight or so feet in the air before falling nearly prone back this way and barely catching herself. Then immediately it goes ahead and pulls a club, and then all the rest of you in your heads hear from it saying, "Interlopers!"
LIAM: Orym, hearing that, is going to run straight through Ashton's legs towards the edge, and I am going to use Seedling to grab the Reiloran's arm and yank it away from the device and pull him back and away.
ASHLEY: Nice, nice.
MATT: Okay. So it's a dexterity saving throw for it?
LIAM: Yes.
TALIESIN: Do you want some assistance?
MATT: That's going to be a 13.
LIAM: Fail.
MATT: All right, so you move back and--
TALIESIN: Never mind.
MATT: -- you pull it away from the device. It (grunts) gets its hand ripped away from it.
LAURA: Fuck!
MATT: All right.
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: He said interloper? Jeez.
TALIESIN: I'm going-- Are we doing this? I'm going to-- Are we being watched by anybody? Clear, clear?
MATT: (laughs) Best you can tell, there's the one down there--
TRAVIS: Inside the storm.
MATT: -- that's still helping the last bits of the Warder back up.
TRAVIS: I really want to use the ballista.
MATT: You're uncertain about the current awareness of the juggernaut, or whatever the figure over there is. So, what are you doing?
TALIESIN: I'm going to run--
SAM: Before we fight-- (uncertain moan)
TALIESIN: What? This is not necessarily a fight. I'm going to come-- I'm going to run straight at the guy really quick, take those first couple steps, and I'm going to try and I actually have a thing that, if I can make contact and knock prone because I have a feature. I have a trait.
MATT: Sure.
TALIESIN: Which is--
LIAM: I just have no idea what that is.
TALIESIN: I can move somebody five feet into-- Actually, how many steps was that straight towards him?
MATT: I'll say from back here it's about five, 10, 15, 20.
TRAVIS: I think it's for an airship.
LIAM: I do too, but I don't know.
TALIESIN: Oh, not 25 then. Damn.
MATT: I mean, you could back up if you want to get--
TALIESIN: Oh, I'll back up five and then do it.
MATT: You can do that. You can do like so.
TALIESIN: I'm going to do the push him five feet prone.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Shove him five feet prone. It's a standard attack.
MATT: All right, go ahead and-- Well, you're just giving him a shove?
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm trying to just knock him prone.
MATT: Okay, so it's your athletics versus his athletics or--
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: So that'll be--
TALIESIN: Technically-- Well, okay.
MATT: Actually versus his acrobatics.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Because yeah, I have a thing. I can even do that as a hit, I think.
ASHLEY: I can't believe you're attacking members of the Vanguard!
TALIESIN: Why are you doing that? Oh.
MATT: (laughs)
SAM: (as Fearne) Of the Vanguard!
MARISHA: (laughs)
TALIESIN: That's 17.
MATT: 17. You back up and rush in and shoulder slam them into the side. Falls tumbling onto this edge here, prone. It is the edge. I'm going to give him a dexterity save to see if he can keep himself standing there.
SAM: Is he falling off?
LAURA: Maybe.
MATT: That's a natural four. Immediately (thuds) and tumbles down out of sight. You see him drop about a good 15 or so feet (crashing) into the ground (grunts) and is now on his side.
LIAM: No floaty float.
LAURA: We go. We go now.
TALIESIN: I'm going. I'm going straight down.
MATT: He does take 10 points of bludgeoning damage from the fall. All righty.
TALIESIN: I'm going straight down, as quickly as I can.
MATT: After him?
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LIAM: Well, wait, are we doing the whole-- (leaping arc)
LAURA: Do I see--
MARISHA: There's 150 feet of switchbacks that we got to deal with.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: Unless we stuntman.
LAURA: Unless we just fly, yeah.
MARISHA: Unless we-- (laughs)
LIAM: Oh, is that a running jump or Fly?
MARISHA: Or we run and jump.
TALIESIN: I'm--
LAURA: If I saw him go off the side, though, can I go over to the edge where he went?
MATT: If you want to.
TALIESIN: I'm going to drop down.
LAURA: And see where the guy landed?
MATT: So the rest of you can try and get up to the edge here if you want to as your reactions. If anyone wants to do anything else as a reaction to this--
LAURA: I do, I want to use my Telekinesis, which is still up and I imagine is no longer needing to hold Chet.
MATT: Well, Chetney's been floating over here limp and you just drop him. (thumping)
LAURA: (laughs) Shit. (laughter)
TALIESIN: The faster we're out--
LAURA: Sorry, Chet.
TALIESIN: -- of sight of all these people the better.
LAURA: Can I try to Telekinesis this--
MATT: Take two points bludgeoning damage.
LAURA: Oh, sorry, Chet. That pillar?
MATT: Which one?
LAURA: The big--
ASHLEY: With the ball?
LAURA: With the ball.
LIAM: The ball.
MATT: Right there?
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: What about it? You're looking to--
TRAVIS: ♪ (singing "Bom Diggy") ♪
LAURA: I want to grab it, up to 1,000 pounds. I don't know how heavy it is.
MATT: Okay. You're going to try and lift it?
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: Wow.
LAURA: Topple it over. I want to topple it over towards the guy that just fell down in the cavern.
LIAM: Oof.
MATT: Go ahead and roll a d20 and add your charisma modifier to it. This is going to essentially be the force of your magical will versus the strength of what moors this device to the rock. It's too heavy to lift, but it may not be too heavy to shove.
SAM: You have your d6. Maybe, if he'll let you use it.
LAURA: That would be a 22.
MATT: 20 was what you needed.
LAURA and ASHLEY: Yes!
MATT: As you drift over on the side, you stand there and barely make a shift motion with your wrist. As you do, you all hear (metal scraping) as the metal on the outside of this arcane device crushes inward, shifts, and then-- (massive shifting stone)
ASHLEY: Awesome.
MATT: -- falls off in an arc. You watch as the Reiloran starts getting up on one knee. Before it can even notice or react--
SAM: Stay down.
MATT: -- it just (heavy crash)
SAM: Oh no!
MATT: Crushes it.
ASHLEY: Yes!
MATT: It does not even have enough hit points to survive that. It is just done. This device is gone.
ASHLEY: Nice, nice!
LIAM: We got to move now.
LAURA: We got to move now.
LIAM: That was loud.
TALIESIN: I say mentally: If we get caught, tell them someone's using magical damage so that they find somebody who's planting magical damage.
LAURA: Sure, let's move.
SAM: I really think we go over to the bulletin board where they have how many days since an accident.
MARISHA: (laughs)
SAM: I just make it zero. (laughter)
LAURA: Let's go, let's go, let's go!
TRAVIS: He doesn't perceive it?
MATT: The juggernaut does not hear it. He rolls--
TALIESIN: Windy.
ASHLEY: Yes!
MATT: -- super fricking low.
LAURA: It was so windy. Let's go.
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: Are we jumping?
TALIESIN: We're going.
LIAM: Yes.
MARISHA: Do we want to jump or do we want to take the switchbacks and walk?
TRAVIS: Again, if you jump down the middle of it--
LAURA: People are going to notice.
TRAVIS: -- and base jump, everybody knows.
LAURA: Start with the switchbacks.
SAM: But it would be so cool!
MARISHA: Exactly!
MATT: Just "Halo" jump into the middle of it.
ASHLEY: Halo jump in and then make a run for it.
MARISHA: We'll start with the switchbacks, but we're still going to probably have to deal with people all along the way.
LAURA: Sure, if we get, but if we run into trouble, then we dive off the side. That's all fall-safe.
MARISHA: That's our fall-safe.
SAM: Our fall-safe?
LIAM: We're in the skies right now, and we're past--
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: We are.
LIAM: No one saw us walk up.
MARISHA: Disguises are bullshit, though. They never fucking work.
LAURA: It never works.
LIAM: But maybe now's the time.
MARISHA: (laughs) Okay, let's just walk.
LAURA: Only because we roll ones.
TALIESIN: Are we now clear?
MARISHA: Yeah, well, twice in a row.
MATT: Well, you'll appear from this board edge for the time being.
TALIESIN: Is there--
LAURA: Go, go! Just go!
TALIESIN: There's no second to shuffle through the Reiloran's shit? Never mind.
LAURA: Aw.
SAM: You're going to go through pockets?
TALIESIN: I wanted to, but no, we have no time. We should--
ASHLEY: On the way down?
MATT: Okay.
SAM: Mage Hand it.
LAURA: He's squished.
TALIESIN: I don't have Mage--
MARISHA: 20 feet down and crushed.
MATT: So in the midst of the sounds of combat, the crashes of thunder that you hear rolling in the distance.
TRAVIS: ♪ Thunder ♪
MATT: The only real strong light source in this area now is the Bloody Bridge itself. Most of the midday sunlight has been choked off by Keyleth's storm other than the occasional flashes of lightning which themselves give these bursts of diffused, blueish-white light in the middle of this dense dust storm. You gather your cloth and gather your disguise and begin to trudge down the first switchback that descends about 20 or so feet before it arcs back, and you can see this is now one large, descending, curved pathway. There's multiple of these that corkscrew down the different wall edges. Some of them switchback a few times. This one seems to be almost one continuous one. It does switchback about two thirds of the way down.
LIAM: How is Orym's eyes for seeing others here? Always, but threats around? How well can we see all sides of this giant?
MATT: Not very well in the middle of the storm.
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: I mean, you can make out the shapes of things because of the sheer volume of light that's being given off by the Malleus Key. But it's mainly, it's like seeing the shadow shapes of structures from this high up. Enough where you know where you're going and you can make out the general shape of the environment and the occasional shapes of people and things moving through it, but they're little shifting shadows in the middle of the dust storm.
LIAM: Do I see any big boy robots through the storm?
MATT: Make a perception check.
TALIESIN: Imogen.
LAURA: Huh?
TALIESIN: You can hear brains, right?
LAURA: I'm hearing yours.
LIAM: 26.
TALIESIN: If you hear other peoples' brains coming close--
MATT: With disadvantage, technically.
LIAM: Then that's much less.
MATT: Because the dust storm does reduce it, so.
LIAM: So that's 15.
TALIESIN: Just if anyone sounds--
MATT: It's a 15? Okay.
TALIESIN: -- like they're getting close, maybe.
LAURA: Yeah, I can do that.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: Well, you rolled with advantage, right?
LIAM: I did.
MATT: The disadvantage would make it just a singular roll?
LIAM: I took the lower of the two. Should I--
MATT: Oh, so reroll again. Just one dice, though.
LIAM: Now it's a 20.
MATT: Okay, so. As intense as this is, you do see a few other shapes, there are Warders, I mean, many of them, you can see maybe probably about 20 or so that are clustered on the opposite side, all gathered and rushing in towards the fray. Looking down, you can see there's one of them that's part way up the path where you are, but it's more towards the bottom. You can see by-- Because of the bright light that the Malleus Key and the bridge is giving off in the center, you can see two of them that are flanking the base of it, as well as a handful of other figures that are currently guarding the center of the Key, with other patrols going through. You also see other figures that are moving out of those side cavern barracks that are built into the sides of the massive pit that are rushing out to both see what's happening and join the conflict that's currently now continuing to build and crescendo.
LIAM: Okay, so, mentally, the good news is we're as hidden from them as they are from us, but there's, was two Warders down at the bottom, and who knows what?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: All right.
MARISHA: Just rely on deception checks.
LAURA: Worst case, we say what? We have to get to-- We have to get to Ruidus to warn them of the attack.
LIAM: Do you think you could convince them that you are your mother?
LAURA: I've tried it before. They should know that she's there, but.
SAM: Can we disguise you more to look like your mom?
LAURA: (uncertain sigh)
LIAM: I don't know.
LAURA: I don't know.
LIAM: A hood up in the storm?
SAM: Do we have illusion spells, does anyone have--
LAURA: I don't have anything like that.
SAM: Do you?
MARISHA: Not like that, not a disguise one.
LIAM: Maybe in the storm, we don't need it.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah.
SAM: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Let's just try the good, old-fashioned way.
LIAM: We think as we creep.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: Continuing to creep down.
LAURA: We say to each other as, yeah.
MARISHA: Also as we creep, Treshi scry ball.
MATT: Oh yeah, got you.
ASHLEY: That's right.
MATT: Nothing.
MARISHA: Okay.
ASHLEY: ♪ Creep, yeah ♪
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: All right, as you descend down this arc, you can hear ballista being fired at different sides, and you see some of these other arcane devices charging up, and you see them firing bolts of lightning that arcs out for hundreds of feet (flare shooting) off in the direction of where this massive battle is happening, and disappearing into the storm, and you hear cries. They are making a pageantry of this.
SAM: The devices that are firing lightning, do they look like the tower that we just toppled?
MATT: Yes.
SAM: Okay.
LAURA: Okay. Well, at least we got one of them.
LIAM: The chances of them peeling their guards off of the door itself,
TALIESIN: Unlikely.
LIAM: -- the bridge itself are unlikely. So, I think our best shot is you, and they're either going to believe you or not, and we're in a fight or not.
LAURA: I think we walk confidently and quickly.
LIAM: Uh-huh.
LAURA: If you act like you belong somewhere, people tend to believe it.
LIAM: Right, it's like we're getting into a party at E3.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Wow. Too real.
LIAM: 15 years ago.
LAURA: Comic-Con. Like we did-- (laughter)
MATT: The most "Metal Gear Solid" moments of my life.
LIAM: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Suit will get you into a lot of places.
MARISHA: All right.
MATT: All righty.
MARISHA: Let's do it, walking confidently.
TALIESIN: Do we have Fast Friends ready just in case?
SAM: I do. I have one, I can Fast Friends somebody.
TALIESIN: We also have one more EMP, so that's good.
LAURA: I'm going to keep--
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: -- Open Mind up, basically, so that I can sense if anybody's getting close to us that I don't see.
MATT: Fair enough.
TALIESIN: Solid.
MATT: Descending down this rickety rocky outcropping where parts of the stone surrounding pit had been carved off to give a pathway. It widens in areas, it narrows in others. You head past a couple of tables that have been toppled, probably in the chaos of this, or the storm has blown them over, where a few people might have been posted along the ways that have currently abandoned it, or have moved on to other positions in this conflict. You come across a small cave on the left that as you glance in, appears to be empty. Eventually, you start getting close to that switchback about two thirds of the way down where you can see that one Warder was stationed in, or was walking, and you see it's walking alongside three other Vanguard members. No current Reilorans around them, but they're on an intersective point, in almost a familiar crossing of patrol paths as the first time since you came through.
LIAM: I just step aside and let them go.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
MARISHA: For sure.
LIAM: Giving way.
MARISHA: Just walk past them.
SAM: Are they walking up?
MATT: They're walking up, they're brusquely jogging. (laughs)
SAM: Okay.
MATT: There's not a lot of calm walking around these spaces outside of those that are posted to specific areas they can't leave.
LIAM: Just step up the side of the path and give them nods as they go.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
MATT: Okay. I'd like another group deception check as you pass by.
LIAM: Come on. Come on.
SAM: As we get ready for this, I will give you an extra d6, Ashley Johnson.
ASHLEY: (exhales) Okay.
LIAM: That rhymed.
MARISHA: You should've given it to me.
TALIESIN: Okay, cool, cool.
SAM: I can't because I didn't bond with you.
MARISHA: Goddamn it.
TALIESIN: I'm 18 at best, so--
MARISHA: I keep rolling like dog shit. My deception's not bad.
TRAVIS: Natural 20 for a 24.
LAURA: Nice.
TALIESIN: Thank god.
MARISHA: 10.
SAM: Well, that's better. 25.
LAURA: That's not--
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: 23.
LAURA: It's not a one.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: 18.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: Three.
SAM: I'm wrong, I had 21.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: It's not a one, but--
TALIESIN: Nine.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: My count is two.
TALIESIN: 18 is my max.
MATT: You move to the side as these figures drift past, and they pass over and look, locking eyes with some of you as they go. You can see the nervousness in their eyes, but also, they are looking over you for any sort of signs of recognition. But it looks like their need to be towards where most of this conflict is happening drives their attention more than their need to be scrutinizing.
ASHLEY: Yes!
MATT: As they begin to pass on by, the Warder looming past as it continues up from the direction you went.
ASHLEY: We did it, we did it, we can get in.
MATT: You switch back down the opposite direction.
TALIESIN: (nervous moan)
MATT: You begin to see now the tops of the ruins that surround the interior of this excavation site. Familiar, many of them a little worse for wear from last time you saw them, many of them that were destroyed in the destruction of the airship, many others that were destroyed as the construction of the expansion of the site around the Key. You can see there's even more tents and barracks. It's definitely been built to house more soldiers, and it's been built to be more of a defensive bastion through and through. There are multiple walls of defense. You can see there are a number of soldiers that move from place to place, that are now scattering out and heading back up the various walkways and ladder climbs, and such that lead out of the site. Two more begin to rush past in almost a sprint. I will say, everyone, do you want to try and dart past unseen, or do you want to try and pass it off as you belonging?
LIAM: Boy.
SAM: Guidance.
TRAVIS: I think we're-- (laughter)
MARISHA: I think, yeah.
TRAVIS: We're all in the garb, right?
LIAM: Are we within--
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: We'll try to blend.
TRAVIS: We should try to blend.
LIAM: Are we Pass Without a Traced right now?
ASHLEY: We are.
TALIESIN: We are still Pass Without a Traced.
ASHLEY: So, maybe we would have an easier time.
LAURA: Is there a place to duck in if they were running past us?
MATT: The rocky edge has many little outcrop, or you know, inlets, outcroppings, little alcoves--
LIAM: Sam and Frodo it? (cloaking)
MATT: -- and hidden cracks. There could be attempts to hide as they move past.
LAURA: Mm, I think we just put--
LIAM: I think this group is better at stealth than it is at deception overall.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Okay, let's do it.
MARISHA: Sure.
TRAVIS: Without being seen.
TALIESIN: If there's a good place--
LIAM: We've got Pass Without a Trace up.
TRAVIS: Slink past.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MARISHA: We'll find an alcove?
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: If there are places to hide, we'll do it.
MATT: So, you're all attempting to hold off to the side and stealth as they pass.
LIAM: Let them go by, yeah.
MATT: All right, I'd like a group stealth check, please.
LAURA: I guess if they're running fast, they aren't looking around very well.
LIAM: Are we getting, at this point, advantage from the storm or no?
LAURA: Plus a 10, plus 10.
MATT: No, you're lower in the area, but getting advantage, you're getting plus one from that, yeah.
LIAM: Plus Pass Without a Trace.
MATT: I will say at this point, you're not at advantage, because you're now inside the glowing light of the area.
TRAVIS: Do you want to borrow a dice?
MARISHA: Dude. (laughs)
TRAVIS: Two.
LAURA: Did you roll shit again?
SAM: Do you want to leave?
LAURA: You got Guidance.
MARISHA: I rolled a one--
TRAVIS: It's all over here.
MARISHA: A one, a five, and a three--
TRAVIS: It's really bad over there.
LAURA: Oh.
MARISHA: -- my past several rolls. So, I rolled a three, which brings me up to nine, which brings me up to, oh wait, do we have a advantage still?
ALL BUT MARISHA: No.
MARISHA: 19.
LAURA: That's not bad.
MARISHA: Fine.
LIAM: That's great.
MARISHA: But I rolled a three. (laughs)
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Okay.
LAURA: Did you use your Guidance, your skydinch?
MARISHA: My Guidance, I didn't. I'll hold off on that one, I'll hold off on Guidance, though.
LIAM: I offer you Guidance, my child.
MARISHA: But what, is that d4, Guidance?
SAM: It's a d4, it only lasts for one round.
LAURA: Yeah, you can't--
MARISHA: Oh no, oh, well then, yeah, let me add to that, let me add to that, that's right.
LAURA: It's not like an inspiration--
MARISHA: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
TALIESIN: Got that--
MARISHA: It's been a year. Okay, 19, 23.
LIAM: It's been three weeks.
ASHLEY: (laughs)
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: 39.
ASHLEY: All three weeks, it's been so long.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: I got spin.
ASHLEY: (laughs)
SAM: It was a long time ago that we did this. 21. (laughter)
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: I rolled a natural 20.
MATT: Ooh.
LAURA: Nice.
ASHLEY: Which brings me to 33.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Whoa.
LAURA: 20.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: 29.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: 28.
MATT: Okay, yeah.
LAURA: Yeah, we're better at--
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: You all dart on the edge of the cliffside, the dust that is coming through here battering, and enshrouding your cloaks with the same color as the surrounding rock. You hear the footfalls. (pattering)
ASHLEY: Totally Frodo Sam.
LAURA: We're better at stealth than the rest.
MATT: (running footsteps)
ASHLEY: Pass Without a Trace--
MATT: Darting past without taking interest with your troop. When you feel it's safe but a moment later, you dislodge, and continue down the rest of the switchback.
ASHLEY: (tiny quick footsteps)
TALIESIN: Very stealthy.
MATT: Heading a short time down on the right, there is a much larger cavern that opens onto the right-hand side that you hear two voices talking to each other. Any of you speak Marquesian?
SAM: I do.
LAURA: I do, too.
TALIESIN: I do, three.
MATT: Great.
SAM: (laughs)
MARISHA: I think just, no, I don't. I don't. (laughs)
MATT: One of them seems to be in the process of arguing whether or not it's more important for them to stay, or to try and be seen helping.
SAM: Oh wow.
MATT: The other says, "No, our job is important, we have to stay. Besides, don't leave me alone with them."
SAM: Oh boy.
MATT: You're just going to walk past this cave?
SAM: So, there's inner strife and conflict.
TRAVIS: What's their job? Why is it important?
LAURA: I know.
MARISHA: Are they with Reilorans?
TRAVIS: Yes!
LAURA: I do have an Open Mind up. Could I hear deeper thoughts?
MATT: You can try and push for them. Do you have to make eye contact to do so, or at least see them when you do so?
LIAM: Who's the sneakiest of us, is it you?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Probably Chet.
LIAM: Want to take a peek?
TRAVIS: Sure.
MARISHA: You're not invisible, right?
LAURA: I would hear the surface thoughts, so, whatever they're saying to each other, I would hear surface thoughts about what they're saying to each other.
MATT: Right.
LIAM: So, our job is to--
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: From when you can pick up, they're both anxious, and they're both afraid of getting in trouble. One of them is wanting to make at least a display of helping, while the other is firmly set in wanting to do their job as they were told. They're both feel uncomfortable with the presence of some Reiloran--
LAURA: Reilorans.
MATT: -- Reiloran proximity that's making them uncomfortable.
LAURA: Okay.
SAM: Should we go in, and arrest one for being a deserter?
LIAM: We just make Chetney take a walk to see if there's any point to going in there.
ASHLEY: Are we at the base or we're still at the switchback.
LAURA: We're still at the switchback.
MATT: You're now heading on-- but you're maybe 60 or so feet from the bottom as well.
TALIESIN: If their job's important, and maybe it's guarding--
TRAVIS: Maybe we just take a peek.
LIAM: I just want to know what's in there.
TALIESIN: Maybe guarding the elevator.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll take a peek.
LAURA: Yeah, take a peek.
TALIESIN: Maybe they want to get out of here.
TRAVIS: Also have that magical eye thing, and--
TALIESIN: We need to use the elevator?
LIAM: Is there a side quest in there?
SAM: Is there an elevator in there?
ASHLEY: Oh yeah.
TALIESIN: No, they might work with the fucking--
LIAM: Or they have a reattached Planerider.
TALIESIN: We don't know what they have.
TRAVIS: I'll move up to the edge of the threshold, because they're in a little inlet, right?
MATT: Looks like, yeah, and there's a number of these small caves all along this.
TRAVIS: I'll (exhales) pull out the little monocle, and I'll--
MARISHA: Oh, yeah.
TRAVIS: -- cast Arcane Eye into the room--
ASHLEY: Cool!
LIAM: Yes!
TRAVIS: -- that's invisible.
MARISHA: That's right, that's right.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: 30 feet.
ASHLEY: Cool, cool.
MATT: All right, so it drifts in. Go ahead and make a perception check for me.
TRAVIS: That's, ah, I take that. 15.
MATT: 15, okay, glancing inside here, there's low light from a couple of lanterns that are set on the side. You see some benches. What looks to be a prisoner, a soldier of some kind, armored, but their arms are taken off. Looks to be a man in maybe his mid-40s or so. Short white hair. Looks like he's been, his face is a bit swollen.
TRAVIS: Worked over.
MATT: He's been hurt a bit, but he is currently, has his shackles around his wrists, and his ankles that are attached. He is-- Goddamn it, Laura.
LAURA: No, no, you said he didn't have, you said no arms right, is what you said?
SAM: He did say no arms.
LIAM: No arms.
MATT: Did I?
LAURA: I was picturing a man with no arms, and then I realized you meant no armor.
MATT: I meant no arms in--
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: Sorry, I should've specified. No weapons.
LIAM: I had that thought, too. But I got over it.
LAURA: Yeah, no--
TRAVIS: Right.
LAURA: It took me that long to catch up, and I was, he didn't need no arms, because the whole time you're describing him, I'm, okay, he's been, I was just catching up.
MATT: No, it's a fair distinction I should make. When I say no arms, I mean no weapons--
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: -- on him. Sorry, he does have arms.
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: Thank you for deepening my immersion.
LAURA and MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: I'm sorry.
MATT: It's an important distinction. But he looks to be either unconscious, or at least unresponsive at the moment.
MARISHA: Is it Percy?
MATT: You see two--
TRAVIS: Does he seem familiar in any way?
MATT: No.
TRAVIS: Okay.
SAM: Is it Bertrand Bell?
MATT: But you know, fairly nice looking armor that has taken a number of hits and dents.
LIAM: Is it covered in jewels?
LAURA: (gasps)
MATT: You do also see these two other Vanguard figures that are sitting off on the side table, and as they're both keeping watch, you can see that palpable nervous energy of what to do, what to do, what to do. That's about the extent of what you see.
TRAVIS: Do those two individuals look armed?
MATT: Yes, they have weapons on them.
TRAVIS: Like--
SAM: But they also don't have any arms.
TRAVIS: -- bladed weapons, just basic arms, weapons?
MATT: One of those looks like they have two shortswords to each side. The other one has a glaive-like polearm leaning against the wall behind him. That's about it.
TRAVIS: No Reiloran that we can see?
MATT: No, there are two regular Reilorans--
TRAVIS: Oh, I'm sorry.
MATT: -- that are flanking the man who is--
TRAVIS: So, there's four people there.
LAURA: Oh, there's Reilorans in there as well.
LIAM: Four individuals.
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Shit.
TRAVIS: But that prisoner could be...
SAM: Useful?
TRAVIS: Important.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Could be helpful.
LAURA: We should definitely get that person free.
ASHLEY: Are you able to talk to them?
SAM: You should pop in, and--
LAURA: The Reilorans?
ASHLEY: No, the prisoner.
SAM: -- get them.
MARISHA: Well, hang on--
LAURA: I could try.
MARISHA: How are they reacting to the distraction, the assault? How much time do we feel like we have here?
MATT: Realistically, it's been maybe, I'll say three minutes.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: Three to four minutes.
SAM: If one-- Oh.
LIAM: What is this?
MATT: You're uncertain how long the ruse will remain, or they feel like they have to pull back.
LAURA: They said they think we'd have 30 minutes is what they said when we came in, they thought we would have around 30.
TRAVIS: Plus, unless we're taking him with us.
SAM: He might know stuff up there, he might've been there.
TRAVIS: Or had access to the Bridge--
LIAM: If we keep it quiet, fights are fast, so.
LAURA: We have to drop these Reilorans quickly. Are they juggernauts, or are they the skinny ones?
MATT: From what you can see in there, they both look to be-- They're different from any of the ones that you've encountered previously.
TRAVIS: Oh, son of a bitch.
MATT: They're thin, they're lithe. They wear headdresses that have these large mandibles that seem to pull out of the front of their mouth. But they're not-- you're uncertain if it's their mandibles, or it's just decoration. They have all manner of bladed spikes as part of their armor, this chest plate that looks segmented that's affixed to their body. They have blades that come out of arm gauntlets, these big bracers that have these Predator-like arced blades that come out on each side. They both have chains that wrap around the torso across each shoulder.
MARISHA: Jesus.
MATT: They're both leaned back against the wall, looking out, and occasionally looking at each other, and looking at the two Vanguard members, and staying quiet.
MARISHA: Can try and shake them out of the cave.
