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Critical Role Wiki
Critical Role Wiki

List of Transcripts


MATT: Hello, everyone and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (discordant yelling) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Before we get started tonight, we have-- (laughter) We have some announcements to get through beginning with our two sponsors tonight. The first of which is Petersen Games. For those who aren't familiar with their upcoming book, they're doing their fifth edition, Cthulhu Mythos. Amazing source book for fifth edition with all the fantastic cosmic horror of the Cthulhu Mythos involved. This book is fucking gorgeous, the art is amazing. But it brings the epic horror of the Cthulhu Mythos to fifth edition. With 400 pages. It's a weighty tome. Full hardcover color awesomeness. I should read but I'm so excited to keep just talking about without looking at it. Designed by the legend himself, Sandy Petersen. The massive tome contains over 100 Cthulhu Mythos monster stats, 26 great old one stats and outer gods stats to just wipe your party immediately. Four new playable races, new character options, professions, feats, rules for insanity and dreaming as well as dozens of detailed Mythos cults--

MARISHA: Dreaming!

MATT: -- 40 new spells, 30 rituals, and our new metric rule set, plus dozens of Mythos items and artifacts. There is so much in this book and I can't get over the horrifying creature designs and drawings in there. I love this book. So anyway, make sure to check out after the video during the break for a bunch of information about this and as a special offer to our audience right now, if you use the code, criticalrole, one word when checking out at, you get $20 off the source book, which is awesome. So thanks, Petersen Games, for sponsoring us tonight. And go check them out at (cheering) I'm going to keep this one. And our second sponsor for tonight, our friends at Tabletop Tycoon. Sam, if you don't mind.

SAM: Are you imbalanced--

TRAVIS: Jesus.

SAM: --stuck in the dice tray of life? Does it feel like you're always rolling snake eyes? Well, welcome to the self-help seminar that will boost your luck forever. Hi, I'm Nathaniel "Nat" Twenty, a motivational speaker, guru, and sentient piece of plastic. This patented method will give you the tools to uncock your dice and unlock the advantage within.

MATT: Oh, no.

SAM: My book, Dodeca-Heal Yourself--

LAURA: Oh my god! (laughter)

TRAVIS: It shouldn't look that good. (laughter continues)

SAM: Dodeca-Heal Yourself, the 20 sides to a better you is only the beginning. Through my seminars, workshops, and expensive one-on-one dice coaching sessions, I will change your inspiration from a d4--

MARISHA: Oh, I hate this guy.

SAM: --to a d10. (laughter) And today, just for the people in this room and the students watching my seminar at home, I'm announcing a special sponsorship partnership with Tabletop Tycoon and their forthcoming campaign for their PolyHero Dice. (surprised noise) Channel the divine with dice for clerics of all types and bless your whole party with new sets for warriors, rogues, and wizards. Each cleric set includes eight dice including hammer, mace, and healing potions. Also available is a remastered Warrior Set and the popular rogue and wizard dice sets with some new fancy colors. Each set comes with two d20s and more colors and styles will be unlocked as more support rolls in. Now, to show you the power of the PolyHero Dice and my system. I want you all to repeat this mantra after me.

MATT: (resigned) Okay.

SAM: "I commit."

ALL: I commit.

SAM: "I admit."

ALL: I admit.

SAM: "I am fit."

ALL: I am fit.

SAM: "I will crit."

ALL: I will crit. (laughter)

SAM: Now grab your d20s and roll them and show me what you got. Tell me what you rolled.

LAURA: Can we roll with advantage?

TRAVIS: Natural 20. (laughter)

SAM: The system works.

LAURA: 19!

SAM: 19, yes!

TRAVIS: We should be rolling shittier, you guys.

LIAM: I got 11 and a one on my wizard hat and book.

SAM: You need more seminars. (laughter)


SAM: 14's good!

TALIESIN: Four. Yeah.

SAM: All right. Some work.

MARISHA: I was going to roll the d2, but then you said d20. 15?

SAM: Yes! Amazing! The system works. My-- I mean, not for you guys. You two. (laughter) You need my 10 course seminar. Don't worry, I've already charged your credit cards. Until then, don't nat one in life, be the one who makes crit happen. If you unlock your inner advantage and check out the PolyHero Dice and loads of add-ons at, there's no telling how high you'll roll. Remember, don't wait for a nat 20. One is already waiting for you. (uncomfortable laughter) Matt, back to you.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Nathaniel, can you hold one fist up like this? Can you go, "It's a me?" (laughter)

SAM: It's a-me, Mario!

LIAM: Not since Taryon Darrington has there been such a polarizing character. (laughter)

MATT: Thank you, Sam.

LAURA: I love it. It's so good.

ASHLEY: I love it. I love it.

MATT: Thank you, Sam.

SAM: Thank you, Matt.

MATT: And thank you, Tabletop Tycoon.

TRAVIS: And we're sorry.

MATT: We're really sorry. All right. Our last announcement for the night, I reminded last week but also just so you guys know we are now broadcasting Critical Role on both-- and Talks Machina-- both on Twitch and the YouTube channels. You know, the YouTubes, where the kids go to watch the stuff. But the best place of course is still to participate in the community and live experience is here on our Twitch page and Twitch channel. So tonight's video will be available right away on Twitch, and for channel subscribers, and this episode will be uploaded to YouTube as VOD on Monday at noon Pacific, per usual. I think that's it. That being the case, let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of... Critical Role.

TRAVIS: We're gonna kill Caleb and Beau.

(water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion) ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware because you're about to be dead ♪ ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, ♪ ♪ roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, ahh ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call ♪ ♪ Diggin' deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn (your turn, your turn) ♪ ♪ to roll ♪ (flames whooshing)

Part I[]

MATT: And welcome back. So last we left off: The Mighty Nein has been traveling closer and closer to the ruins of Aeor. And along this path they found themselves having to travel alongside the quarry they were following as Lucien and the Tomb Takers hit them off and decided to keep each other close, like you would with a proper untrusting enemy. Went through some conversations and some travel and a couple of dangerous encounters along the way. You've bonded a bit, shared some things, one of which involved requesting and persuading Lucien to show the tome which began his journey as the Nonagon long ago. Both Caleb and Beauregard took point to read through this book to ascertain information and glean quite a bit about where a lot of this seemed to have begun. Learned some information about Aeor, Cognouza, and where these Somnovem may have come from. But also seemed to find something far more sinister and unexplainable deeper into the book before it was snatched back by Lucien. You've found yourselves lost in an ice fog and lost a day of travel right on the cusp of arriving at your destination and took to one more night's rest where you invited the Tomb Takers in to sleep. They found their quarters. You found yours and began to plot what to do in the near future for the safety of yourselves and or halting the plot of Lucien the Nonagon. You all went to sleep. In that night's rest, Caleb and Beauregard began to see familiar patterns that they had from the book they had read before. In that darkness, a single glowing red eye came to them, bid them welcome along with a chorus of hundreds of distant buzzing screams. You both shot awake and found on your person a newly apparated red eye, not unlike those upon Lucien and your friend Mollymauk. So as you return, you have both shot awake. Caleb has disrobed a little bit to look for and finding the eye and the rest of you are starting to come to in the midst of this chaos, this tension, and look up to see this point of recognition between the two of them. And Fjord, who is awake through this, also taking in the repercussions or the connotations of what has just transpired.

LAURA: What's going on?

MARISHA: A really bad dream.

LAURA: Wake up!

SAM: Ah!

LAURA: Why are you naked?

LIAM: I'm not naked. I'm wearing pants.

LAURA: Well...

TRAVIS: You better have a wizard's explanation for that and for hers.

LAURA: Is it glowing? Is it glowing?

MATT: It's not glowing.

LAURA: It's just like a red...

MATT: Just like a red-- it looks almost like a tattoo.

LIAM: And very obviously like Mollymauk's.

MATT: Precisely like Mollymauk's.

LAURA: I'm going to crawl out of bed and run over and take Beau's hand and start looking at it.

MARISHA: I shove Caduceus awake.

LAURA: Does it feel raised? Does it feel just fully flat, like it's...

MATT: It has a texture that is different from the skin. It feels smooth. Like there is no... There is no natural ridges that the skin would maintain around it as well. It's just a perfectly smooth surface where the eye is. And do Beauregard or I feel or sense anything or hear anything? Or is there anything different other than the appearance?

MATT: Just the appearance. For now.

LIAM: Just a little light reading.

TRAVIS: You both woke up at the same time. Do you care to share what might've been happening just before that?

MARISHA: I honestly can't remember a whole lot, except for... the voices. Did you hear the voices?

LIAM: A big red eye and thousands of voices.

MARISHA: Welcoming us.

LAURA: Welcoming you?

MARISHA: Just whispers of welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. Just... endless... cacophony.

LAURA: Can you hear it now? You can't hear it now?

MARISHA: Can I hear it now?


SAM: Are you evil in some way?

LIAM: In some ways.

SAM: Well, I mean more evil.

TALIESIN: If they were, would they tell you?

SAM: Can't you sense that? Don't you have ways of sensing evil?

TALIESIN: I mean... not just general iffiness. I mean, I don't know how to cast a spell to see if someone's a little iffy. I mean, if there's something crazy happening, sure.

LAURA: I pull Beau's hand over and start touching her eye over to Caleb's eye on his shoulder. Is it doing anything?

LIAM: Not for me.

SAM: I'm going to go into our little sack. I have a little alchemical acid. With your permission, Caleb, can I just sort of try to etch it out, if it's just on the surface?

TRAVIS: Yes! I'm sorry, I'm just--

MARISHA: You go first.

SAM: It might hurt. Actually, you know what? Maybe I should do it to Beau. It's going to hurt and he's not really great with pain.

MARISHA: I want to go on record and say I don't think this is going to work. And I really would like you to not fuck up my hand. This is what I do everything with.

SAM: You're a hand model?

MARISHA: I punch people.

SAM: Oh, I see. I see. (laughter)

TRAVIS: You smash that into things that nobody else should be smashing their hand into.

LAURA: Yeah. But if it's hurt, she won't want to hit things with it. She'll try to protect it.

TRAVIS: It's so cool. You're going to hold it up, have a big scar and people will won't want to fuck with you.

MARISHA: You can do a tiny portion, a tiny portion.

SAM: Of course, of course.

ASHLEY: Yeah, but what if this... hold on. What is this affects, you know... if we have to fight something and you're not fully, you know, up to par?

MARISHA: I don't know.

LAURA: Can I try to... Can I try to heal it?

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: See what happens? I'm going to try to cast Greater Restoration on the eye.


MATT: Okay. Go ahead and mark off the cost.

LAURA: Oh, right, wait. Diamond dust.

TALIESIN: Diamond dust.

LAURA: Okay. Let me make sure I have it. I know I have it.

ASHLEY: In the meantime, I'm going to grab Beau's hand and just start just trying to rub it off.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: I know it's not going to do anything--

LAURA: (clears throat) (laughter)

ASHLEY: Just rub one out real quick.

SAM: Rub one out real quick. Yeah.

TRAVIS: I could use both hands. I only need one, though.

ASHLEY: You can just do it in one hand real fast.

TRAVIS: (DJ disc scratching sounds) (laughter)

ASHLEY: Real quick. (laughter)

MARISHA: Speed of 50. (laughter)

SAM: Haste.

LIAM: Honestly don't even need the hands. (laughter)

ASHLEY: [inaudible]

LAURA: I don't have dust. I have residuum and I have a lot of diamonds.

MATT: Residuum can be used to replace it.

LAURA: Yeah, I know. We don't have any way to just crush these diamonds real fast, do we?

LIAM: I can do it in 10 minutes.

LAURA: Okay. Yeah. Maybe do that.

SAM: You can crush diamonds?

TRAVIS: Ah, this is great.

SAM: --with your mind?

MARISHA: (laughs) I know!

TRAVIS: Who's having with fucked up dreams now?

MATT: With his thighs. (laughter)

LIAM: With my magic.

LAURA: Here, take one of the 500 gold diamonds and turn it into dust.

LIAM: All right. So I will--

SAM: Will that hinder any other future spells?

LAURA: Well, I've got quite a few diamonds now.

SAM: Okay, okay.

MATT: Yasha, try as you might, you can feel the change, or lack of texture that begins across the surface of where the eye is placed. As you rub and rub it's not reacting at all to the contact. The skin's heating up around it, but there is no friction heat generated where the actual eye is on the hand.


SAM: Should I try some acid?

MARISHA: Well, let's-- one thing at a time. Yeah?

LAURA: Yeah. Let's wait a few minutes so Caleb can do-- Oh my god. What if you can't do spells now that you have the eye?

LIAM: Well, that's a good test.

LAURA: What if it cancels all the spells like Lucien's stuff does? Oh no.

LIAM: I lay out a bit of cloth and spend the next several minutes casting Fabricate, which can change the shape of it into a fine powder.

MATT: You watch as he places out the specific required ritual structure, takes the diamond, sets it down in the center, and as he begins to weave, the spell is unabated. And you watch as it crumbles and transitions into dust.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to gather up, you know... I'm going to separate into little fifths. So I have 100 gold piles and I'm going to use one to do Greater Restoration.

MATT: Okay. You watch as the dust burns away, and as it burns away with the faint greenish-blue tint, the flames surround her hand and as she reaches out and touches you, the flame transitions and blows across your chest and arm. The eye remains.


LAURA: Fuck. Fuck!

TRAVIS: Whoa! That was the big fix we had, and it didn't work! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Shit's real now. We just cut hand off, what do you think?

TALIESIN: Want to take a--

LAURA: Well, we can't cut Caleb's shoulder off.

SAM: I will acid it. I'll acid it.

MARISHA: This isn't--

LAURA: It's in this--

MARISHA: --going to work. But maybe it'll be a cool scar. Just--

SAM: Okay. Take a little acid--

TRAVIS: Little drop.

SAM: --pour it on a little cloth. I don't know. Is that going to eat the cloth? I'm a scientist, I know how this works.

TRAVIS: Dropper.

MATT: Cloth isn't your friend in this, necessarily.

SAM: All right. Forget the cloth. (laughter)

SAM: I dribble the acid right just a little bit onto the-- oh, do you need something to bite down on? What is that?

MARISHA: I don't know.

TRAVIS: Ow, ow!

MARISHA: Sorry, Fjord, sorry! (laughter)


SAM: Here, take a crossbow bolt.


SAM: We'll heal you later. (laughter)

MATT: You drop a little bit onto the eye?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: Okay. Lands in the eye and you wince.

LIAM: (high-pitched voice) Help me.

MARISHA: (pained) Not too bad, actually.

MATT: It's not burning.

LAURA: It's not burning?

MARISHA: What do you mean it's not burning? It's not burning through?

MATT: It's just resting on the eye.

LAURA: (gasps)

LIAM: Ohhh.

SAM: Oh, like a...

MARISHA: Like a little mercury puddle?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Like, a little mercury bubble?

LAURA: Oh god, it won't even burn away. It's protected.

SAM: Whoa. It's, like, invincible?

TRAVIS: Oh, y'all are fucked!


TRAVIS: We got to kill Dracula to make that shit go away.

LAURA: Ooh, so if we attack Lucien, don't aim for the eyes.

SAM: I mean, can you just pour it back into my vial?

MARISHA: Yeah. I mean, can--

MATT: Roll a dexterity check. (laughter)

SAM: (screams)

MATT: Don't roll a one. Don't roll a one!

MARISHA: It's a straight dex check?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay. Yeah. 16.

MATT: 16. All right. It does (sizzle) a little bit on the side. And once it drifts off the eye it begins to burn the skin. You get some back in the vial. Some of it just spills off and you pull away and it hits the ground and it burns for a second, but you quickly neutralize it with whatever you have available to neutral-- If you have anything to neutralize acid or it's just you screaming for the 10 minutes.

TRAVIS: Urine.

SAM: Nope.

MATT: Nope. All right.

SAM: I have alcohol.


MATT: Okay. It's going to burn for a while.

MARISHA: (groans) Okay.

SAM: I have oil. I don't know. I should probably learn some chemistry.

MATT: You should probably have some base if you're going to be carrying around vials of acid and play with it.

SAM: Yeah. I'll get that next campaign. (laughter)

TALIESIN: We do have our daily Hail Marys if we want to try that.

LAURA: We can try but we haven't taken a long rest yet.

TALIESIN: Are we still not long rested?

MARISHA: Yeah. What time is it?

MATT: No. This has not been a full long rest yet.

TALIESIN: Oh, okay.

LAURA: We're going to have to go sleep again.

TALIESIN: Oh, in that case.

LIAM: Wee hours of the morning or night? Because there were-- some time passed, right?

MATT: Some time has passed, yeah. And you do have Keen Mind. Which in this circumstance, sure.

LIAM: And also, clocks in every room that mark--

MATT: That's true.

LIAM: -- the passing of time outside where we are.

MATT: I'll allow it, I'll allow it. I would say it's about 3:30 in the morning at this point. And you went to bed...

LAURA: Of course it is. That's when possessions happen.



LAURA: Sorry.

TALIESIN: Just out of idle curiosity, I'm going to try and cast Blindness on the eye and not on Beau.

SAM: Good. Clever.

LAURA: What are you casting?

TRAVIS: Casting Blindness.


TALIESIN: To see if it'll take a spell or not. Like, I should be able to tell the difference between a spell hitting and--

TRAVIS: You're going to blind Beau.

MARISHA: I know. All this testing.

TALIESIN: I'm not telling you, either.

MARISHA: Human testing.

MATT: Right. Okay. It is unable to grasp in the way this spell is designed. It reaches for the vision center of an individual. Since you are not focusing on her vision center, the spell just has no target and dissipates.

TALIESIN: Nevermind. I was going to say if I'm really not concentrating, I would have that moment of "it didn't wor-- oh, sorry."

MATT: Right, right. Fair enough. Good looking out.

LIAM: I mean, we would throw all the spaghetti at the wall. That's Vax. I will try Identify on Beau's hand.

MARISHA: You want to Identify?

LAURA: It's because it's hard for you--

LIAM: Yeah. It's hard, you know. I need both hands to do stuff.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, ten minutes like this.

LIAM: I can't do this.

LAURA: Cramp in your neck.

TALIESIN: I would advise against that. You might discover where it's been, and god only knows. Sorry. Carry on.

MARISHA: Does anyone want to do my nails while we're just doing everything?

TALIESIN: Does any one have a file? Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Thanks.

LAURA: Take my paints out and I'll paint your nails.

ASHLEY: You're probably better.

LAURA: Should I paint them red to match the eye?

ASHLEY: Maybe make it disappear?

MARISHA: It's kind of cool.

SAM: Can you paint them with the magical paint?

LAURA: I know, I thought about that, but I've noticed-- you know, remember when I tried to paint a door in-- Where were we? It was real magical. It didn't work. I have a feeling this is beyond the paint's capabilities. I could try.

TRAVIS: Paint off the tips of her fingers.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah.

TALIESIN: I hate to even say this. Not to suggest this, but worst case scenario, we could always try and...

LAURA: Cut it off?

TALIESIN: And then grow it back.

LAURA: I mean, I do have--

SAM: What?!

LAURA: That's true.

TALIESIN: Either of us could pull that off.

SAM: How do you grow it back?

TRAVIS: Let's be honest, we know what's going to happen if we do that. It's going to grow back with a red eye.

SAM: I don't know. Maybe it won't. That's actually kind of brilliant.

LIAM: No one's cutting off my arm.

TRAVIS: Yasha?

SAM: Well, not your arm. We can start with Beau.

LAURA: I mean, here's the thing. I feel like it's not based in her hand, you know? She had a dream, they had dreams.

TALIESIN: I agree.

LAURA: They had dreams. It's in their brain. The only solution is to cut their heads off at this point.

TRAVIS: Yeah, dreams. Nothing but bad stuff happens from dreams.

SAM: I'm just saying, it would be pretty amazing experiment if we just tried it.

TALIESIN: I would need to do it tomorrow.

LAURA: Shake your hand. It will help dry it off.

LIAM: You want to hack off Beauregard hand?

MARISHA: Yeah, I'm not consenting to any of that.

MATT: Caleb, did you cast Identify?

LIAM: Ja, on Beauregard's hand.

MATT: Right. As soon as you release the spell, usually what it does is it gives this faint coloration based on the aura and the structure of the school of magic that might've enchanted the object scenario. You release the spell and in a brief second, akin to when Gandalf reaches for the ring, you see the red eye for a second and that's it. No information. You just have a flashback to the dream you just had and nothing more.

LIAM: Okay. So that's not going to work.

TRAVIS: What's not going to work?

LIAM: I tried to understand what it is. Your cuticles are a mess, by the way.

MARISHA: I'm in the fucking tundra. Fuck you, man.

LIAM: You moisturize?

ASHLEY: Do you?

LAURA: Is this what the eyes do? Makes you see every little detail about that person?

LIAM: I already had that.

MARISHA: So what did you see other than, like, busted-ass cuticles?

LIAM: I saw the big eye from your dream for a split second. Waiting for the other shoe to drop here.

MARISHA: You think we'll be able to get sleep again, ever?

LIAM: That's interesting.

LAURA: Oh no, that's why he doesn't sleep. He probably sees it all the time.

SAM: Well, we should go back to sleep and finish our long rest, anyway. Tomorrow won't be a problem for Caleb, but, Beau, do you think maybe you should wrap that thing up?

MARISHA: I don't want him to know at all.

LAURA: What if-- he probably already knows. He's probably aware it's happened.

MARISHA: He absolutely knows.

TALIESIN: He probably can see through it.

MARISHA: Oh, my-- shit. You're right. No, that's confirmed because we've seen that with the others, right? That he can see through these eyes.

LAURA: He can? He can see through them? Oh my god. What if he tries to take control of them and he takes control of you two as well?

TRAVIS: I don't know if he sees through those eyes or if something is seeing through those eyes.


SAM: Well, what if you guys start speaking in unison in that creepy way that he does sometimes?

LIAM: It'll never happen.

MARISHA: What am I thinking right now?

LIAM: You want to hit me in the nose.

MARISHA: No. I was thinking about waffles.

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: Now I kind of want to hit you in the nose. Yeah, waffles sounds great. Yeah.

LIAM: (bell dinging)

MATT: (meows)

TALIESIN: Get some sleep.

LIAM: Gisela, go up and get-- bring down two plates of waffles.

MATT: (meows affirmatively)

SAM: Beauregard, if you need a glove, I have some gloves that you could borrow. Do you have some?

MARISHA: I've got gloves, yeah. I've got my bracers, my wraps because, you know, I got to protect the wrists so I do the wraps. Then I do the bracers, and then I do my lightning gloves on top. So I'm covered.

SAM: Oh, does it gets sweaty?

MARISHA: Yeah. You should smell it. Do you want to smell the gloves?

LAURA: I could smell her hands when I was painting her nails.

MATT: Smell the Glove. Great album.

SAM: That's pretty rank.


TALIESIN: We should sleep.

TRAVIS: (exhales)

LAURA: Cats.


MATT: (meows) They come back with waffles.

TRAVIS: Ah! (laughter)

LAURA: Oh no.


LAURA: If you guys-- Oh no. How are you going to sleep?

TRAVIS: It's going to be great.

MARISHA: Maybe-- Maybe this is a good thing.

SAM: Yeah? Go on.

MARISHA: Maybe we'll get a little bit more inside information as we get into this and we'll have a little bit...

LIAM: Yeah, we get closer to our enemies and if we go too far, it is up to you all to keep us from going over the edge.

LAURA: What if every time you go to sleep you get another eyeball?

TRAVIS: Oh shit. (laughs) That would be fucked. I'm loving this. Oh man.

TALIESIN: It's technically not a full rest yet, either.

LIAM: Well, we just have to wait and see.

TRAVIS: Never sleep again.

LIAM: I'm going to go to sleep, is what I'm going to do.

TRAVIS: It's still my watch, right?

MATT: Yeah. It's almost over.

TALIESIN: Back to sleep.

MARISHA: I'm going to go to sleep, but I'm going to sleep with a pencil in hand on an open page of my notebook.

MATT: Actually, it was your first watch. It would be a little earlier in the morning then because we never quite finished your first watch.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I know I was the last.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: All right.

TRAVIS: Sweet dreams.

MARISHA: Beat me to it.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: I'll try to go back to sleep.

LAURA: I'll take second watch.

MATT: All right. Who's taking third?

ASHLEY: I'll take third.

MATT: Okay. Roll perception check for second watch. Your watch finishes without issue.

LAURA: Without--

MATT: Additional issues.

TRAVIS: I was going to say, according to what?

LIAM: What did you do, Travis? What did you do?


LAURA: Eight.

MATT: Eight. Okay.

TRAVIS: Not enough.

MATT: Nothing catches your attention. You push through the boredom and then eventually finish your watch.

LAURA: (tongue lolling) (snoring)

MATT: You're taking the last watch, you said?

ASHLEY: I'll take the last watch.

MATT: Go ahead and roll a perception check for me.

TRAVIS: Come on, Yasha.


TRAVIS: It comes down to you.


LIAM: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: (laughs)

MARISHA: Oh boy. Oh no. (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's a special angle.

ASHLEY: It's a very special angle.

LIAM: It's a good color, too. It just, like, draws your eyes.

TRAVIS: Just like in Tossman's, man. (laughter)

MATT: I'm just glad other people are getting in the beam of focus now. Years of this shit, I'm just like, "Yeah. Yeah, how's it feel?"

ASHLEY: Yeah, 16.

MATT: 16. Other than some general restlessness--

ASHLEY: Sorry, 15.

MATT: 15. Oh, well, that changes everything.

ASHLEY: Well, I figured.

MATT: No, good. No, your watch finishes without issue. You do manage to finish a full night's sleep. You both as well, though not the most restful, given the circumstances in which you had to force yourselves back into a semblance of slumber. No continuation of the dream. You do manage to complete a long rest and all of you come to consciousness.

MARISHA: Oh, okay.

MATT: A little tense, but rested.

LIAM: And everyone except for Veth and Caleb have the one point of exhaustion, right?

MATT: Correct.


SAM: No, not Beau.

TALIESIN: Did a-- cast a spell, restoration.

MATT: That's true. Yeah. You would not get--

MARISHA: Wasn't a total waste. That's good.

TALIESIN: [inaudible]. This is so scary.

MATT: No, I mean, you always need one.

ASHLEY: We have one level of exhaustion? Okay.

LAURA: I always forget where it's at.

TRAVIS: It's under--

SAM: Conditions.

MARISHA: At the very bottom.

TRAVIS: Right under your hit points.

TALIESIN: Mine's at the top right, by hit points.

ASHLEY: By armor class?

LAURA: Oh, conditions. Yes, yes, yes.

SAM: Really?

ASHLEY: Any dreams? Anything? You're okay?

MARISHA: Not a lot of sleep, but not a lot of dreams either.

TALIESIN: No new eyes?

LAURA: I know. I'm looking at the back of Caleb's neck.

MARISHA: Anything new?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: Oh, holy shit. Come on.

LAURA: I'm looking at his hands and the back of his neck, all the places.

MATT: Perception check.

TRAVIS: What if it's a fucking timer? We got to move fast, I bet.

MARISHA: 11, it's not good.

MATT: You don't see any changes or additions.

LAURA: 16.

TALIESIN: Check your back really quickly, if that's okay.

LAURA: 16.

MATT: 16? You don't see anything different beyond what you were shown in the middle of the evening.

TRAVIS: Check his scalp, like a--

TALIESIN: Looks fine.

MATT: No difference?

TRAVIS: What about the roof of his mouth? Check his taint. (laughter)

LAURA: I'm nervous every time. Maybe you have to look at the book again.

LIAM: We've known each other for a long time, all of us. (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's what friends do. Show me! (laughter)

LIAM: Show me what you got! (laughter)


TRAVIS: Sun it for a little bit.

TALIESIN: Just for-- what do you say? Get rid of the eyes or close down the--?

LAURA: We can try again today for different things. I would still, again, try to bring Molly back into the body.

SAM: This is Divine Intervention?

LAURA: I mean, if I'm going to ask for something I'm going to ask for something amazing.

TALIESIN: Well, I will say that the way, at least, the magic works for me is, it's got to be a conceivable way for it to happen. You can't quite--

LAURA: Oh, really?

TALIESIN: Yeah. It's not a wish.

TALIESIN: It's more of a...

LAURA: That you got to be able to do it? So it's something that Artagan actually has to be able to do?

TALIESIN: It can be impressive, but-- So there's an entire possibility that could try and remove the eyes and it could not work.

LAURA: Okay. Okay.

TRAVIS: Are you going to do it?

TALIESIN: Temple or eyes?