SAM: Well, if one, at least one of the Vanguard members is not really keen on staying there, two of us could go in, and be like, "Shift change," and at least get them out of the room. Then we'd have two of us in there to do a quick sneak attack on the Reilorans? Maybe Ashton?
TRAVIS: Yeah. I could go and hold down one of the Reilorans. I could grapple them.
TALIESIN: Once the two leave from the shift change, we can all get in there.
LIAM: That's a great idea, and then we bottleneck it, so that the two don't leave.
TRAVIS: When it comes out.
LIAM: Right?
TRAVIS: I mean, they've got telepathic shit, but I'm going to kick it off, right? Sounding good, the plan, for everybody, we rock?
SAM: Wait, you and who?
TRAVIS: I'm going to go?
LAURA: I'll go in like I'm a soldier, too.
SAM: Wait, wait, wait, wait--
LIAM: Our two fastest--
SAM: We should have the strong people go in.
LIAM: No, the deceptive people should go in.
ASHLEY: We have 30 minutes, or we have 10 to 13 minutes?
LAURA: Oh. Oh, is it 10 to 13?
ASHLEY: Because I feel like--
LAURA: That's what we had, 10 to 13?
ASHLEY: Percy might've said 10 to 13.
LAURA: Okay, we've got minutes.
SAM: 10 to 13, what a strange number.
LIAM: We're good. Smart, quick, and quiet.
LAURA: 10 to 13, and it's been about three, okay, good.
MATT: Yeah, a mass scale of conflict like this--
LIAM: You're on door duty.
MATT: -- doesn't last a long time without giving up the ghost.
ASHLEY: Sure, sure, sure.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay, here we go.
LAURA: Okay, so it's been about three.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
SAM: You're going in?
TRAVIS: I'll walk in the room.
LAURA: Me and Chetney, yeah.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: I'm going to bonus action give you another d6.
LAURA: Thank you.
SAM: Oh, how many times can I do that?
ASHLEY: Guidance.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: Okay, so the two of you enter?
TRAVIS: I'm just walking in--
ASHLEY: Oh, he's not sure.
TRAVIS: -- nonchalantly. I'm ♪ making my way ♪ towards the two Reilorans, little legs carrying me away.
MATT: Okay. As your footfalls become audible within the space, the two other Vanguard sit up in their chairs. The other stands up and grabs his glaive and both look over your direction, not recognizing either of you.
LAURA: I look at one of them. Shift change. In their head.
MATT: They both look at each other. Make a deception check.
LIAM: Come on.
TRAVIS: I'll keep casually walking, calmly getting as close as I can.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.
SAM: You can add a d6 if you need it.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay.
ASHLEY: I Guided you before you went in.
LIAM: Yeah, that's true.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay.
SAM: Oh my god, that's a lot of stacking.
LIAM: Thank god.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay. Nine plus-- 18.
MATT: 18.
LIAM: She rolled a two.
LAURA: Good job, guys.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: They both look at each other. "Okay. No, of course, shift change." They both get up, give a nod, and then exit out while the two other Reiloran that have their backs against the wall, cock their heads at different times in your direction. You hear in your mind, "Exaltant. I do not recognize you."
LAURA: Don't you?
MATT: Make one more deception check for me. Are you trying to play yourself off as your mother?
LAURA: As her daughter.
MATT: Oh.
LAURA: I'm trying to play it off that they should recognize who I am.
MATT: Gotcha. Okay, then I will say make an intimidation check on this. They definitely were making a connection both through power set and visibility.
TRAVIS: As those two Vanguard left and clocking the Reilorans as we're walking in, are they wearing any necklaces, amulets, anything that we've noticed from our first time here to now that could maybe be a passport for the bridge? Just as we're looking for anything that they're using?
MATT: Make a perception check.
TRAVIS: Can I use advantage? No, it's just my vision. Okay. Natural 20.
LAURA: Yes!
TRAVIS: 21. 22.
MATT: Great. Glancing at the two of them, you get the sense from their arms that they're--
LIAM: They have arms.
MARISHA: Lackeys.
MATT: They're not high ranking members of the Vanguard. They're not grunts, thus they're not put at the front lines, but they don't seem to be wearing any signifying attire that would carry with them--
TRAVIS: No import?
MATT: Yeah, any import or special attention to be granted them in such a degree. So, you know pretty clearly that they're not the ones you'd be looking for in that case.
TRAVIS: Are there on the two Reilorans?
MATT: Oh, the Reilorans?
TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.
MATT: They are not wearing anything that you recognize at all.
TRAVIS: Yeah, it's all alien.
MATT: All of their armor looks to be made from a combination of thick hides, carved bone, and iron-like metals in this patchwork, bestial barbarian type aesthetic. The chains that wrap around them, you can see as it goes around it, they both come to an end in their mid-back where you see at the end of each chain is some sort of a foot-long blade.
SAM: Ooh.
MATT: Hooked, like Scorpion's spear from Mortal Kombat that dangles along their back--
ASHLEY: Cool!
MATT: -- like a half cloak.
TRAVIS: Is it those things you can spin and kick and they-- (flying blade)
MARISHA: Yeah.
SAM: Oh, yeah, those things are awesome.
MARISHA: Wait, what are those fucking called? They got a name. I know what you're talking about. Those are cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
TRAVIS: It was in "Kill Bill." Yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: Yeah, it's a Chinese weapon.
TRAVIS: Yep.
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: You see them both eyeing--
MARISHA: What?
TALIESIN: Yeah, carry on.
MATT: -- eyeing Imogen with direct intent. What did you roll for--
LAURA: 21.
MATT: 21.
ASHLEY: Nice.
MATT: They both give a nod. "And what do we owe the pleasure and honor?"
LAURA: That prisoner. I want him.
MATT: "Why?"
LAURA: Who are you to question me?
MATT: "Just curious, that's all. No disrespect."
LAURA: Are you aware of a phrase we say here in Exandria? Curiosity killed the cat?
MATT: "No, are you familiar with the Ruidian phrase--" (laughter)
MATT: Throwing this around back and forth. Make me fucking laugh.
ASHLEY: Well, are you familiar--
MARISHA: Ruidian phrase, "Fuck off, bitch."
MATT: Get the fuck out of here. (laughter)
MATT: Welcome back.
TALIESIN: You missed a lot, yeah.
MATT: To step where uninvited calls immediate malice.
LAURA: Yeah, I know.
MARISHA: Doesn't roll off the tongue as easily, does it?
MATT: No, not really. It's lost in translation. (laughter)
TALIESIN: It sounds way better in the original Reiloran.
ASHLEY: I though that was a little harder to learn. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Bunch of L's.
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: "No disrespect presented to you, but we were given specific orders by Otohan herself to keep watch over this. I've not been given instruction that you outrank Otohan, so I have to stick with the orders that were given."
LAURA: I'll have to talk to Otohan.
MATT: "Mm."
LAURA: I'll step out of the room for a moment.
SAM: You don't have to step to talk to us, you know?
LAURA: Yeah, I'll-- No, I know. (buzzes lips) I'm going to step out of the tunnel.
SAM: Should we attack?
TRAVIS: I'm still in here.
LAURA: I know you are.
LIAM: Yeah, Chet's in there.
TRAVIS: I'll give you instructions to eat deez nuts! (fake screams) No. (laughter)
LAURA: I'm going to step out of the tunnel, and step outside and be like: (panting) Okay.
ASHLEY: Can we talk to the prisoner?
LAURA: I mean I don't think he's going to--
ASHLEY: In his head?
SAM: We can just attack.
MARISHA: What do we do, do we just attack him?
LAURA: They look really strong. Okay. I'm going to--
MARISHA: We've just got to subdue them to get this prisoner, right?
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Should I try to come in?
LIAM: They got to go down.
LAURA: Okay maybe we step in and I'll step in with all of you.
TRAVIS: Actually just, I've kept walking towards both the Reilorans. I walk up to the one on the--
LAURA: What if we just stick them together and--
ASHLEY: Yeah.
LAURA: I got-- okay.
ASHLEY: I'm going to come in too.
TRAVIS: On the left.
MARISHA: Surprise attack?
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: I think guns blazing.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: Okay.
TRAVIS: I reach into the bag of holding and I hold out my hand to the-- From Otohan.
MATT: He just looks at you expectantly.
TRAVIS: I open my hand.
MATT: What's in your hand?
TRAVIS: A small wooden something.
SAM: Aw.
MATT: They look at each other oddly. In your mind you hear, "Curious, small old one. What offerings do you bring of this Exandrian realm?"
TRAVIS: It's a (voice deepens) boy. (transformational tearing) I'll start turning into a werewolf.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: All right, well let's roll initiative, then.
LAURA: All right, we come back in.
MARISHA: Can we run in--
LAURA: We run back in, superman punching in the doorway.
MARISHA: -- and surprise attack?
MATT: More or less. We'll see how initiative goes.
MARISHA: Surprise round?
LAURA: Can you hit Silence--
MATT: Surprised round, no.
LAURA: -- in this room so that we don't--
TRAVIS: Do I get one action?
LIAM: The old man just gave him--
MATT: You do.
LIAM: -- a toy and turned into a werewolf.
TRAVIS: I gave him a wooden ass.
LIAM: That was perfect.
MARISHA: Why?
ASHLEY: Are we initiative?
LAURA: No.
SAM: Do you have a map for this, Matt?
MATT: I do.
SAM: This combat is brought to you by WizKids Minis. Laudna, Chetney, Orym, and Imogen are ready to join you on your adventures. Bring home these cuddly companions today and complete your Bells Hells plush collecsh.
LAURA: Can we take that one--
SAM: Check out all the Bells Hells plushies at--
LAURA: Can we take that down so we can see in?
SAM: -- wizkids.io/bellshellsplush
MATT: Yeah, I'm setting the tone of this first.
TRAVIS: Nice.
SAM: Bells Hells plush.
LIAM: Did you say collecsh?
ASHLEY: Oh, that's a fun map!
SAM: It's an abbreviation of collection.
LIAM: Oh, that's what it means.
SAM: Collecsh.
MATT: So, opening this up a little bit--
ASHLEY: Sweet collecsh?
MATT: -- so you have an actual view of this now that you have the setting for it situated. Pull these off to the side.
LAURA: I love it!
ASHLEY: I got to go perch. I got to perch.
SAM: (laughs) I got to go take a perch. (laughter)
ASHLEY: I do. I have to go pee so bad.
LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
TALIESIN: Let's get initiative and we'll--
TRAVIS: Dang, they look fucking--
TALIESIN: Initiatives.
ASHLEY: What a cute little area.
MARISHA: So I want this--
LAURA: Where the prisoner?
MARISHA: Matt, is this the switchback
LAURA: He's in there--
MARISHA: -- out here that we're going to?
MATT: You guys are heading down this way.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: So this is technically sloped.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: In fact, if we want to keep it a little more accurate--
SAM: Oh cool.
MATT: -- I can do this.
LAURA: Sick!
ASHLEY: Awesome.
LIAM: They look like Reiloran ninja.
LAURA: They do.
SAM: Oh, it's a raked stage.
MATT: Look at that.
TRAVIS: The prisoner is?
LAURA: Is lying down behind.
MATT: Right there.
TRAVIS: Oh, he's in the back?
MARISHA: Matt, can I fix it?
TRAVIS: ♪ Prisoner ♪
MATT: Hmm?
MARISHA: It's balancing on one--
LAURA: ♪ Let's get ♪
MATT: Got you. Yeah, if you don't mind. Thank you.
TRAVIS: Stalactites, stalagmite.
MATT: Here.
TRAVIS: Dynamite.
MARISHA: That would be there.
SAM: Oh, yeah.
MATT: There we go.
SAM: Almost better, yeah.
MATT: All right, so for that degree, because you had just stepped out. We'll put you at there. The rest of you were probably waiting off to the side.
LIAM: Because we have to let those two guards go.
MATT: Right, go by, jumping into the alcoves here to hide.
LIAM: Oh jeez.
MATT: We'll say you're probably hiding near this rock element.
SAM: Yeah, that's the new one I just got.
MARISHA: (gasps) Is that from our friends?
TRAVIS: Stay focused. Oh.
MARISHA: That is lie? Is that true?
SAM: That's a lie. It's a lie.
MARISHA: (laughs) You bitch. (laughs)
SAM: Sorry.
LIAM: That one's just for you guys, I think.
LAURA: Yeah. (laughter)
MATT: All righty, so--
TALIESIN: Yep.
MATT: All right, initiatives 25 to 20.
TRAVIS: 20.
LIAM: 23.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: 23? All righty.
LAURA: Oh, wait, wait.
TRAVIS: Orym, Chet.
SAM: Chet.
LAURA: Okay.
TALIESIN: Thank you.
MARISHA: For like two seconds, though--
SAM: I know, I had you.
MARISHA: You had me for two seconds.
SAM: Six!
LAURA: Wait, wait.
MATT: Hold on. (laughter)
SAM: Well nobody's saying anything.
TALIESIN: He hasn't said--
TRAVIS: Calm down!
MATT: 20 to 15.
TRAVIS: Jesus, Sam!
ASHLEY: 16.
SAM: Keep it together!
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Sorry, whose number was that?
ASHLEY: I'm 16.
MARISHA: Fearne.
MATT: 15 to 10?
LAURA: 14.
MATT: 14. Okay. 10 to five?
SAM: Six!
MARISHA: Seven.
TALIESIN: Nine.
MATT: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Ashton, Laudna--
MARISHA: Ash, Laudna.
MATT: Okay, so--
MARISHA: Oh! Here comes another one.
MATT: Because you did get the transformation rush, I'll let you get one action in, and then we're going to start with Orym.
TRAVIS: I would like to grapple him.
MATT: Grapple?
TRAVIS: Grapple him and slide-- Yeah, the guy on the left, and slide around to his left. So I put him between me and the other Reiloran. I'm going to try and bind him with my arms.
MATT: Got you. Okay, yeah, make an athletics check with advantage.
MARISHA: Ooh!
TRAVIS: Hell yes. 22.
MATT: 22?
TRAVIS: Athletics check, I'm sorry, 26.
MATT: Oh he is very, very much grappled. Very much grappled.
TRAVIS: Very much, very much grappled.
MATT: Extremely grappled. The grappling is extreme. There it is, very grappled.
LAURA: Do you need another dice? Or are you doing okay? Do you want a different dice?
MARISHA: I keep switching them out.
MATT: Shifting--
MARISHA: They're all failing me.
TRAVIS: Perfection.
MATT: -- over there.
LAURA: Do you need to switch your hands?
MARISHA: Oh, yeah, maybe. (laughs) I just use Sam's.
LAURA: (laughs)
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: Yeah, try it next time.
MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter)
MATT: Okay. As you succeed and twist around and shove him in between the two of you.
MARISHA: Yeah, I rolled a five for initiative.
MATT: He's currently held, grappled by you there in between the two of them.
TRAVIS: (growls)
MATT: Now we're at the top of the round. Orym, you're up first.
MARISHA: It's fine.
LIAM: Oh, man. I'm not going to do much here because I don't know where this is going so I'm going to run into the mouth of the cave here. Five, 10, 15, 20, 25. I'm going to stop right-- No, I'll go to there.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: I'm going to throw a dagger into the head of the Reiloran that Chet is holding.
MATT: Okay, go ahead and roll.
LIAM: That is a 24 to hit.
MATT: 24 hits.
LIAM: Okay. That is just 10, no, six points of damage.
MATT: Six points of damage.
LIAM: That is not much. But I don't know what we're doing yet.
TRAVIS: ♪ I don't know much ♪
LIAM: I'm going to stay here to block the cave entrance and try to intercept if they make a run for it.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: That's it. I'm done.
MATT: The dagger actually strikes its head crest, but you can see that spiked armor that it has built onto the front of its head, it gets wedged in there and it knocks it off. It damages it, but it didn't do as much as--
LIAM: Understood.
MATT: You know, it wasn't a direct hit between its eyes.
TRAVIS: Now that we're so close, can we see what the materials are made of on this headdress? Is it like bones or some kind of polymer?
MATT: Now that you're this close, the mandibles that you see are not actually its mandibles. They were taken from another creature or crafted like mandibles that are part of this metallic head harness that acts as plates of spiked armor that hit on the front of its head, and then elements that come out the back. To give a nice solid glance at what you're seeing up front.
SAM: Cool.
TRAVIS: Oh jesus! That is wicked looking.
LAURA: Pass it around! Pass it around!
MARISHA: Yeah, can we?
MATT: Sure, yeah. Pass it around.
LIAM: I also know one is waiting at the bottom.
MARISHA: Ah!
TRAVIS: So grabbing him also probably hurts a little bit.
TALIESIN: We've got to a nice private place, so let's get--
MATT: While you're grappling him? Not yet.
TRAVIS: Okay.
SAM: Like walrus tusks.
MARISHA: Matt, is the toppled over guy the prisoner?
ASHLEY: Oh, that's funny.
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: Man, there's all sorts of these guys.
ASHLEY: Look at his arm flare.
TRAVIS: That's awesome.
LAURA: That's awesome. Ooh, look at his mouth in here. He's going--
MATT: All right. So Orym, that finishes your turn?
LIAM: Yeah, the last thing is, in everyone's heads, you hear him say: Pace yourselves.
LIAM: There he is. That's cool.
ASHLEY: Yes. Good call.
MARISHA: Yes.
MATT: Are you ready?
TALIESIN: Thank you.
MATT: Well, now it's their turn.
LAURA: Oh, already?
MATT: Yeah, they have--
LIAM: Look at them.
MATT: -- pretty high on their dexterity.
LIAM: Look at how fast they look.
MATT: So, it is the Reiloran Shrike's turn.
LIAM: Shrike!
MARISHA: You haven't gone yet, right?
TRAVIS: No.
MARISHA: So you're after them?
TRAVIS: Yeah, they were above a 20.
MATT: The one that wasn't grappled by you, as soon as you grapple it and slam it to the side, it-- (angry exhale) It's going to go ahead and-- You know what? Hmm. Yeah, it's going to shift over this way. Leap to this table. You watch as it has both its claws out of the side, glancing over at you, and at you who had entered and left. It's looking at you as you've turned around and prepared yourself. Kind of like (intimidating hiss). You watch as the chains unravel on their own--
LAURA: Ew.
LIAM: Cool.
MATT: -- and the one spike at the end (whirling) curls like a scorpion's tail.
TRAVIS: Oh shit, cool.
MATT: Then telekinetically throws it in your direction.
LIAM: The chain? It's on a chain and it goes that long?
MATT: It goes for 30 feet.
LIAM: Damn!
LAURA: 30 feet?!
TRAVIS: Whoa.
LIAM: That's cool.
LAURA: 30-foot chain!
MATT: That's going to be a 16 hit.
LIAM: That's cool.
LAURA: My AC's 15!
MATT: So it hits you.
TRAVIS: Shield!
LAURA: I'm going to die. It's going to kill me.
MATT: You take--
MARISHA: Look, they hit with their grappling gun.
MATT: Seven points of piercing damage.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: I need you to make a strength saving throw.
TALIESIN: Oh, cool. Get over here.
LAURA: It is a get over here, 14.
MATT: 14. (whooshes)
LAURA: Oh wait, wait, wait. We have advantage on all saving throws.
MATT: All saving throws from?
LAURA: From our Heroes' Feast!
MATT: That's a wisdom saving throw.
SAM: Wisdom saving throw.
LIAM: Wisdoms only.
LAURA: Fuck!
MATT: So as it arcs out, it slams into the side of your shoulder. You're like (groans). It feels like it has hooks in it, and (groans) pulls you forward back towards it. As you can yanked through the air, it has the blades out at the ready and it puts them both up from underneath towards you for two strikes.
LIAM: Oh!
MATT: That's going to be a 17 hit. Better that the last. And a 25 to hit.
SAM: Oof.
LAURA: You know it hits! (laughter)
MARISHA: Matt? Aren't shrikes the murder birds?
MATT: Yes, they are.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: They put heads of dead animals on spikes?
TALIESIN: Yep.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah, they're cool.
MARISHA: Have you seen this? They're cool.
LIAM: Shrikes are cool.
MATT: They're terrifying.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: You take 11 points of piercing damage. Oh, sorry, slashing damage from the one blade.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: And 10 points of slashing damage.
LIAM: Shite.
TALIESIN: All right, let's get in there and fix this shit.
MATT: As the blade dislodges. You can watch as now you fall to the ground and catch yourself. The blades out at the ready. Its mandibles there. It's staring at you with its eyes and the chains floats around it, like it doesn't even have gravity. The other one that's grappled by you--
TRAVIS: Yep.
MATT: -- is going to watch this happen, grin, and try and pull the blades out to arc you from the inside. It's going to take three strikes with you.
TRAVIS: Does it have to break the grapple first?
MATT: Grapple just reduces its speed to zero.
TRAVIS: Got it.
MATT: But what it's going to do, actually--
TRAVIS: Not restrained.
MATT: First--
LAURA: Yeah, restrained.
MARISHA: Murder birds.
MATT: Actually, it's going to take one of its attacks and it's going to try and shove you.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: I need you to make an athletics or acrobatics check.
TRAVIS: I will do an athletics check.
SAM: Where's he shoving him?
MATT: Actually--
ASHLEY: It's their turn now?
MATT: No, sorry, sorry. This is Telekinetic Shove. I need you to make a strength saving throw.
TRAVIS: Strength saving throw?
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: That's not at advantage. Nat-- dirty 18, 25.
MATT: 25. It tries to telekinetically push you out of the way, but you manage to hold onto it and (groans) resist its impact. Frustrated, it's going to go ahead--
TRAVIS: I do have advantage on it.
MATT: Yeah, it's going to use one of attacks now to try and shove you in this direction.
TRAVIS: Telepathically?
MATT: No, it tried doing telepathically. That didn't work out as its bonus action. So now instead it's going to try and physically shove you over to the side from where you are.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: So now you get to roll an athletics check.
TRAVIS: Okay.
SAM: Why is he trying to move Chetney?
TRAVIS: It says 17 plus eight. 25?
MATT: 25? Fuck! 24. (laughter)
TRAVIS: The other one was a three.
MATT: All right. Realizing that it can't even move you at this point, it's going to lunge at you twice.
TRAVIS: (growls)
MATT: That's going to be a--
TRAVIS: Might have to snap it back.
MATT: Yep, 23 to hit.
TRAVIS: It does hit.
MATT: That's going to be a 20 to hit.
TRAVIS: They both hit.
MATT: All righty, with that, you take seven points of slashing damage.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: Reduced to three. Eight points slashing damage reduced to four.
TRAVIS: Got it.
MATT: That's going to finish its turn. Okay. Now, we're going to bring us to Chetney, with Fearne on deck.
TRAVIS: Boy, I thought Blood Curse of Binding would help, except they got these 30-foot chain dicks. So.
TALIESIN: (laughs)
TRAVIS: I'll take three swipes. Actually, with my bonus action, I'll rake my claws against my thighs like a cowboy drawing down, and take three swipes at him.
MATT: Okay. Are you breaking your grapple?
TRAVIS: Yeah. Yeah.
MATT: Up to you. Up to you. You don't have to.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I think so.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: He can't move him for a round.
TRAVIS: He's got a 30-foot tentacle wang.
MATT: Sure enough.
TRAVIS: Terrible. That is a 20 to hit?
MATT: That hits.
TRAVIS: Okay. It's cocked. That's only 17 to hit?
MATT: 17 misses.
TRAVIS: 17 misses. Third one. 20 to hit.
MATT: Okay, so two hits.
TRAVIS: Oh, I didn't roll a divine curse. That's three points for me. It goes down.
MATT: And Fearne, you're up next.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TRAVIS: Four, six, that's 10 on the first one with three points of fire damage. So 13 total.
MATT: Got it.
TRAVIS: The third one that hit, ooh, 12 plus six. So 18, 19, 20, 21.
MATT: 21.
TRAVIS: On the third one that hit.
MATT: Great.
TRAVIS: The second one missed.
MATT: Okay. So after you arc up and hack twice, the third one, it actually manages to parry with one of its blades to the side, but you do get two heavy strikes on it. It's like (grunts). You hear in your head, "Oh, a tasty little wolf."
SAM: Oh boy.
TRAVIS: (inquisitive whimpers) (laughter)
MATT: All right. Fearne, you're up, with Imogen on deck.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: All right, all right. So I'm going to walk in. I have 35 feet, so I'm going to get in there.
MATT: 35 gets you back there.
ASHLEY: I'm going to try something. Am I within 30 feet of them? With the two of them?
MATT: You think you are. You're pretty close.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: The first one, anyway.
ASHLEY: All right.
LAURA: Think you are.
ASHLEY: So I'm going to--
TRAVIS: Okay.
MARISHA: I'm going to--
ASHLEY: This might change things a little bit, but I'm going to try to Charm Person on both of them at 2nd-level.
MATT: Charm Person on both of them, okay.
ASHLEY: I don't know if it's going to work.
TRAVIS: Are they people?
MATT: 2nd-level.
SAM: They're humanoids?
ASHLEY: A humanoid?
LAURA and TALIESIN: Humanoids.
LIAM: We got to hide.
LAURA: They're not monsters. Yeah, they're humanoids.
TALIESIN: The brain stuff may fuck it up, but let's find out.
MATT: Correct. Now because you were fighting them, they have disadvantage, or sorry they have advantage against it, but we'll go ahead--
ASHLEY: It's dumb. Should I do something else?
SAM: No, no.
TALIESIN: No, we're here.
SAM: It's nice and low-level.
MATT: So the one that's--
SAM: Not wasting too many.
MATT: The one that's currently just finished slashing into Imogen as Imogen's preparing her own retort, that's going to be a 17.
ASHLEY: Doesn't work.
MATT: Okay, so the one that--
ASHLEY: 18 is the--
MATT: 18 is your DC?
ASHLEY: 18 is the DC.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Oh wow.
MATT: So that one--
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: -- is considered charmed by you.
LIAM: Okay, okay, nobody hit that one.
MATT: The other one is going to be a 16.
SAM: Oh!
TALIESIN: Oh, well--
TRAVIS: They both work.
MARISHA: (laughs)
SAM: Fight's over.
TRAVIS: Yo!
LAURA: Wow, okay.
TALIESIN: Fight's down.
SAM: Wait--
ASHLEY: Oh, wait. Do we want it to be?
SAM: -- so Charm Person just means they're nice to you.
MATT: It regards you as a friendly acquaintance.
LAURA: It works for an hour.
SAM: They're nice to you.
TRAVIS: Yeah, to you only.
MATT: Yeah, they're not controlled by you.
ASHLEY: No.
MATT: They just see you as a friend.
LAURA: So are they--
MATT: Doesn't change how they see everybody else.
SAM: Yes, but that's good, though.
LAURA: They're still going to attack us.
ASHLEY: Shit.
SAM: No, that's still good. That's great.
ASHLEY: All right.
MATT: So as you walk in brusquely, you release your incantation and you feel it grasp both of their minds. For the time being, they both glance at you and you hear in your head, "Come, help."
ASHLEY: Wait. Why are we attacking these people?
MATT: "They attacked us!"
ASHLEY: Because you probably attacked first. This is the Vanguard. Calm down.
LAURA: Vanguard!
MATT: That finishes your turn?
LAURA: Oh god. But they're going to attack us again on the next turn.
TRAVIS: You guys always do this.
SAM: It's okay.
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: Well, no, it's okay, except I'm up next. Do I attack them or do I just--
ASHLEY: Stop attacking.
SAM: Yeah, they still hate you.
LAURA: They're still going to--
ASHLEY: Stop attacking them.
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: We're done.
MATT: Make a persuasion check of an extremely high DC.
TRAVIS: Come on, come on.
MARISHA: That just might-- come on.
MATT: It's not impossible.
LAURA: Yeah, nat 20.
MATT: It's not impossible.
MARISHA: Come on, come on, come on.
TRAVIS: Come on, no time like the present.
LAURA: You're so persuasive.
LIAM: Yeah, let's go.
MARISHA: You got this.
LIAM: Play those slots.
ASHLEY: 17.
MATT: 17?
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: You get the sense that probably a little more interested in killing the people that attacked them.
ASHLEY: (groans)
LAURA: Oh shit.
MATT: But they regard you as a friend for the time being.
SAM: Like you could go get the prisoner out of there.
TRAVIS: Right, yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
LIAM: You're not out of attack mode.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's a good idea, actually.