LAURA: I'm going to try to get him to immediately bamf us to Essek.

TRAVIS: Yeah? Is that what we want to do?

LAURA: (laughs) That's what I want to do.

TALIESIN: We don't know if-- will divine teleportation be a problem?

LAURA: What? Is that bad?

LIAM: Well, we talked about either murdering them now--

SAM: Or staying with them.

LIAM: 'Til morning. Or staying with them to the very end. And if we go to Essek now they could skedaddle right off of this mortal coil to their destination.

LAURA: Oh, you're right.

LIAM: What about you reverse that?

LAURA: Bring Essek here?

SAM: Bring Essek to us.

LAURA: Right away?

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: Well, I'd rather that than the opposite. I don't want to lose them.

SAM: Yeah. That makes sense. That makes a lot of sense.

TALIESIN: I'm going to go for closing the site, the secret entrance.

SAM: Cool.

TALIESIN: See what that does. Nope.

LAURA: I'm going to go for trying to make all of their relics disappear immediately.

SAM: Their relics?

MARISHA: That's kind of cool.

LAURA: All of their threshold crests, all of the things they need. I want the Traveler to steal them all.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I like that.

LAURA: Nope. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It's good to remember that we can do this, though.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Is it once a day?

LAURA: Every day we can try for something really stupid.

TALIESIN: Until it works.

LIAM: Right.

TALIESIN: And then you have to take a week off.

LIAM: Got it. Cool.

LAURA: But hey, if you're listening, you know, you could try that anytime you want. You could try it.

TRAVIS: Who are you talking to?

LAURA: I'm talking to the Traveler.

TRAVIS: Oh, right, yep. You mean Artagan?

LAURA: Yeah.


LIAM: We're going to have to face the music at some point. Should I invite them to breakfast?

SAM: Yes.

TALIESIN: I think it's time for waffles.

LAURA: Sure.

LIAM: Okay. Pull out a copper wire and will deliver to Lucien: You might be able to hear me without this, but breakfast will be in 20 minutes.

MATT: Brief moment and then a response. "All right, then. See you there."

TRAVIS: I, for one, am very excited. This is unexpected development.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: We're just acting like everything's fine, yeah?


LIAM: Well, ja.

LAURA: You're not going to look at the book anymore, right? Caleb, you can't look at the book anymore.

TRAVIS: Ooh boy, that seems like a given, but--

LIAM: Yeah, that makes sense.

LAURA: Caleb, you'll get possessed.

TALIESIN: That's a maybe.

LIAM: Not necessarily, but I don't have to look at the book. I don't have to look at the book.

ASHLEY: Yeah, but what if it gives you more information?

LIAM: This is the razor's edge one can walk on. Stay away from it completely--

ASHLEY: What if we all just looked at it a little bit?

LIAM: -- or get even closer?

TRAVIS: (laughs) We just tank the whole campaign right here. Let's all go ahead.

ASHLEY: We can all just look at it for a little bit amount of time and then we would have information. It's a bad idea. It's a bad idea. I know it's a bad idea, so I'm not going to continue.

TRAVIS: What if it's, like, a slowly spreading disease and as we rest tonight, there will be another eye, and then another?

LIAM: I would say--

TALIESIN: Then you re-read the book.

LIAM: -- for now--

ASHLEY: Yeah. Then you would read the book because you--

LIAM: -- we do nothing.

LIAM: We just give it 24 hours, we sleep on it.

TRAVIS: I am here for that plan.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

LIAM: Do you think?

MARISHA: Yeah. I'm glad we're in this together. For better or for worse.

LIAM: We said we would keep each other in check.

MARISHA: I think that's about-- Yep, I think that's about to be the thing.

LIAM: Yeah. Look at this. Hold your fist up.

MARISHA: Which one?

LIAM: The one.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: I yank down my clothes and I stand next to her, and make two eyes look around. (laughter)


MARISHA: Wait, wait, wait, cross eyes, cross eyes. Yeah. (laughs)

LIAM: Okay, that's actually pretty good. I'm going to draw it in my sketchbook.

TRAVIS: I'm going down to breakfast.

SAM: I'm coming.

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah.

MATT: All right, you guys go and make your way down to breakfast. You can see the Tomb Takers are already there, and have begun diving into their meal. As you all step into the chamber and take your places around the long table, Lucien, halfway into chewing, looks up slightly and goes, "Everyone sleep well?"

LAURA: (groaning)

MARISHA: This guy.

TALIESIN: Middly. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Wondrous world. Down!

MATT: "Good, good, we're so close today. Just a bit more travel, we'll be there."

TRAVIS: What do you think, a day more, less?

LIAM: End of the day or tomorrow?

MATT: "Early tomorrow, should we not run into more terrible weather."

TRAVIS: Nott. Veth.

ASHLEY: Did you sleep okay?

LAURA: Yeah, did you have kitty dreams? Because sometimes when I roam, I have dreams like a cat afterwards.

MATT: "I had some nice dreams, not too bad. Some good decor. Some fun stories around it. Anyway, come, eat."

TRAVIS: Om nom nom nom.

MATT: So you guys have your breakfast.

SAM and ASHLEY: (eating noises)

MATT: Unless you have anything else to discuss, you can go ahead and pick up your things and prepare for your hopefully final day's journey on to the ruins.

SAM: All right, Ashley Johnson.

TALIESIN: I believe in you.

ASHLEY: I'm the roll?

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.

LIAM: Bring that wisdom save power.

TRAVIS: Let's go.

ASHLEY: What am I adding?

MATT: Nothing.

ASHLEY: Just as-is?

MATT: Yeah.


SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Did you roll a 10?

LIAM: A 10 was a storm.

SAM: 10 was bad.

LIAM: Yeah, 10 was bad.

SAM: I think we have eights that are bad.

MATT: Roll another d8 for me, please.

TALIESIN: Oh, I'm into it.

SAM: That's no good.


TRAVIS: Encyclopedia Brown.

ASHLEY: Use these new ones, I think this is an eight. Eight.

MATT: You rolled an eight?


TALIESIN: Oh, oh no.

TRAVIS: Please, I'm so happy.

ASHLEY: Oh no, what'd I do?

SAM: And so ends the story of the Mighty-- (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh no.

MATT: The day is clear. The weather is fine. The storm has blown past and you can see the blue sky now taking most of the air above you. The gray and dark snow seems to be pushing further to the west-northwest. With that, you gather your things, continue trekking onward. About four--

ASHLEY: Oh boy.

MATT: -- five hours into the journey, you hear this sound, this, (grunting) (whimpering). And you glance over in the direction you can see there's a pack of about seven wolves, running to a northern direction.

TRAVIS and LAURA: Away from something?


MATT: They're running just a northern direction.

TRAVIS: Across our path.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: What's behind them? What's running--

MATT: Roll a perception check.

TRAVIS: I'll assist you.

TALIESIN: Can I join in that?

MATT: You can as well.

LAURA: Ooh, two very good rolls there.

LIAM: Doing the cake.

LAURA: 20, I can add, five plus 18 is 23.

MATT: 23, okay.


LAURA: Ooh, wow.

MATT: As you guys follow that for a second, you're like, "Where are they rushing from?" And you glance up in the sky and you see this like glint in the air.

TALIESIN: I tap Lucien and point.

TRAVIS: Did we deal with rocs out here?

MATT: "You've got to be kidding me."

MARISHA: "You got to be kidding me," that what he just said?

MATT: (wings flapping)

LAURA: Is he smiling? Is he smiling, what is it?

LIAM: A roc.

LAURA: Is it a dragon?

MATT: You see, running in your direction loosely the beating wings of a massive white dragon.

SAM: What?!

TRAVIS: Get the fuck out of here!

LAURA: A fucking dragon!

SAM: What?

MATT: What are you doing?

MARISHA: You rolled a dragon into existence?

ASHLEY: I rolled a dragon. (laughter)

MARISHA: What did you do?!

ASHLEY: I'm sorry!

MATT: What are you doing, what are you doing?

LAURA: How far away are we from the tower, really far?

MATT: It's hard to see it at this distance, like gauging, because it's just blue sky and this shape. It's small, but it's coming quick. What are you doing?

LAURA: We bury down in the snow.

SAM: Yes, yes.

MARISHA: Are there some snowbanks or is there any outcroppings?

MATT: Oh, no, it's a fresh snow overnight So there's snowbanks, definitely.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, we'll shimmy down.

SAM: How far did we get from the house? Can we just run back into the house?

LAURA: That's what I'm saying. Is the tower close by?

MATT: You guys have been traveling for four to five hours.

SAM: Oh, fuck you.

MATT: And it only lasts for--

LAURA: 24 hours.

MATT: 24, it does last 24 hours.

TRAVIS: I can do Marine Layer but I think they have-- they can see through anything, right?

SAM: True sight, yeah, so we should just bury ourselves in the snow.

LAURA: Do the shimmy, shimmy down.

ASHLEY: Start, yeah.

SAM: Shimmy shimmy shimmy.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I start wiggling, you know, like.

SAM: Do we have any Dust of whatever, or--?

TRAVIS: We don't have that shit in this campaign!

TALIESIN: Stealth.

LAURA: What?

TALIESIN: Stealth.

LAURA: And Pass Without a Trace.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Do that.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right. So Pass without a Trace.

LAURA: I know I did two of those.

SAM: Can Pass without a Trace work on all of us?

LAURA: I'm looking, I'm looking, hold on.

MARISHA: I think we have to be within 30 feet of Jester.

MATT: You all have to be within 30 feet and is it anyone, a number?

LAURA: I'm looking, I'm looking, I don't know why it's not up. I thought it was a 3rd--

MATT: Okay, Pass Without a Trace.

LAURA: I always have it.

MATT: "Each creature you choose within 30 feet of you."

SAM: Wow.

LAURA: Okay, so yeah, anybody. Everybody.

SAM: Lucien, Tomb Takers, get close.

MATT: "Right." They all push inward. You guys all dive beneath the snowbank near this portion of rock that is pressed up out of the way where it's pushing the snow. As you guys all carefully get in there, I need everyone to make a stealth check.

LAURA: Oh, it's a 2nd.


LIAM: That's a two, I rolled a two. Oh no, I didn't.

TRAVIS: Plus ten, right?

LAURA: Plus ten.

LIAM: Seven.

MARISHA: Super glad.


LIAM: It's hard to read this die.

LAURA: What am I going to roll? What am I rolling? Okay.

MATT: This is plus 10 from you, right?

LAURA: Yes. (whistling)

SAM: Did we tangle with a white dragon already?

LIAM: Yeah, Gelidon.


LAURA: (gasps)

SAM: Is this the same one? It's got to be.

MATT: What you got?

LAURA: I mean, we are in the same area.

MARISHA: Yeah, we are. In the icy--

LAURA: Oh my god, this could be him.

MARISHA: Yeah, 100%.


MATT: 13, with the plus 10?

MARISHA: 100%.

SAM: Oh, that's rough.

MARISHA: Huh? You want to fight him?

LAURA: Thank god for the plus 10.

TRAVIS: I rolled a three.

MARISHA: It's an ancient white dragon.

LAURA: 34.

MATT: 13 to a 34.

LIAM: Wow.

MATT: All righty.

LIAM: 19.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: 42. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Jeez Louise.

TRAVIS: Is that the highest roll we've ever had, 42?

ASHLEY: Probably, how-- how?

SAM: Because I got a plus 10.

LAURA: Rogues, man.

LIAM: Rogues.

ASHLEY: Natural 20.

ALL: Ooh.

MATT: Plus?

ASHLEY: With the new, plus two, three, 33 total.

SAM: You unlocked the advantage within.

MATT: Because of the natural 20 that's two in your favor. Caduceus?


MATT: 22.

ASHLEY: We made crit happen. No, but this is not a crit.

MATT: Okay.


MATT: 26, that was-- Okay. You beat me to what I was going to say. I was going to say, you guys have, up until Beauregard, an even number of successes and failures--

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: -- across you and the Tomb Takers. And then Beauregard is the deciding element. So as you all sit there quietly, (heavy impact) You hear this impact and scraping sound. It's not super nearby, maybe a couple hundred feet away. (stomping) (sniffing) "I can smell you."

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: "I told you I had your scent."

TRAVIS: (whispers) Shit. What did you fucking do?

LAURA: Do you remember? No, we fucked up.

TRAVIS: I know!

LAURA: Oh man, we pissed him off so bad.

ASHLEY: Wait, how can he smell us?

MARISHA: We've met before.

ASHLEY: Have I met him before?

MARISHA: I don't think you were there.

TRAVIS: We should move. We're all bunched up, we should move.

MATT: You hear this heavy smashing swing sound and a bunch of snow just gets (whoosh) thrown up into the air causing this brief snow blind state.

MARISHA: Aw, shit.

MATT: And then it all comes to rest as you can see she's sweeping her tail through the snow banks around.

SAM: Oh god.

TRAVIS: We got to move.

MATT: Rocks and shit are (whoosh)

LAURA: How are we going to move? Where are we going to go?

LIAM: We're visible probably.

TRAVIS: You guys.

MARISHA: We're fighting this thing, aren't we?

TRAVIS: Yeah, you got to move.

SAM: Wait, ooh, maybe Lucien can kill it.

TRAVIS: I'll kick us off.

LIAM: Yeah, we've got two adventuring parties here.

LAURA: Oh my god.

ASHLEY: We got to move?

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, move or you die.

MARISHA: Are we running or are we fighting?

TRAVIS: It's a fight, it is a fight.


TRAVIS: Move or you die.

MATT: It's whatever you guys want to do.

LIAM: We're not going to outrun--


MARISHA: Yeah, we can't run in this snow.

LIAM: We're in a field.

LAURA: Can we see how close?

MATT: Make a perception check with disadvantage because you guys are buried in snow and you're trying to peek though.

LAURA: Oh, a natural 20 and 12. No. 13.

MATT: 13, you're not able to get an angle. You're hidden.

TALIESIN: Is that with 10?


TALIESIN: Is that with the 10?

LAURA: That was a perception check.

TALIESIN: Oh, perception.

MATT: It's hard to tell. A couple of hundred feet off is what you're guessing.

LAURA: Couple hundred feet off is still pretty far, but they know that we're here, she knows.

MARISHA: Yeah, if she knows we're here.

MATT: (sniffing) "Where are you?" (sniffing)

TRAVIS: Fuck it, I'm randy. I'm going to cast Fly on myself.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: And I'm going to move (whooshing) away from where everybody is in the ground.