MATT: All right, Imogen, you're up, with Ashton on deck.
LAURA: Okay.
TALIESIN: Do have any sweets left?
LAURA: Telekinesis is still up because it's only been three minutes. So I'm going to grab the guy in front of me with Telekinesis.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: What I want to do-- How high are the ceilings in here?
MATT: It's probably about 20 or so feet. Not terribly high.
LAURA: Great. I want to slam him up into the ceiling above his friend and then slam him back down into his friend.
TRAVIS: Whoa.
MATT: Okay. (laughs)
ASHLEY: Oh nice.
TRAVIS: Yes, oh my gosh.
MARISHA: Hell yes.
MATT: All right, so this is your spellcasting ability roll versus its strength check.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: So roll a d20 and add your charisma modifier.
LIAM: Great. Doesn't mean it's strong.
LAURA: That would be a 21.
MATT: Nine. So the one in front of you, as it's like (snarls), you concentrate and as you look towards it, all of the veins on your body, the weird shifting bits of lightning that curl up across your throat glow. On the inside of the hood that you wear, it's like the hood itself is lit from the inside. You watch the Reiloran and its eyes go wide, and tries to dart backward and then gets grabbed and slammed up into the ceiling. That's going to be-- Roll 2d6 for slamming it into the roof.
LIAM: Rag doll physics.
LAURA: That's nine points.
MATT: Nine points of damage to it. Then you slam it back down into the 20 feet. Two more d6s.
ASHLEY: Nice!
LAURA: Only five on the second one.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: But do I roll for bludgeon on the other guy, too?
MATT: He gets a dexterity saving throw to see if he can avoid it.
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: Jerry!
MATT: Natural 20 on his point.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: He actually darts. No, you drop grapple. So, yeah, so he does dart out of the way as he gets slammed into the ground right there and barely catches himself. However, he is considered restrained while held by you. Correct?
LAURA: Yes.
TALIESIN: Is he also prone after that or no? Oh, there's reading going on.
MATT: So he is restrained.
LAURA: Okay. I'm going to Quicken a spell and I'm going to step over to where I'm directly in front of him.
MATT: Over here?
LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to Lightning Bolt through both of them.
SAM: Nice.
MATT: You can definitely do that.
TRAVIS: Wow.
LAURA: Awesome.
LIAM: Set 'em up, knock 'em down.
TALIESIN: Nice.
MATT: All righty, so--
MARISHA: Are they holding their chains to get any additional bonus?
MATT: (laughs) Narratively, maybe.
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: All right, so as restrained.
TALIESIN: No, no, no. Go fishing.
MATT: Disadvantage on dexterity saving throws. So the one that you have currently holding can barely dodge out of the way.
MARISHA: Oh yes.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: Disadvantage on that.
MARISHA: I was looking at my spells and thinking.
MATT: Okay, that's going to be a 14 with disadvantage--
LAURA: It fails.
MATT: -- on the one behind it that you had just released, Chetney, and just finished slashing up with your claws. Natural two.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: They both fail. Roll full damage on each.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: Yes!
LAURA: Oh wait, that's only 6d6. I need 9d6. Hold on.
ASHLEY: Dang.
TALIESIN: I'm the only person here who'll never say "Do you need an extra die?"
MARISHA: A casual little 9d6?
LAURA: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Damn.
MARISHA: Fuck this whole thing.
LAURA: Okay. 11, 20, 24, 28, 30 points of lightning damage.
SAM: Damn.
MATT: 30 points of lightning damage on each.
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: That's cool.
MATT: Woo, all righty. So as it darts out, both the one that you're holding takes the brunt of it and it strikes through, carries into the next. You watch as the energy hits the metallic armor, the parts of the armor, and seems to arc back and forth between them, the chains carrying the bolt like a Tesla coil, (crackles) all throughout its torso. The one that you don't have held has to put its claws up onto the back to catch the edge of the stone before it falls to its knees, but keeps standing. The one that is by Chetney looks very hurt. The one that you struck immediately, the one that originally came for you, looks like it's starting to look a little rough.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: They're both caught off guard and both their attention seems to be directed on you.
LAURA: One is restrained?
MATT: Correct. The one that you're holding. Does that finish your turn?
LAURA: Yes.
MATT: Ashton, you're up. Laudna on deck.
TALIESIN: I assume I haven't seen anybody come in this way or any interesting shit happening down this--
MATT: Make a perception check.
TALIESIN: Okay, I would've been doing this beforehand, man, but okay.
MATT: I'm sure.
TALIESIN: Is this part of my action or not?
MATT: No, I'll give this to you as part of why you were out there keeping an eye.
TALIESIN: Thank you. Hey, that's 14.
MATT: 14. You do see about 80 or 90 feet down that way, just starting to jog up to follow some of the other soldiers you saw go by. Two more Vanguard figures.
SAM: Uh-oh.
MARISHA: What? Where? What?
SAM: Coming down from the hallway.
MATT: Coming up this way from the base. They're just now catching up on the--
TALIESIN: They can't--
MATT: -- starting to go up the ramp.
TALIESIN: They can't see us yet, though.
MATT: They don't seem to be rushing. They're just jogging.
LIAM: Sand-storming out there.
MATT: Yeah, there's plenty of wind and noise and there's a massive battle happening out on the other side of this excavation site.
TALIESIN: Telekinetically: Let's finish this up quick, people. I'm going to hop down and make my way in.
TRAVIS and MARISHA: ♪ Make your way in ♪
MARISHA and LAURA: (laugh)
TALIESIN: Oh, actually, I should rage before I do anything because maybe that'll help. All right, I'm going to fucking ♪ rage ♪.
TRAVIS: ♪ Rage ♪
TALIESIN: Ooh, okay.
SAM: ♪ Sam Rage ♪
MARISHA and LAURA: (laugh)
TRAVIS: Sam Rage.
TALIESIN: Welcome to space.
MATT: All righty.
TALIESIN: I get a little translucent. Let's see what we--
LAURA: We are all Sam Rage.
MATT: 20, 25, 30, 35, 40. Your speed is 50?
TALIESIN: 40.
TRAVIS: Sam Rage.
MATT: 40. It gets you right in front of Fearne right there.
TALIESIN: Okay, hold on. Let's see. What do I do if I get a chaos burst here? Okay, let's see. Okay, is one of them-- Which one's looking real rough?
MATT: That would be this one back here.
TALIESIN: Okay, I didn't even run in here. 30 speed.
MATT: By the way--
TALIESIN: 30 feet is my walking speed.
MATT: He's no longer charmed.
TALIESIN: Is he no longer charmed?
MATT: He is.
TALIESIN: Oh, good. That's one we fucked up.
MATT: The other one because they both got damaged since.
TRAVIS: Yeah, they both did.
MATT: Yeah, they both are--
TRAVIS: No.
MATT: No, this one is still charmed. The one that she's currently--
TRAVIS: (growls)
LAURA: He's on the ground.
MATT: He's like (grunts). No, sorry, he's the one that breaks the charm. I pulled off the wrong one. The one that's super hurt is still charmed.
LAURA: Oh. Oh, right. (laughs)
MATT: Even after the Lightning Bolt by you.
TRAVIS: (as Laura) Oh, right.
TALIESIN: I'm going to just walk. I'm not even going to run. I'm going to take my 40 feet of nice, quiet jogging, take a look inside, take my hammer and underhand throw into a portal and hit the one--
TRAVIS and MATT: (laugh)
TALIESIN: -- hit the one that's fucked up.
MATT: Softball pitch it?
TRAVIS: Hit it out of here.
TALIESIN: So it comes back at me, comes back through, and then catches right back.
TRAVIS: Underarm passing.
MATT: That's cool.
LAURA: That's sick!
TALIESIN: Yeah, let's do this as a--
MATT: Go ahead and make the attack roll.
TALIESIN: Yeah, and I'll take the advantage for the--
MATT: Okay, so you're doing reckless?
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to reckless for these.
MATT: Go for it.
TALIESIN: It's a shitty toss. Yeah, 17, 20. Yeah, that's 27, that hits.
MATT: That hits. Go ahead and roll damage.
TALIESIN: Should have pulled my damage dice. Okay. Ah, that's okay. 18 points of damage.
MATT: 18 points of damage. As you release it, you watch as a little center space opens up and swallows the hammer as you chuck it into nothing. At the same time, the rock behind the one that you're currently engaged with is looking about a bit frantic. Wham, gets hit from the back of the head and there's a spray of dark blood as it falls to the ground in front of you and is no longer moving.
TALIESIN: Is it no longer moving?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Yes.
TALIESIN: Then I'm going to grab the hammer as it flies back at me, fly back into a portal as it happens, and hop out right behind that motherfucker there.
LAURA: Cool.
LIAM: (laughs)
LAURA: How do you have so many portals?
TALIESIN: Fucker.
MATT: All righty. You have a second attack, if you want.
TALIESIN: Oh, I do have a second attack.
TRAVIS: Do I smell anything interesting about this blood?
MATT: It is a unique blood smell.
TRAVIS: Cool.
MATT: You've not--
TRAVIS: Just new.
MATT: Yeah.
SAM: Nougat. (laughter)
MATT: It doesn't smell terribly dissimilar from other humanoid blood. It has a unique tinge to it.
TRAVIS: Has those iron notes to it?
MATT: It's still iron.
TRAVIS: A hint of Freon.
MATT: Yeah. (laughs)
TALIESIN: I've got the hammer up. I'm going to drop it down.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Straight down.
TRAVIS: Good vintage.
TALIESIN: That's 26 to hit.
MATT: That hits.
MARISHA: Freon.
MATT: (laughs)
TALIESIN: 19 points of damage.
MATT: All righty. So the one that's being held, dropping the hammer on it, it takes the hit, but its body doesn't shift. It's like you're hitting a slightly fleshy wall because it's currently being held aloft by Imogen mentally through a telekinetic hold.
TALIESIN: Cool.
LAURA: Don't destroy him, if we need him for deception.
TALIESIN: Cool.
MATT: All right, that finishes your turn?
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
MATT: Laudna, you're up, with FCG on deck.
MARISHA: How far away are the duders coming up?
MATT: They're about 80 or so feet from the edge of this.
LAURA: He's dead.
MATT: So they're about 120 feet from you.
MARISHA: Okay, okay.
ASHLEY: Is one of them still--
LAURA: Yeah, he's dead-dead, right? The one that he hit?
MATT: Oh yeah.
LAURA: Or is he alive? Yeah, he's dead.
TALIESIN: So this one is dead.
LAURA: If there's people coming up, I want to be able to hold him up and make it look like he's still standing there as a--
LIAM: (grunting)
LAURA: Yeah. (laughs) "Weekend at Bernie's" the Reiloran.
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: This is fucked up.
MARISHA: This little offshoot that FCG and I are in isn't a path? It's a little--
LIAM: Hidey-hole?
MATT: A little hidey-hole?
MATT: Yeah. This is a cliff edge that goes down about 35, 40 feet into the very base of the area. The Malleus Key is that direction.
LIAM: The duders are coming up this one?
MATT: They're coming up this path.
TRAVIS: Duders.
LIAM: So you guys are hidden.
MARISHA: Okay, cool. I'm going to peek my head around, then, in this little crack and sniper-shot him with some--
LAURA: The guys? The guys coming up?
MARISHA: Not the guy coming up. The Reiloran.
LAURA: No, they're dead. The Reilorans are dead.
SAM: I thought one is dead.
MATT: One of them is dead. The one that you're holding is still alive.
LAURA: Oh, I thought you were saying he was dead, and he was still holding up.
TALIESIN: No, we're just trying to knock him out now.
MATT: Meaning he hit it, but it didn't give.
LAURA: Oh, gross.
MATT: Because you're holding it in place. So it was like (groans).
LAURA: Got it.
MARISHA: Okay. Three shots at this guy. You said he's looking rough?
SAM: ♪ Shot, shots, shots ♪
MATT: This guy?
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: Come on.
MATT: You have advantage on these, by the way.
MARISHA: I have advantage?
MATT: He's restrained.
MARISHA: Well, I rolled two 19s and a 13.
MATT: Okay, so roll one more dice.
MARISHA: So that's--
MATT: The first one hits.
MARISHA: Well, I rolled all three at once.
TALIESIN: Yeah, but it's--
MARISHA: Here I'm going to keep those three and roll another three.
SAM: Yeah.
MARISHA: Because those are good.
MATT: Yeah, go for it. So it's 19, 19? First one hits. 13 on this next one.
MARISHA: So 30, 30, 24. No, that's not right.
LIAM: You're just fishing for 20s.
MARISHA: Now I'm just fishing for 20s and all the other ones were dog shit, so I'll take the first roll. So 30, 30, and 24 to hit.
MATT: Okay, so when you rolled the last three, I was thinking the first attack was the first two that you rolled, the second one was the second two. You're not picking your best three out of six whole rolls.
TRAVIS: So 30, 30, 24.
MATT: It's two, two, then two.
MARISHA: Okay, so 30.
MATT: So 30 for the first hit. Then 13 plus whatever.
SAM: 11. So 24 for the second.
MATT: The last one was what were your last rolls?
MARISHA: It was, shit, I don't know. 14, one was a 14, and then the other was something less. So--
SAM: Just roll two more.
MARISHA: I'll roll two more.
MATT: Go for it.
MARISHA: I really wanted to keep those. Natural 19 again.
MATT: Okay, yeah, so all three hits.
MARISHA: So all three hits. I didn't realize I had advantage, I'm sorry. Okay, 1d10.
SAM: Come on! Make it spooky!
MARISHA: Plus 15, so I'm going to roll all of them all at once.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: For damage. Yeah, that is 15, 20, no wait, 15 plus--
SAM: Oh boy.
MARISHA: Shit. 15 for the first one. Shut up. 13 for the second one, seven for the last one.
MATT: Okay. How do you want to do this? (cheering)
MARISHA: Jeez Louise.
LAURA: Don't destroy him!
MARISHA: I'm not going to destroy him.
LIAM: I destroy him.
MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)
MARISHA: I blow his head off!
LAURA: He's obliterated.
MARISHA: Jeez, goodness gracious. I want to try and hit the same-- It's target practice. I want to try and hit the same spot and bore a hole through him like "Death Becomes Her."
ASHLEY: Nice.
MATT: And not kill him.
MARISHA: No, no, I kill him.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: She doesn't want to destroy his body.
MARISHA: I just don't want--
LAURA: She doesn't want him to look dead.
MATT: I see, I misunderstood.
TRAVIS: "Death Becomes Her."
MATT: I see.
LIAM: It's a scarecrow. We want a scarecrow.
MATT: (impacts)
MARISHA: (laughs)
MARISHA: "Death Becomes Her," she's still alive.
MATT and LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: That's true.
SAM: I haven't seen it.
MATT: Reiloran, not so much.
MARISHA: You've never--
SAM: I saw it years ago.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: Yeah, you full on repeatedly blast through the middle of its abdomen and scatter out across the back of its abdomen.
LAURA: Oh, right onto Ashton? (laughs)
MATT: Right onto Ashton, yeah. Ashton, you get a bit of a Reiloran spray.
TALIESIN: Cool.
MATT: It's a dark purple color.
MARISHA: Then I want to go back to FCG and hide from these guys that are coming.
MATT: You have enough movement to move there.
MARISHA: I didn't want to pop out that far earlier, because I have Spell Sniper.
LIAM: Same jokes for seven years.
MATT: Five, 10. You can do that, yeah. So I'll say it allows you to go back there.
MARISHA: Thank you.
MATT: Okay, that's your turn.
LIAM: Say "making my way" one more time!
MATT: So, he is done.
MARISHA: Okay.
TALIESIN: If we have a second more before they show up, I'd be more than happy to throw out the hole and toss the bodies in real quick, unless you want to keep, except for the one you're holding.
LAURA: Yeah, I want it to look like he's still standing guard.
TALIESIN: Okay, so I'll really quick open up and shove the one that shouldn't be there into the hole.
MARISHA: Hide, hide.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Well, I'm sure--
TALIESIN: We could all hide in the hole.
LIAM: They might just walk right past.
LAURA: Yeah, just silence and make it look like there's guards here and there's a couple Reilorans.
TALIESIN: Sitting down.
MATT: Well, all right, so if you're trying to unroll rapidly this 10 foot carpet--
TALIESIN: Oh. Well... it's If it's--
MATT: Then move bodies into it--
TALIESIN: Yeah, there's nowhere.
TRAVIS: No, no, no.
LAURA: No, no, no, no.
TALIESIN: No.
LAURA: I'm going to take it and shove everything against the wall, all the dead stuff. Yeah.
LIAM: We'll drag the spare body over here, over into this corner real quick.
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: I'm going to go to the prisoner.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: The two of us can sit and be guards.
LAURA: Be guards. Be a guard.
ASHLEY: Be a guard? Okay, I'm on guard.
LAURA: Look like you're on guard.
MATT: You stay in your wolf form?
SAM: Oh god.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm going to tiptoe over to the corner, too.
LAURA: Hiding?
TRAVIS: Yeah, behind the gems.
LAURA: We should hide. There should be two guards in here--
LIAM: And a Reiloran.
LAURA: -- and a Reiloran.
SAM: We're outside the room.
LAURA: So you're hiding. Fearne, you need to hide, not stand next to the body. Go stand against the wall.
ASHLEY: All right. (laughter)
MATT: Fearne's going to try and hide over there.
SAM: Go stand against the wall and think about what you did.
ASHLEY: (laughs)
LAURA: Then me and you, Ashton, over against this wall where the other guards had been.
TALIESIN: I'm covered in blood.
LAURA: Well then, go hide.
TALIESIN: I am hiding.
LAURA: With Chet, and then Fearne, come stand next to me.
TALIESIN: You're a guard now.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay.
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: Two guards, and then the Reiloran, I'm going to make him look like he's standing up in front of the cage.
MATT: Orym, what are you doing?
LIAM: I'm under a table.
MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)
MATT: Okay, I'd like whoever is hiding--
SAM: We're going to attach strings to their wrists so it looks like we're having a dinner party. (laughter)
MATT: Everybody but Ashton-- Sorry, everybody but Imogen and Fearne, roll stealth checks.
LIAM: We had Pass Without a Trace before this less than 60-second fight.
ASHLEY: We have it for an hour.
MARISHA: We still have it, right?
MATT: Those who are within 30 feet of you, yes.
LIAM: So I got it.
MATT: Of which Laudna does not and FCG does not.
MARISHA: No, it's a good one.
TRAVIS: Finally, finally.
MARISHA: This dice is lucky.
SAM: Stealth? Ooh.
TALIESIN: Oof, oh no.
LAURA: We're not stealthing, no.
MATT: Okay, so, Ashton?
LAURA: Because we're guards.
TALIESIN: Natural one for a 19?
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: 24.
MATT: 24. FCG?
TRAVIS: We do have plus 10 still?
SAM: 13.
MATT: 13, okay.
TALIESIN: Oh, yeah.
LAURA: Natural 20 for 36.
LAURA: Okay, okay. That counters Ashton.
TRAVIS: 29.
MATT: 29, okay. So as you all stand there, keeping place, (dashing footsteps) they just run past. (cheering)
ASHLEY: Yes!
MATT: Not even taking notice.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
TALIESIN: Get the big fucker out of the cage.
TRAVIS: Can I start searching the cavern walls for any hidden doors or latches or anything illusory? Just go around the room--
MATT: Yeah, make an investigation check.
SAM: Going to pop out and look back and forth for other folks coming.
LAURA: I'm going to search pockets for keys and look for the key for that. Is there a guard, and is there bars in front of the prisoner or is he just laying there?
MATT: No, he's just chained, and his chain is affixed to one of the nearby pieces of rock like someone had hammered this heavy bolt into it.
LIAM: I roll him over. Does he look dead, injured? What's his status?
MATT: Very injured and unconscious.
TALIESIN: Let's wake him up.
LAURA: FCG. You hear in your head, FCG.
LIAM: Letters!
SAM: What?
TRAVIS: 24 investigation--
LIAM: Need you back here.
SAM: Oh! Okay, coming.
TRAVIS: -- on the walls.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: What do you need? I'm here.
ASHLEY: This guy.
LIAM: Got a patient.
ASHLEY: Can you pump him up a little bit?
SAM: Oh, he's hurt! This is what I do.
TALIESIN: While you do that, I'm going to get him out of those manacles. Well--
SAM: First, Spare the Dying.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: In case he's at death's door.
TALIESIN: Yeah, good call.
SAM: I'm going to do an exam. How bad is he, or they, or she? What is-- he?
MATT: He looks like he's been stabilized, but is definitely beaten within an inch of his life and is kept unconscious.
TRAVIS: FCG, take your meat tongue out of his mouth.
MARISHA: (laughs)
SAM: Sorry, I was practicing.
LAURA: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Is this how you take the temperature?
MARISHA: Oh my god.
LIAM: 99.8.
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: I'll use the barest minimum thing I can, a 1st-level Healing Word on him.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: Because, you know. there are several ways I can take temperature.
MARISHA: Oh god.
SAM: Where's my d4?
LAURA: Don't you have a 1st-level Cure Wounds? Or is that a 2nd-level?
SAM: Do I? I think-- I don't know.
MATT: Cure Wounds is also 1st-level.
SAM: Oh, I can do a 1st-level Cure Wounds.
MATT: One's an action and one's a bonus action.
LAURA: Healing Word is like what's the point?
SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1st-level Cure Wounds.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: And I get an extra d4.
LAURA: That's just fucking him for no reason.
MARISHA: You just don't want to touch him.
SAM: Wow.
MARISHA: You're like, ew!
SAM: Real bad. Five points total.
MATT: Five points total.
ASHLEY: That's all right.
TRAVIS: Better than he had.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: That's true. The gentleman, who looks like he's seen quite a bit of conflict in his life, you can get a glance that he's maybe in his mid to late 40s, but he looks older than he is, probably just from a harsh life, short white hair against his tan skin, the heavy, swollen elements of his cheeks and the heavy swelling around one eye. His armor is blood-spattered, but you do see, both pushed into his armor, though it is damaged and bent in, a double-headed axe that also acts as a scale, which you recognize to be the symbol of the Lawbearer. But as he comes to consciousness-- "(groans)"
SAM: It's okay, you're all right. You're alive. You're among friends. We're not them.
LIAM: We're on a super tight timeframe. Who are you? What happened?
SAM: Tell us your story. Where did you come from? What are your goals?
TRAVIS: We are with--
SAM: Oh yeah, we're-- Who are we with?
TRAVIS: Council of Tal'Dorei, Allura Vysoren.
TALIESIN: Well, let's find out.
MATT: You see him licking the inside of his lip, and you see there's missing teeth in the front. "I am Ishto."
SAM: Ishto?
TRAVIS and LIAM: Ishto.
LAURA: Don't we recognize that name? We know that name. We know that name. We've heard that name before. Can't we remember how we knew that name?
MATT: I don't think you know this name.
LAURA: Really? Okay.
MARISHA: We just met an Ish-something.
SAM: I think he just said we don't know the name.
TRAVIS: History check.
MATT: You haven't met this person. (laughter)
LAURA: Got it, got it, got it.
TRAVIS: He's like, "I'm making this name up. You've never met him."
LIAM: Tell me more about the chair. (laughter)
MATT: "I am a holy warrior of the Lawbringer out of Aeshanadoor. Who sent you?"
LAURA: The Lawbringer or bearer?
SAM: The Lawbearer.
LIAM: Bearer.
LAURA: But he said bringer?
MATT: Bearer.
LAURA: Okay.
TRAVIS: He's lying!
LAURA: I know!
TRAVIS: He's a fucking liar!
SAM: He's been hit in the head! He's got a head wound!
ASHLEY: I wrote down Lawbearer, and then I crossed it out.
LAURA: I know. Now it's a scribble.
MATT: Sorry, Lawbearer. Lawbringer is Menoth from Warmachine.
TRAVIS: Yes.
LAURA: Okay.
SAM: You play Warmachine?
MATT: Back in the day.
SAM: We're with--
TALIESIN: I'd like to--
SAM: Oh, sorry, you're going?
TALIESIN: Is this actually even necessary? We're in here. We're running a mission.
TRAVIS: You're talking to people?
TALIESIN: No, telepathically.
LAURA: Oh, yeah.
TALIESIN: No, I mean--
ASHLEY: Why are you in prison? Why are you in shaggles?
LAURA: Shaggles.
ASHLEY: What happened?
LAURA: What's with your shags?
MATT: "I was part of a crew that was coming to gather information. I think I may be the only one who survived, or at least suffered a lesser fate."
LAURA: What did you learn? Do you know how to get across the bridge?
MATT: "We couldn't get close enough. There were too many-- Too many protective sigils."
LAURA: Where are the sigils?
MATT: "I don't know. I'm not the one to look for them. I was there for protection."
TRAVIS: What do they do when they're activated, the sigils?
MATT: "They turn you to stone."
SAM: Your voice is so--
TRAVIS: Sexy, I know.
TALIESIN: No shit.
MARISHA: Where are the sigils? Are they traps on the ground? I'm not there, so someone else-- (coos)
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: Well, you're in our brain. All of us are relaying-- yeah, yeah, yeah, we tell it.
MARISHA: Oh, that's right.
TRAVIS: Balls, wang, boobies. (laughter)
SAM: Who sent you? Sorry.
TRAVIS: Butts.
MARISHA: Get off the Slack channel! (laughs)
ASHLEY: You came in a group. Who put the group together?
SAM: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Why did you come here?
MATT: "Why are you here? Same reasons."
SAM: Yeah, but we came from the Council of Tal'Dorei and from Whitestone.
ASHLEY: Might be the same reasons.
SAM: Are you from the same, from Tal'Dorei, or somewhere else?
MATT: "Glistening Spire in Yios. The City of Flowing Light."
LAURA: Great. Can you break his chains?
TALIESIN: I'm going to take out my lock picks and deal with the chains.
MATT: Go for it.
LAURA: Look, we have to hurry.
MATT: Dex plus proficiency.
TALIESIN: Dex plus proficiency?
LAURA: We've got very little time.
MATT: If you're proficient in it.
LAURA: You want to heal him up and have him fight with us?
TRAVIS: That's actually what I do really well.
MARISHA: I'm standing guard, by the way.
TALIESIN: Are you going to do it?
TRAVIS: I can, if you want.
TALIESIN: Let me try, and then you can do it.
TRAVIS: Okay.
SAM: Old timer. How old are you?
MATT: "I'm 47."
TALIESIN: 23.
LAURA: God, he's so old.
SAM: Old timer.
LIAM: Oh god.
LAURA: Super duper old.
ASHLEY: Oh, he's a puppy.
SAM: Do you wish to keep fighting? We could heal you and you could fight alongside us. Or do you wish to get out of here?
MATT: "It is my goal to help save this realm. If it means to live to fight another day or give my life on this one, it is what it is."
ASHLEY: Well, can we at least fix up his eye or something? He can't even--
SAM: I think maybe that's just him.
LAURA: No, I think it's just swollen. He's puffy right now.
SAM: Maybe he's just winking.
TALIESIN: He's out of his chains at this point. It was a 23.
MATT: 23? Okay. So it takes you a moment across this conversation, but you do eventually get the chains free.
LAURA: We've got to go. We've got to move.
ASHLEY: Wait, wait, what did Otohan want with you? Did she say anything?
MATT: "Otohan? No."
LAURA: Who'd you piss off?
TALIESIN: Have we insight checked him?
LIAM: No, I was about to.
LAURA: Good idea.
LIAM: Insight check on this guy.
MATT: Go for it.
LAURA: You too, you too. You're the insighter.
ASHLEY: Okay.
LIAM: That's a 15.
ASHLEY: Insight? Do you want me to assist you?
TRAVIS: 23.
LAURA: You fucking roll. You are insightful.
TRAVIS: Roll!
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: (laughs)
SAM: Terrible.
MATT: Do your thing, you!
ASHLEY: 18, 18.
LAURA: Still better.
ASHLEY: You rolled a lot better.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: A whisper?
LAURA: 18 is better--
SAM: A whisper from Ishto?
LAURA: Didn't he roll a 23?
LIAM: Mishto?
SAM: Oh, wait, two whispers?
TALIESIN: No. 17.
SAM: He did, but he gets a shitty whisper, and she gets a good whisper.
LIAM: What was that last phrase?
SAM: Shitty whisper? Good whisper? That's what I said.
MARISHA: Did he say where the sigils were?
LAURA: No.
SAM: Guys, wizkids.io slash-- Something plush.