MATT: Really?


MATT: All right. Fjord just takes off at what speed?

TRAVIS: 60 feet.

MATT: 60 feet.

SAM: ♪ (vocalizes the background music) ♪

LAURA: Okay, so we're doing this.


TRAVIS: You guys are in analysis paralysis. This is happening.

MARISHA: Lord have mercy.

SAM: Fjord have mercy.

TRAVIS: One Cone of Cold over in that ground where everybody's laying within 30 feet of each other, we're all hurting.

LIAM: Yeah, I'll say once Fjord pops the bottle, Caleb will use those boots and start flying at a different angle.

MARISHA: Yeah, if we're doing this, I'll bolt in an opposite direction.

LIAM: Holy shit.

TRAVIS: Let's go, let's go.


MARISHA: All spread.

MATT: Okay, I'm bringing up the--

LIAM: Bring out that dragon. That bad dragon.

MARISHA: So, let's see.

ASHLEY: I'll say-- you know.

MARISHA: We super pissed it off.

ASHLEY: Thought we needed a lil spice for today.

LIAM: Literally true.

TRAVIS: What's that?

LIAM: It's literally true. (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Did not write.

ASHLEY: ♪ (vocalizes the previous background music) ♪

SAM: We've faced this thing before.

LIAM: Yeah.


TRAVIS: And ran.

LAURA: Stood in a bubble and screamed.

LIAM: We ain't got time to make that bubble. That's a minute.

MATT: So you dart off out of the snow. You guys see Fjord just take off like a bullet out of the space.

TRAVIS: I'll break to the right.

MATT: Off of the right. Then you hear immediately, (snarling) "There!" (whooshing)


MATT: And the wings start taking off in Fjord's direction.

SAM: As soon as I hear those wings whooshing, I'm going to pop out from hiding and fire. How far away?

TRAVIS: Hundred feet.

SAM: I'm going to fire. Okay.

TRAVIS: Is that right, hundred feet?

MATT: All right, so you're firing at the dragon?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: All right. You pop out and go to shoot.

SAM: Please work. Okay. It's a strong roll. 27 to hit.

MATT: That does hit.

SAM: I should have said this before I fired. Sorry, I have the page up. I want to use a cataclysm bolt.

MATT: Okay, okay.

SAM: I don't know what that will do. I don't know. Never used one before.

LAURA: What's a cataclysm bolt?!

SAM: I found three of them. I'm using one.

MATT: They're in D&D Beyond, if you look them up.

SAM: No, no, I've got it but I had to roll--

MATT: You have to roll to see what it does.

SAM: -- what it does, right? Yeah, so first can I roll for damage and stuff?

MATT: Yes, you do.

SAM: Okay.

LIAM: Also, DM, I've already called it.

TALIESIN: You've done this to us.

LIAM: Caleb is Stormrider Booting in an opposite angle from Fjord.

MATT: Okay, you got it. I'm going to go ahead, after Sam's roll here, put down a battlefield because this is now become a battle.

SAM: Oh boy.

LIAM: Oh my goodness. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

LAURA: It could have not been a battle.

LIAM: Could've.

TRAVIS: No, it was a battle.

LIAM: We have two adventuring parties.

TRAVIS: Totally, we have numbers. He was smelling, there's nowhere to run.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It's a fight and we were bunched up in the snow.

SAM: That's 34 points.

MATT: 34 points, all right.

SAM: And then the cataclysm bolt--

MATT: Yes.

SAM: -- is--

LIAM: Good leader move, good job, Fjord.

SAM: Are you fucking kidding me? The bolt freezes around the target to cause ice damage. Fuck you! (laughter)

LIAM: Oh man, you need to--

MATT: Yeah, it's immunity to cold.

TRAVIS: Oh no. Oh no!

MATT: But you still do the original damage from the impact.

LIAM: Wow.

LAURA: And you did sneak attack, right?

SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Oh no, wait, no I don't get a bonus action. This is a sneak attack round.

MATT: Yeah, this is just jump out. So I'll be right back.

SAM: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, guys.

LAURA: Oh jeez.

MARISHA: I found my notes for Gelidon. I wrote fucking nothing.

SAM: This combat is brought to you by Dwarven Forge and by Fjord's horniness for battle. (laughter)

SAM: Dwarven Forge is having a restock soon. Join the email list--

ALL: Ooh!

SAM: -- to be alerted when your long-awaited sets have returned or email

MATT: You guys are hiding over here-ish. I'm just going to start throwing you in since that was the nature of everyone's quick process of leaping out and taking care of their business here.

LAURA: Am I taking care of--

SAM: Taking care of business. We're all dropping deuces in the snow.

LIAM: Yep, yep.

SAM: (blows raspberry)

LIAM: Motherf--

MATT: All right, and then we have--

MARISHA: Oh god.

MATT: Hidden over here.

SAM: ♪ (vocalizes the background music) ♪

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: It was on you. It was on all of us.

LIAM: Good job, Ashley.

LAURA: Oh my-- we're so clumped.


ASHLEY: I do my best.

TRAVIS: He'd just take two steps, be closer and we'd be--

MATT: Now Fjord, you took off this direction, you said?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I went to the right, trying to draw his-- if he was looking at 12 o'clock in our direction or slightly off, I just want him to turn 45 degrees. So radial out.

MATT: And at fly speed, action to cast it, and then 60, so you would be--

LIAM: Holy smokes.

MATT: You would be right about here-ish.

TRAVIS: And what direction is he in?

MATT: She--

TRAVIS: She, thank you. Gelidon, did we know that?

ASHLEY: Gelidon?

MATT: -- is about there.

ASHLEY: Gelidon, she's a big girl.

LAURA: Jeez.

SAM: Jeez.


MATT: She's an ancient white dragon.

LAURA: She's an ancient white dragon.

MARISHA: She's an ancient?

LAURA: She's an ancient-- she's Vorugal's--

LIAM: Vorugal level.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: And we have no goristro, no demon popping in here.

MARISHA: No plan. We had a plan.

SAM: We have a Lucien, we have two extra eyes.

MARISHA: Last time.

LIAM and SAM: Yep.

ASHLEY: Oh god.

MATT: So I would like everyone to roll initiative, please. (laughter) (groaning)


SAM: ♪ (vocalizes the background music) ♪

LIAM: Roll my wizard hat.

SAM: Oh.

LIAM: Ugh.


SAM: We're okay.


LIAM: That's terrible.


LAURA: I don't even want this number.

LIAM: Are you high?


LIAM: Yep. Hate that spot. That's for Beauregard.

LAURA: That's not for the cleric.

TRAVIS: (sharp breath)

TALIESIN: I didn't have time to cast a fucking spell.

MARISHA: No, we're--

MATT: 25 to 20.

SAM: 25!

TRAVIS: Let's go!

MATT: All right.


LAURA: 20.

ASHLEY: 21 for me. (cheering)

MATT: Veth then Yasha. Then Jester.

MARISHA: Beau then Jester, I think.

TRAVIS: Beau then Jester, yeah.

MATT: I'm sorry, yeah, Beau then Jester.

LAURA: Unless we want to do a--

MARISHA: Tag team?

LAURA: Yeah, a move.

MARISHA: Yeah. A fastball special?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: I could fastball special us.

MARISHA: And get in--

MATT: 20 to 15.

TRAVIS: (chuckles) Cool.

LIAM: Oh boy.

MATT: 15 to 10.



LAURA: (whispering) I could bamf us.

TALIESIN: Crickets, crickets.

MARISHA: (whispering) And get on him? That's cool.

TALIESIN: This is so bad.

LAURA: On to--

MATT: 10 to five?


SAM: Oh. That's actually good. That's a good place for you.


SAM: Yeah, that's where we want you.

LIAM: Also, Caleb is not with the group.

LAURA: Where are you, what did you do?

LIAM: He'll probably be on that-- He would have taken the V direction away from Fjord.

MATT: So you are up.

LIAM: I would be on the side of the map.

MATT: 60 feet, right?

LIAM: Mm-hm.

MATT: Yeah, you are over here. Sure. All righty.

SAM: What is that shirt?

MATT: So now-- hmm? This here?

SAM: I love it.

MATT: Yeah, it's from Into the Mother Lands. So top of the initiative round, we have Veth followed by Yasha. Veth, what are you doing?

SAM: Same thing again.

LIAM: Holy cow, I'm running to the bathroom.

MATT: All right.

SAM: I'm going to bonus action--

TRAVIS: (giggles)

SAM: Bonus action, Voltaic Bolt.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Juice up the old bolt. And then I will aim and fire again.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Not as good, not as good, not as good. not as good, not as good. That's a 20.

MATT: That's a 20? That just hits.

SAM: Ooh!

MARISHA: 20 just hits.

SAM: Oh, but no sneak attack this time.

MATT: Correct, because you're not hidden.

SAM: Balls! Balls and anus. Shit.

SAM: Well, I'll just do that damage then. I guess it's 1d6. Ooh, okay, 11 points plus the spell, which is three more d6.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Ooh, another 13.

MATT: Another 13, you got it.

SAM: So wait, what did I say on the first one? It was--? What was it?

TRAVIS: 20 just hits.

SAM: No, no, no, I rolled a-- Shit. What did I just roll?

LAURA: I wasn't paying attention.

SAM: I think it was 20. It was 13 plus whatever I said at the beginning which was another 10? No, fuck! I've forgotten what I rolled!

MATT: You just told me 13 damage at one point.

SAM: No, there was another roll before that,

TALIESIN: Like 11 or something?

SAM: Yeah, yeah, that's what it was. It was 11 plus 13. Thank you, thank you.

TALIESIN: I have no idea how that happened.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Yeah, I know. I'm looking at spells.

SAM: And I guess I'll move.

MATT: Where you want to move?

SAM: Straight down the line of that ice bridge.

MATT: Right here?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: You got a plan?


SAM: If I can get behind it, that would be cool.

MATT: Speed of 30?

SAM: 30.

MATT: 30, you can't quite get to it.

SAM: Cool, that's good.

MATT: All righty, that finishes that. Yasha, you're up. Beau, you're on deck.

ASHLEY: Okay, I poof out of... the snow.

MATT: You're right there.

ASHLEY: Yes, and as I do and see her, I will let out a battle cry, which gives everyone advantage on attack rolls and saving throws.

TRAVIS: What's it sound like?

ASHLEY: (lightly grunts) (laughter)

TRAVIS: Like a dry fart, I like it. (pah)

ASHLEY: I'm trying to be quiet so she doesn't know where I am.

MATT: Everyone within what distance to you?

MARISHA: (whispering) Let me make sure.

ASHLEY: 60 feet, up to 10 other creatures of your choice.

MATT: Okay. Fjord, you would just barely be in range.


LAURA: Sweet.

MATT: So yeah, that's everybody.

TRAVIS: Thank you.

MATT: Up to how many creatures?


MATT: 10, okay, so that's all of you seven, plus three of them, of the Tomb Takers if you want to.

TALIESIN: Or 10 others or 10 creatures?

ASHLEY: 10 creatures, 10 creatures total.

TRAVIS: And what does it give us?

ASHLEY: Advantage on attack rolls and saving throws.


LAURA: That's great.

TALIESIN: (sigh)

LIAM: Attack rolls and saving throws.

SAM: That's amazing.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Is that your battle cry?

ASHLEY: That's the battle cry.

TRAVIS: For one turn?

ASHLEY: For one turn.


ASHLEY: Do we want to help out the others?

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Let's do Lucien. Who else is there? Otis, Tyffial--

SAM: Cree.

ASHLEY: Let's do Cree and... one more. Tyffial, Tyffial.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

ASHLEY: Okay, and then as a bonus action, I would like to rage.

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: And then-- oh no, wait, Zealous Presence is a bonus action. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: So you would not be able to rage necessarily at the moment.

ASHLEY: Okay, and then... Ah shit, I should've raged first. (pop)

TALIESIN: You can still-- you can burn your action to rage if you have to.

LAURA: Can you?

TALIESIN: Yeah, it's a bonus action you can just, you can use anything greater. It's action, movement, bonus action. So you can burn your movement or your action for bonus action, and you can burn your action for movement.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

TALIESIN: If you like.

ASHLEY: Yeah, (clears throat) I'll do that. I'll do that. So I'm going to rage and--

MATT: Instead of the shout, you mean?

ASHLEY: No, as a...

LAURA: Action?

ASHLEY: As an action. Can I do that?

MATT: It doesn't-- you can't transfer necessarily a bonus action into an action.

TALIESIN: Oh, you can't?

MATT: No, that's a Pathfinder thing.

TALIESIN: Oh, okay, never mind.

ASHLEY: That's why it's kind of familiar. Okay, so, what I'll do then is... This is dumb. I'm going to run up to...

TRAVIS: Best plans always are.

ASHLEY: I'm going to run up to it.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Can I get all the way?

MATT: 40, 45, 50?

ASHLEY: Oh, no, I can't. Okay, so I'll stay behind that...

SAM: Snowbank?

ASHLEY: Snowbank.

MATT: Right there?


MATT: You've got it.


MATT: Okay, that finishes your turn, Yasha. Beau, then Jester's on deck.

LAURA: Beau?

MARISHA: Okay, I am going to-- let me make sure-- (mumbling) At the start of my turn. So at the start of my turn, I am going to go ahead and activate my Maelstrom Gloves.

MATT: (whoosh) Sparks (boom) shoot through your fists.

LAURA: And at the same time--

MARISHA: And then I look at Jess.

LAURA: Since we're both going at the same time, I'm going to grab her hand and I'm going to--

MARISHA: Here we go.

LAURA: -- Dimension Door us onto the back of the dragon.

SAM: Yes.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Oh, let's go, ladies!

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Dimension Dooring to a dragon? That sounds like a terrible idea.

TRAVIS: That's what I'm talking about!

LAURA: -- not in the dragon.

TRAVIS: That's what I'm talking about.

MARISHA: Let's go.

LIAM: It's that one spot on her back that she can never quite--


LIAM: -- scratch.

TRAVIS: First step's always the hardest, then you just go with it.

TALIESIN: Have you seen weightlifters mess with each other by putting a sign on their back. Because they're all so muscly, they can't--

MATT: There you go! So you both (whoosh) vanish and then (whoosh) onto the back of the dragon right as its wings are about to kick up. And as you both land you see the head turn to the side and you just catch the edge of the light blue cold eye look back over the shoulder at you both. What are you doing?

MARISHA: So as we poof out of the Dimension Door I'm going to swing my staff above overhead and just come down out of the portal with a big slap to its head.

MATT: You got it. Go for it.

MARISHA: A-pop pop with the staff. Ooh, one of those is a natural one. Super bad. Yeah, there's a 20 total.

MATT: Okay, natural one misses 20 total just hits.

MARISHA: Okay, so one hit there. Ugh, weak damage. Nine damage with my staff.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: I don't expect this thing to have low constitution.

MATT: It's going to use a legendary save to save.



TALIESIN: That's great.

MATT: It rolled a natural one. (laughter)


MATT: Yeah, so used the save.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, we're chalking 'em off.

MARISHA: Yeah, we're chalking, yeah that's something.

TALIESIN: Already knocked one out, way to go.

MARISHA: Okay. Bonus action, pop pop.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: That's a d12, get outta here. Okay, that's a natural 19 on my first one for 29 total.

MATT: 29 total, that hits.

MARISHA: And then the other one I'm pretty sure misses with... 16.

MATT: 16 misses. (panting)

MARISHA: And that's-- okay, another nine damage.

MATT: Another nine damage, you got it.

MARISHA: First off, Extract Aspects.

MATT: All righty. Which means it is marked by you as analyzed. And it is... immune to cold damage.

MARISHA: That's it?

MATT: That's it.

MARISHA: Okay, yep.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay.

MARISHA: Immune to cold.

SAM: We can work with that.

MARISHA: Immune to cold, everybody.

TALIESIN: Just normal, is everything else?

MARISHA: And then--

MATT: Seems to be.

MARISHA: -- Stunning Strike again with that last pop pop.

MATT: Okay, that does succeed. 30.


MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Great, good. That's my turn, I think.

SAM: That's a lot.

MATT: And Jester, anything else in your turn or is that--

LAURA: For my bonus, I'm going to just-- are there any spikes sticking out of the back or anything?

MATT: I mean, there are heavier scales. There aren't any giant spikes or anything. You can grab onto scale elements and parts of the skin. But that's what you got.

LAURA: What about the wing? Is that a good thing to hold onto?

MATT: You can certainly try.

LAURA: I want to use my bonus action to try to grab on and get as much of a hold, so it doesn't throw me off its back, as possible.

MATT: Sure, okay, you do your best to grab ahold. That finishes your guys' turns?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: End of your turn, it's going to go ahead and use two of its legendary actions to do its wing attack where it begins to beat its wings. You watch it-- (whooshing) start swinging its wings causing all this wind and snow begin to swirl around it. All the rest of you watch as suddenly you can't see it. It's just caught in this giant torrent of air and soft powder snow that's been kicked up around it. You both are being battered with it. Your skin is starting to just freeze on impact. I need both of you--

SAM: Uh-oh.

MATT: Make a dexterity saving throw for me, please.

MARISHA: And we got advantage on the, ooh, fuck!

LAURA: We do? And I got advantage on the other attacks.

MATT: You did.

MARISHA: I missed 'em.

MATT: Got to remember that.

MARISHA: Yeah, 29.

MATT: 29, success.

LAURA: 23.

MATT: 23, failure.

SAM: Oof.

MATT: So you take--

LIAM: 23 failure?

MATT: -- 16 points of bludgeoning damage,

TRAVIS: One-six or six-zero?



MATT: 16 points of bludgeoning damage.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You take eight, Beauregard.

MARISHA: All right.

LAURA: 23's a failure?! This is-- we're fucked.

TRAVIS: Nuh-uh.

LAURA: This is ancient.

SAM: No, you're fucked. You're fucked.

MATT: Jester, you knocked prone from the impact from failing your save, and (whooshing) tumble down and land prone onto the ground beneath the dragon.

LIAM: It's okay, you're just by its tail.

LAURA: So that bonus action was for naught?

MATT: Because of the failed save, unfortunately, yes. You do manage to hold on, Beauregard.

MARISHA: Oh-okay.

MATT: That finishes your turn.

LAURA: Cool.

MATT: It is now Gelidon's turn.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

MATT: Huh. Gelidon is going to go ahead and rush forward, right up to you, Yasha. Since you were right there in front of its vision after Jester pulls off the back. Beau's up on top. It's going to go ahead and stumble forward. And first it's going to use its frightful presence. So I need everybody, and I mean everybody, to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me, please.

MARISHA: With advantage?

MATT: Yep.

LIAM: Yep, okay. With advantage.

MARISHA: (laughs ruefully) I rolled two 11s. 15.

LIAM: This is a wisdom save?

MATT: (laughs) What you got, Ashley?

ASHLEY: I just rolled two natural 20s. (cheering)

MATT: That's amazing!

ASHLEY: I mean, that's not, like, crazy helpful right now, but a little bit.

LAURA: You really did wonders for her.

SAM: I did, she's dodeca-healed herself.

TRAVIS: Don't ever shave that mustache. (laughter)

SAM: We do this with advantage, yes?


SAM: 25.


MATT: 23, success, success.

LAURA: Wait, that was a success? 26.

MATT: Success.

LIAM: 24.

MATT: Success.

MATT: Yasha, success. Caduceus?


MATT: Success. Beauregard, 15? Fail. You are frightened for the next minute.


LIAM: On its back?

MATT: On its back.

MARISHA: (screaming)

MATT: And you're just screaming. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Use the eye!

LIAM: That's realistic, that's realistic.

MARISHA: It's okay, I got this guys. I'm a monk.

MATT: Tyffial is frightened.

SAM: Wait, monks can be frightened?

MARISHA: Monks can get rid of frightened for an action.

ASHLEY: They also have advantage on saving throws.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'm okay.

MATT: They do, you're right. Yeah, no so...

LAURA: Sweet.

MATT: Which I should've seen with the marks there. Yeah. That advantage made a difference to them, too. Natural 20. Oh yeah, so yeah, none of the rest are frightened. It's just you, Beau. And it's going to unleash a round of attacks on you, Yasha, as part of that. So...

ASHLEY: (squeals)

MATT: Two bite attacks. I'm sorry, one bite attack and two with its claws. So the bite attack against you is... 26 to hit.


MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: Going to be a little more rough.

ASHLEY: It's going to be a little rough, it's okay.

MATT: That is 22 points of piercing damage, but you are not raging yet, so--

ASHLEY: I am not, that's right. Because I'm an idiot.

LIAM: Those-- Those random encounter tables--

ASHLEY: Boy, oh boy, that would've been so smart to rage.

MATT: Plus 14 points of cold damage as its teeth tear in your chest and pull you back. You manage to push away, but as it does, the blood that pours free (creaking) freezes in place. The cold impact of its teeth seems to freeze the wounds that left with them. Now it's going to go ahead and get two claw strikes against you.

ASHLEY: So you said 16.

MATT: And then 14 cold.

ASHLEY: And then 14, okay.

SAM: So you're now mind controlled because every fight you are mind controlled.

MATT: 32 to hit.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: So 32 to hit, which I believe hits. And a 26 to hit.

ASHLEY: Oh yeah.


MATT: So you take--

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: 13 points of slashing damage. Ah, and 19 points of slashing damage.

ASHLEY: So 14, 16, 13, 19.

MATT: Correct.

ASHLEY: Got it. (laughter) Fuck.

TALIESIN: How are you?

MARISHA: That's just my banner.

ASHLEY: Let me add all this.

MATT: And that's its turn.

TRAVIS: Got to rage.

ASHLEY: Yeah, that was stupid to not rage.

MATT: You know what? No, it's not done yet. It came in and unleashed on you. And now it's going to go ahead and (whooshing) try and fly up. You do get an attack of opportunity against it.

ASHLEY: Okay, let me take it.

LAURA: Natural 20!

ASHLEY: Come on.

MATT: You do have an advantage because you do--

TRAVIS: Did you do it?

ASHLEY: Yes, I fucking just rolled a natural 20.

MATT: All right, well, it does not take off because you have Sentinel.

SAM: It's in the book. (laughter) That's chapter three, what she just did. (laughter)

ASHLEY: What is happening? Let's go to Vegas. Okay. What do I do? Okay, I know what to do.

ASHLEY: Take your time, take your time.

ASHLEY: Sorry.

SAM: Caduceus instinctually cancels the crit.

TRAVIS: Do you get a brutal critical?


TRAVIS: Okay, take your time with this. Make sure you get all your dice.

TALIESIN: Yeah, because there's a ton of crazy shit that happens.

SAM: A ton of crazy shit.

ASHLEY: "You can roll two additional weapon damage dice when determining the extra damage for a critical hit with a melee attack."

MATT: Correct, so you roll two addition d6s.

SAM: This is a melee attack, right?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: This is not a magic thing where the 20s do things to, right?

MATT: No, it's a melee attack.

SAM: Butterflies aren't going to pop out of her sword? Okay, cool.

LAURA: If only.

ASHLEY: Okay. Okay, so that was 12. I'm going to do Savage Attacker just to see if I can get some higher. Way better. (laughter) I get two additional.

LIAM: We're in rare form tonight.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: I know.

LIAM: Ay yi yi.

TRAVIS: I mean, look, we could've done the thing where we conjured a fake wooly mammoth and had a T-Rex chase it, but it's an ancient dragon.

MARISHA: (chuckles) Yeah.

ASHLEY: I rolled 20.

MATT: 20 damage, all right?

ASHLEY: But that's plus, do I add all my stuff?

MATT: You don't add your rage bonuses because you're not raging.

ASHLEY: Not the rage, but savage and radiant?

MATT: You add your strength bonus.

ASHLEY: Okay, so that would be--

MATT: And you add the weapon bonus.


TALIESIN: Do you do that before or after you double?

ASHLEY: Yeah, do you do--

MATT: After you double. It's the dice doubled and then add the modifier.

ASHLEY: Okay, so everything would be...

TALIESIN: 40 plus?

MATT: So you rolled 20.


MATT: So you double the 20 to 40.


MATT: And you add your strength modifier and your weapon modifier.

ASHLEY: Okay, so 40, so 44 and plus

MATT: One is it?


MATT: It should be just the magic bonus of the weapon, which is plus--

ASHLEY: Oh yeah, okay.

MATT: So, 45?


MATT: 45 damage in one strike and holding it to the ground. So here's what happens.

MARISHA: Holy shit.

MATT: It begins to take off (whoosh). And you just swing and strike with the blade as it carves through its foot, it (grunting). "You have a new scent."

SAM: A new scent?

TRAVIS: A new scent?

ASHLEY: A new scent, I think because I'm new, because she hasn't met me yet.

MARISHA: She wasn't here before.

MATT: You weren't there for the original Gelidon experience. And seems temporarily intrigued by you. The scattering ants that shot around, it's not too worried about. You're, it's briefly turning an eye to. That ends its turn.

SAM: Everybody loves fucking Yasha, Jesus! (laughter)

MATT: That brings it to Lucien's turn.

LAURA: It's that angel blood.

TRAVIS: Lucien's up after the dragon?

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Come on, Lucien!

ASHLEY: God, why didn't I rage?

MATT: Lucien in the snow just goes like.

LIAM: Yeah, flex, show us your battle skills, dude.

MATT: "You could've mentioned that you were being chased by a dragon."

TALIESIN: Who can remember? (laughter)

TRAVIS: I mentioned the underwater--

LAURA: What if Lucien comes up in one-punch kills it?

SAM: That'd be awesome.

TRAVIS: (boom)

TALIESIN: Then we'd know that we've made the right decision the entire time.

TRAVIS: Here's the lodestone, here you go. You got it. Go for it.


TRAVIS: Thanks for the tattoos!

MARISHA: We'll go wherever you want to go. Yeah.

LIAM: We will lip sync with you all you like.

MATT: Can't quite get to that point.

ASHLEY: Why didn't I rage?

SAM: Because you helped all of us.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

MATT: It's true.

SAM: You did the right choice. Sacrifice yourself for the greater good.

TALIESIN: How many are you down? How many points are you down?

ASHLEY: I'm not too bad.

SAM: Yeah, you're fine.

ASHLEY: Just 63.

SAM: You're surrounded by healers.

TRAVIS: I did the math.

MARISHA: 63 points.

LIAM: Oh wow.

MATT: All right, so he's going to go ahead and pull both the scimitars out and as he does, run across the front of the clavicle and the other one's going to go ahead and, we'll just one at the moment, actually, is going to (whoosh) carve across and you see it (whoosh) ignite with this bright light similar to somebody you once knew.

SAM: Still a blood hunter?

MARISHA: Still a blood hunter.

TRAVIS: Claret Order, they all are.

MATT: Then...

TALIESIN: It's apparently still a thing.


LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: That's just, just not close enough to get into melee with it. So out of frustration, he's going to go ahead and hold his action, prep and attack for when he can get within range of it.


MATT: All right, that finishes Lucien's turn. Tyffial's going to go.

LAURA: Have you gone yet?


MATT: Same thing: can't quite get into melee. Is going to go ahead and-- you know what, he's going to go ahead use his-- use her action to move off to the side here. And is going to action surge to go ahead after pulling this, this long-- this would be a rapier out. That has this dark gray, almost graphite metallic tinge to it. And as she pulls it out, you can see she runs this hook across the hand, and there's this little splash of blood across the blade, as it does, you watch it ignite with a very, this would be a black energy, almost like it has blackened tendrils, similar to what you've seen Fjord utilize or summon from magic, but it just pulses around the blade. And is going to go ahead and make attacks against the creature with advantage.

SAM: Oh!

MATT: Good thing you gave her advantage.

SAM: This is Cree?

MATT: This is Tyffial.

SAM: Tyffial.

MATT: One hits. Four plus.

SAM: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

MATT: 14 points of damage against Gelidon. This is a lot in here to be running at once. All right, so that finishes Tyffial's turn. Now it is Fjord's go. Fjord, what are you doing?

TRAVIS: How far away is Lucien from--

MATT: Actually, at the end Tyffial's turn, Lucien's going to go ahead and use legendary action.

SAM: Lucien?

TRAVIS: Lucien or the dragon?

MATT: Lucien, at the end of Tyffial's turn. He's going to go ahead spend--

TALIESIN: We're learning so much.

MATT: -- to tumble.

MATT: You watch as he kicks off from the stone and tumbles in the snow and with his held action, manages to move half his movement up to the side and then swing across with the blade towards it.

TRAVIS: That helps [inaudible].

LIAM: Not just a remote control PC.

MATT: Definitely hits. With the branded blade there.