LAURA: We suck so hard.
MARISHA: We suck so hard. We just asked him 30 questions, and he's answered two, because that's all he's had time for.
LAURA: Because we keep--
MARISHA: Because we keep asking him questions.
LAURA: We interrupt him before his answer.
SAM: We really need to learn how to do this better.
LIAM: Orym says out loud: We need to figure this shit out. I'm going to run over to this outcrop outside, and you don't need to move me, but just make sure, I'm going to start using my eyes for what they're good for and make sure we're not going to get jumped.
MATT: Okay, perception check.
MARISHA: I'm already standing guard, too.
LIAM: But I have incredible eyes!
MARISHA: (shouts) All right, fine!
MATT: Both of you roll perception.
MARISHA: Okay.
TRAVIS: Ishto, could you point out any of the sigils that you saw before you were so fucked up?
MATT: "I could try. They're hidden, and they've changed it since the first map that we had."
TRAVIS: I slit his throat. I'm just kidding.
LAURA: No... just...
MARISHA: (laughs)
TALIESIN: That's why I didn't say--
SAM: Do you do magical healing as well, or are you just a fighter sort?
MATT: "No, I can, but I'm a bit expended."
SAM: Oh, okay. I'll give you another 1st-level Cure Wounds.
ASHLEY: May I go over to one of the Reilorans and try to take off the chain?
SAM: Eight more points.
ASHLEY: Take one of those?
MATT: Sure, you can retrieve its chain. Eight more points? All right.
SAM: This guy's rocking 13 hit points.
MATT: He is.
MARISHA: (coos) Me, in your heads. Ask him where the fucking sigils are.
LAURA: We did! He didn't see them.
TRAVIS: I was sitting right next to you.
LAURA: He didn't see them yet.
MARISHA: Oh, wait.
LIAM: She's outside, she doesn't know.
TRAVIS: Oh, that's true.
MARISHA: It's windy!
TRAVIS: He said he would try.
TALIESIN: He had a map.
MARISHA: Try? Okay.
LAURA: Wait, wait, wait.
MATT: "The ones that go off, I think, are used so they make more. There is a constant shifting layout that is hidden. They're invisible."
TRAVIS: Not to me.
MATT: "Your best bet would be to ask someone who knows. Either force them to your will--"
ASHLEY: Wait, did you say you had a map?
MATT: "Be careful."
TALIESIN: It wouldn't work, though.
LAURA: Oh, it wouldn't work? Okay.
TALIESIN: Because they move.
LAURA: I can--
TRAVIS: Not a problem.
LIAM: Chetney's got us.
SAM: What weapon do you fight with? Do you need us to give you a weapon? I'm sure they took yours.
MATT: "Either a big sword or hammer is preferable, but I can use whatever you give me."
SAM: Do you guys have anything extra? I have a--
LAURA: I have a dagger in my--
ASHLEY: Here, take one of these chains.
SAM: Ooh!
LAURA: Nice.
MATT: You look at it. They're not regular round chains. They have an angled trapezoid vibe to it, and they're a little bit hooked at each end, so even just the blades, if they were to run across somebody it would take a chunk out, and the actual blade at the end has the faintest barb at the tip, and then right at the base there's these two little barbs on each side, so it's meant to stab and then pull.
TRAVIS: Ooh!
LIAM: Orym, in your head: Is anything else useful on the Reiloran?
LAURA: Yeah. I was searching.
TRAVIS: I'll search another one. Investigation, maybe?
MATT: Sure.
TALIESIN: Yeah, we did the room.
LAURA: Can I assist you? Because I was searching, too.
TRAVIS: Sure. 22.
MATT: Okay, there looks to be, on each of them, there are, for lack of a better term, snack pouches that have these dense bread beads, as well as this dried jerky that has a dull gray coloration to it that smells of smoke. There's no coinage on them. They don't have any on them, or at least don't have them out and about right now. They have their weapons on them. They have chains. They have their spiked armor. They have their bladed bracers. Anything you want to take with you, it'll take a minute to take it all off, because it's still affixed to them heavily and you're running low on time.
LAURA: All right, let's move it.
TALIESIN: Or we could take a second and throw them in the pit, if we want.
LAURA: No, he keeps saying unrolling the pit is not a fast thing. Let's go.
TALIESIN: It's not a fast thing. All right, where are we going?
LAURA: We move them up against the wall and hope for the best.
LIAM: Yeah, we're on the move.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: All right.
SAM: One more Cure Wounds on Ishto.
TRAVIS: No amulets, no charms, no necklaces, no badges?
MARISHA: Pump three Cure Wounds in this guy?
MATT: Nothing that you notice outside of what's on them, yeah.
TALIESIN: Do we have something for him to wear so it's not a fucking--
SAM: 11 more points of healing.
LAURA: We have an extra. We had a couple of the-- We'll take something off the guards that we just killed. No, we didn't kill the guards.
LIAM: We didn't kill any guards.
LAURA: But we had some extra ones, and then they handed us more when we came.
TRAVIS: What are you talking about?
LAURA: A robe.
LIAM: But you'd have to unroll the hole.
LAURA: Oh. Well, fuck it.
SAM: He could be our prisoner.
TRAVIS: On the Reiloran, do they have any armor? Forearm armor, a bracer or anything like that?
MATT: They do, they each have a heavy mid-arm bracer that carries the blade in it.
TRAVIS: I will take that, I'll take that off, just the one, and put it in the bag of holding.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: Ishto, he had shackles, right?
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
SAM: We'll take the shackles. He can be our prisoner if we get stopped.
LAURA: Okay, we'll walk him down.
TALIESIN: Can you fake the shackles?
MATT: "I can certainly try to."
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: He grabs and holds onto them.
LAURA: How much time has passed?
MATT: At this point in time, all the searching and stuff, you're getting closer to 10 minutes.
LIAM: We've got to go.
SAM: Go, go, go, go, go!
ASHLEY: Can we take the extra chain off the other Reiloran?
MATT: You want to take both chains?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: Sure. Both of the chains, the base of them seem to be attached to the breastplate, but that can be detached.
LIAM: My perception roll was a 30. Are we clear?
MATT: You seem clear at the moment. You also notice, the Bloody Bridge, it's flaring. The light is bright from it, and you watch as every now and then, a figure comes out, steps down the stairs, and then goes to walk to join the rest of the chaos.
TALIESIN: All right.
TRAVIS: As we start to move out, I'll also cast the first of two See Invisibilities through the Monocle of True Essence that lasts for an hour.
MATT: You got it.
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Let's go, go, go, go, go!
MATT: All right. As you begin to shift down and reach the base of this descent, you've now reached the open floor that is the residing bottom of the excavation site, the endless, rolling bits of crumbled ruins that were once an incredible finding being studied that since have been partially destroyed and become a makeshift structure for a militant base that surrounds the center of the Malleus Key. You can hear the still mounting swells of combat above that echo and shift and morph at this distance into this constant swishing sound of din that blends with the storm above. That red light of the bridge above, you begin to step in towards the center of what you hope to be your destination here, and onward towards the moon. We're going to take a break.
TRAVIS: Oh man. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Not great, not bad.
TALIESIN: That went pretty well.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SAM: We're alive.
TALIESIN: So far.
LIAM: We kept that contained.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: All things considered, not too bad.
SAM: By our amazing choices.
MATT: (laughs)
TALIESIN: All 50 of them.
SAM: Careful planning wins the day again.
MATT: A couple of functional things there. It worked out fine in the end, so far.
TALIESIN: We could have planned for hours and it would have worked out just like that, anyway.
LAURA: Yeah, honestly, though.
MARISHA: I still think tent kite could've been great.
TALIESIN: Tent kite could've been great.
MATT: It's never too late!
ASHLEY: I know.
TRAVIS: Yes, it is.
LIAM: Just a second, I'm going back for a tent.
TALIESIN: There's nothing more appropriate than Sam going, "Fuck it, Silence." We're like, "Yeah, there you go."
TRAVIS: "Did you see that tent falling through the excavation site?" "It's fine."
TALIESIN: Which one? Happens all the time.
LAURA: Gentle landing.
LIAM: Wee!
MATT: Nevertheless--
LAURA: Feet dangling out of the bottom.
MATT: We'll be right back.
LAURA: Sorry!
Break[]
(serious music) (fantasy music)
TALIESIN: Delve into a new tabletop roleplaying game of investigative horror with the "Candela Obscura Core Rulebook" using the Illuminated Worlds System by Darrington Press. Roam the turn-of-the-century- inspired setting of the Fairelands, including the bustling city of Newfaire and the ancient ruins of Oldfaire below. Assemble a circle of investigators within the paranormal secret society of Candela Obscura. You'll analyze strange and horrifying events, fight back against dangerous phenomena, and contain the bleed that spreads from corruptive magick. Choose from 10 custom character sheets to empower your investigations and explorations. Use tactical intuition and brawn with the Soldier specialty, use your charm with finesse and flair as the Magician specialty, or study and practice mystical arts as an Occultist. Explore districts of Newfaire, competing organizations, four full assignments, and dozens of example assignments to inspire you. If you choose to brave the role of Game Master, this guide contains everything needed to pave the way for your Candela Obscura investigators. Offered in both a standard edition as well as an ornate limited edition for collectors, the "Candela Obscura Core Rulebook" contains 204 art-filled pages, including maps, items, immersive notes, mysteries, and plenty more to power your very own story. Keep this tome close for the knowledge obtained may be the key to protecting you, your allies, and the Fairelands.
LAURA: Hey Critters! Laura Bailey here to guide you through what's new in the Critical Role shop. Can you put donuts in this? Only one way to find out. It's too powerful. This is pretty badass. It's the little things in life. Style should never be a dump stat, darling. Look at this. Isn't is fashion? So much fashion happening here. Oooh, so comfy cozy. This is a lot of stuff, you guys. We have so many cool things right now. And hey if you want, you could head over to the Critical Role shop right now.
TALIESIN: A dark bargain is struck from a place of anguish, and a wandering innocence aims to even the score, losing itself in the process. Curfew now falls on the streets of Groundswell as the Periphery aim to snuff out a local uprising. And though it's true that many assignments have violent beginnings, violent ends rarely bring a satisfying resolution. A wise investigator knows when it's best to sheathe the blade and bear the heart. The Circle of Tide and Bone. Assignment Number 37-13: Guardian of Groundswell.
(tense mysterious music)
Hi. We're the narrators of Midst. What's Midst? It's very simple. It's a weird surrealist fourth wall breaking reality bending science, fantasy space western about a small, doomed planet floating in a cosmic ocean of spooky darkness. Upon whose alien landscape an ensemble cast of characters, including a crotchety outlaw, a freakishly virtuous cultist and a diabolical businessman, make awful decisions and fight like hell to survive when the moon falls out of the sky and a large number of terrible things happened in rapid succession. It's exciting, it's funny, it's scary. It's got neat sound, weird music, amazing visuals, and every episode comes with bonus content you can read and examine. Midst is performed solely by yours truly. As the three of us narrate all the action, play all of the characters, and bend a lot of the rules about how telling stories is normally supposed to work. Midst is pretty fun, very strange, and it feels like VR for your brain. We believe you'll enjoy it. Or maybe you won't, but there's really only one way to find out. You're going to have to listen to Midst.
(epic music) (mischievous music) (typewriter clacking) (peaceful music)
SAM: When the forces of evil threaten Exandria, these heroes are there to answer the call.
TALIESIN: I'm Super Scanlan! With my Critical Role Twitch subscription, I can watch all my favorite CR shows before they come out on YouTube! Take that, evil doers!
ASHLEY: Here comes Jester with her Twitch subscription to Critical Role! She can access gnarly emotes and post links in the chat, too.
TALIESIN: Radical!
ASHLEY: Boosh! Oh no! Here comes some trolls to jam up our live chat.
TALIESIN: Don't worry, Laudna will stop them with the help of Critical Role's professional moderators!
ASHLEY: She's spooky, but I like her. Here comes Laudna's friend, Chetney! He has an Amazon Prime membership, which gives him one free Twitch subscription of his choice. Of course, he subscribes to Critical Role. It's the power of teamwork. Die, die, die!
TALIESIN: Ooh, I'm spooky!
ASHLEY: I cast Guiding Bolt!
TALIESIN: ♪ Scanlan's Hand! ♪
ASHLEY: Stab 'em, Chetney! And look! There's Caleb with the power of introspection and existential dread! [music stops] (cows mooing)
TALIESIN: Now that we've defeated all the bad guys, let's gift subscriptions to other users! You can do that by name or randomly. [record scratch]
MATT: Taliesin! Ashley! Please, I've told you so many times just don't play with those, okay? They're super fragile, custom made, custom painted. You know what? We have to film in about 30 minutes, so why don't you two just come with me. (snaps) Come on. (clicks tongue) [footsteps receding]
ASHLEY: Oh, it's Major Buzzkill here to take away all our fun.
TALIESIN and ASHLEY: Ah!
ASHLEY: Is it Thursday yet, bitch?
TALIESIN: You can certainly die!
ASHLEY: Oh! Good one!
TALIESIN: Loot his corpse! Take his vest!
ASHLEY: Goosh!
MATT: Would you please stop that?! [fast bright music]
ASHLEY: Grog smash!
SAM: Subscribe to Critical Role on Twitch and collect all 21 action figures. Alternate forms and familiars not included.
Part II[]
SAM: -- your daddy!
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: And welcome back. (laughter)
MATT: So--
SAM: Oh shit, we're in a battle.
MATT: Well.
LIAM: Maybe not.
MATT: You're not in a battle, you're in a battle zone.
SAM: Battle zone, battle zone.
MARISHA: ♪ Got to get you ready ♪
MATT: What do you do?
LAURA: Wait!
SAM: We're hurrying down the switchback.
LAURA: Chetney's in front because he's got the thing that he can see--
TRAVIS: See Invisibility, looking for rune traps
LAURA: We're pretending like we have--
TRAVIS: Rune wards.
SAM: Ashton, Ashton, hold onto Ishto and make him seem like he's your prisoner or something, because you're tough.
TRAVIS: He looks like a prisoner, but okay.
LIAM: Matt, is it Ishto? That's the name?
MATT: Ishto.
TRAVIS: Ishto.
LAURA: Ishto.
ASHLEY: Ishtar?
SAM: How far are we from the ground?
LIAM: Wasn't too far.
MATT: You're on the ground.
SAM: Oh.
MATT: You just reached the base, and you're now stepping out into the mass ruins slash military war encampment that now encompasses the entirety of the excavation site with the Malleus Key (intense flame burning)--
LIAM: Two Warders.
MATT: -- flaring in the center of it.
MARISHA: Two Warders. How many people do we see from here surrounding they Key?
LAURA: Yeah, what's our view?
MATT: Your view? The storm and dust is still going around. You have this massive red glow of the Key, and you can see the shadow outline of the ruins and the structures around you, but the strong light source you have is one central, very bright red light source, and it's diffused through the dust. So it's like looking through a dreamscape of red, a thing you're very familiar with.
LAURA: Yep.
LIAM: You said ruins, so it's not wide open in a storm. There's hunks of things that we could move around.
MATT: Oh yeah, there's structures, there's tents, there's embankments you can see. Also, more of those ballista at different stages. This place has been outfitted for a stronger defense, and you also can occasionally see shapes shifting through the ruins that move at the size and gait of additional Warders throughout.
LIAM: That's a tall glass of Warder.
MATT: You're the one who's keeping a watch?
TRAVIS: Yeah, with the See Invisibility.
MARISHA: That's how my grandma says it.
MATT: Go ahead and make a perception check for me, with disadvantage.
TRAVIS: Disadvantage, because of the sandstorm?
MATT: Correct.
SAM: Mm-mm, mm.
MATT: Now that you're into the open space where the dust is swirling around.
ASHLEY: It doesn't do anything? Does it only do something for Travis?
TRAVIS: Perception check?
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Nine.
MATT: Nine, okay.
TRAVIS: That was at disadvantage.
MATT: You do not see any glowing glyphs as you do your initial incursion into it. So, what is your path of travel? What are you doing as you begin to slowly step into the center?
LIAM: Is it possible, following Chetney, since he's the one who can spot landmines, to try to move, even though there are Warders, to move towards these ruins and structures and take it a bit at a time and hold if we can tell something is going by?
ASHLEY: Do a dance?
LIAM: So we can try to skirt from chunk of ruin--
LAURA: Skrrt!
LIAM: Yep.
TALIESIN: Is there also a worn path, would be my other question.
SAM: Are most folks down here scrambling about or holding their position?
MATT: You can't see many folks from the initial point where you're stepping in, but the few that you can see that are perched up on the top of partially ruined towers or structures, at the edge of these ballista, you can see maybe four of them, and they're holding their position. You're on the ground level looking up, so you don't have a lot of perspective.
SAM: Sure.
MATT: So you're going to have to watch it as you go.
LAURA: They're not seeing us right now, though?
MATT: Doesn't appear to be the case, no.
TALIESIN: I'll also say--
LAURA: It's been about 10 minutes? I'm sorry.
TALIESIN: No, go ahead, go ahead.
LAURA: It's been about 10 minutes?
MATT: A little over 10 minutes at this point, yeah.
LAURA: Okay.
TALIESIN: Also, I don't know if our prisoner gets the plus 10 bonus from Pass Without a Trace.
LAURA: Oh, because he wasn't present when it was cast?
TALIESIN: Mm-hm.
SAM: Probably not.
LAURA: There's an aura.
LIAM: I thought it was an aura because two people were out of it during the last thing.
ASHLEY: Let's see.
TALIESIN: It might be an aura.
MATT: "For the duration, each creature you choose within 30 feet."
TALIESIN: Okay, so yeah. All right.
ASHLEY: So I can choose him?
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Yeah, it's just good vibes only.
SAM: Choose me.
LAURA: Okay, so what I could do--
TALIESIN: Good to know.
LAURA: Just to make us seem more like we belong here, if we're planning on trying to look like we're not fucking around, because we have a prisoner with us, right? I can try to summon a Reiloran to walk with us.
LIAM: Oh, that's a great idea.
TALIESIN: Oh my god, that's brilliant.
MARISHA: That's a really cool idea.
LIAM: That's a great idea.
TRAVIS: Yeah!
LAURA: Yeah?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LIAM: Yes.
ASHLEY: That's a really good idea.
LIAM: Yes.
TRAVIS: Unless-- It will heed you?
LAURA: It's our ally.
TRAVIS: Okay.
LAURA: It is our ally.
TALIESIN: Because they need to get this prisoner up to the moon.
MARISHA: I know!
TALIESIN: For interrogation.
SAM: No, that's good.
TRAVIS: That's a great idea.
MARISHA: It's great. And you can make it more, it's more powerful now, so it looks corporeal?
LAURA: Mm-hmm.
MARISHA: Cool.
SAM: He'll have a tent on him.
LAURA: Yeah, and he's going to go--
MARISHA: Can he do stunts?
LAURA: (dramatic yelling)
SAM and ASHLEY: (laugh)
LIAM: He's going to pop a tent.
LAURA: I can choose which kind I want it to look like. I can make it look like--
TRAVIS: The juggernaut or the--
LAURA: Let me see. I imagine I can pull-- Well, these labels in here, I don't--
MATT: Those labels define what you can summon.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: They might seem similar to some you've encountered, but they're their own category.
LAURA: Got it.
TALIESIN: Something Command-y.
LIAM: Yeah, the one that we saw up top--
TALIESIN: The talker.
LIAM: -- seemed to be giving instructions to everyone.
LAURA: Sure, I think that's similar to... I see.
MARISHA: What is the question?
TALIESIN: What kind of--
LAURA: Reiloran.
TALIESIN: -- Reiloran we're going to summon.
LAURA: Reiloran. We want a look.
LIAM: She has her own subset of--
LAURA: Of ones I can pull.
MARISHA: Oh, can you do the Shrikes?
LAURA: I don't think so.
TALIESIN: I think a talker is better.
LAURA: I think that's a--
SAM: A nondescript Reiloran is fine.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Well, when a Reiloran meets a Reiloran walking through the--
TRAVIS: Taliesin.
TALIESIN: Sorry. (laughter)
TALIESIN: I didn't mean to go there, but there we are.
SAM: Oh, and Imogen, do you need some healing?
LAURA: Yes.
TALIESIN: Shit, that's right.
SAM: How much?
MARISHA: Because I wasted three on a stranger.
SAM: Yep.
LAURA: I'm 30 down.
LIAM: I'm going to ask a question while they doodle.
LAURA: I don't have that much to begin with.
LIAM: Does any of this look familiar to us from the last time we were here, enough that Orym could try to triangulate--
SAM: Spells or potions? I'll hit you with a 2nd-level Cure Wounds.
LIAM: -- where Planerider Ryn's--
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: -- petrified body is?
SAM: Actually, no.
MATT: You could probably do that with an investigation or survival check, your choice.
SAM: 1st-level Cure Wounds.
SAM: No. Second.
ASHLEY: I'll assist you.
LIAM: Okay.
ASHLEY: Because I was going to give a looksie for her, too.
SAM: I'm Cure Wounds-ing Imogen.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: I'm going to flea jump up onto--
SAM: 18 points.
LIAM: Ah!
LAURA: Ah!
LIAM: -- onto Fearne's shoulder to get a slightly higher vantage point and look around, and I will make this survival, not investigation.
LAURA: 18? That's great, thank you.
LIAM: This is at advantage because of Fearne's help?
MATT: This is, yes.
LIAM: Good. That is a 20.
MATT: A 20. Looking at where the Key is and looking at some of the structures around here, you remember some of the ruin arches and the different shapes that are being lit, like a backlit skyline of shadow against the light of the Malleus Key. Glancing about this with your extremely high perception, you mark out through memory these various landmarks and you know specifically where the stone body of Ryn was last, as well as where the general positioning of their last encounter here would be.
LIAM: Okay, and that's roughly how far away?
MATT: From where you are right now? A couple hundred feet.
LIAM: A couple hundred feet? Okay.
MATT: Maybe a little longer, a little further.
LIAM: That's a long way.
LAURA: I'm going to summon a hex mind.
MATT: A hex mind? Okay. All right. As you concentrate and begin to cast your spell, a familiar red energy begins to drift off of you. Moments before the Malleus Key initiated, you remember this red power being pulled from you, and as you're casting the spell in the proximity of it, the rest of you can see a red mist that's drifting off of her. You see the streaks of energy that sit within her skin begin to glow, and you also see a faint bit of it begin to drift off of Fearne that seems to pull away and gather in her hands, like this energy of the moon is making itself visibly known in this close space. It makes you nervous, but it doesn't feel different than before, and as you bring your hands around and pull it through, you watch as the tear in space swirls open. The shape pours out and stands on its feet, and there before you, you see a Reilora with a more feminine bone structure. You see its crest seems to divide into two that almost touch at the top. You see it blinks and looks up at you with its dark, open eyes, a look of curiosity.
LAURA: Welcome, friend, in its head.
MATT: It responds, "Thank you. We're here."
LAURA: We are.
MATT: "Hmm."
LAURA: We're trying to get back to Ruidus, for the time being.
MATT: "Very well."
LAURA: I'll need your help.
MATT: "Very well." You see it looking around, taking in the surroundings, taking in all of you.
LAURA: All right.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
TRAVIS: This is cool.
MATT: As you're leading on-- You know that scene in "Last Crusade"?
TRAVIS: My favorite.
MATT: J!
TRAVIS: (laughs) (stone falling)
MARISHA: Uh-huh, uh-huh.
MATT: I need you to make a wisdom saving throw.
TRAVIS: Ah!
LAURA: Oh no, for what?
MARISHA: You've got advantage.
LAURA: For what?
LIAM: Advantage because of Heroes' Feast.
SAM: Oh, did he not look?
LAURA: What happened?
TRAVIS: I rolled a nine with disadvantage on our perception check because of the sandstorm, so I probably missed something.
MATT: Actually, no, this would be-- Yeah, this would be wisdom.
TRAVIS: 15.
MATT: 15.
TRAVIS: Wisdom saving throw, right?
MATT: Let me double check real fast.
SAM: At advantage.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: Let me see.
TRAVIS: Dumbass.
MATT: No, constitution. My bad.
SAM: Uh-oh.
TRAVIS: Got it.
MATT: You should not have advantage, so just one roll.
TRAVIS: I do not.
MARISHA: But you're beefy. Oh yeah, you're beefy!
TRAVIS: 21.
MATT: 21. You step into a space, and you see some of the stonework of the recent struggles and wind have kicked up, and it obscured what suddenly flashes below you as one of these arcane glyphs, about two and a half feet across, the rest of you see it uplight underneath Chet as suddenly this flash surrounds him. These weird ribbons of energy streak up and grasp around his shoulders, and you feel like your body suddenly weighs four times what it should. In that moment, you reach within the beast that sits at the core of your being, and you feel the silent howl from within as it echoes. The ribbons shatter off of you, and the glyph goes inert. You resist the Flesh to Stone glyph.
SAM and ASHLEY: Ooh!
TRAVIS: Flesh to Stone!
LAURA: Fuck. Fuck! Can you perceive better?
TRAVIS: I can perceive better, but I'm going to give the bag of holding to FCG.
MARISHA: Because you have the restoration spell.
TRAVIS: I'm in front, so if I go to stone, then so does the bag.
MARISHA: We're fucked.
SAM: But I have--
LAURA: Still.
TRAVIS: So you can give the bag to somebody else.
MATT: Yeah, you would have gotten some material.
MARISHA: You have Greater Resto. (laughter)
MARISHA: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You have Greater Resto?
TRAVIS: He does.
SAM: Put it in your pouch.
TRAVIS: They do.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: Fearne, get the Greater Restoration spell out of the pouch and hand it to somebody else.
SAM: Well, no. That's why I'm giving it to Fearne, so she'll have one and I have one.
MARISHA: Okay.
ASHLEY: Wait, you have a Greater Restoration spell?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: In here.
MARISHA: Okay, okay, yeah.
ASHLEY: Oh, in there. Okay, okay.
MARISHA: It's fine, it's fine.
LAURA: They've got one and you've got one.
ASHLEY: All right, all right.
MATT: Yeah, and we'll say you probably acquired--
TALIESIN: Just in case.
MATT: Given the nature of the challenges ahead, you could have requested the material components for Greater Restoration for, we'll say--
ASHLEY: I'm going to write that down.
MATT: -- five castings for this journey.
SAM: Five castings of it?
MATT: 500 gold worth of diamond dust.
SAM: Oh, I think I actually have diamond dust.
MATT: Do you?
SAM: I did this for this reason.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: I have-- I'll look.
MATT: No worries. But yeah, you could have acquired probably a little more materials before you left the west encampment.
SAM: Okay, thank you.
ASHLEY: Does Imogen look like, does it look like there's way more-- I know you were saying she was lighting up, but is she still--
SAM: 300.
ASHLEY: Does she look different?
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: As you're maneuvering through these ruins, that casting of that spell that pulled the Reiloran through, you see that the veins, the weird little cracks of color that have been expanding across her since you first encountered each other are giving this faint, continuous glow, as opposed to--
ASHLEY: So they haven't grown.
MATT: They haven't grown.
ASHLEY: The ones that are there are just glowing.
MATT: The ones there are just glowing.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay. I make sure Laudna sees. Okay.
MATT: All right. Leading on to the next trek.
TRAVIS: Yes.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: Can I look and see if the activation of the trap, even though it was able to be shrugged off, did that seem to alert any action or eyes or anybody notice it?
MATT: Make a perception check.
TRAVIS: Eight.
MATT: Eight. Doesn't seem to be any problem.
SAM: How about this? I'm going to Enhance Ability on you and give you advantage on perception checks.
TRAVIS: Beautiful, I just had it.
SAM: You just had--
TRAVIS: (laughs) Advantage.
SAM: Oh shit.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: Well, on sight you don't have advantage. Just on scent.
LAURA: Oh.
TRAVIS: "Lets you spot, hear, or otherwise detect the presence of something."
MATT: Presence of something, yeah, but this is you seeing if anyone else noticed you. Certain other details like that, situationally it would be advantage-wise.
TRAVIS: Got it.
MATT: So for you, your heightened senses would be, I guess, depending on the situation here, it would be-- Hmm.
TRAVIS: It says, you might try to hear a conversation through a door, eavesdrop under an open window, hear monsters, try to spot things that are obscured or easy to miss, whether they are orcs laying an ambush on the road--
MATT: Yeah, that's the--
TRAVIS: Beasts hiding in the shadows.