LIAM: Wow.

LAURA: Does this mean you guys are going to get legendary actions? Cool!

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: That would be awesome.

TALIESIN: What if there were legendary actions that you didn't control?

MATT: 22 points of damage against Gelidon with the one strike.

LAURA: How many?

MATT: 22, and the second attack held action. Thanks to your advantage is a natural 20.

LAURA: (cackles)

TRAVIS: Boom, let's go.

MATT: Woo!

TRAVIS: Get it right, add 'em all up.

ASHLEY: Get it right.

MATT: 34 points of damage on the second strike.

LIAM: We're watching him dance like Baryshnikov, right now.

MATT: Yeah, you see him dive into the snow, vanish for a second, appear out, strike, and with each strike, these burst waves, this faint light glow. It's different than what you recall on Molly. It was more of a radiant light. This has like a weird silver shimmer. And when it hits, there's this almost shockwave effect that happens and you see this wincing in the eyes of the dragon with each impact. That's going to finish Lucien's go on that. Fjord, now what are you doing?

TRAVIS: The Star Razor is going to pulse blue and I will fly in towards the dragon. As I'm approaching, once I'm within 30 feet, I will extend my hand and Hexblade's Curse.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Against the dragon.

MATT: Put you about there.

TRAVIS: That's only 30 feet from where I was?

LAURA: Tight.

MATT: Well, that's 30 feet within it.

TRAVIS: Oh, great, great. I'll use my full 60 feet to come around on the dragon's left side and is there a particular spot that I would be able to flank it with Lucien and/or Tyffial?

MATT: Right there.

TRAVIS: I'll stay right there within melee range.

MATT: It is cursed.

TRAVIS: And I will take two swipes with the Star Razor.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: With advantage. Oh, so close. That is 29 to hit.

MATT: 29 does hit, yeah.

TRAVIS: Okay, and the second one is-- Come on, do it. Natural 20.

MATT: Hell yeah, dude! Yeah, get it!

LAURA: Natural 20s tonight!

TRAVIS: I will pump a 5th-level Divine Smite in on the natural 20, but the first one just hit and it is a regular. Nine plus eight, 17 plus five is 22 for the first one.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: And the second one is eight plus eight is 16.

SAM: It's because of that mantra. We all said that mantra.

LAURA: Because I laughed during it, I didn't get a good roll.


SAM: That's right.

MATT: That paladin crit math.

TRAVIS: 37, its Divine Smite is-- Help me!

TALIESIN: (laughs)

LIAM: d8s.

TRAVIS: Yeah, but it's only 4d8, right? Max 5d8 is if it's undead, right?

MATT: Well, no, it should--

LIAM: You can scale, right? ♪ It's been a while. ♪

MATT: Well, it's not undead. So you don't get the additional bonus one.

TRAVIS: Right.

MATT: But for the paladin, if it's a 5th-level spell you used, right?

TRAVIS: It is.

MATT: Then that brings it to, if I recall.

LIAM: Raises depending on the spell level.

MATT: Yeah, maximum of 5d8. So if you do 5th-level, it's 5d8.


SAM: Ooh!

TRAVIS: Nice! 30, 60.

LIAM: Should be a big hit.

TRAVIS: 65 points of damage, and because it's a crit, I roll one more damage dice on the--

LIAM: Pala, pala, pala, paladin, yo.

TRAVIS: Plus four.

MATT: All right, there you go. So that brings a total of 69 damage.

SAM: Yeah!

MATT: Nice.

SAM: (whispering) That's a sex thing.

MATT: Do you finish your turn, Fjord?

TRAVIS: That's 106 total; that's great. Yes, yes, he's cursed.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

MARISHA: Fjord and Yasha got this, we don't...

TRAVIS: Does Divine Smite cancel out a concentration Fly spell?

MATT: No, it's not a concentration.

TRAVIS: Okay, cool.

MATT: All right, that finishes there. It is now Otis' turn. Otis is going to go ahead move.

TRAVIS: Thank you, Yasha.

MARISHA: Is Otis the halfling?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Otis is the halfling I'm perpetually trying to kill, yeah.

MATT: Spend his turn running around the backside of it--

LIAM: -- can blame it on the dragon.

MATT: -- trying to essentially swarm around as you guys are swarming around. That's going to be Otis' turn.

MARISHA: Oh, shit! You were just in my way.

MATT: Zoran's going to go.

SAM: Guys, I shot Otis in the face.

MATT: Zoran's going to rush there. But he used his action to get there, too, to get into melee. But you watch as Otis rushes behind, you can see Otis ends up pulling a bolt out of the pack and has a crossbow ready. And on the crossbow, you can see, there's a little point on the handle. Like a thumbtack that he presses his thumb into and as he pulls back, all of a sudden, you see this purplish energy begin to pulse and scatter throughout the crossbow

SAM: They're all blood hunters?

TRAVIS: It's preview night, kids. It's preview night.

MARISHA: Yeah, it is.

LIAM: Now that guy cannot play video games. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Ow, ow, ow, ow!

MATT: He has to rest for a while after.

TRAVIS: Press square rapidly. No.

LAURA: No. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Remember he has advantage.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Or does he have--

ASHLEY: Otis does not.

TALIESIN: Otis does not, never mind.

MATT: Otis did not attack. They both had to use their actions to get into place.

TALIESIN: Oh, fair.

MATT: But you see Zoran, it was in the pack, pulls out this large, two-handed hammer, this maul and runs around the side. As he does, you can see he runs his hand along the edge. There's these cheese grater-like spikes on one side and he goes (whooshing) you see this red spray across it, and wherever it sprays, flames emerge from it. Now it's this flaming head and handle of a maul as he runs up to the side of the dragon, just going (roaring) with this big roar. That's going to get them both there. Caduceus, you're up, with Cree on deck.

TALIESIN: Okay, I can't see where I am.

MATT: You're over here.

TRAVIS: For the people--

TALIESIN: I'm over there.

TRAVIS: Could you point again with your finger who is who? Is Zoran--?

MATT: Zoran is over here.


MATT: This is Otis.


MATT: That's Tyffial. That's Lucien.

TALIESIN: Who's standing next to me?

MATT: Next to you is Cree.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm going to-- I'm going to be dull for this round. I'm going to circle around to the other side of the block, still hiding from the dragon.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Sort of towards you.

MATT: Around here?


MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: A little-- How close am I? Am I within 30 feet? Well, that doesn't--

MATT: You are-- You're not at-- It is at about 35 or so feet from you at the moment.

TALIESIN: Okay, for the moment. I've got some good shit coming up, but for the moment, I am just doing Protection from Energy: cold, just to--

MATT: On yourself?

TALIESIN: Just to prepare for some crazy shit.

MATT: You got it, good call.

TALIESIN: And take my bonus action, I suppose, to hide, if that's possible.

MATT: You can't hide as a bonus action. That's a rogue thing, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: That's all right, I don't know how that works.

MATT: You crouch a little lower.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I'm still huge, so it's just like an entire person.

MATT: And you're just like--

TALIESIN: As long as I have some cover, I'll take some cover, whatever cover I can get from the dragon.

MATT: You have some cover...

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm good.

MATT: For whatever purpose that may serve.


MATT: (laughs) All righty, and that brings us to Cree's go. Cree-- Juggling some stuff here; my apologies for the delay. There we go, there's Cree.

TRAVIS: It's okay. You're only a dragon and five other fighters.

MATT: Cree, as you're all standing there in the center of the space attacking it.

MARISHA: He is an adventuring party. (laughter)

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: And the dragon.

TRAVIS: You're doing great. You're doing great.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Two beings with legendary actions.

ASHLEY: He's like a D&D--

TRAVIS: We did bring a goristro.

LAURA: I know! Dude, we did. (laughs)

ASHLEY: You're like Bobby Fischer over there, but for D&D. Where you're playing the party and the dragon. That was dumb.

TALIESIN: No, I was with you.

ASHLEY: There was a better way to--

LIAM: Dragon fight.

MATT: So you watch as Cree sneaks up beside you, off to the side, and goes, "Good call to bring a shield from ice. I like to bring its enemy." And you see, she brings her hands down, that little bobble of red that's dangling her throat glows brightly. She brings her hands up (groans) and all of you in the center feel this sudden flash of warmth as this column of fire begins to (roaring) burn like a spiral around Gelidon. Gelidon (roars) pulls back as you watch this firestorm erupt around the dragon.

MARISHA: (whimpering scream)

SAM: Oh no.

MARISHA: (yells) (laughter)

LIAM: Just got worse.

MARISHA: (crying) Just real bad.

MATT: She fails her save. That's going to be 7d10 fire damage.

TRAVIS: 7d10!

LAURA: That's...

SAM: To the dragon?


SAM: Fire?


SAM: Is that going to hurt Beau?

LAURA: Is that Fire Storm?

MATT: It is Fire Storm. It's doing a spiral column upward.

TALIESIN: Oh, so all good.

SAM: Is Beau okay?

MARISHA: Don't hit me, please.

MATT: Beau, I need you to make a dexterity saving throw.

MARISHA: Okay, this is considered evasion?

TRAVIS: Use the ki point.

MATT: It would be.

MARISHA: I do still have, I do still have--

MATT: 49 points of fire damage to the dragon.

MARISHA: -- advantage.

TRAVIS: 49 point?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Hoo.

MARISHA: Thank god I have advantage still, because one of those was natural one.

MATT: Well, you would not have advantage-- no, you would because it hasn't gone back to her. So yeah, you would.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You said dex saving throw, right?

MATT: Correct.


LIAM: Cat on a hot tin roof.

MATT: 23 is a success.


MATT: So you take 24 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: If it's success, I take no damage.

MATT: Ah, but you have advantage-- I mean, you have evasion. So yeah, so you actually-- you cling to the side of the dragon and the heat coasts over you. You feel it and it hurts, but not enough to actually leave damage on your body. Yeah, it's like a platformer. I scale to one side of the dragon and then I scale to the other side of the dragon, as it columns up.

MATT: Your little grip icon is getting slower and slower.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Perfect, perfect.

LAURA: You can do one of those evasions per your turn?

MATT: Just whenever she makes a save. It's just-- it's an ability. But only dexterity saves.

LAURA: Okay, okay.

MATT: That finishes that go for Cree. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: With Veth on deck.

LIAM: Couple of things, one Caleb is not in the air because those boots are only good for one turn. So if they're off and I'm in the air I crash. So I would have landed already.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: And I think I'm not on that picture there. I'm going to start moving up the side of that map, but not right along the edge of it.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Keeping in that arc?

LIAM: Yeah, on the ground, though, in the snow.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Saying ♪ he's going for distance, ♪ ♪ he's going for speed ♪ and I will rub molasses down my hand. ♪ He's all alone in that time of need ♪ and I will cast slow on Gelidon.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: So wisdom save for Gelidon.

MATT: Wisdom save from Gelidon.

TRAVIS: [inaudible]

MATT: That is an 18 exactly.

LIAM: (groans) Okay.

MATT: Good call, though.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right, is that your turn?

LIAM: Yeah, that's it.

MATT: Veth, you're up. Yasha, you're on deck. Actually, at the end of your turn, Caleb, Gelidon, who's now been burned and angrily-- is after the impact that left on the heavy back, since you're in that direction is going to go ahead and use one of its legendary actions to tail swipe you.


MARISHA: Could I get a Sentinel attack on him?

MATT: You could, yeah. Yeah, if you still have a reaction.


MATT: That is a natural 20.

TALIESIN: Am I within 30 feet?

MATT: You are not. You are 35 feet.

SAM: He read my book. She read my book. (laughter)

MARISHA: Big negative for me.

MATT: You missed?


TALIESIN: Even with the bonus, even with advantage?

MARISHA: I'm technically frightened, so I have disadvantage, so it evens out and I rolled a three.

MATT: Okay, that is--

TRAVIS: Let's just see how Armor of Hexes works.

MATT: -- 29 points of bludgeoning damage as the tail (whoosh) swings towards you like a tree trunk being sped in your direction.

TRAVIS: So he is under my Hexblade's Curse.

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: She, sorry. Thank you. So on an attack roll, I roll a d6 and a four or higher, she misses with a six.

MATT: Did you just roll a six? Yeah, you did! You just quickly fly up out of the way.

TRAVIS: There's a plan to this recipe, motherfucker.

MATT: The tail still comes towards you and just at that point, you see the shadows from that faint shadow curse around, reach out like ropes and yank the tail just wide as you pull up underneath, it taps your toes and you can sense that would have been awful, had it impacted.

LAURA: You just hear me from behind you laying in the snow go: Woo! (laughter)

MATT: All right, Veth, now it's your go.

SAM: Okay, I'll keep circling in a counterclockwise direction. As I'm running, I'll cast another one of those spells, Voltaic Bolt. Charge up another one.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: And skid in the snow and fire off that bolt.

MATT: (whoosh) Spraying up as you slide into home base,

SAM: 24 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

SAM: And since I get-- wait, I'm attacking with advantage, right, still?



SAM: Okay. Well, still say same roll but I get sneak attack damage because she's engaged with my friends?

MATT: You do.

SAM: Okay, cool.

MATT: She's very engaged with your friends. She is swarmed by your friends.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay.

SAM: 35 plus another 14 is 49 points of damage.

MATT: Woo hoo!

TALIESIN: Taking chunks.

TRAVIS: Look at the lone mini out here in this camera angle. (laughter)

MATT: Yep. Yep.

ASHLEY: That's a hero shot.

TALIESIN: That's a book cover.

TRAVIS: (whoosh) (explosion sound)

SAM: That's all I got.

MATT: All righty. Finishing your go. Yasha, you're up.

LIAM: Wow.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to let out a scream of rage.

TRAVIS: (growls)

SAM: Yeah!

ASHLEY: And I'm going to take an attack.

MATT: Do it.

ASHLEY: Ooh, it's a natural 19. So plus nine, that's 28.

MATT: That definitely hits.


SAM: You got us into this Yasha, get us out.

ASHLEY: I'm going to do my bestest.

TALIESIN: I feel Travis is really dodging a lot of-- (laughs) a lot of blame here.

LAURA: I know!

TALIESIN: I'm just saying. (laughter)

TALIESIN: You keep smiling every time that happens.

TRAVIS: I'll take all of it. (laughter)

TALIESIN: I'm going to try a brand new spell.

ASHLEY: 29 for the first hit.

MATT: Yeah, that definitely hits.

ASHLEY: Yeah? Oh, no, that's the damage.

MATT: That's the damage, I'm sorry, yeah.

SAM: (pigeon coos) Should we start trying to kill one of the Tomb Takers?

TRAVIS: I knew you were going to ask that. (laughter)

SAM: I mean, you're right back there. (coos)

TRAVIS: I think we have slightly larger concerns.

SAM: Yeah, but (coos) there's less of other people who could (coos) take care of the dragon. (coos)

LIAM: They see everything. (coos)

TRAVIS: Two of us are compromised, potentially. (coos) (laughter)

ASHLEY: Okay, 15.

MATT: 15 misses.

MARISHA: So many fucking pigeons right now!

MATT: All right, that finishes your go. Beau and Jester, you are up.

MARISHA: Okay, I'm going to use my action to Stillness of Mind. I'm going to take a little meditation moment on the top of this dragon.

MATT: And get rid of frightened?

MARISHA: And get rid of frightened.

MATT: You got it.

MARISHA: Then I'm going to take my bonus action to pop pop and Flurry of Blows.

MATT: Unfortunately, to make a bonus attack with your bonus action, you have to make the attack action. It can't be separate.

MARISHA: That's right. I can bonus attack tack, though-- bonus action attack, right?

MATT: It has to be technically part of the attack action to get the bonus offhand hit, I believe-- I will double check. I'm pretty sure.



ASHLEY: I have advantage on attack rolls.

MATT: You do, go ahead and roll one more time.

ASHLEY: Let me roll one more time, okay, sorry.

TRAVIS: It was a 19.

MATT: It's okay.


MATT: 24 does hit. Go ahead and roll damage for that second attack.


SAM: Yes!

ASHLEY: Fuck yes.

MATT: Yeah, if you use the attack action with an unarmed strike or monk weapon, you can make one unarmed strike as a bonus action. So you have to make the attack action to get the bonus.

TALIESIN: So you can keep the frightened, but no.

MARISHA: I'm not keep that frightened.


MATT: 14 again? Misses.

ASHLEY: No, 14 points of damage.

MATT: Oh, 14, yeah, I was like wait-- no, we hit it. 14 damage. You got it. All righty.

MARISHA: I will, I guess, then, use my bonus action to Patient Defense?

MATT: Okay, Patient Defense and Jester, what are you doing?

SAM: When you're frightened, do you have-- you just can't get any closer when you're frightened.

MATT: And all of your attacks are at disadvantage while it's in visual sight.

SAM: But you don't have to run away, right?

MATT: You can't get closer.

SAM: You just can't get closer.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: And she's as close as they get.

MATT: Yep!

SAM: Okay, cool.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: But disadvantage on everything sucks.

LAURA: I'm going to do the same thing that I saw Cree do and I'm going to sit up in the snow.

SAM: Are you're going to cut yourself?

LAURA: I'm going to just scratch my arm really hard and then-- (laughter) and then try to form my Fire Storm into a tornado as well and say: Um, duck, Beau! Take cover! (flames crackling)

MATT: Okay, okay.

MARISHA: Duck pull--

TRAVIS: (explosion)

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh god!

MATT: 18, what's your DC?

LAURA: 18.

MATT: Makes the save, so it takes half damage. Still hits, though. Beau, go ahead and make a dexterity saving throw.

MARISHA: That's just a straight one, right?

MATT: Correct, no longer with disadvantage.

MARISHA: Everything's done? Oh, that's okay, that's okay. 20 total.

MATT: I think you succeed, yeah.

LAURA: Good, good.

MATT: So half fire damage to Gelidon and you from this.

MARISHA: And me?

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: So it's instantly--

MATT: Yes, you take nothing, that's right.

LAURA: One, two, three, four, five--

MATT: Rogues and monks, man.

LAURA: -- six, seven.

SAM: Wow, is that a reaction or does that just happen?

MATT: No, it just happens.

MARISHA: It just happens.

MATT: You've got it, too, man.

SAM: Oh, evasion because it's area attacks.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: I'm never near those.

TRAVIS: She's digging around.


SAM: Because I run.

MATT: That's true.

TRAVIS: It's like the sharpest cake ever.

MATT: You have active evasion, just not being there.

LAURA: 45 plus seven.

MATT: That's 52.

LAURA: 52.

MATT: Great, so half that would be--


MATT: 26.

LAURA: 26, that's better.

MATT: 26 fire damage to Gelidon. You got it.

MARISHA: You just take it.

MATT: All right, end of your turn, it's going to use its last two actions to do another wing attack. Now its wings are beating heavily and that snow and wind picks up rapidly. Everybody except for Jester and Veth needs to make a--

TALIESIN: Everybody?

MATT: Dexterity saving throw.

SAM: Errybody.

MATT: Oh, sorry and it goes over there, you're fine.

LIAM: Are we still all at advantage from the Yasha move or was that a one round?

TRAVIS: One round.

ASHLEY: Yeah, we're done.

MATT: All right.

SAM: That's such a cool feature.


MATT: 18, fail. You take 16 points of bludgeoning damage and fall prone.

TRAVIS: Got it.

MATT: So you, (whoosh, boof) onto the ground. Go ahead and make your concentration check for your Fly. You do not, you're fine.

LIAM: I failed, but I will use ring of evasion to make it a success.

MATT: You're fine. You're way far way, actually.

LIAM: Way far away? Okay.

MATT: Yeah, sorry, hard to see you when you're off the map.

LIAM: My favored terrain.

MATT: Yasha.

ASHLEY: So I have a thing called Fanatical Focus. "If you fail a saving throw while you're raging then you can reroll it"?

MATT: Yeah, you can do that.

ASHLEY: But you have to use the new one. Because I rolled

SAM: ♪ A little thing called fanatical ♪

ASHLEY: I rolled a 10 total and I think that might be too low.

MATT: All right, go for it.

ASHLEY: I'm gonna try to do it again.

TRAVIS: 25 on the concentration check.

ASHLEY: That's not much better. That would be 13.

MATT: Fail, 16 points of bludgeoning damage to you, halved because you're raging, but you are knocked prone.

ASHLEY: Eight points?

MATT: Yeah, eight points to you total.

ASHLEY: Okay, that's fine.

TRAVIS: With War Caster, 25 on the concentration check.

MATT: So, you maintain the spell, but you fall to the ground. Beauregard?

MARISHA: Uh-huh? Oh, 27.

MATT: 27? You succeed!


MATT: Hell yeah, all right.

MARISHA: Hang on.

MATT: So you hang on. You take half the damage. So you would take eight points of bludgeoning damage. This is in the air. Well, actually this would be-- yeah, I guess that would count. Yeah, so you take none. Fucking-- All right.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Otis fails and gets knocked prone.

LIAM: Remember when Raishan cast Meteor Storm twice and I took no damage?


MATT: Tyffial succeeds.

LAURA: And everyone else was like--

MARISHA: And we were all fucked up, yeah.

MATT: Eight. Stays up. Lucien succeeds, takes eight.

SAM: Otis, Otis is down. (coos) Smother him in the snow. (coos)

LIAM: (laughs)

LAURA: You're right there. You could totally do it yourself.

SAM: I'm going that way. (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

SAM: There can be only one halfling. I feel the quickening.

LIAM: Even got a crossbow, come on.

SAM: I know.

LIAM: Your shtick.

SAM: Oh, my shtick.

MATT: It is now the Gelidon's turn. Gelidon is going to attempt to fly upward.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

LAURA: Stop her.

MARISHA: Pop pop. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah, we get to--

MARISHA: The Sentinel thing. I'm on it, but you can. (cooing)

MATT: You make an attack. You are prone, so you have disadvantage on the attack roll.


LAURA: But you don't have disadvantage.

MATT: It's not moving out of her range because she's on it.

TRAVIS: I'll try and do one as well, too.

SAM: You can Sentinel?

MATT: No, but he can make a reaction. There will be a lot of reaction attacks here.

TRAVIS: But they're at disadvantage.

MATT: But I'm going to go for Yasha's first.

MARISHA: Come on, come on. Just straight up. Just straight up roll? No, disadvantage, you said.

SAM: 20 sides to a better you.

MATT: No, you have disadvantage on it because you are on the ground, you are prone.

ASHLEY: 'Cause I'm laying down.

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: And I'm swinging.

TRAVIS: (whispering) Go reckless.

ASHLEY: Fucking fuck! Sorry, I rolled a 20 and a one. (groaning)

MATT: You swing wide on the ground and hit the snow next to it.

ASHLEY: (frustrated noise)


LAURA: And Beau, Yasha.

MATT: So, yeah.

ASHLEY: At least I'm rolling semi-decent.

MATT: You are, your are.

ASHLEY: For the first time in I don't know how long.

LIAM: After seven.

TRAVIS: Waking it up.

MATT: Tyffial misses. Lucien hits! Double ones on damage dice, but still does four points of damage.

TRAVIS: Reroll ones?

MATT: No. And Zoran hits.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's go, Zoran.

MARISHA: Does he have Sentinel?

MATT: He does not.

MARISHA: Aww. Do you want him to have Sentinel?

TRAVIS: He's got cheese grater.

MATT: 16 damage, and you, Fjord, with disadvantage because you are on the ground.

TRAVIS: No, that's all right. Hey, oh, there's a natural 20 but no, 21.

MATT: 21?


MATT: On the disadvantage?

TRAVIS: Yeah, it was eight plus 13.

MATT: That still hits. 20 hits, roll damage.

TRAVIS: Oh, great, oh great.

ASHLEY: Let's go, Fjord. Keep her down.

TRAVIS: 12 plus five, 17.

MATT: 17 damage, nice. And she's going to fly into the sky.

LAURA: Hold on, Beau.

ASHLEY: With Beau?

MATT: With Beau on her back.

LAURA: Are you okay that I did this to you? Sorry.

MARISHA: No, it's great!

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Oopsie.

SAM: Every time we go on dragons, good things happen.

MATT: She's going to go ahead and turning this way.

SAM: Ooh, that looks like some sort of a cone attack.

LAURA: This looks like it could be bad.

SAM: Could be like a cone or something.

TRAVIS: ♪ Gonna be a cone or something ♪

TALIESIN: How's this dragon? This dragon ain't looking rough, are they?


MATT: She's looking hurt-ish. Starting to show some wear and tear.

LIAM: Two thirds.

LIAM: Two thirds of her hit points.

LAURA: Not even. I'd say we're at half.

MATT: That's what I wanted.

SAM: Oh, that's a cone.

LAURA: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: That's a corner of decimation.

LAURA: Am I in that, or am I out of it?

MATT: Yes, you are.

LAURA: Balls. What if I took one step backwards?

MATT: That'll be-- so I need Fjord, Jester to go ahead and make a constitution saving throw, please.

SAM: And who were the other two in that?

MATT: That's going to be Tyffial and Otis.

LIAM: Yeah, we're going to get home-game Vaxed.

LAURA: Constitutions saving throw.

MARISHA: Home game Vaxed?.

LIAM: Christmas game that I couldn't make. So I was just frozen on ice.

MARISHA: That's right.

TRAVIS: Constitution saving throw, 19.

MATT: That's a failure.

LAURA: 22.

MATT: Failure.

SAM and LIAM: Ooh.


LAURA: I rolled a 19.

MARISHA: Was that for constitution or for--?


MATT: Actually no, 22 just succeeds.

LAURA: (cackles)

LIAM: Fjord failed?

MATT: Fjord fails. Fjord, you take 72 points of cold damage.

TRAVIS: Seven-two, 72?

MATT: Yeah, 72 points of cold damage.

SAM: Wait, are you immune to cold or something?

TRAVIS: I am not, I only have a ring of fire resistance! (laughter)

SAM: Goddamn it!

TRAVIS: That's a big hit.

LAURA: That's a big hit.

MATT: Jester, you take half of that.

MARISHA: How'd the others do?

MATT: 36 and you are resistant to cold naturally, so that brings it down to 18.

LAURA: Sweet.


MARISHA: Did Otis get hit?

MATT: Otis-- both of them actually succeeded on their saves. They both took half damage.

SAM: Okay, okay.

MARISHA: It's wearing him down.

TRAVIS: (muffled) That'll change things.

LIAM: [inaudible]

MATT: Continuing the rest of the flight movement--

LAURA: Do be resistant to cold.

LIAM: Do be a tiefling resistant to ass. Don't be Fjord.

SAM: Are they like frozen in blocks of ice or anything or anything?


SAM: Okay, just hurts.

MATT: It's over here.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: All right, that's Gelidon's turn.

SAM: That's gnarly.

MATT: As Gelidon flies back.

LIAM: That's pretty bad.

MATT: "Like gnats coming out of everywhere!" Unleashes a blast of cold energy, and then begins to fly back and is just staying in the air about 30 feet, 40 feet above. So that brings it to Lucien's go.

TRAVIS: Sorry, dragon is how high in the air, you said?

MATT: 35, 40 feet.


SAM: She's right behind me, isn't she?

LAURA: Did any of the Tomb Takers, were they in the blast zone as well?

MATT: Two of them were.

LAURA: Could I see-- did they take the damage? Did you already say that?

MATT: They made the save. They winced, but they managed to weather it okay.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All right. Lucien sees this and goes, "That's certainly annoying."

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: ♪ Do something cool ♪

SAM: ♪ Something's happening ♪

MATT: That's there. He's going to duck behind there and try and stay out of view. Tyffial is going to do the same.

SAM: Ooh, clumping, clumping. Not good.

MATT: Is going to walk up against the side there and is trying to-- actually more in this space.

TRAVIS: My Armor of Hexes.

LAURA: Did you lose it?

TRAVIS: I did. I rolled my Armor of Hexes, by the way. It was a two, so it hit.

MATT: Okay, good call. Well, it wasn't an attack against you, it was a radial effect.

TRAVIS: Oh great, nevermind.

MATT: So yeah.

LAURA: Are you holding any kind of concentration spell?

MATT: That finishes Lucien's turn and Tyffial's turn..


MATT: Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: The fly spell, I have to roll for the Fly spell again. That's a 16.


TRAVIS: Maintain my Fly spell even though I'm prone right now because he hit me again with the Cone of Cold.

MATT: That's right, yeah, 16? No, that falls, Fly is gone.

TRAVIS: Sweet, and I am-- point to my prone body in the snow? Hi. I'll stand up.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Distance to him, ish?

SAM: Her, her.

MATT: Gauging it to her-- (laughs)

TALIESIN: It's a dragon, man.