MATT: But for your heightened senses?
TRAVIS: Just hear and smell, maybe, instead of see?
MATT: Yeah, it's more about the sense of the--
TRAVIS: I dig it.
MATT: The scents around you.
TRAVIS: Cool, yeah, I'll take it that it--
SAM: All right, you have advantage on all perception and all wisdom.
LIAM: So we have a Reiloran, right?
LAURA: Yes.
LIAM: We're in costume.
TALIESIN: We have a prisoner that we have to take to the moon.
LIAM: Let's, I guess we're--
MARISHA: Are we taking him to the moon?
TALIESIN: Why not? What else are we going to do?
LAURA: Otohan has called for him, for interrogation purposes.
MARISHA: Right, I know, but I'm saying in my head, but right before we hit the bridge, are we going to be like (shoves).
LIAM: That's a death sentence for him.
MARISHA: We're not taking him to the moon, are we?
TALIESIN: We'll see how it goes.
SAM: What do we do with him?
LAURA: We've got to take him.
MARISHA: Just ditch him.
LAURA: We aren't going to just ditch him.
LIAM: He's a dead man here.
ASHLEY: What do you want to do?
MATT: "Whatever is asked of me. I'm to give my life for this cause."
MARISHA: Do you want to go to the moon?
MATT: "If it will help."
TRAVIS: This dude's real.
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: "The Lawbearer presents then yes, but--"
TRAVIS: (laughs) "If it will help."
ASHLEY: Wait, wait. When you came here, what was your original plan?
MATT: "I was assigned to protect those who were leading this charge."
LAURA: And they're dead?
MATT: "They're gone."
LAURA: So, he's real good at what he does.
SAM: (laughs)
LAURA: Y'all hear in your head. I don't say it out loud.
TRAVIS: Wow.
LAURA: I don't say it out loud!
TRAVIS: Wow.
LIAM: You hear the entire time in your head go:
LIAM, LAURA, ASHLEY, and TALIESIN: Wow. (laughter)
LIAM: All right, let's do this.
MARISHA: We'll play it by ear.
ASHLEY: I feel like it's up to you. It's your life. You're free now. You get to do what want with it.
LIAM: Here we go.
SAM: Yes.
TALIESIN: Yep. Let's roll.
MATT: "Well, I have no real way of getting out of here myself at the moment." He looks up at the wild surroundings as you hear another (explosion). A fireball explodes, this massive blast of flame and light that lights up on the far end, as bits of stone crumble and fall off to the side. You hear some shouts in the distance. The battle is still raging up above.
TRAVIS: Let's go, let's go!
LAURA: Let's go, let's go!
ASHLEY: To the moon. To the moon.
SAM: And back.
MATT: So he comes along with you. You are going to helm this next trek using your directional sense from your previous time here to find the best place. Go ahead and roll another perception check for me.
TRAVIS: 19.
MATT: 19.
LAURA: You got to be Guiding him. Can you be Guiding him?
SAM: I already gave him fucking advantage. Sure.
ASHLEY: I can Guide him. I can Guide him.
MATT: You all are walking through confidently or moving through stealthily?
TRAVIS: I get advantage on perception checks, right?
SAM: Stealthily.
MARISHA: Stealthily--
LAURA: Until we're spotted.
MARISHA: -- until we need to be confident.
MATT: All right. Then I'd also like a group stealth check.
MARISHA: All right.
MATT: The first leg of this slow pursuant trek, you managed to point out--
TALIESIN: No advantage or advantage?
LAURA: Yes!
MATT: -- four--
LAURA: No advantage.
MATT: -- different glyphs along the way that you stop and point out to everyone to prevent yourselves from--
MARISHA: Hell yes.
MATT: -- multiple members of your troop from stepping into and--
LAURA: Fuck yeah!
MATT: -- possibly becoming their own statues.
TRAVIS: Got it.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: You get the sense these happen pretty rapidly.
TRAVIS: Like (successively forming statues)
MATT: Make an investigation check for me.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MARISHA: Oh boy.
TRAVIS: I do have-- Whenever you look around in clues, make deductions, it says, Hunter's Bane. Would this be advantage?
MATT: No, that would be surrounding the creatures that you are bound to.
TRAVIS: 13.
MATT: 13. Okay.
TRAVIS: No, sorry, 12.
MATT: 12. Okay. Yeah. You've seen these four things. You're not seeing a pattern or a marker or some sort of visual element here. For the Reilorans and/or the Vanguard to be moving through here with confidence and swiftness with this number of trapped spaces, there either has to be an indicator or something protective. So, that catches your mind, but you're uncertain what that might be.
LAURA: I wish I ganked that from-- Sorry.
SAM: You didn't know what it was.
LAURA: No.
SAM: All right.
MATT: But you continue pushing on. You are now about halfway from where you started at the base floor of here, and now weaving through these ruins. Stealth check?
MARISHA: Do we still have Pass Without a Trace?
LAURA and ASHLEY: Yes.
MARISHA: 32.
SAM: 15.
ASHLEY: 28.
LAURA: Natural 20 for 32.
ASHLEY: Yes!
LIAM: 30.
TALIESIN: 35.
MATT: Stealth check?
TRAVIS: What did I roll?
MATT and ASHLEY: (laugh)
MARISHA: Did you roll another check?
TRAVIS: I'm sure it's like a 30.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA and ASHLEY: (laugh)
SAM: That's how this works, right, Matt?
MATT: Yeah, yeah, totally.
TALIESIN: I know.
TRAVIS: 34.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: 19 for the Reiloran.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Is that with the plus 10?
TRAVIS: 39 or something.
MATT: Okay. Yeah. Unseen, unheard, unnoticed, you begin to dart through sections of partially crumbled ancient stone behind what look to be small makeshift barracks carved from the very rock of the ground, magically crafted, not unlike elements of the west encampment that you had prepared before this encounter. The light of the bridge gets brighter and brighter upon approach. You clamber up the side of one of the nearby wall posts and look in the direction of where Ryn's stone form was, and do not see it.
LAURA: (groans)
LIAM: Okay.
SAM: Oh no.
LIAM: Okay. Neither piece.
SAM: Do not see it.
TRAVIS: She'll be on the moon.
MATT: But since that is close to the--
TRAVIS: They?
MARISHA: I think it was a she.
MATT: You are getting a decent look of near the base of the tower. You can see there's a larger stair structure now that leads up towards the base of where the actual bridge itself progresses. You can see there are two Warders that are slowly rotating around its base. There are two ballista.
TRAVIS: She.
MARISHA: She. Okay.
MATT: Your passive perception is so high. You see a Ruin-Crawler, one of the assault tripod crawlers is also situated, stationary on the opposite side of where it is, where you see one person up manning the turret guns on top. This is a pretty--
LIAM: We got two giant robots. We've got two of the ballistas on the same level as the Warders, and a tank, a mecha tank.
SAM: But unlike upstairs, we can't just smash and dash through. They'll come after us.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: We have to go in without anyone seeing us. So that means distraction.
TALIESIN: Orym.
MARISHA: I still have one more EMP field, if we can hit all three.
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: How far are we from--
SAM: It's a 20 foot radius.
ASHLEY: -- what looks like the entrance to the--
LAURA: Can we see a separate--
MATT: Actually, I'd say at this distance, I can set down a visual perspective of where it is.
LAURA: Yes, yes, yes, yes!
TALIESIN: We're also-- We look official.
SAM: We do.
LIAM: There's a chance.
SAM: I don't have my thing anymore for the battle cam.
TALIESIN: We specifically have a-- Oh.
SAM: Because I read it once already.
LIAM: Let's see how coerced together the Warders are.
SAM: Something something WizKids minis.
LIAM: I'm saying "water" in a Kentucky accent.
SAM: I'm sure they'll love that.
MARISHA: Warder? That's how my grandma says it, is warder.
TRAVIS: Hello.
TALIESIN: Cool. Okay, that's a thing.
LIAM: Hey, we're back. And we are back.
SAM: Oh, there's this place.
LAURA: Whoa, yes!
LIAM: Wow.
LAURA: Oh, I remember that thing.
LIAM: Holy moly.
LAURA: Uh-oh, I remember this place.
SAM: It's folded in half in once piece.
LAURA: One of the ballista guys fell.
ASHLEY: Whoa!
TALIESIN: I don't think I've done that place, to be honest.
ASHLEY: Whoa, look at his mess!
SAM: Whoa!
MARISHA: It is messy.
ASHLEY: Whoa!
MARISHA: They've done a lot.
LAURA: Yeah, they've been building up.
SAM: They need Feng Shui.
LIAM: Is that the purple ball and that thing, or is it just a coincidence?
ASHLEY: This is cool.
MATT: That's just a part of the device itself.
ASHLEY: What the heck is that thing?
LIAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: You do not see Vax or anything.
LAURA: Is that one the--
MARISHA: That's the crawler.
LAURA: The crawler.
SAM: This looks like everything that Matt had left over just lying around. (laughter)
MATT: Just throw it on, I don't fucking care.
MARISHA: So, wait, where are we coming from? This direction?
MATT: Hmm. At this point, you guys would be probably coming from this side.
LAURA: Oh, okay, okay.
TALIESIN: So we need to get up those stairs.
LAURA: Yes.
SAM: I feel like distractiony things could work.
MARISHA: So, I could--
TALIESIN: We have a--
MARISHA: I could try--
LAURA: Look at this giant!
MARISHA: -- my Phantasmal Force.
SAM: Yeah?
MARISHA: And see if they all get distracted by something.
SAM: I don't know if those robots are going to get affected by--
LAURA: Can you make it look like something's coming in from above?
MARISHA: I "create an illusion that takes root in the mind of the creatures you can see within range. The target must make an intellect saving throw. Or make a Phantasmal object creature or visible phenomenon. But it has no effect on undead or constructs."
SAM: Constructs. Those are constructs.
LAURA: Shit.
MARISHA: Fuck!
TRAVIS: We also have a paladin of the Lawbearer that wants to be useful.
SAM: Yeah, we could send him running through, saying, "Hey, kill me, kill me." (laughs)
TRAVIS: Yeah.
SAM: Or we could tell him-- This is all in our heads. We could tell him that we're making him invisible. You're invisible now. No one can see you.
LAURA: No! Don't be a dick! Don't do that.
SAM: Sneak around the--
TRAVIS: (laughs)
LAURA: We take him to the bridge with us. We take him through the bridge and then we have him--
SAM: I mean.
MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)
LIAM: We are still, because of Fearne, really fucking stealthy right now.
MARISHA: Take all your clothes off.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: We're over on this corner, and all it's looking over here is the warder and--
MATT: That helps to give you a little bit of perspective there.
LIAM: -- one of the ballistas-- Matt, is there a person manning that ballista that I can't see?
MATT: Over here?
LIAM: No, in front of the warder.
MATT: Right here?
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: No, not at the moment.
MARISHA: Are the Warders doing a patrol?
MATT: They are. They're both moving around.
LIAM: If he were to go the other way, we might be able-- If we can skip the stairs and go up that building's roof.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: To get on there.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: I don't know if there's a way for all of us.
LAURA: Can we send in one of the EMP things again? At least to shut down the Warder near us?
SAM: Sure. Sure.
LAURA: Maybe we can time it to where when he gets close to the crawler, it'll shut down both of them. Because he gets within 20 feet of it at some point. Chet, can you go invisible again?
TRAVIS: If you make me.
LAURA: Okay.
TRAVIS: I used mine.
LAURA: I can also use Telekinesis to send it over.
SAM: Fearne can also be a little animal that goes in.
LAURA: That's true.
TALIESIN: With a giant piece of tech on top.
LAURA: But it's got to be a carrying thing.
LIAM: Hi. If they come together and Chet can set off EMP there, we can all be coming in from over here, and then Chet, invisible, can beeline for the steps and meet us.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Chet doesn't have another invisible unless Imogen gives it to him.
LAURA: I can do that.
MARISHA: Because it's a lower level.
LAURA: It's a 1st-level, I think.
MATT: 2nd-level.
LAURA: 2nd-level. I can do it.
LIAM: This map is gorgeous.
LAURA: But it's concentration. I will lose the Reiloran.
SAM: Or we send our paladin over to the ballista to start shooting at stuff. Then everyone will go over to--
ASHLEY: Or get the paladin to take over the EMP.
LAURA: That's true.
MARISHA: You have the Reiloran. Could the Reiloran try and get their attention?
SAM: With a little tap dance routine?
MARISHA: Razzle dazzle. Yeah.
LAURA: That's asking a lot of a person that doesn't understand fully what we're doing.
LIAM: A little early internet dancing baby?
TRAVIS: And just to say it, the Reiloran, plus Imogen, plus all of us in garb, we don't want to just walk towards it?
SAM: We could. I don't see why not.
LAURA: But I still think we should shut these guys down if we can.
SAM: Do we see anybody walking up the stairs or just a few people coming down the stairs?
MATT: Nobody is on the stairs at the moment. There is a number of Reilorans and watchmen and folks that are keeping eyes on the bases, weapons at the ready, defenses at the ready. And of course, the two Warders that are very tightly rotating around and keeping watch.
LIAM: This has got a man on it. So if this gets EMPed, which is great, he's going to be like, "My machine's down. Something's wrong." So, that will draw focus.
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: Here.
SAM: His machine, by the way, just for clarity--
LIAM: Yeah?
SAM: -- won't be down unless it's magic.
LAURA: Which it kind of... is not.
ASHLEY: I could see if Mister could take it over there, too.
LAURA: That's true.
LIAM: He's got one of those Gatling guns in there.
MATT: Make an arcana check.
SAM: Huh?
MATT: Make an arcana check.
SAM: Arcana check!
LAURA: Yeah, I remember how terrible that--
SAM: Hey, it's cocked. Terrible. Seven.
MATT: All right.
MARISHA: We've had to get those magic crystals before to power--
LAURA: That's true.
MARISHA: -- the crawlers. So it might take out the magic crystally thing.
LAURA: In the Reiloran's head that's with us, I'm going to say: These soldiers down here, are they friendly to you or foe?
MATT: "These are of the Vanguard, correct?"
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: "These are aligned with the Imperium. So, no."
TALIESIN: (whispers) Imperium. Well, that changes--
LIAM: Is that the first drop of that word.
SAM: Imperium?
LIAM: Or am I forgetting it.
MATT: Imperium. About this time, you notice at first, Orym, but there is a (fluttery wisps) flutter of energy that is cascading down the bridge, before there's a flash. At the top of the steps, you see as two figures, three figures, four figures emerge. You see one of them appears to be a Reiloran with that massive headdress of chains and long flowing multi-part cloaks. It doesn't even touch the ground. It just floats in the air and glides around as it stands there. It looks like itself is manipulating the world and gravity around it, as it takes in this space around it. Second one that emerges looks to be a Vanguard figure of somewhat elevated stature. You see a mantle that stretches with wider shoulders. There are strips of material that have language written upon them that dangle just past the mid-waist figure with, it's a tall, thin, almost elvish figure with long ears. You can't make out details this far away. One looks like a soldier that begins to descend to the steps. Another one that you see with a thick cloak mantle that flows around tight leather armor with sheathed weapons and shortish gray hair, as you see Otohan Thull steps through. In that brief moment of stillness, you see as she steps out, looks up in the air, "Maintain the perimeter and double siege defenses! Foot soldiers regroup and do not abandon the Key!"
LAURA: Uh-oh.
MATT: "Fools!" She looks over in the direction of the battle and you watch as she jumps 80 feet over onto the edge of the ruin, jumps off another again, and does a three-point jump completely skipping most of the central ruins and almost seeming to fly into the storm before vanishing in the direction of the main conflict.
TRAVIS: Coward!
MARISHA: Can I check my Treshi scry ball?
MATT: Yes, you can. Indeed, you see the glow.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: It still works.
ASHLEY: Okay, okay.
MARISHA: It still fucking works. That's crazy. Okay.
SAM: Wait. We did the scroll of the anti--
LAURA: Mass Nondetection.
SAM: Yeah, yeah, we did that, right?
LAURA: Yeah. So they can't feel us.
LIAM: We now have new players on the field.
TALIESIN: That also means that this combat is going to end real soon. But we do have an opportunity here.
MATT: Here is the--
LAURA: Oh god! I don't like that one!
MATT: -- accompanying one. That is now hovering and keeping a watch over this space. It seems to be like--
SAM: Distraction!
MATT: You watch as it looks down and points towards different figures around, they acknowledge, and then change their movement. You immediately get the sense that there are telepathic orders and guidance being given by this figure to the surrounding-- A unifying vision and overview of everyone in the area.
SAM: We've got to draw all these people away from this thing. We just can't go up there. They're going to see us, they're going to attack us, they're going to follow us. How?
LIAM: Is there a way, casters, not me, to EMP these two things together and simultaneously set off something big over there?
SAM: Possibly.
LIAM: So that this is down and everyone's focused there, and then we make a run for it?
SAM: Can you refresh me with one thing, Dungeon Master?
MATT: Yes.
SAM: These Warders, we hacked one last time, right?
MATT: You did. You destroyed it to the point where it was functional, but the center of its core you had managed to jack into, if you will.
SAM: So we could, in theory, shut one down with the EMP, I could crawl in there and try to commandeer it, if that helps us at all.
MATT: You could, you'd have to wait the minute for the radius to stop.
SAM: Yes.
MATT: You'd have to successfully--
SAM: Yes.
MATT: -- commandeer it.
SAM: Yes.
MATT: But it's not impossible.
TALIESIN: That's a long shot.
ASHLEY: If you wanted--
SAM: Sure.
ASHLEY: -- to do that illusion thing or whatever, I could do something that could--
SAM: Make a big boom?
ASHLEY: Make everybody have disadvantage on intelligence checks or saving throws.
LIAM: There is a ton of enemies on this field.
MARISHA: They're all so spread out.
LIAM: So I feel like we have to get them off the Key.
SAM: Yeah.
LIAM: Make a run for it and just go.
LAURA: Yeah, we just got to go.
SAM: Yeah, but that means drawing them somewhere else. So what is that draw?
MARISHA: They're so spread out. But maybe we still--
ASHLEY: I know.
MARISHA: -- do one really big boom.
MATT: The figure moves over here and jumps into one of the--
MARISHA: A combined boom.
MATT: -- skirmishers.
MARISHA: To see if they run.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Maybe all three can combine--
ASHLEY: And make something big?
MATT: There's now a skirmisher that is doing a patrol as well.
MARISHA: -- force in some Fireballs.
TALIESIN: Shit.
LIAM: It's on the move.
MARISHA: To make it super big.
TALIESIN: The longer we take, the worse this is going to fucking get.
LIAM: Yeah.
LAURA: We just got to go.
SAM: We could commandeer the skirmisher. Just drive it around, smashing into shit. Tell the paladin to just drive.
LIAM: Who and how? Or we could make a really big explosion.
MARISHA: I think that's our way.
LIAM: In the corner.
MARISHA: Which is try and make a big explosion.
SAM: What about this lightning thing? Can we aim it?
TALIESIN: How?
SAM: The lightning pulse thing. Does it have controls or anything, a guy manning it at all?
TRAVIS: Which one are you pointing to?
MATT: Right over here.
LAURA: The ball.
MATT: You could try and inspect it if you could, if you got closer. If somebody with a sense of arcana wanted to get a closer look.
TRAVIS: I'll go over there, you want me to check it out?
SAM: Yeah.
LAURA: Do you have arcana?
SAM: Just see if it has controls.
TRAVIS: Where are we right now?
MATT: You're over in this space.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll sneak up to it.
MATT: All right, make a stealth check for me.
TALIESIN: There is a bolt-thrower, too.
LAURA: Guide him.
SAM: No.
TRAVIS: 19.
SAM: That's not how it works.
LAURA: Yes, it is!
SAM: It's not! If he's walking 60 feet away from me, I can't Guide.
LAURA: If he was standing next--
SAM: It lasts for--
LAURA: -- to you when you--
SAM: -- six seconds. But I can't stand next to him, he's walking way far away from me.
MATT: You dart through.
LIAM: Kids.
MATT: Get up to the edge of this. As this soldier up here begins to carefully go down the steps. You're now up over the edge. You're still in wolf form, correct?
TRAVIS: Yes.
MATT: So you would be right up against this device here.
TRAVIS: Sweet, could I check it out?
MATT: Go ahead and make an arcana check for me.
TRAVIS: I have advantage, it says.
LAURA: On arcana checks? That's great.
TRAVIS: Yes, it says: Hunter's Bane, "Your ability to recall lore about spells, magic items, eldritch symbols, magic traditions, planes of existence and the inhabitants of those planes."
MATT: That is the description of arcana as a skill. You have advantage against arcana that plies into things that are fiendish, celestial, and creatures that--
LAURA: Oh, I thought your--
TRAVIS: 12.
MATT: Unless something else is giving you advantage.
TRAVIS: 16.
SAM: Oh!
MATT: 16. This is a relatively intricate device that has simple functions. Meaning it's an intricate build, but it's designed so that the user of it doesn't need to have a deeply intricate understanding. You're not quite sure how it functions. You've seen it function at a distance. So you know what it's supposed to do. You figure with enough, (sigh) you think it could be altered with some precision to fire directionally, yes. But it would require an arcana check of whoever is operating it to do so successfully.
MARISHA: Fireball.
SAM: The paladin might know some arcana.
TRAVIS: Sure.
SAM: We don't need to aim it at anything specific. We just need to start shooting it anywhere.
TRAVIS: I will start sliding this way.
MATT: The figure steps around here.
TRAVIS: Stealthily.
LAURA: He's coming, he's coming.
MARISHA: My Fireball can go 150.
MATT: You shift over this way.
TRAVIS: Actually, I'll keep coming and I'll--
MARISHA: Just do a real big boom?
TRAVIS: I'll put myself, yeah, behind that shed.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: -- that can explode?
TRAVIS: Near the wagon wheel.
MARISHA: We can shoot--
MATT: Stops here and glances around.
MARISHA: Fire really far.
SAM: In my inventory, for some reason--
LIAM: I wondering if we can make something explosive?
LAURA: I can Catapult.
SAM: I have two bombs.
MATT: You can move him over there for me, if you don't mind.
SAM: I don't know when or where I made these.
LAURA: Give them to me, I'll Catapult them.
LIAM: Make them--
ASHLEY: Yes.
LIAM: But make one invisible.
SAM and LAURA: I can't do that.
TRAVIS: Can I roll a stealth check?
LIAM: You can't make a thing invisible?
MARISHA: But our range is far enough that even if we--
TRAVIS: 24.
MATT: 24. Okay.
MARISHA: Then we bolt. We'll be away from where it was fired.
SAM: When did I get these fucking bombs?
LAURA: You had them since the race.
SAM: We made them.
MATT: Begins to slowly maneuver back.
TALIESIN: You were really into it.
LAURA: If you give me a bomb, I can Catapult it over.
ASHLEY: I could do Flame Sphere. It would appear.
SAM: Take both my bombs.
ASHLEY: It would've be like (swoosh) 60 feet.
SAM: Hey, Chetney.
TRAVIS: Hmm?
SAM: What's going on?
TRAVIS: It seems like if someone that had arcane leanings rolled high enough in their minds, they could aim this magoogle and shoot it.
SAM: Okay.
TALIESIN: What about the lightning rod?
LAURA: I have no arcana.
MATT: You think you could. You rolled enough to the point where you can baseline probably make it work. But if anyone else wants to use it, they have to make their own roll.
LIAM: I worry if we set things off in that corner or the corner that we're in, everyone's going to go (swoosh).
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: Then we go around this way
MARISHA: Then we run. Because all three of us can combine the bomb and fire. We shoot it from this way and then immediately bolt away from where we shot it and then hopefully it's enough to distract them towards where it hit.
LIAM: That, I'm cool with. I'm saying setting off any of the devices of theirs--
LAURA: Sure.
LIAM: -- in that corner--
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: -- is going to draw their attention in a way we don't want.
MARISHA: Well, then why don't we try this? Then see what happens.
SAM: Doesn't matter.
LAURA: Then if it goes south, then Chet can use it at that Reiloran and we run for the gate.
MARISHA: Yeah.
SAM: Okay.
MARISHA: How far is your Telekinesis?
SAM: We're going to launch a bomb? Is that what we're doing?
LAURA: I got two bombs. I can dual spell these, Catapult, and send them both over.
MARISHA: How far can you go?
LAURA: I can do, I can Catapult them 90 feet in any direction I choose.
TRAVIS: (whistles)
MARISHA: So we can both make that distance if we want to soup that up, literally as it lands and then we hit it with fire at the same time and make it massive.
LAURA: All right.
LIAM: Yeah.
MARISHA: Let's try it.
LIAM: Go in two directions so that it'll cause more disarray.
LAURA: I don't know how far 90 feet is.
TALIESIN: Chaos, chaos, chaos.
SAM: Wait, no, two directions? I feel like it should all be one direction.
MARISHA: One big direction?
LIAM: It's probably about this.
TALIESIN: If it's two directions, it will be coming directly from us.
LAURA: Somewhere over here.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
LAURA: Send it over this way.
TALIESIN: If the bomb came from there, you run that way, yeah.
LAURA: Okay, the crawler's going away, that's okay.
SAM: Maybe try to blow up one of those guys.
LAURA: Maybe send it directly in between these two.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
SAM: Or just pick one.
MARISHA: Like here?
LAURA: Right here?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
LAURA: Is that 90 feet? That's way more than 90 feet, y'all.
SAM: We can get closer.
TALIESIN: We'll get to the point where it's reasonable.
ASHLEY: Yeah, we can...
MARISHA: Well, can you show us how far 90?
TALIESIN: 90 feet means we can--
LIAM: We got to guesstimate.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah, I don't think he's going to show it to us.
TALIESIN: Ish.
MATT: I'll put it this way, this length is 85 feet.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: Okay.
LIAM: All right.
MARISHA: So let's scooch up maybe a little bit.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Stealth our way over.
LAURA: Can we stealth our way over to where we're at the edge of the map?
MATT: You certainly can. Everyone can make a stealth check.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TRAVIS: No.
MARISHA: It's all right. We still have--
MATT: Pass Without a Trace?
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: Okay. Your paladin friend rolled a natural one, but--
LIAM: Does he have transparent pieces?
LAURA: Who did?
MARISHA: We trip the paladin.
TALIESIN and TRAVIS: Ishto.
MATT: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Ishto.
MATT: Ishto, who has disadvantage on stealth rolls because he has heavy armor on.
LAURA: Oh, right. Maybe we have him stay back. (laughs)
MARISHA: But he should benefit by-- it's one, okay.
MATT: Yeah, all right, so?
LIAM: Call out your stealth.
MARISHA: 24.
MATT: 24.
SAM: 21.
MATT: 21.
ASHLEY: 23.
TALIESIN: Okay.
MATT: All right.
LAURA: 27 for me, 20 for the Reiloran.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: 31.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: 29.
MATT: Whew, by the skin of your teeth.
TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah.
MATT: You begin to sift through the ruins. Who's leading the charge on this, on the pathway?
MARISHA: The path?
LAURA: Can we follow the path that Chet--
MARISHA: Chet laid out?
LAURA: -- took?
MATT: Sure. Best you can, he went stealthy in there to the point where a lot of you didn't even see where he went.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: That's the interesting thing about letting somebody go off in stealth. So who is leading, following the path?
LIAM: Then I'm going to go in the front and with my eyes on the ground with someone else looking to where we're going, I'm looking for anything amiss on the ground.
MATT: Okay, I would like you to make a perception check as you lead the charge.
LIAM: That is a 24.
MATT: 24, okay. Moving along the path, you get most of the way to where Chetney had set up and as you turn one corner, you touch the edge of one of the ruins and it begins to (hum) glow quickly and you watch those same ribbons (slice) shriek out towards you. I need you to make a constitution saving throw for me.
LIAM: Constitution save? Okay. Okay, okay. That's bad, that's nine.
MARISHA: Oh.
MATT: That's a nine.
MARISHA: Do you have Halfling Luck or some shit?
LIAM: Not for that.
MARISHA: Fuck.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: Your con is low.
MATT: You are restrained. You feel your body suddenly, as the ribbons sink into you, your body begins to lock up and as you try and catch yourself, the rest of you watch as Orym's right arm stiffens.
TALIESIN: Guys, guys.
LAURA: Heal him.
SAM: It's going already? I will--
TRAVIS: Can I peek my head over the top of the wagon, too--
SAM: -- cast Greater Restoration.
TRAVIS: -- and survey the ground and area from where I'm at? See if anything shows up on the See Invisibility?
SAM: Unless--
MATT: Okay, make a perception check.
SAM: He's turning into stone?
MATT: Yeah. The process has begun.
TRAVIS: 17.
MATT: It's a multi-level or multi-stage process.
LAURA: She's got to be on the attack.
SAM: I will cast Greater Restoration on him.
MATT: Okay, so you burn 100--
LIAM: Greater Resto.
MATT: -- worth of diamond dust.
SAM: Yes.
MATT: You reach over and touch Orym. As it does, you watch the ribbons (flutters) pulling away and a little bit of gathered dust on your elbows (whoosh) falls off as you regain your physicality.
LIAM: 24 was not high enough.
SAM: Whoa.
LAURA: Wow.
TRAVIS: 17 on the--
LAURA: No, you rolled nine. Oh, to see it.
LIAM: To spot it.
LAURA: Got it, got it.
MATT: Without See Invisibility, 25 was the DC. You just missed it.
LAURA: Wow.
TRAVIS: 17 on the perception check for See Invisibility.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Just from where I am.
MATT: From where you are.
SAM: It's tense, dude.
TALIESIN: Do you want me to? You tell me where to go, I'll step forward. My con's not as good as it used to be, but it works.
SAM: Are you bigger?
LIAM: Well, how far up did we? You're busy, Matt, but when you're done, I'm wondering how far we made it.
LAURA: Then move as soon as we do it.
MARISHA: And then run.
ASHLEY: We run for the gate.
MATT: Those are two right there that you see the glyphs floating in the space.
TRAVIS: You guys see the circles he put down?
MATT: Well, they don't see them.
SAM: No, we don't.
LIAM: No.
TRAVIS: No. Of course not.
LIAM: (coos)
LAURA: Okay. All right. Are we up close now, did we make it?
MATT: You've shifted up essentially to the outskirts of where this corner is.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: Oh, I see him, I see him, I see him. Perfectly obscured by walls.
ASHLEY: Witches be bitches.
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: Witches be bitches. All right.
TRAVIS: Can I telepathically say: Wherever your path takes you, don't go beyond the Key. Front of the key has wards on the ground.
SAM: Okay.
LAURA: All right.
MARISHA: Let's wait for this guy to path away, like that.
MATT: (heavy impact)
LAURA: Yeah, right?
LIAM: Sure. (laughs)
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: This guy walks and steps over this edge here.
LAURA: Should we do it?
ASHLEY: Yeah, let's do it.
TALIESIN: We know that we're clear for--
LAURA: All right, I'm going to take the two--
SAM: Give me the EMP just in case.
ASHLEY: Oh.
SAM: In the bag of holding.
LAURA: I'm going to take the two bombs that FCG gave and do they need to be set off, or?
SAM: I think so.
MARISHA: The fire.
LAURA: The fire will set them off?
SAM: I would assume so.
LAURA: All right, I'm going, I hope y'all--
ASHLEY: Isn't there a way to, hang on.
SAM: I'm sure there's a fuse.
LAURA: There's a trigger. There is. There's a trigger.
ASHLEY: There's something-- how to do it.
SAM: We made these a year ago.
LAURA: Yeah. But we knew how to do it. It was like turn the blue or whatever.
SAM: Maybe.
LIAM: That's Imogen's Reiloran, right?
LAURA: You're a robot, you would remember how to do it.
MATT: Right here? Yes.
SAM: Searching database. (hums)
LIAM: Bleep blop bloop blurp.
LAURA: Bleep blop bloop, oh, hit the blue button.
SAM: Pi is 3.14.
LAURA: All right, so I wonder what the timer was. Does anybody have it in the notes?
SAM: I just wrote down "Bombs, 3d6." They're not even big bombs.
LIAM: We're not going for damage, right? We're going for--
ASHLEY: If I can find my notes.
LIAM: A distraction.
MARISHA: Distraction.
LAURA: I'm going to Twin Spell Catapult and cast it on both of these bombs in my hand.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: Fearne and I--
LIAM: This is Vex and this is Vax.
MARISHA: -- are going to time, I'm going to time a Fireball.
LAURA: This is Fluffer, this is Nutter.
ASHLEY: Scorching Ray.
MARISHA: We're going to--
LAURA: I'm going to--
MARISHA: -- hit this all at once.
LAURA: -- catapult them out to land in this area.
MATT: Okay, the range on Catapult is?
LAURA: 90 feet.
MATT: 90 feet.
MARISHA: Right as they arc, nuclear bomb style before they hit the ground, we're going to hit our fire spells.
MATT: Okay, so you Catapult them upward (swoosh) and they arc over this way.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: You're both--
ASHLEY: Scorching Ray goes 120, so I want to start it at 90 and then just you know, keep it going in a line.
MATT: The structure that's helping keep you--
ASHLEY: Hidden.
MATT: -- hidden does block your sight line of what she's throwing once it passes a certain point. So in order to keep watch of how its arc hits the ground and hit it on that time, you're going to have to move out this way, which might put you in the line of sight of some of the people that are keeping watch.
SAM: Got to do it.
MARISHA: Let's do it.
TRAVIS: Can I relay that from where I am? That sight line?
MATT: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: I'm over here.
MARISHA: Can he call out where it is?
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: For us?
TRAVIS: If y'all are calling out what your plan is.
MARISHA: Sure.
LAURA and ASHLEY: Yeah.
LAURA: All right, I Catapult it.
LIAM: Five degrees to the right.
MATT: (whoosh) You launch--
TALIESIN: Oh boy.
MATT: -- both of these explosives (swoosh) arcing up into the air and as they both begin to descend, you are both stepping out here to keep a sight line on it.
MARISHA: If Chetney can help us, like he said--
MATT: Or are you doing it this way first?
MARISHA: When he says now--
MATT: Which way do you want to do it, with Laudna or other way?
LIAM: How about towards where we're going?
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: I think that way, maybe.
LAURA: Laudna comes by.
ASHLEY: I'll go the other way then.
LAURA: Yeah, right there.
MATT: Over here? Or do you want both of you to go?
LAURA: Where she is.
MARISHA: I'll go with Fearne. I'll stick with Fearne.
MATT: Okay. So both of you just step out of the way.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Okay. The distant figure over there, who is up on top of the Ruin-Crawler, is looking up and takes notice of the strange things that are arcing in the air as they (swoosh) come down. You let loose your singular, slight magical bead of (sizzling) flaming energy that arcs out. You go ahead and roll. This isn't a super high DC, necessarily, but roll an attack roll for your Flaming, or sorry, for your Scorching Rays.
ASHLEY: Okay, one of them does not hit.
MATT: Looking for 15 on this. It's not a high DC, but you're trying to catch it as it comes down.
ASHLEY: So one of them hit. The second one hits as well.
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: So two hit.
MATT: So as it begins to arc down, (thuds, flames whoosh). You don't even have to roll for damage on these because both of them are obliterated. But what happens is as they begin to arc, you watch as it catches fire in the last 10, 15 feet of their descent as it impacts (boom) there's a spilling of rolling flame that seems to curl in and a brief moment of (sucking, explosion) an outer explosion that rocks and actually ends up knocking this off-kilter. This guy gets blown prone. This Ruin-Crawler gets knocked backward slightly and (clomps) has to right itself. Both of these Warders immediately spin and turn, as do all the rest of the figures looking in this direction and they all begin to immediately rush over towards this way, heading in that direction. What are you all doing?
LAURA: We head for the gate.
LIAM: What's the floating Reiloran doing?
MATT: It's just floating there, looking.
LIAM: Looking down in front of the Key? Okay. Yeah. Let's move up to the back of that building.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Full speed.
LAURA: As we start running.
SAM: I'm going to tell Chetney mentally: Maybe throw some more distract-y things over there or some sounds or something to make it seem like the attack is coming from your direction.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MARISHA: You said we want to try and scale the back of this hut?
LAURA: Yeah, we're going to try to go up.
LIAM: Skip that guard, go up the back of the building,
LAURA: Run around and--
LIAM: Yeah.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: So you're going into a full run now?
LIAM: I think we should.
LAURA: We're moving, yeah.
LIAM: I think we should sprint. Because we just bought ourselves a moment of "Huh?"
LAURA: If I get within 60 feet of that floating guy, I want to double distance a spell and try to blind him.
MATT: Try to blind them?
ASHLEY: Yes!
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: That's a-- Yeah. Can we Guidance that or no?
LAURA: Mm-mm, it's a spell.
MATT: No.
TALIESIN: Yeah, no.
MATT: All right.
TALIESIN: It's been so long.
MATT: So you're going to try and blind him?
LAURA: Mm-hmm.
MATT: That is a constitution save?
LAURA: Yes, it is.
MATT: All righty. That is going to be a 19.
LAURA: He saves.
MATT: So, unfortunately you go and try and release the spell as the rest of you are rushing around this direction to follow suit. The Reiloran also?
MARISHA: We're going this way.
MATT: Right. You're all coming up to this path?
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah, I tell the Reiloran: If anything comes near us, protect us.
MATT: Drifts up to that point. As the spell glistens off of the mind and is lost, the floating Thought Eater-- (shifting whoosh)
ASHLEY: Thought Eater?
MATT: -- drifts and looks in your direction, and immediately you watch as the surrounding floating robes around it (fabric whips furiously) seem to whip with fury.
TRAVIS: You better go get him.
MATT: Now we're in initiative.
SAM: Oh boy.
TALIESIN: Yeah, we are.
LAURA: Sorry.
TALIESIN: Yep.
SAM: No, it was great.
LIAM: It's okay.
TALIESIN: It was a good call.
LAURA: He was going to see us anyway.
TRAVIS: He's yours now.
LIAM: Everybody else is--
TRAVIS: That's your dude.
LIAM: Everyone else is in a bad place to get to us once we start climbing.
TRAVIS: Got to get vertical.
MARISHA: I think we should still try to keep moving up, though.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
LIAM: Yes.
LAURA: We should definitely--
TALIESIN: No stopping.
LIAM: We're fighting up the building up the stairs.
LAURA: -- run it.
LIAM: We say our heads.
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: ♪ (hums battle music) ♪
LIAM: All right.
SAM: Oh boy.
MATT: All righty. So 25 to 20?
LIAM: 23.
TRAVIS: 22.
LAURA: 22.
SAM: 20.
LIAM: Woo!
TALIESIN: Whoa!
MATT: Look at y'all. All righty.
TRAVIS: What's your dex?
LAURA: I rolled a nat 20, though.
TRAVIS: I did, too.
SAM: So did I.
LAURA: Oh shit!
SAM: So did I.
MARISHA: Oh shit!
LAURA: Three nat 20s on initiative?!
MARISHA: Oh shit!
MATT: Dang!
LIAM: Letters, how are you getting up?
LAURA: You're way more dextrous than me.
TRAVIS: My dex is only plus two.
SAM: What?
LIAM: How are you getting up?
SAM: Walking up the stairs.
LAURA: Oh, mine's plus three.
SAM: Hopping.
LAURA: No. Plus two as well.
LAURA and TRAVIS: Rollies!
MATT and MARISHA: Rollies!
LIAM: I'm trying to get up the back of the--
TRAVIS: 11.
LAURA: Eight.
SAM: Back of the roof?
MATT: Okay, so Orym, Chet.
LIAM: Somebody get you up.
SAM: I don't have my--
MATT: Imogen.
SAM: I can Misty Step 30 feet.
MATT: FCG.
LAURA: FCG.
LIAM: There you go.
MATT: Okay. 20 to 15?
MARISHA: 17.
TALIESIN: Orym, Chet, Laudna, FCG. Oh, no, no, no.
MARISHA: No, FCG, Laudna.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: Yep.
SAM: I don't have my grapple cannon anymore.
LAURA: And what did you roll, Ashton?
TALIESIN: 14.
MATT: 14.
LAURA: Ashton and then Fearne rolled a five.
MATT: All right, gotcha.
TALIESIN: Whoa. Really?
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Wow.
TRAVIS: Orym, Chet, Imogen, FCG, Laudna, Ashton, Fearne.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: All righty.
MARISHA: Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit.
MATT: All right. Orym, you're up first.
LIAM: Okay, I want to use my action and movement to run, use my flea boots to leap onto the roof and get as far as I can up the steps.
MATT: I'll say you get there on your movement and leap.
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: So you are on the edge here.
LIAM: I'll use my action to keep going.
MATT: Okay, with that you go 30 feet, right?
LIAM: Yeah.
MATT: That gets you right there.
LIAM: Now, this is unlikely to trigger, but can I hold my bonus action of baiting and switching if one of the casters, if one of the witches gets adjacent to me?
MATT: You can hold an action, you can't hold a bonus action.
LIAM: Okay, got it. All right. Then I'm done.
MATT: Unfortunately.
MATT: All right. Finishing Orym's go. Chetney, you're up, with Imogen on deck.
TRAVIS: I'm going to hop up on top of this cart and I'm going to run up on the roof and jump down behind the big automaton.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Oh, probably got to make a roll for that.
MATT: Make an athletics check for me, because it is a rather steep--
LIAM: Big automaton.
TRAVIS: Yes, it is. 24.
MATT: Easy enough to do. You get up to the edge there.
TRAVIS: Can I jump down behind the big automaton?
MATT: You can. You want to leap onto the ground?
TRAVIS: Yes, please.
MATT: All right. Make an acrobatics check to not lose any movement on the landing.
TRAVIS: (wavering) Oh boy. Nine.
MATT: Nine. You do take two points of bludgeoning damage as your ankle rolls a little bit, but you catch yourself.
MARISHA: Ouch.
TRAVIS: Can I use my bonus action to-- Mm. That motherfucker doesn't have any blood. I don't think that works.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: Fucking constructs.
TRAVIS: Yeah, that's cool. I'll just stay there.
MARISHA: (laughs) Oh.
TRAVIS: That's my turn. Actually, yeah, with my bonus action, I'll take out Turmoil and utter the secret word and extend it into a scythe.
MATT: (blade slices out) You got it.
TRAVIS: I will, I haven't used my action yet, so I will use-- Have we attacked floating brain sucker?
TALIESIN: Just a spell that missed.
LAURA: Yeah, that missed.
MARISHA: Just the Blindness.
TRAVIS: That missed. 60 feet. I'm not even close enough for that. That's good. I'll send a Shatter spell at this guy at the bottom of the stairs.
MATT: You got it. Okay. That's a constitution saving throw for him.
TRAVIS: Yes, it is.
MATT: That is going to be a 15. What's the DC?
TRAVIS: Thank you. Yeah, that makes it-- It's 14 on the con save.
MATT: So half damage.
TRAVIS: Beautiful. Woo, 24, so 12 points of damage.
MATT: 12 points of damage to him. (explosion) You watch as the explosion blasts out. It actually destroys--
LIAM: Ooh.
MATT: -- these parts of these steps, shattering them apart.
LAURA: Well.
LIAM: That's good, that's good.
MATT: Which drops one means of climbing.
MARISHA: That's great.
TRAVIS: How is that great? That fucks us a little bit, right?
SAM: No, we're going up the back way anyway.
LIAM: You're really spry, Chet.
SAM: It fucks you. But you'll be okay, right?
LIAM: No, he's a superhuman.
TRAVIS: This is a one-way trip.
LAURA: No, Chet.
MATT: (laughs)
LIAM: Play the Enya.
TRAVIS: (shrieks)
LAURA: ♪ Who can say ♪ ♪ Where the road goes ♪
TRAVIS: I can't sing that with my-- That's my turn.
MATT: All righty. Finishing Chetney's go. Imogen, you're up, with FCG on deck.
LAURA and MARISHA: ♪ Only time ♪
SAM: Did paladin man role for initiative?
MATT: Yes, he did, for initiative.
MATT: Okay. Can you tell us where he is in the initiative?
MATT: You don't know.
SAM: Okay.
LAURA: All right. I am going to-- I'm going to look at the Reiloran with me and say: Attack at the same time. In his brain, I'm going to say that and then I'm going to Psychic Lance--
MARISHA: Come on.
LAURA: -- the Thought Eater.
LIAM: (finger snapping)
LAURA: I want the Reiloran to Psychic Lance him at the same time.
LIAM: Oh! Eat these thoughts!
MATT: Okay, all right. So it's two intelligence saves?
LAURA: Yes.
MATT: All righty.
LIAM: Here's a thought: Fuck and You.
MATT: That is a 20 and he can reroll that. There, that'll be a 19.
LAURA: Okay, so he saves both of them.
MARISHA: Gross.
LAURA: On a failed save.
LIAM: Did you say gross?
MARISHA: Yeah, that he saves.
LAURA: On a successful save, half as much damage. Okay, so he's not incapacitated, but he takes half of--
MATT: He takes half damage of each, okay.
LAURA: Okay, so 7d6 divided by--
ASHLEY: Okay.
LIAM: Skadoosh.
ASHLEY: That's pretty good.
LAURA: 11. 15.
TALIESIN: Hmm.
LAURA: 18.
TALIESIN: Hmm.
ASHLEY: This, this, this?
LAURA: 21, these ones didn't roll. What did I just say? Sorry.
MATT: 21.
LAURA: 11, sorry. 21, 27, 28 divided by two.
MATT: Halved?
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Okay, so 14 damage. Got it.
LAURA: That's from mine and then sorry, I didn't look at my Reiloran.
MATT: Right.
LIAM: It's like 1,000, right?
LAURA: Yeah, it's definitely like 1,000.
ASHLEY: Howdy doody do 'dis? (laughter)
LAURA: Spell-- So a ranged spell attack hit, oh, so the second one, sorry, he's not Psychic Lancing him. He was just trying to hit him. So he rolls--
MATT: Okay, got it.
LAURA: An attack. Okay.
MATT: Go for it. Roll an attack for me.
LAURA: What does he add? I'm so sorry. Hit.
TALIESIN: This is weird baby-- Baby, uh--
LAURA: Oh, my spell attack modifier to hit.
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Got it, got it, got it. So that is a 22.
MATT: 22 hits, roll damage for him.
LAURA: Sorry about that. Six plus--
MATT: These are both psychic damage?
LAURA: Yes, it is.
MATT: Gotcha.
LAURA: I know, six plus, so that's-- That's 13 points of psychic damage from him.
MATT: Got it, so--
LAURA: Her.
MATT: Right. (crashing) You see it react to the impact, but it shrugs it off.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: Angrily puts its arms out, brings one leg up as it's about to retort.
LAURA: Oh, he's going to do a crane kick?
MATT: Kind of, yeah. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Sweep the leg.
MATT: Wants to sweep the leg. All righty, so.
LIAM: Ding, ding, ding.
MATT: That's your action. Do you want to move?
LAURA: Yeah, I'm going to make a run.
MATT: Okay, so you're rushing up towards the back here.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: All righty. That finishes your go. FCG, you're up, with some stuff happening, and then Laudna.
MARISHA: Oh, with some stuff.
ASHLEY: With some stuff happening.
MARISHA: FCG.
LAURA: Is there anybody that is not a friendly, sorry. I just want to make sure I'm using all of my things to their full advantage.
SAM: I'm going to use my movement to get up to the bottom of the house there.
LIAM: This bro could be a problem.
SAM: Then I will bonus action Misty Step to the roof.
LIAM: (fast movement sound)
MARISHA: (fingers snapping)
LAURA: There's nobody.
SAM: Or to the stairs, if I can--
MATT: You can get to the very bottom of the stairs right there.
SAM: Amazing.
ASHLEY: Nice.
TALIESIN: Get a long range shot.
SAM: Now am I within 60 feet of floaty girl?
MATT: You look like you probably would be.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
SAM: Okay.
TALIESIN: We need some long range for this one.
SAM: Then I will use-- She's taken damage, too, right? I will use-- Oh, it's a wisdom save. She's probably very wise.
TRAVIS: One way to find out.
TALIESIN: Yes, but you know.
SAM: All right. I'll try Scramble the Dead.
MATT: (laughs) Sending out--
TRAVIS and MARISHA: Instead of Toll.
SAM: I will open up my mouth and you'll hear the AOL modem.
MATT, ASHLEY, and SAM: ♪ (dial up ringing) ♪
ASHLEY: Amazing.
MATT: 60 feet. Definitely within your radius.
LIAM: The Age of Arcanum was wild.
MATT: That's a wisdom save, right?
SAM: 15.
MATT: 15?
ASHLEY: Come on, roll low.
MATT: Actually failed with a 12. (cheering)
MATT: Rolled really low on that one.
SAM: Because she's taken damage, I believe it's 3d12 damage.
MATT: Indeed.
ASHLEY: Ooh.
LAURA: The Thought Eater up there?
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Yes!
MARISHA: The Thought Eater. ♪ Thought Eater ♪
SAM: 20 points of damage.
MATT: Nice.
TALIESIN: Wow!
MARISHA: That's a cantrip, right?
SAM: That's a cantrip.
MARISHA: That's good.
LAURA: That's one of the types of Reilorans I could've summoned, and I summoned mine.
MATT: Does that finish your turn?
SAM: That's it.
MATT: All right. Ending FCG's turn, it is now Ishto's go.
LAURA: Ishto.
LIAM: Oh yeah, save the day.
MATT: Going to rush along.
ASHLEY: Let's go, Ishto.
MATT: Following everybody else's business, is going to attempt to climb up.
LIAM: I have three broken ribs.
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: Ow.
LIAM: And my ankle is sprained. (laughter)
MATT: Gets up as a movement and a dash to climb up behind and gets onto the roof and is standing there above where you are and looking out to try and help anyone else who needs help getting up. Finishing his turn, it's now the Thought Eater's go. The Thought Eater, at the top of the round, puts the arms out and you watch as everyone in the vicinity (whooshes) turns over as they reach out and inform everyone of what's transpiring by the Key.
TALIESIN: Yep.
LIAM: Oh.
ASHLEY: Shit!
LAURA: Yeah, that makes sense.
LIAM: Yep.
TALIESIN: Yeah, no.
LAURA: Sorry, I tried.
LIAM: She just hit the company Slack.
LAURA: I was trying to incapacitate him before he could do it.
SAM: Chetney, the jig is up, get up here.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MARISHA: You know, we got pretty far.
LIAM: We're doing great, keep going.
LAURA: Just keep running. If you get hit, just keep running.
SAM: (laughs) If you die--
MARISHA: Just keep running.
SAM: Keep running. Oh shit.
ASHLEY: Whoever can get into the bridge, get into the bridge.
MATT: With that, it's going to attempt--
LIAM: Oh jeez.
MATT: Let's see.
TALIESIN: Also, we still have an EMP to throw.
LIAM: That Ishto guy looks like he deserves an attack.
MATT: It's going to attempt a Psychic Slam on you, Orym.
LIAM: Oh. What about Ishto? He's three times my size.
MATT: That is going to be a 20 to hit.
LIAM: That will hit, yeah.
MATT: That hits, okay. You take--
TALIESIN: He's going to throw you off the fucking-- Oh, I hear a lot of dice.
MATT: It's just me moving dice around.
TALIESIN: Okay.
MATT: (laughs)
SAM: To roll.
TALIESIN: That was freaking me out.
MATT: You take 14 points of psychic damage.
LIAM: Ow.
MATT: As you feel this blast of mental energy burn through you, like in a brief instant, every bad memory hits you in a second and with that, you feel yourself being pushed to the side and it pushes you 15 feet this way and you plummet. Make an acrobatics check to try and land on your feet.
LAURA: Monk shit. Dope monk shit.
MATT: I'll say a dexterity saving throw, actually.
LIAM: Dexterity saving throw? Should I use what I just rolled? Probably, yeah.
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM: Then it's a nine.
MATT: It's a nine. You fall and are knocked prone on the ground there. Is like (clatters) down the side, taking--
LIAM: More damage.
MATT: 11 points of bludgeoning damage from (clatters) crack.
SAM: He's a good climber, he can climb back up.
MARISHA: Yeah.
LIAM: It's true.
MATT: Is going to use--
ASHLEY: Do we still have temporary hit points?
SAM: It should be there.
MATT: It's going to use another Psychic Slam to try and sweep Ishto off the roof, too.
SAM: Ishto, no!
MARISHA: He's been through enough.
SAM: I wasted several spells on you.
MATT: 24 to hit.
TALIESIN: Oh boy.
LAURA: It wasn't just a temporary hit point.
MARISHA: He's too far away from me for me to--
MATT: Ishto takes--
MARISHA: -- Silvery Barbs.
MATT: Ishto takes 12 points of psychic damage, so is still at 12 hit points.
MARISHA: This bro is going to die.
MATT: And gets pushed 15 feet this way (swoosh) to be dropped on top of Orym. (laughter)
LIAM: Oh!
MARISHA: Oh no.
SAM: Ishto, help Orym back up! (laughter)
MATT: Ishto.
LIAM: This guy hasn't showered in weeks.
MATT: -- is going to try to make a dexterity save.
TRAVIS: If he goes out on top of you. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Ugh! You dead son of a bitch.
MARISHA: You roll his dead body off.
LIAM: You see Seedling go (whoosh, thud).
MATT: Lands, wham!
MARISHA: Oh no.
MATT: Right on top of you, full armor and all, crack.
LAURA: You can't make a dex saving throw?
LIAM: I'm so little.
MATT: I will allow a dex save to try and roll out of the way.
LAURA: Because that's what happened when I slammed somebody.
LIAM: Nope, it's nine.
LAURA: Oh no!
LIAM: Get crunched.
MATT: Crack.
LAURA: Orym!
MATT: That's another 11 points of bludgeoning damage. Ishto's at one hit point.
LIAM: This is not going how I thought it would.
MARISHA: Ishto is at one point?
MATT: He's like (crack) "(groans)"
LAURA and LIAM: Oh, Ishto.
MATT: He rolls off of you and is like, "Do not worry. The Lawbearer looks upon us this day."
LAURA: Jeez louise.
LIAM: He hears (muffled moan). (laughter)
MATT: "She will protect us." (laughter)
TALIESIN: Oh boy.
LIAM: Am I pinned, am I grappled by this man's torso?
MATT: No, you're just both prone.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: And is going to drift 30 feet.
SAM: Like "Tokyo Drift?"
MATT: Yeah.
LAURA: (whooshes)
MATT: "I'm fast and furious!" All right, is going to (swoosh) coast over on the opposite side to get a better view of everything that's around. Finishing their go, Laudna, you're up, with Ashton on deck.
MARISHA: All right, I'm not going to fuck around with shit. So I'm going to Spider Climb and bolt up that wall.
LAURA: Laudy daudy da!
ASHLEY and MARISHA: ♪ Laudy daudy da ♪
MATT: No rolls, you're just--
SAM: ♪ It's the motherfuckin' ♪
MATT: -- up on top in 30 feet.
ASHLEY: ♪ It's the motherfuckin' scary Laudna, mother ♪ (laughter)
LAURA: ♪ Laudy daudy da ♪ (laughter)
MARISHA: Gosh.
LIAM: Now it's high fantasy.
MARISHA: I wish I had--
SAM: High fantasy. (laughter)
MARISHA: I wish I had some--
LIAM: It was implied, but okay.
MARISHA: -- better shit to neutralize her.
MATT: ♪ Smoke Toby every day ♪ (laughter)
MARISHA: Okay, I'm going to try and Eldritch Blast her.
MATT: Eldritch Blast?
MARISHA: Do I have advantage for any reason on this?
MATT: No.
MARISHA: Because the last time I did and I fucked shit up. No?
MATT: Not at the moment, no.
MARISHA: Okay. Okay. Three attacks.
TRAVIS: Wait.
MARISHA: What? Oh, those are bad. Those are all bad.
LAURA: No, Laudna.
SAM: Well, that one's micrococked right there.
MARISHA: Does this count as micrococked?
MATT: No.
SAM and LAURA: (laugh)
MARISHA: Okay. Well, 17.
TRAVIS: Does this count as micrococked?
MATT: 17 hits.
MARISHA: 17 hits.
LAURA: Okay.
MARISHA: Oh. Oh, well, then maybe I'm okay. 17 hits. 25?
MATT: Hits.
MARISHA: And 13.
MATT: 13 misses.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: So two hits.
MARISHA: Two hits. That's not bad, that's not bad, that's not bad.
SAM, MARISHA, and LAURA: (squeal)
LIAM: Oh, jeez. It's still a thing, you guys.
MARISHA: Okay. 13 for one and then eight for another.
MATT: Okay, so 21 total damage. (impacts) Both hit and you watch as it's impacting. It's like it's putting up these psychic shields to try and deflect it, but each impact still breaks through and slams into it, leaving these dark necrotic burn marks across the shoulders.
LAURA: Jeez, I need those. I want psychic shields.
MATT: All righty. Does that finish your turn, Laudna? That's your move and your action.
MARISHA: Yeah, that's it.
MATT: Finishing your go, that brings us to Ashton.
TALIESIN: You going to be okay?
ASHLEY: Yeah, I think so.
TALIESIN: All right.
ASHLEY: Oh, we'll see.
TALIESIN: I am raging. Oh, this is fun. The red-blue shift starts to hit. We've got Time.
MARISHA: We don't!
TALIESIN: It's going to be great.
MATT: "We don't."
TALIESIN: We really don't. How far am I from the top of the tower?
MATT: From the top of the tower? Somewhere between 80 to 100 feet to climb to the actual base of the Bloody Bridge.
TALIESIN: Okay, I can hold that for a little later then. I'm going to head up towards the tower then.
MATT: Okay, make an athletics check for me as you climb the side.
TALIESIN: All right. That's 20.
MATT: 20? Yeah, without issue, you can join--
TALIESIN: I'm 40 feet of movement.
LIAM: Oh god. We lost half the party.
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm 40 feet of movement and--
MATT: Yeah, 40 feet of movement gets you just past FCG, actually.
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: I'll say about there.
TALIESIN: Then for my action, I'm going to hold my action. My hold action is to activate the switch on my hammer if I feel like I'm about to be pushed off the-- Or is that too weird?
MATT: No, you can totally do that.
TALIESIN: Yeah, so I'm ready to brace myself.
MATT: You activate the hammer.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: You got it. Okay, finishing your go, these juggernauts activate. This one's going to double dash leap.
TALIESIN: Oh. So there's this thing between us. Okay.
MATT: That's going to be--
LAURA: Keep going. We got to go, y'all.
MATT: It's up there and then slows it down a bit. It gets to about there with its two movements and that's going to finish its go. This one here is going to attempt to King Kong climb the side of the Key.
TRAVIS: Oh, is that one going to be--
MATT: Yeah, that's 18 athletics.
LIAM: (snarls) Dang.
MATT: It's going to take pretty much all of its turn to do so, but it gets up and sits at the very top.
SAM: Oh boy!
TALIESIN: Cool, bro.
MATT: Guarding it up there. (exclaiming)
SAM: (laughs)
MARISHA: You've got to be fucking me.
LAURA: No!
TRAVIS: Ashton, let's go.
MARISHA: Goddamn it.
TALIESIN: Oh, this shit going to be fun.
MATT: This Warder is going to also go ahead and close the distance here.
TRAVIS: "American Gladiators."
LIAM: That's a tall drink of water.
LAURA: Oh.
MATT: We'll say it steps past this piece here.
LAURA: Yeah, why not?
MATT: Is going to reach down and grab the edges of this structure with both of its hands.
LAURA: Oh no.
MATT: And rip it out of its moorings.
LAURA: Oh no.
SAM: (laughs) Oh shit.
MATT: So that's going to be a strength check. Rolls a fucking four. It grabs it and you feel it moving, but it's like (scraping and crunching).
LAURA: Good thing you have Spider Climb and you're--
MATT: You have Spider Climb on, you're weaving with it, but you get the sense that this thing is starting to lose its mooring in the ground and this Warder's about to rip it out and essentially leave a gap to where that is. This one here--
LAURA: Oh my god.
MATT: Is going to turn around.
LIAM: Oh shizzle.
TALIESIN: Be cool, be cool.
MATT: To the wolf that just leapt to the ground behind it.
LAURA: You're up next, after.
SAM: We got paladin, guys. We'll be fine.
TALIESIN: We also want to move, so, yeah, make sure that you get closer to the--
MATT: It's going to make two slam attacks on you.
TALIESIN: We got to hit that gate hard.
MATT: Natural one.
ASHLEY: Nice.
TALIESIN: Yeah!
MATT: It goes (whooshing), one big, heavy battering ram swing that you duck out of the way and it slams into the building behind it and has to dislodge its fist backward as a back fist that comes through for a second strike. That's going to be a 21 to hit.
TRAVIS: Yes, sir.
MATT: All right. That one hits you for--
LAURA: Is that this guy over here who's doing it?
MATT: -- 19 points of bludgeoning damage and I need you to make a strength save.
TRAVIS: Cool. That 19 is halved to nine?
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: ♪ Strength save ♪ ♪ Which I have advantage on ♪ Oh!
MARISHA: Oh!
TRAVIS: I rolled 11s.
MATT: ♪ Skeedle dee bop boom ♪
TRAVIS: 18.
MATT: 18 is just the DC you needed.
TRAVIS: Ooh.
MATT: It tries to punch you into the ground, and as the backhand hits you, you catch yourself from almost being knocked onto the floor and hold your stance. You're not knocked prone.
TRAVIS: Good lord.
MATT: All right, that finishes their go. Fearne, you're up.
ASHLEY: Okay. All right, so where am I? I don't know where I am.
MATT: You are right over here behind this side. Sorry.
ASHLEY: All right, so--
MATT: The approach led to this back point here.
ASHLEY: Sure. I'm going to try to get to the stairs, somehow, someway.
MATT: Up here? You try and climb here? Make an athletics check.
ASHLEY: I could do a Mirthful Leap maybe, up to the top of the roof.
MATT: That's true, yeah. I'll allow that.
MATT: All right.
TALIESIN: ♪ Mirthful Leap ♪
ASHLEY: Mirthful leap. Yay!
MATT: You leap up onto the top of this precarious structure that the Warder is currently trying to dislodge from the ground.
ASHLEY: Am I able to make it up to the staircase? Or probably just from there.
MATT: With the rest of your movement? I'd say you could probably do that, yeah.
ASHLEY: All right.
MATT: Why not? I'll allow it.
ASHLEY: All right.
MATT: You can get up to there.
ASHLEY: I'm just going to hold on there. Hey--
SAM: Oh my god, these stairs.
MATT: I know.
TALIESIN: I love them.
MATT: Precarious as fuck.
ASHLEY: This is stupid that we're all on these stairs, but whatever.
TALIESIN: We got to get up there somehow.
ASHLEY: We got to get up there. All right, so the--
LAURA: If we would've flown in in a tent, we could've floated in a tent and then-- (laughter)
ASHLEY: Aimed it? (laughter)
LAURA: -- aimed it, so that we let go as we got to the gate and gone through.
ASHLEY: Yes.
LAURA: It would've been seamless.
ASHLEY: It would have been clutch.
LAURA: I'm just playing.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
SAM: Yeah--
TALIESIN: We could've--
ASHLEY: I'm still team tent.
SAM: Oh, they put a tent up there? Well, that's a great idea.
ASHLEY: I'm still team tent. Okay. And then from there, the juggernaut that is now blocking our path--
TALIESIN: I want to sail in on a Yurt.
ASHLEY: I'm going to Polymorph him.
MARISHA: That's what I'm hoping.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Ooh.
MATT: Polymorph him into what?
ASHLEY: A possum.
TRAVIS: Why isn't he going up. He's just hanging out on that spot.
MATT: That's a wisdom save?
ASHLEY: Yes.
MARISHA: Well, I think he's trying to keep us from going up.
MATT: That is going to be a 10.
LAURA: (gasps)
ASHLEY: Yes!
MARISHA: We got to get up past the stairs, for sure.
ASHLEY: Okay. All right.
LAURA: Great!
TALIESIN: Is that the flying one or the--
LAURA: No, that's the juggernaut.
LAURA: No, the juggernaut.
TALIESIN: Oh wow!
MATT: The juggernaut that leapt onto the top is like--
ASHLEY: I was thinking of doing the flying one, but--
MATT: (pounding and roaring) (tiny possum squeaks)
MARISHA: Yes!
SAM: Oh, yes!
MARISHA: Yes, Fearnie Fearne!
MATT: Becomes a tiny possum, which I'm going to use this little squirrel figure to represent.
SAM: That's clutch.
ASHLEY: Okay.
SAM: That's clutch.
LAURA: He's a baby possum.
MATT: Now this itty-bitty, little squirrel.
LIAM: Protect the possum.
LAURA: Cutie possum.
MARISHA: Yeah, don't hit the possum.
TALIESIN: Who's got the bag of holding?
LAURA: Fearne.
SAM: Right now, Fearne does.
ASHLEY: I do.
TALIESIN: We're going to put that possum in the bag of holding.
LIAM: Cute mini.
ASHLEY: All right, all right.
SAM: Possums can't--
LIAM: (rapping) All right, all right.
SAM: -- eat through wood, can they, like beavers?
SAM and LAURA: No.
ASHLEY: No.
LAURA: Ah!
MATT: I know.
LAURA: Oh god!
MATT: This has all gotten--
TALIESIN: I love it anyway.
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: That's clutch. Clutch, Johnson.
ASHLEY: All right, all right.
LAURA: It goes to show Matt didn't expect us to be idiots--
MARISHA: You have the EMP bomb.
SAM: I do.
LAURA: -- and all try to climb the ladder at the same time.
SAM: But which one do you throw it at?
MATT: I mean--
SAM: I guess the one that's closest, huh?
TALIESIN: Didn't he?
MATT: It also was-- It was partially affixed with elements of the other now destroyed stairs. So it just became very precarious in general. But that's okay. It'll work.
TALIESIN: Captain Precarious.
MATT: Indeed. I'll make it work. I'll make it work.
MARISHA: Captain Precarious.
MATT: Okay. So-- It's fine. (laughs) So, Fearne, that finishes your movement, your action. I think you're pretty much--
ASHLEY: As a bonus action, can I dash for Cunning Action? Just to try to get--
MATT: You can!
ASHLEY: -- all the way up the stairs and try to attach myself to the--
MARISHA: Yes. Yes, queen.
LIAM: ♪ (background music) ♪
SAM: Look at you, rogue-ing it up.
ASHLEY: At least just getting to the possum to put-- I probably can't put him in my bag in this turn, but--
MATT: No, no, you can do that next turn if you wanted to.
ASHLEY: All right. I'm going to start petting it.
MATT: As it is-- (laughter)
MATT: It looks very confused. You are within reach. Your next movement, you could enter the Bloody Bridge if you'd want to.
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: It's literally just stepping into it.
SAM: It's like a door?
MATT: You can sense as you step up to the top of it, especially you in the proximity of this, you can see that the smoke that now naturally drifts from your form, since you've taken in the Spark of Rau'shan, is mingling with this red energy, this element--
ASHLEY: (shudders)
MATT: -- of Ruidusborn power that sits within you. It's like feeling this weird drift, like the butterflies in your stomach and this pull that you feel like if you just gave a little leap, it would just pull you in.
ASHLEY: Just a little bit. If I just jump. Okay, and I'll stay here.
MATT: All right. So that finishes your turn.
MARISHA: (As Fearne) Just a little bit.
MATT: With that--
ASHLEY: Just a little bit. (engine roars and rattles)
LIAM: (groans)
MATT: -- this begins cruising over.
SAM: (engine sputtering comically)
MATT: This guy up here on the top--
LAURA: Shit.
MATT: -- of the Ruin-Crawler's going to start cranking up the top of its assault. (clanky engine rumbles) Begins barrelling from behind, as it begins arcing down towards where you are, Chetney.
MARISHA: Oh god!
MATT: That's going to be natural 20.
SAM: Ooh.
TRAVIS: Misses.
MATT: (laughs) Two plus, that's going to be an eight, I think?
SAM: Where's Chetney right now?
LAURA: He's down fighting this giant guy.
MATT: An 11.
SAM: ♪ Under the bridge downtown ♪
MATT: 17?
TRAVIS: Oh, misses.
MATT: All right, so only one hits you. It's a natural 20.
TRAVIS: Yeah. That's a hoo-hoo.
MATT: That's going to be 16 points of piercing damage.
TRAVIS: Oh, piercing?
MATT: Yeah.
MATT: (clanky clattering) So you only take eight.
TRAVIS: Great.
MARISHA: Oh, that's not bad.
MATT: As you're getting off the ground, getting literally punched and backhanded by this entity that's six times your size and taking it then getting blasted from behind and you just shrug it off.
TRAVIS: This sucks!
SAM: "Full Metal Jacket."
LIAM: They just allow it--
MATT: (laughs)
TALIESIN: I'm holding one because if they attack me, I'm still going to be able to move so fast so I can grab one more person.
TRAVIS: "Platoon."
SAM: Oh, that's "Platoon"?
ASHLEY: "Platoon," yeah.
TRAVIS: Or "Godfather."
LAURA: You can grab one person and get out.
SAM: Awesome.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: This guy over here has a heavy crossbow and he's going to aim it over at Fearne--
ASHLEY: I love "Full Metal Jacket."
MATT: -- since Fearne's at the very top.
MARISHA: Oh shit, Fearne.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: That's going to be a--
MARISHA: Oh, he got it!
TRAVIS: Oh he got it!
MATT: Oh god! (laughter)
ASHLEY: Wait, what happened?
MATT: That was perfect timing.
SAM: You died.
ASHLEY: No! I just got up here.
LIAM: Don't waste--
MATT: No, but Fearne, you do--
LIAM: -- firepower on anyone but the Thought Eater.
MATT: You do, that'll be--
TALIESIN: Orym and Chetney are probably not.
MATT: 15 to hit? What's your armor class?
ASHLEY: No, it doesn't hit.
MATT: No.
ASHLEY: No!
SAM: It doesn't tits.
MATT: It hits the side of the tower and streaks off.
ASHLEY: I try to get skinny.
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Up against the--
SAM: It doesn't tits.
ASHLEY: It doesn't tits.
LAURA: You're about to go--
MATT: This guy here--
LIAM: I can get close to Fearne.
MATT: -- is going to aim his ballista down from the skies.
SAM: Oh no!
TALIESIN: Hey, hey.
SAM: Oh no!
ASHLEY: Heads up!
SAM: Is he firing for us or the structure?
MATT: No, it's actually going to aim for you.
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm ready.
SAM: Oh, that's better.
MATT: You were the one that was there before. It's going to turn around.
MARISHA: It's into rock man.
SAM: Yeah.
MATT: (ballista blast) With a massive blast, it goes to-- That's going to be a 20 to hit.
LAURA: Well, it's just because you guys--
MATT: What's your armor class?
TALIESIN: Yes, that hits.
MATT: That hits. You take--
TALIESIN: I'll take it. Taking it.
MARISHA: You might get jettisoned off this.
TALIESIN: No, I'm not.
MARISHA: Oh, okay.
TRAVIS: He's got earth feet.
LAURA: He's got the--
MARISHA: Oh!
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: But he's standing on wood.
TRAVIS: Shut up, Marisha!
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: 28 points of piercing damage, halved because you're currently raging.
TALIESIN: 14.
MATT: I need you to make a strength saving throw.
SAM: Ooh.
TALIESIN: I've got a bar behind me.
MATT: That's what I'm saying. Strength saving throw to hold onto your hammer.
TALIESIN: Okay, and I get--
MATT: This isn't like an arrow. This is being hit with a medieval rail gun.
TALIESIN: I have advantage on strength saving throws.
MATT: Yes, you do.
TALIESIN: Okay, here we go.
TRAVIS: Come on, man.
TALIESIN: Don't be a dick. Natural 20.
LAURA: Woo!
ASHLEY: Yes!
SAM: Whoa!
MATT: So as you're holding the hammer waiting for this, you hear the rotation as you turn around. The rest of you watch. It goes by so fast. All you see is this slight jerk from Ashton and there's this hole on the side of his waist.
SAM: Oh!
MATT: You barely even shift from it. As you flex, you watch it close itself slightly.
SAM: Ooh.
TALIESIN: That all you fucking got? Woo!
MARISHA: Don't tempt him, Ashton.
LIAM: (laughs)
SAM: That was pretty cool, Ashton.
MATT: That guy over there is trying to get his functional, and it's wrecked. The explosion just destroyed it. It's sundered and you see him, he's like, "Ah, fuck it." He's getting real pissed off. This guy here is going to turn and he's going to make--
SAM: What guy is this?
MATT: Oh. Oh god.
LIAM: Oh! There was a little snap on that mini, I think.
MATT: That's okay. It's good, I'll fix it later.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: It takes one strike at each of you.
LAURA: We've got to get through. We can get through, right?
MATT: That's going to be a 22 to you, Orym.
LIAM: That hits.
SAM: I guess.
MATT: That's going to be a 15, which misses Ishto. Ishto is hanging in! Because it makes two big strikes with his glaive, and the first one, Ishto pulls out of the way and knocks it off. The other one comes down right onto your shoulder and arm.
TRAVIS: The Lawbearer favors me.
MARISHA: Where are you? You got hit off?
MATT: You take--
SAM: No, I'm over by the--
MATT: -- four points of slashing damage.
TRAVIS: Nice.
MATT: It just barely glances off of you. That finishes everyone here's go. Top of the round. Orym, you're up.
LIAM: All right, I'm going to roll away from Ishto, for flavor, stay in my spot, and flea jump leap to the bottom of the shack.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: So it's 15 feet to get up.
TRAVIS: ♪ Love shack ♪
MATT: 15 feet to get up.
LIAM: Then I don't know what you want to call the remaining 15 feet with the jump on the roof.
MATT: Jump on the roof.
LIAM: As far as I go.
MATT: I'll say make an athletics check on this one. This is going to be a-- (grunts).
ASHLEY: Great idea. Yeah.
LIAM: That's good. That's 20.
ASHLEY: Might as well.
MATT: 20? 20 will get you up there.
LIAM: Yeah. Then I will use my action to go as far as I can up the stairs, running through people's legs if I make it that far.
MATT: Yep. It'll get you just past Ashton.
LAURA: You can catch the other end of the chain and you can jump through the portal, if you're holding on it.
LIAM: I will Action Surge to go up in front of Fearne.
ASHLEY: That's a great idea.
LIAM: I will use Bait and Switch--
MATT: To switch her right here?
LIAM: So she'll take a step behind me. I'll be the closest to the Key, but I will give extra AC to Fearne so she doesn't get hurties. I'll raise my shield, and you get an extra six to your AC 'til the start of my next turn.
ASHLEY: Yay!
MATT: Oh god. This is such--
LIAM: Oh dear.
MATT: I don't know why I did this.
SAM: You have three guys on one tile.
MATT: I know.
LAURA: Maybe get a little--
MATT: I was like, "Oh well, you know, depending on what they do, maybe this won't be such a thing." Well, it all happened here. No, it's fine.
TRAVIS: We're idiots.
MATT: No, no, the-- No--
TRAVIS: Did we spread out and draw their attention in multiple directions? No.
LAURA: No.
MATT: No, no, it's good.
TRAVIS: We did the Blitzkrieg.
MATT: I should've prepared for this and given it more anchoring.
SAM: Fearne's falling, Fearne's falling, Fearne's falling.
LIAM: Oh no, my toys won't stay where I want them to.
MATT: This is fine. (laughter)
LIAM: This is incredible! (laughter)
LIAM: Come on, 10 years ago, large pieces of paper, Sharpie.
ASHLEY: Yes.
TRAVIS: Oh yeah, oh yeah.
MATT: I know.
ASHLEY: We don't care.
LIAM: That was great, too.
MATT: Fucking stay. All right.
LIAM: This is great. Orym, that gets you-- Shifted her off to the side, protecting her. Is that your turn?
LIAM: Yeah, shield's up in front of her tummy.
MATT: Chetney, you're up. Imogen, you're on deck.
ASHLEY: Tum-tum.
LIAM: I'm guarding your marsupial pouch.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TRAVIS: Can I try to use my 40 feet to move underneath this obstacle and through this window?
MATT: Yeah, you can do that.
TRAVIS: So I'll move him, if you want. I'd like to come out and see if five, 10, 15, 20, 20, 25.
MATT: 25 will be on the other side.
TRAVIS: I'd like to come over here.
MATT: Okay, so basically 35 to get you about there.
TRAVIS: Great.
MATT: As you rush away, the warder's going to make an opportunity attack on you with a heavy swing.
TRAVIS: That's right.
MATT: That's going to be a 24 to hit.
TRAVIS: Definitely hits.
MATT: All right, so as it hits you from behind, you take-- That's a really bad damage roll. You take 10 points of bludgeoning damage.
TRAVIS: Five.
MATT: Sorry, 11 points of bludgeoning damage reduced to five. Same for you, yeah. Like, woo! Scoots you a little bit.
TRAVIS: Do I need to make the save to see if it pins me?
MATT: Actually, yeah, you would. So see if it knocks you prone on the way out. Another strength save.
MARISHA: Come on.
MATT: With advantage.
TRAVIS: With advantage. Yeah, 22.
MATT: 22, yeah. It gives you a little boost, as much as it hurts. It arcs you a little bit and you clamber up through the hole. You get up on the other side, and that's you at 35 feet.
TRAVIS: Am I in contact with this arcane thing?
MATT: Yeah, you'd be base-to-base with it.
TRAVIS: Should I-- I'm going to give it a shot. Can I try and grab it and turn it towards mind sucker up in the air?
MATT: Sure, so what you do is you leap onto it and climb down to where the controls are, which are down where you first got to it. So you have to clamber down. As you grab the two elements that shift and rotate it, it shifts you with it like you're on the outside of a forklift--
TRAVIS: (wavering yell)
MATT: -- giving it direction. (laughter) The whole thing rotates around with you on the back part of it over here, hanging in the middle.
SAM: Just a wolf on a lightning Gatling gun.
MATT: Yeah, just-- (powerful revving)
LIAM: You're fully a Frank Frazetta painting now. (laughter)
MARISHA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Yes.
MATT: All right.
TRAVIS: Can I try and take a shot at the guy, the creature hovering in the air?
LIAM: Arching his back.
MATT: You can indeed.
LAURA: (howls)
MATT: So you already rolled arcana and investigating. I will say roll a d20 and add your intelligence modifier to it.
SAM: Damn it. Not wisdom.
LAURA: He's so smart.
TRAVIS: I'm the smartest one in the group. (laughs) That is a nine plus five, 13.
SAM: That's 14.
TRAVIS: 14.
LAURA: 14. (laughs)
TALIESIN: 14.
TRAVIS: I'm the smartest guy in the group.
MATT: Okay, 14. So that sets the DC that he has to save against it with his dexterity saving.
TRAVIS: (grumbling) Ah, oh yeah, oh yeah.
MARISHA: It might be shit dex.
MATT: No, he succeeds.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
MATT: So he takes half damage. As you turn around and-- (energy building) (lightning blasts) It fires out this bright blast of blue-white lightning that shoots up towards it. It just turns in time. Its eyes go wide as it ducks out of the way, psychically shifting it. It still hits from the back of the shoulder and you watch it arc through its body. Go ahead and roll 12d6 for me. (exclaiming)
LAURA: Shit!
MATT: He takes half damage.
MARISHA: Kill it.
LIAM: Shoot his butt.
TRAVIS: Oh my god.
SAM: Shoot his butt.
TRAVIS: Oh my god. Six, 11--
SAM: Wowsers.
TRAVIS: -- 14.
SAM: Wowsers-ronie.
TRAVIS: 19, 26.
LIAM: Remember when you were a kid at the beginning of the episode?
SAM: (laughs)
ASHLEY: (laughs)
TRAVIS: 43 points of damage.
MATT: 43 points, so it takes 21 points of lightning damage.
MARISHA: Kill it.
MATT: "(groans)" It's starting to look pretty hurt.
TRAVIS: Okay.
LIAM: Good.
MATT: But a heavy strike. You can feel the ozone, the rest of your fur is slightly singed and burnt from the proximity of the blast and you can feel it all standing up a bit like you're filled with static electricity.
TRAVIS: That's my turn.
MATT: That is indeed your turn. I also need you to roll a d20 for me.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: On a five or lower, the machine breaks, because you don't really know the inner workings of it.
TRAVIS: Seven.
MATT: Seven.
MARISHA: Wow.
MATT: It's holding on.
MARISHA: Wow!
MATT: (laughs) Okay, finishing Chetney's go. Imogen, you're up, with FCG on deck.
LAURA: I use Chetney's attack to my advantage and right when I see that lightning go off on the Thought Eater and he's darting out of the way, I want to try to hit him with Telekinesis and grab him up so that he's distracted. I'm going to try to snag him while he's--
MATT: Sure, sure. Okay.
ASHLEY: Cool.
LAURA: My Reiloran buddy disappears.
MATT: Okay. Sent back to where it came, but you begin to now make a force of wills. However, its will is currently torn between multiple places as you cast Telekinesis towards the Thought Eater.
TRAVIS: Did he roll-- Does the Reiloran go on your turn in the initiative or does he get his own?
LAURA: Goes right after me.
TRAVIS: Oh.
MATT: Yeah. All right, so it has to make a strength check versus your ability check. I will give you advantage on your ability check for this because it's distracted by the lightning strike that Chetney sent forth.
LAURA: Okay, great. So I'm rolling--
MATT: Twice and then add five.
LAURA: Plus my charisma. Okay.
MATT: Or whatever your charisma modifier is.
LAURA: Okay, which is five, yes. No. 10.
MATT: 10? Yeah, it got a 13.
LAURA: Yeah, oof.
ASHLEY: Damn!
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: This is the worst roll tonight.
MATT: That's rough, that's rough.
LAURA: Worst roll yet.
MATT: You reach out for it, and even though the lightning's striking through it, you try and grasp it and you feel like its physical body is overtaken by its psychic body, almost like it pushes outward and becomes psychically larger than it physically is there, and your mind can't quite grasp around it. It simply (grunts), it shrugs off your intent to hold it taut.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: All right, that was your action. You still have your movement.
LAURA: (sighs) Yeah.
TALIESIN: We got to get everybody out of here.
LAURA: I know.
MATT: Oh gosh.
LAURA: I'm still on the ground, but I got ways.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: Okay. You stay on the ground?
LAURA: (waggles tongue)
LIAM: You're squishy.
LAURA: One moment, please.
LIAM: You're squishy.
LAURA: I'm going to Quicken a spell and I'm going to Mind Sliver him.
TRAVIS: ♪ Mind Sliver ♪
LAURA: Right after I do that.
MATT: Okay. What save?
LAURA: It's an intelligence save.
MATT: Intelligence save, 18.
LAURA: 18. So he saves.
MATT: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Damn it.
LAURA: Yeah. Great.
ASHLEY: Fuck.
LAURA: That's okay. It was a cantrip. It's fine.
ASHLEY: Okay. Okay. Okay.
MARISHA: Painful.
MATT: All righty.
TALIESIN: It's tough when you're fighting Professor X.
MATT: Finishes your go there, Imogen. FCG, you're up, then it's Ishto.
LAURA: Sorry, guys.
MATT: Then the Thought Eater.
LAURA: That was pathetic.
SAM: Imogen!
MATT: No, bad rolls sometimes. It's okay.
SAM: You're great. It's okay.
LIAM: Hold for Ishto.
SAM: Ishto's going to finish this for us. Should I go for the Thought Eater or for the big guy who might smash the scaffolding that we're on? Probably the big guy that's going to smash the scaffolding, right?
TALIESIN: Probably.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Do we have that EMP thing?
SAM: I have EMP. I know the three choices are instant, one minute, or 10 minutes.
MATT: Correct.
SAM: Is the instant like click-boom or is it click?
MATT: No, it's like--
SAM: Well, shit!
ASHLEY: That seems like a bad design.
LAURA: That seems like a bad design.
SAM: Bad design! I'm going to have a word with Allura, or whoever gave this to me, I don't remember. Or was it Percy?
ASHLEY: Imahara Joe, or no?
SAM: No.
TALIESIN: It wasn't meant for you.
LAURA: It was Percy.
MARISHA: Do you have Mage Hand?
MATT: (laughs) It was meant for against things like you.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: Well, I can't do shit.
LAURA: So hand it to somebody else.
SAM and LAURA: (laugh)
TALIESIN: How long's the short one? 60 seconds, or--?
LAURA: Yeah, which is too long.
TALIESIN: Okay, that's too--
SAM: I will--
MATT: But I mean, to be fair, it also affects enchantments on a certain level or below. So you're not sure what it would affect.
SAM: Sure.
MATT: Like 6th-level spells in the area instantly stopped and prevented casting for a minute within.
LAURA: Mm.
SAM: I will start hopping up. I guess I go for the Thought Eater then?
LAURA: Yeah, go for the Thought Eater.
SAM: Ay-yi-yi.
MATT: What are you doing?
SAM: I'll start hopping up the stairs.
MATT: Okay, there's not a whole lot room left up here, so you'll have to get between Ashton and Fearne and these stairs are pretty full at the moment.
SAM: Oh boy. We're going to fall off these stairs, aren't we?
MARISHA: Crowd crush.
ASHLEY: We got to start going in.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: She's looking rough?
LAURA: Yeah. Go in if you can go in!
SAM: Can I get in? I don't think I have that much movement, do I?
MATT: To get up into it, you mean?
SAM: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Go in.
LAURA: Go in, go in.
SAM: I'm your only healer.
LAURA: Doesn't matter, go in.
TALIESIN: Doesn't matter.
LAURA: We got to start going through.
ASHLEY: I can heal.
MATT: Are you going to give it a shot?
ASHLEY: I can do some healing.
SAM: As I'm going, I'm going to shoot at Thought Eater.
LIAM: Yeah, that's good.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: When I ate those souls, it just changed something inside of me. I feel like I have this new power.
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: (laughs)
LAURA: (screams)
SAM: Yeah.
TRAVIS: (laughs) Yeah.
MARISHA: Just banshee scream.
SAM: I'm going to turn to the Thought Eater and open my mouth, and a soul is going to escape in a bolt, in a Guiding Bolt. (laughter)
SAM: In a 3rd-level Guiding scream Bolt.
MATT: (projectile soul screaming) (laughter)
MATT: All righty. (laughter)
SAM: I'm going to try to hit her with it, and that's it. Here it goes, I get to roll at advantage because my friends just got a natural 20, and this is terrible. It's a 17.
MATT: A 17? A 17 hits.
LAURA: Yay!
SAM: All right, great. Great, great, great. 3rd-level means 6d6.
MATT: 6d6, that's great!
SAM: I only have one.
ASHLEY: Here, here, I have--
SAM: Thank you, that's plenty. I got them, we're good.
TALIESIN: That's the one that you always want more of is the d6.
ASHLEY: Ooh!
SAM: It's good. Okay. 26 points of radiant damage?
MATT: 26 points of radiant damage, and it is guided for the next strike against it, great.
SAM: Yeah, so the next strike against it has advantage.
ASHLEY: Advantage.
LAURA: Then go through the tunnel, if you can go through the tunnel.
SAM: I will bonus action give you another d6, and I will try to get through the--
MATT: All right, FCG ascends, rolling past all of you up--
SAM: Can I make it?
MATT: -- the somewhat now rickety staircase rushing up past.
ASHLEY: I'll try to make room.
MATT: You both make room off to the side, holding onto the edge of the Key, and as--
SAM: I'm the healer.
MATT: FCG, as you come to the edge--
ASHLEY: I can heal, I can heal.
MATT: -- you look up and it's almost blinding, the sheer volume of flickering red light in front of you and you feel that slight reverse of gravity in your area and there's this call. Do you cross the threshold?
TRAVIS: FCG?
MARISHA and MATT: (laugh)
MARISHA: Bertrand! (laughs)
ASHLEY: I can heal, if I need to.
LAURA: Go.
MARISHA: Do it.
TALIESIN: Pussy, is that you?
LAURA: Go!
MARISHA: I've got Wither and Bloom.
SAM: We just did a bonding trust exercise.
LAURA: Go! Exactly!
ASHLEY: You'll have to trust that we'll get through.
LIAM: Trust us to make it through.
SAM: I trust you and I'll just fall back. (laughter)
SAM: I fall back right into the Bloody Bridge.
MATT: As you do, you drift up and you all, glancing over, watch as FCG lifts up for a second and then (sudden swoosh).
MARISHA: (gasps)
MATT: Just--
SAM: Oh god, it feels horrible! (laughter)
MATT: Vanishes up the bridge. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Oh shit.
MATT: All righty.
LAURA: They're just waiting on the other side. (impact)
MARISHA: Yeah.
MARISHA: That's a--
SAM: Hi!
LAURA: Fuck!
MARISHA: That's the real joke.
MATT: Ishto is going to get up and fly. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Woo-wee.
MATT: Looking at the--
LAURA: He just now stood up?
MATT: Yep.
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM: (deeply) Okay.
SAM: He sucks.
LIAM: Let me wind it up. (laughter)
LIAM: Here I go.
MATT: He's beat to shit. You guys are so judgmental.
LAURA: He's got one point.
SAM: This guy. (laughter)
MATT: Like I've seen you do better in some situations. All right. (laughter)
MATT: He also, there's been some bad luck on his case, but he gets--
ASHLEY: He gets advantage now.
MATT: He gets up and he sees the Vanguard member in front of him, looks up the rest of you and says, "I got this," and is going to rush forward and grapple the Vanguard figure in front of him and attempt to, actually, he's going to try and first hit him to shove him--
LAURA: What a hero.
MATT: -- because he gets two attacks. He's going to shove him back,
MARISHA: He's got one hit point. He's doing all this as he's bleeding out.
SAM: He's got 12, he's okay.
LAURA: He is!
MATT: No, he has one right now.
ASHLEY: He is going to save the day.
SAM: What? How did that happen?
MARISHA: He fell on to Orym.
SAM: (laughs) He fell!
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN: We were supposed to heal him, but you apparently left. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Fine, whatever, that was the plan, clearly.
MATT: So he shoves the figure back into the wreckage and then follows in after him roaring. "May you be judged with us all,"
LIAM: Is this Smite?
LAURA: Ooh.
MATT: And is going to Divine Smite.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Ooh.
MATT: Grabbing its glaive from it and it's going to strike downward for a 25, which hits.
LAURA: Yes!
MATT: Full spellcast on that.
ASHLEY: And you get advantage!
LAURA: No, not on the body.
TALIESIN: Not that one.
ASHLEY: Never mind. (laughter)
LIAM: What's up, I got a big Smite!
ASHLEY: Don't mind me.
LAURA: Just kidding.
ASHLEY: JK, JK, JK.
MATT: With the additional glaive damage that's going to be--
SAM: Don't! Don't do it, Travis. You don't know what could happen.
TALIESIN: You are so far back there.
SAM: Ooh! Ooh!
MATT: 30! 35 points of damage, which is--
SAM: Five, four...
LIAM: Wait, what? Uh-oh.
SAM: Three, two.
ALL: Oh! (laughter)
LIAM: It's all in his hood. (laughter)
TRAVIS: It's so cold. It's ice.
MARISHA: Yo, I almost threw away my coffee in that earlier, so I'm glad I didn't. (laughter)
MATT: (claps)
MARISHA: Aah!
SAM, LAURA, and ASHLEY: Ugh! (laughter)
TALIESIN: All right.
MATT: That's--
ASHLEY: I know, give me one to squish.
MATT: You watch as the arc comes down with a flash, it strikes this Vanguard member and as the glaive carves into the Vanguard member's chest, it gives that a silent scream as it goes still. That one strike takes out--
LAURA: Damn!
MATT: -- Vanguard and with 10 feet left--
ASHLEY: Nice.
LAURA: He's a hero, he's still going, y'all,
MATT: He's going to--
ASHLEY: Give me one.
MATT: -- rush off to this side, try and distract.
LIAM: He's still going.
TRAVIS: Oh my god.
MATT: That's going to finish his turn.
LAURA: What a hero.
TALIESIN: Motherfucker.
MATT: All right, with that, it's now the Reiloran Thought Eater's go.
TALIESIN: Shit!
MATT: The Thought Eater is going to look over at you, Orym.
LIAM: Son of a fuck.
MATT: And is going to attempt to dominate you.
LIAM: Oh wow.
MATT: I need you to make a wisdom saving throw.
LIAM: But I have advantage because of Heroes' Feast.
MATT: You do have an advantage because of the Heroes' Feast.
MARISHA: Come on!
LIAM: Unless it's sexy, in which case, I'll allow it. It's terrible.
LAURA: No, it's not, it's not.
LIAM: It is a 13, but I will use Indomitable. Indominatablebleble, and reroll again and would be at advantage again?
MATT: What does it say for the actual ability?
LIAM: Well, I get to redo a save a day.
MATT: Correct, I'm going to double checking to see if it says reroll dice or reroll the entire save.
LIAM: Okay, "You can reroll a saving throw that you fail. You must use the new roll. You can use this one time--"
MATT: Yeah, reroll it, do both.
LIAM: Much better.
LAURA and TALIESIN: Woof!
LIAM: Much better, 19.
MATT: 19 will resist it.
LAURA: Yes!
MATT: (laughs) Ah, dang it, that would've been fun.
LAURA: Oh god!
ASHLEY: That would not have been fun.
LAURA: That would not have--
LIAM: I would've started carving you guys up.
MATT: You would've started pushing attacking you off of the top of the-- dang it.
ASHLEY: Yeah. That would have been--
MATT: Oh, what could have been.
LIAM: Tricky Dick.
TRAVIS: No, thank you.
MATT: What could've been.
TRAVIS: No, thank you at all.
MATT: Okay.
ASHLEY: Nar, nar, nar, nar.
LIAM: Pushing attack, pushing attack, pushing attack.
MATT: Frustrated as you're unable to do that, however, it's going to shoving attack you, Fearne.
LIAM: It's going to do more shit.
MATT: I need you--
LAURA: Oh, like it can shove.
MATT: -- as a bonus action, Telekinetic Shove. It's funny, it's like the Reilorans all get them. You have to make a strength saving throw.
ASHLEY: (blows raspberry)
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Okay.
LAURA: Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.
ASHLEY: All right, Guide myself?
MATT: No. (laughter)
ASHLEY: I have nothing I can add, right?
MATT: No, unfortunately.
LIAM: Hold up. (whooshes) Okay, now. (laughter)
MATT: But I respect the hustle, I respect the hustle.
ASHLEY: Wait, is this a spell or a magical effect?
MATT: No, it's a psychic effect.
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: It's literally just going (whooshes)
ASHLEY: Oh, well, I have a minus two. I rolled a 19, a 17.
LAURA: Oh, but still.
MATT: 17 succeeds!
ASHLEY: It does?!
MATT: It's a DC 15.
LAURA: Ah!
ASHLEY: Yes!
MARISHA: Ah!
MATT: Oh man, I can't believe you made that!
TRAVIS: That is so fucking clutch.
MATT: I was looking forward to--
TRAVIS: I was sure you were falling off there.
MATT: Man.
TRAVIS: Chutes and Ladders.
MATT: Okay, no, well done.
LIAM: Wow.
MATT: I'm happy for you. I'm disappointed for the Mouse Trap-like series of bad things that would've come from that.
ASHLEY: Oh, I know, I know.
MATT: Ah, well done, well done. You--
ASHLEY: Well done, dice.
MATT: You--
ASHLEY: Up top. (hands clap)
SAM: Oh no, she fell off. (laughter)
MATT: You've been through a lot recently and here--
ASHLEY: Do not... ...fuck with me right now! (laughter)
ASHLEY: I'm tired! I'm scared! (laughter)
MATT: The Reiloran's looking at you like--
ASHLEY: I just need to get up that Bloody Bridge! (laughter)
MATT: You feel this slight pain in your heel as the tiny--
SAM: It's like Pretty Blood Bridge time.
LAURA: Oh, the possum. M
MATT: The tiny opossum is gnawing at you angrily.
LAURA: Oh, the possum, you haven't picked him up yet?
ASHLEY: Oh, I can't yet, I've been petting him. (laughter)
ASHLEY: It's okay.
MATT: Okay, that's going to go ahead-- You know what? It's going to go ahead and--
LAURA: No, no.
LIAM: You get nothing, you lose.
LAURA: No, no, don't do it.
MATT: Yeah, it's going to drift a little bit closer here and no, I'm not going to take this one out.
LIAM: Yeah, come closer.
MATT: I'm going to place it--
LIAM: Come over here.
MARISHA: Come here, yeah, yeah, come on. Come over here.
ASHLEY: Get a little taste of this.
TALIESIN: I'm little worried about Imogen and Laudna getting out of here.
LIAM: Come and arm wrestle me.
LAURA: I got this.
TALIESIN: Okay.
MATT: It's going to get to about--
LAURA: I'm worried about Chet getting out of here.
TALIESIN: Chet's also worrisome.
MATT: About 15 feet from all those top stairs.
LAURA: I can get you out, Chet.
MATT: All right, that finishes its go.
LAURA: In your head, you hear--
MATT: Laudna, you're up.
ASHLEY: What is he-- He's planning something.
LAURA: Of course he's planning something!
TRAVIS: He had to fucking move there.
MATT: Laudna, you're up.
LAURA: Yeah, he's doing it on purpose.
TRAVIS: Smart motherfucker.
MARISHA: Oh, so all of us could get blasted, you mean?
TRAVIS: Yeah, if I hit him with that thing.
ASHLEY: Oh, that was smart.
TRAVIS: He backstopped himself.
TALIESIN: Okay, so where are we at?
TRAVIS: I applaud it.
LAURA: That's chess. That's wizard's chess.
TRAVIS: I respect it. That was--
MARISHA: Using--
LAURA: Hold on, I need to whisper. Because we have mental connections!
LIAM: That's a good idea. Yes, yes.
MARISHA: Using Spider Climb--
MATT: I respect this. This is great.
MARISHA: -- can I climb along the edge of the stairs?
MATT: Oh yeah, you can--
MARISHA: Am I way up?
MATT: Spider Climb is wild.
MARISHA: Can I get--
TALIESIN: On the side with the--
MARISHA: Because I can bonus action dash with it, right, too, and still get an action? Move, bonus action, dash?
MATT: No, bonus action dash is a rogue specific ability.
MARISHA: Oh, right.
MATT: It's an action to dash.
MARISHA: It's an action to dash.
MATT: But you can get--
MARISHA: How far? Can I get to the bridge? I'm curious if I can still make an attack or if I can get enough movement to get there.
ASHLEY: ♪ Take it to the bridge. ♪
MATT: To get to the bridge? You can do both. You can make an action as you go. You have enough movement. Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Yeah, you would get there.
MARISHA: I would get into the bridge?
MATT: Yeah, if you wanted to.
MARISHA: Okay, so--
TALIESIN: You're coming in before your turn, by the way.
MARISHA: As I skitter, skitter, skitter, I'm going to make three more Eldritch Blasts at the Reiloran.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: So as I Spider Climb, my head unhinges backwards, and I shoot it from my eyes.
MATT: (laughs) I love it.
MARISHA: Natural 20.
ASHLEY: Yes!
MARISHA: Then we have a 19.
MATT: Hits.
MARISHA: Then I have a 13, which I think misses.
MATT: 13 misses, yeah.
MARISHA: So for my nat 20--
ASHLEY: Let's go, bitch. Let's go.
MARISHA: Come on, roll high. Give me a 10, give me a 10. It was almost a seven, ut that's five, 10, 15 damage for the nat 20.
MATT: 15 damage, all right.
MARISHA: Then for the other one, okay, yeah, 11 damage.
MATT: 11 damage. As you're rushing by, you hear these whispers in your mind. (rapid spooky whispering) You get a taste of your own medicine for a moment.
MARISHA: Ooh!
MATT: It doesn't quite impact you yet, but as you rush by and you hinge backward your head and shoot these blasts out of your face towards it. It gets hit twice as it's distracted by all the things happening around it. Yeah, it's taking some hits. You want to continue?
LAURA: Go, go, go.
MARISHA: I make eye contact with Imogen. You better be right behind me.
LAURA: I will.
MARISHA: I'm going up! I say to everybody in my head.
MATT: You watch as Laudna climbs up the side until your hands begin to pull away from the side of the Key, and like you're a kitten being plucked by the scruff, you get pulled up.
MARISHA: It tingles!
MATT: And Laudna is gone, a flashing burst of energy traveling up the bridge.
MARISHA: Okay, you guys. Okay, okay!
MATT: Ashton.
SAM: Next week, it's just you and me.
MARISHA: I know!
TALIESIN: So, I have to burn an action to undo my hammer.
MATT: Yes.
TALIESIN: I'm going to take that action to undo my hammer. I'm going to, let's see, how far is it? Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.
MARISHA: You can make it.
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm just curious if I can drag anybody with me. Can I use a bonus action to drag somebody in there with me, or no?
MATT: If you want to drag somebody with you, it's forceful movement, which means they'd have to, one, assent to it, and it would be half your movement to pull them along the way, I'd say.
TALIESIN: If I had enough room, movement, could I take two people? If I let them go, if I had tons of movement, let's say?
MATT: You can certainly try. There will be rolls involved, because plying somebody to the bridge gives a threat of bringing you along, so we'd have to roll to see if you--
TALIESIN: I'm not leaving the bridge.
MATT: Okay, then it depends. What are you trying to do?
TALIESIN: I'm going to hit a Chaos Burst and I'm going to double my walking speed. Where's my pen? I put it away. There it is. So my walking speed is now 80.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: I'm going to run up the stairs, grab this one, and throw him into the portal.
MATT: Okay, do you consent to this or do you resist it?
LIAM: I mean, I think he's really small and he couldn't stop it.
MATT: I'll allow that.
TALIESIN: We talked about this.
LIAM: You said it to me.
TALIESIN: Yeah, I said it to you. You didn't say anything back.
LIAM: I didn't. I don't think I'm going to stop it.
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: But I think Orym would say: Wait, no, I've got to make sure everyone gets--
TALIESIN: Oh yeah, hell no.
MATT: Okay, well, as your turn begins, you hear those whispers through your head. They bite and grind like shards of glass that pierce into your brain. I need you to make a wisdom saving throw at the top of your turn.
TALIESIN: With advantage?
MATT: The Whispering Aura of the Thought Eater.
TALIESIN: The top of my turn would have been, okay, before any of this happened.
MATT: Correct, because you are within 15 feet--
TALIESIN: Wisdom. Advantage, right?
MATT: Yep.
LAURA: (laughs) Bye!
LIAM: Bye.
MARISHA: So did Orym go up?
MATT: Not yet.
TALIESIN: No.
MARISHA: Not yet. (louder) Not yet.
LIAM: (off-screen) Not yet.
MARISHA: He just said not yet.
TALIESIN: 15, which is really good for me.
MATT: 15 just misses.
TALIESIN: Just misses? Fuck.
MATT: DC's 16 for that one.
ASHLEY: Fuck!
MATT: You take 12 points of psychic damage at the top of your round, but that's it.
TALIESIN: Oh, is that it?
LAURA: So he still sent Orym on his way?
TALIESIN: As long as, yeah, because--
MATT: So you rush over. Orym, as you're ready You watch this flash blur of red and blue come by as Ashton picks you up by the shoulder and-- (yelps)
TALIESIN: Fearne?
MATT: You watch as Orym vanishes up into the bridge.
LIAM: Orym didn't want to go, but I think it makes much more sense for Ashton to be able to pick him up and chuck him.
MATT: Correct.
TALIESIN: Yeah, if you had really made it a thing.
ASHLEY: Wait, wait, wait! We've got to make sure everybody gets up here.
TALIESIN: Fuck. Yeah, no.
MATT: Are you going to resist it or not?
TALIESIN: You can resist it. Up to you.
ASHLEY: I'm not very strong.
LAURA: Go.
ASHLEY: Okay.
TALIESIN: Yeah, if you put 'go' in everyone's head.
ASHLEY: Fuck you! (laughs)
TALIESIN: Yep.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: I throw her in. With the last of my speed, walk out, and then we're out.
MATT: You are strong and fast.
ASHLEY: Shit.
MATT: I'll allow it.
MARISHA: So we're missing Ashton, Imogen, and Chetney.
TALIESIN: No, I'm out. It's just Imogen, you, and Chet.
SAM: You're out.
TALIESIN: Oh, you're out. Imogen and Chet, that's it.
LAURA: You went through the gate?
TALIESIN: I'm through.
MARISHA: And Ishto.
TALIESIN: You said you're fine.
MARISHA: And the possum.
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Oh! (stammering)
TALIESIN: I would have grabbed the possum.
ASHLEY: I put the possum in my--
TALIESIN: If she hadn't grabbed the possum.
MATT: I'm going to say the possum wasn't your immediate concern.
TALIESIN: That's fair.
MATT: I've let this turn stretch quite a bit.
TALIESIN: That's fair.
MATT: So I'll say that's about where we get.
ASHLEY: I was going to put the possum in my bag on my turn. Can I grab the possum before I'm thrown into the Bloody Bridge, not that I need it.
MATT: Your turn was in a few rounds.
LAURA: Yeah, your turn is next.
MATT: I'll tell you what. Roll a dexterity check for me.
SAM: It's a bad guy. You'd be taking a bad guy with us.
ASHLEY: I know! Well, I don't know! Don't we have to put it in the bag?
MATT: Because here's the thing--
ASHLEY: I don't have to put it in the stupid bag.
MATT: No, no, no, it's okay. I'm saying because it doesn't want to be grabbed and you're trying to grab it, it's you contested against this possum.
ASHLEY: Come here!
MATT: It's going to be a plus two to its roll.
ASHLEY: (laughs) No.
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Slippery little thing!
MATT: You reach for it, and it bites your hand. You're like, "Fuck!"
ASHLEY: Ow!
MATT: It rolled an 18.
LAURA: You shit!
MATT: It was a natural 16.
ASHLEY: Fuck off!
MATT: (snarling) It hisses at you.
ASHLEY: Ah! (furry poof) (laughter)
LAURA: My hand!
MATT: Before you vanish up into the bridge. With that, that brings us to--
LAURA: Oh no.
SAM: Y'all are going to be okay.
MATT: The possum vanishes. (surprised yells)
MARISHA: Oh shit! Oh shit! (laughter)
TRAVIS: Amazing. Amazing.
MATT: Yeah, it's going after her.
LAURA: Okay, okay.
TALIESIN: There you are.
MATT: This other juggernaut on this side--
TALIESIN: Just got to grab the fucker.
MATT: -- is going to hold its action. Actually, you know what?
SAM: Hold its action?
MATT: It's going to leap up onto the arm and into the hand of this warder.
MARISHA: That's cool.
TALIESIN: You two better fucking do this.
MATT: Now comes the warder's turn. This one here is going to attempt to push this ruin over onto the device that you're running.
LAURA: Oh god.
SAM: Whoa, cool.
MATT: Oh yeah, it grabs the side and pushes it. As it does, this whole ruin collapses over, falling.
MARISHA: Oh shit!
SAM: Oh no, he pushed a house on it.
MATT: The side of the ruin crumbles over this way. I need you to make a dexterity saving throw for me.
MARISHA: Come on.
TRAVIS: Dexterity saving throw.
TALIESIN: I had to leave. I was going to get dominated.
LAURA: No, yeah, you've got to go.
ASHLEY: Yeah, that wouldn't have been good.
TRAVIS: 19.
TALIESIN: That would've been real bad.
MATT: 19. So you're not restrained.
TALIESIN: Either of us getting dominated.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: You do take--
LIAM: Is the possum all right?
LAURA: The possum went up!
TALIESIN: Watch me burn all that goodwill I just worked so hard to-- (laughs) Into the portal!
MATT: You take 25 points of bludgeoning damage, reduced to 12.
TRAVIS: 12.
MATT: And you are prone.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: But you are not restrained. There's a chance that would have fallen all over you, and you would have been buried under rubble.
TRAVIS: Woof.
MATT: This Warder is going to take the juggernaut and--
TRAVIS: Oh shit!
MATT: -- lob it up towards the bridge.
LAURA: Epic.
TALIESIN: Whoa!
LAURA: Oh shit.
MATT: Which--
LAURA: Did he miss?
MATT: It rolled a two on its strength check.
TRAVIS: Oh!
LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: So I'm going to say it chucks it, and the juggernaut arcs a little bit too low. (screaming) (thuds) (laughter)
TRAVIS: Please hit the hovering Thought Eater.
MATT: Unfortunately, no.
LAURA: No no no no no!
TRAVIS: That would've been a one.
MATT: If it was a one, I would have let it. On a one, it would have hit the Thought Eater.
TRAVIS: Damn it, Carl!
MATT: He does roll okay on his acrobatics check, so he catches himself, but he still takes fall damage. So that juggernaut does take--
LIAM: The Prestige!
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA and LAURA: (laugh)
MATT: Actually, that's a rough roll. It took 17 points of bludgeoning damage on that fall.
TALIESIN: Off the board.
MATT: All right, so that one hits the ground, looks back up to the tower, and is going to prepare itself for the next round. Fearne's turn is done, Orym's gone. Chet, you're up.
TRAVIS: I'll get up from my prone position, which is half my speed.
MATT: Half your speed.
TRAVIS: So I'll use the next 20 feet to try and book it towards where Imogen is.
MATT: Five, 10, 15, 20. That gets you there. That's your movement.
TRAVIS: Nice.
MATT: You have your action still, if you want to dash or do something else.
TRAVIS: Yeah, I have Turmoil out. I think I've already used it once. Yeah, I'll dash and I'll keep going.
MATT: Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40 gets you about 10 feet from Imogen.
LAURA: Okay.
TRAVIS: Amazing. That's my turn.
MATT: Okay. That finishes up. Imogen, you're up.
LAURA: Okay. Yeah, I'm going to go over to Chet.
MATT: Mm-hmm.
LAURA: Hold onto your arm. (laughs)
TRAVIS: Like Wizard of Oz?
LAURA: Yeah. (laughs) I'm going to read the spell of Dimension Door.
SAM: Nice.
MATT: Oh.
ASHLEY: Cool.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: We have one of those?
MATT: You pull the scroll out.
LAURA: Uh-huh.
MATT: You begin muttering the incantation, and as you glance up past the edge of the scroll as you finish the final phrase, you can see the Thought Eater, that stare bearing down on you. In your mind, you hear, "We'll come and we'll find you. I would like to taste what's in that mind."
LAURA: I'm going to kill you and all your friends.
MARISHA: Villain arc. (vanishing whoosh)
MATT: You both vanish, teleporting into the base of the bridge?
LAURA: Right at the edge, yeah.
MATT: As you both appear, you both appear, and it looks like you're about to fall, but you continue to drift slowly up arm in arm as you both look at each other and look up at the ever intense, glowing, bright red, shaking energy, before--
LAURA: ♪ We're off to see the wi-- ♪ (yells)
MATT: (magical thrust)
MATT: All of you, in your journeys, being thrust through this massive beam of alien energy, you don't see anything but red, bright, sun-like light. It's blinding, and the sense of being pulled at an incredible speed, you fear if you were to hit a wall, you would just become atoms. Within just moments, it's gone. Here, as you stand suddenly, the red light filtering behind you, your eyes come to focus, and you can see the structure that's built around you, the returning point of the Malleus Key. Walls and boundaries, barricades built around it. You can see this red plant growth that filters through the gray and red rock. There's a little cluster here of Exandrian stone that builds into the red and ruddy shale that sits around it. You can see the dusty plumes of red storms that swirl on the horizon, and just beyond them, above, you can see the endless sea of stars and the entirety of Exandria there, consuming a quarter of the sky above you. And that's where we're going to end tonight's episode.
TRAVIS: Whoa, we're on the moon!
TALIESIN: We did it, on the moon!
MARISHA: We made it to the moon!
TRAVIS: Lunar landing!
TALIESIN: Clutch.
MARISHA: Oh my god!
TALIESIN: Clutch as fuck, clutch as fuck.
LIAM: We made it to the moon.
TRAVIS: Lunar landing.
SAM: Where's Ishto?
LIAM: Shout out to Ishto!?
SAM: Where's Ishto?
LIAM: Sing the song of Ishto.
SAM: Where is Ishto?
TRAVIS: Wow.
SAM: You brought Ishto, right? Right?!
LAURA: Ishto told us to go.
SAM: Did he, though?
MATT: Now, we'll pick up from here next session.
MARISHA: We've got that possum.
ASHLEY: We haven't landed yet.
MATT: We're still in initiative order.
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Oh.
LAURA: They're going to come through.
TRAVIS: There's a possum in the bridge.
MARISHA: There's a possum in the bridge!
MATT: Yep! (possum screaming)
SAM: And maybe Ishto. (laughter)
LIAM: We also have no idea where we've landed, what's around.
LAURA: That Thought Eater's probably going to--
LIAM: It's not like we were promised safe passage.
LAURA: No.
TALIESIN: I've got some insane ideas.
MATT: Well, you've got time to think about it. We'll pick up there next session. Excited for that. Thank you all for joining us. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet?
LIAM: We're on the moon!
MATT: Good night.