TRAVIS: Sorry.

MATT: 50, 60-ish feet from where you are at an angle.

TRAVIS: I'll do three Hex-- Hexblade's Curses. Three--

MATT: Eldritch Blasts?

TRAVIS: Thank you.

LAURA: Her face looks like a Skeksis.

MATT: Go ahead and make the rolls.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Her face looks like a sex scene?

MARISHA: Yeah, she does have a Skeksis face.

SAM: What did you say?

LAURA: Skeksis.

SAM: (laughs) Oh.

ASHLEY: Sexy Skeksis.

TALIESIN: Sexy Skeksis.

TRAVIS: That's a natural 20.

MATT: Yeah!

TRAVIS: For the first one.

MARISHA: That's going to be my Halloween costume.

TRAVIS: Second one is--

MARISHA: Sexy sk-- sexy Skeksis.


MATT: 17 does not hit.

LIAM: (imitates Skeksis hum) Mm!


MATT: Okay, yeah, so two hits one of which is a crit. Go ahead and roll the crit damage first.

LAURA: Nice!


SAM: Remember Halloween?


TRAVIS: 15, so 30 points of force damage on the first one.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Years ago.

TRAVIS: Nine plus five, 14 points on the second one and the crit gets me an additional damage roll with whatever the hell it's called. At the bottom of the page. Savage attacks.

SAM: Savage.

MATT: It says attacks for savage attack, right?

TRAVIS: "When you score a critical hit, roll one of the dice and additional time."

MATT: Yeah, just making sure it wasn't specifying weapon.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, it's a nine, so.

MATT: Great. Another nine damage. All right, that finish your turn?

TRAVIS: And I will use my movement to-- I'm going to track with it this way, away from the rest of the party.

MATT: Okay, you have 15 feet on that.

TRAVIS: Oh, 15 right, yeah.

MATT: You get to there, because you got up from prone. You rush off to the side. That finishes your turn?

TRAVIS: It does.

MATT: All right, Otis is going to get up. 20, that's the most he can get with his prone state. He's going to go ahead and bonus action hide behind you.


MATT: Yeah. Lightfoot halflings can do that. And so from your perspective, you see Otis run and then vanish. Almost like Fjord wiped to another door.

TRAVIS: Veth, where'd he g-- (chokes) (laughter)

SAM: No! I wanted to kill you. (laughter)

MATT: All righty, that gets us to Zoran's go.

MARISHA: So good.

MATT: Four, then make an athletics check to climb up the side there offhand.

TRAVIS: Come on, Zoran.

MATT: Yeah, succeeds. Leaps, maul in one hand, other arms grabs, uses the momentum to lift up and then lands on top.


TRAVIS: Let's go.

LIAM: Whoa.

LAURA: Do it, Zoran

LIAM: We've got a Chad. Here it comes.

MATT: Kind of frustrated at the distance.

TALIESIN: And the speed.

MATT: Yeah, he can't-- He doesn't have the range for him. Okay.

SAM: Can't you throw something? Come on, man.

MATT: (laughs) That brings us to Caduceus.

TALIESIN: How far would I have to run to get within 60 feet of this?

MATT: You aren't entirely certain.

SAM: Depends on the hypotenuse.

TALIESIN: Wow, okay, I think I'm going to-- Wow, what am I going to do? I'm going to... pull to the left, away from the group a little bit more. Or I suppose my right. I'm so sorry, the map is odd. Yeah, towards me. Running forward while running also towards the edge of the map.

MATT: So about there.

TALIESIN: Is that about 60?

MATT: That's 30 feet there. You can try whatever you going to do and hope. We'll do the math when it goes.

TALIESIN: Man, this is so risky.

SAM: Those are the best ones.

LAURA: Ah! Live it up, Caduceus!

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and cast Harm.

MATT: Harm, okay.

TALIESIN: So it's a--

MATT: Constitution save?

TALIESIN: Constitution save.

MATT: 31.

SAM: Oh!

TALIESIN: Okay, so that's a save, but still takes--

MATT: Still takes half.

TALIESIN: Should I roll just half the dice or should I double it and roll the--

LAURA: Roll it and half the damage.

MATT: 'Cause you want to roll all the dice.

TALIESIN: Yeah. This is not going to be that great. It's okay.

LAURA: At my angle, your dice are very sparkly.

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah. (laughter)

TALIESIN: My angle, too, to be fair.

SAM: I think he just told you to fuck off. (laughter)

TALIESIN: I'm doing math, man! This is 14d6.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Whoa!

SAM: Why would they ever do that?! Why not just do like 10d8 or--

MARISHA: 3d12?

SAM and MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Why do you never roll luck? Thank you.

TRAVIS: I love it.

SAM: Shamed me.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Is your mustache okay?

SAM: Did it fall off? (laughter)

MATT: I think you're good.

MARISHA: Unfortunately--

ASHLEY: It is moving.

LAURA: Did you color your mustache?

SAM: What?

LAURA: Did you color your mustache?

SAM: No, that's just the color of my--

LAURA: Why is your mustache so dark and then your beard was so not?

SAM: I don't know!

TRAVIS: It's real strange.

SAM: I don't know! I have these weird patches of different--


MATT: 48.

TALIESIN: 48 points of necrotic damage. And that also lowers max health.

MATT: Gotcha.


MATT: So half of 48 would be 24, so it's 24.


MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: What level spell is that?

TALIESIN: That's a sixth.

MATT: Yeah, that's Harm.

ASHLEY: How much does it lower the--?

TALIESIN: However much damage you do--

MATT: It lowers the maximum.

TALIESIN: It lowers.

LAURA: Caduceus just did a Harm spell?


LIAM: Desperate times, you know?

MATT: All right, that finish your go?


MATT: At the end of Caduceus' turn, it's going to use a legendary action to tail strike you, Beauregard. Because you're the one there. So now it's trying to swat the gnat on its shoulders from behind.

MARISHA: Sure. Patient Defense is up.

MATT: So disadvantage on the attack.

MARISHA: At disadvantage,

LAURA: Is it trying to do this to something?


LAURA: I imagine it looks really stupid.

MARISHA: Really dumb.

SAM: Uh-huh.

MATT: 21.

MARISHA: 21 is my AC.

MATT: It literally rolled two sevens plus 14. Oh sorry, plus-- yeah, plus 14.

LIAM: Oh good, plus 14.

MATT: So you take, for the tail strike-- take 15 points of bludgeoning damage, as the tail cracks you across the back of the shoulders and the neck. You hear a slight snap of something, a tendon or muscle and you're just like (grunts). Holding on best you can, as winds just whipping around you. The cold is now causing your face and arms to go numb, your abs exposed, usually very good against the weather, right now are starting to fail.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: (giggles)

MATT: Okay, that finishes--

TRAVIS: "Usually very good." (laughter)


MATT: It's true.

MARISHA: Hey, Yasha.


MARISHA: Look, I'm riding the dragon. Do you see me? Do you see me, Yasha?

ASHLEY: You look so good.

MARISHA: Thanks, dude!

SAM: You're quaking and crying with fear.

MARISHA: (whimpering) Do I look cool, though?

ASHLEY: You look so cool. You look so hot.

MARISHA: (crying) Okay.

LIAM: That was the inner monologue. We just heard (unintelligible screams).

MATT: Cree darts up next to you and goes, "I like your idea, full of surprises." Puts her hand up and clutches the red orb with the other hand and you watch as she casts Harm as well.

LAURA: I think Cree likes you.


TALIESIN: I think Cree is trying to get us both killed.

MATT: Succeeds on the save because of all its constitution.

LAURA: She just keeps running up next to you wherever you go. Like, leave-- stop it.

TALIESIN: I'm a one-wolf wolf pack, come on. (laughter)

TRAVIS: One wolf pack.

MARISHA: "I'm a one-wolf wolf pack."

TALIESIN: There you go. That's not my joke, but I'm proud of it. Can't take credit for that one. (scattered laughter)

SAM: What happened to our battle music?

MATT: Good roll-- oh, it did, it crashed, sorry.

SAM: It crashed?

LAURA: I didn't even notice.

MATT: Trying to do math! Shhh.

LIAM: ♪ (battle horn sound) ♪

SAM: ♪ (singing battle music) ♪

MATT: I'm doing math. Shut the fuck--

LAURA: He's moving-- he's mathing.

ASHLEY: ♪ (battle horn sound) ♪ (laughter)

TALIESIN: Not easy, is it?

MATT: What, do you guys want me to just waive the damage?

ALL: No, no, no, no, no, no! (laughter)

TALIESIN: 14d6 is a lot.

MARISHA: 14d6 is a lot.


MATT: 56 points of damage to half would be 28.

LIAM: This was a random roll on an encounter table.

MATT: Yep! Yep.


SAM: Ashley Johnson.

MATT: All right, so with that, you can see now Gelidon's starting to look hurt.


SAM: Okay.

MATT: Like starting to show some wear and tear.

LIAM: Oh yeah?

MATT: This dragon was not expecting to suddenly have an entire group of what is essentially 12 people leap from the snow and know what they're doing.

SAM: She's going to bug out.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Sounds like it.

MATT: That brings us to Caleb's turn.

LIAM: Okay, I will move-- use all of my movement to get closer to the dragon and I have very few spells that can reach that far and Fireball is bad for Beauregard's cuticles, so I will just try Slow again. It's 18 it has to beat for wisdom.

MATT: For wisdom. That is a 20.

LIAM: Oh, come on, man.

MATT: I'm sorry! (laughter) Ancient dragons have a lot of saving throw bonuses.

LIAM: I'm having a blast.

MATT: You guys are doing great on this with damage. All right. So that finishes your go, Caleb. Top is Veth. Yasha, you're on deck.

SAM: Not much I can do.

MATT: Actually, at the end of Caleb's turn, it's going to go ahead and do another tail swipe against you, Beauregard.

SAM: Sure, sure.

MARISHA: Patient Defense is still up.

MATT: That is going to be... 19, that misses. So the tail actually sweeps over and you, feeling it coming, you dodge out of the way and kick your foot up and actually parries it off to the side, your foot's a little sore and numb from the impact. Like you just hit your funny bone in your whole leg, but nevertheless, you've managed to kick the tail off from smashing you against its back.

TRAVIS: It could just hit himself in the head.

MARISHA: High five, bitch.

TRAVIS: Herself. (laughter)

MATT: All right, now, Veth, what are you doing?

SAM: I will run away and as I'm running away, I'll just fire behind me blind.

MATT: (laughs) Go for it.

SAM: See if I can hit. Natural 20.

MARISHA: Oh ho ho!

MATT: Yeah! Yeah! (clapping)

ASHLEY: Yes! ♪ (triumphant battle horn noises) ♪ (laughter)

SAM: Whoa.

MARISHA: Do you walk away slowly as you do it? A little slow mo?

SAM: It's a good roll. 36 doubled.

LAURA: Whoa!

MATT: On the dice?

SAM: No, 36-- yeah.

MATT: Yeah, without the modifier bonus, so yeah, if it's just the dice, and that's 36, then double it, yeah.

SAM: Okay, so that's 72 plus--

LIAM: Plus the stuff.

SAM: Wait, I'm sorry. It was slightly less than that.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Because one of these is-- oh, wait, no, no, no, I haven't done the modifier yet. So then that's plus six, so it's 72 plus six is 78.

MATT: 78.



MATT: That's a rogue hit.



MATT: That's a rogue hit! Well done.

SAM: And it's a natural 20. So it shoots again.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Whoa!

SAM: 28 to hit.

MATT: Yeah, it does damage--

MARISHA: Oh shit!

MATT: -- so roll another d6 plus--

SAM: Just a one plus six is seven more.

MATT: All right, nice, seven more damage. That finishes your turn? Or you moved.

SAM: Running away, I'm going to try to hide behind Fjord. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Where are you-- (impact sounds, groan)

MATT: You're a lightfoot halfling?

SAM: Huh?

MATT: Are you a lightfoot halfling?

SAM: Yes, I am.

MATT: Okay, so you rush behind Fjord and you see Otis right there is like, (whispers) "Already taken." (laughter) "Already taken."

SAM: He's my friend! You go, you go!

MATT: "No, it's (grumbles)." (laughter)

MATT: Roll a stealth check to see if you guys can Tetris-stack behind Fjord.

LIAM: Fjord is a halfling clown car. (laughter)

SAM: Is it-- what, stealth? Dexterity?

MATT: Yeah, to hide, yeah.

SAM: So with advantage?

MATT: Yeah. Because of your cloak.

SAM: Okay, we're having a stealth off.

MATT: Yep.

SAM: 29.

MATT: You both manage to stack weirdly. (laughter) It's like I said, it's like the Japanese game show where they're having to cluster up to fit through the holes of Tetris. You're both forming behind Fjord, like a tree.

SAM: Get your hands off my tits! (laughter)

MATT: Okay, that finishes your go. At the end of your turn, it's going to use its last legendary action to try and hit you one more time.

MARISHA: Okay, disadvantage still.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Natural one.

MARISHA: Oh, oh, oh!

MATT: That stance is saving you. Don't forget, don't forget.


MATT: When something you've analyzed misses you with an attack--

MARISHA: Oh, I can do my reaction!

MATT: You can-- you can.

MARISHA: I'm going to do that!

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Right now.

MATT: So technically, if you want to spend two more ki points, you could've hit it twice in the interim. Don't forget, that's one of the main features.

MARISHA: I'm so distracted because it's a dragon.

MATT: I know.

MARISHA: Well, I'm going to hit it. Natural 20.


MATT: Hell, yeah.

TALIESIN: What is happening?

MATT: Hell, yeah.

ASHLEY: Bring her down.

MARISHA: Okay. Come on, come on. Big money.

LAURA: This has to be the record for the most nat 20s in the game.

MARISHA: That's-- okay.

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: What's 16 plus seven? Is 21.

MATT: 23.


TRAVIS: CRStats is on it. Can I spend a ki point to do another one for that last one?

MATT: Yeah, you can, because you can spend-- you can take additional reactions. The tail missed as you kicked it off. You actually kick it at one of its joints and you hear a bone crack. As the tail pulls back, there's a kink in it. You actually managed to damage the tail by kicking it off you last round. This round, you spend a ki point to do another reaction. It misses.

MARISHA: As a reaction, I see it coming, I'm going to try and brace my staff in a way that it'll crack over top of the staff.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: Maybe, maybe? No, no, that's not as good as the last time, 16?

MATT: 16 misses.

MARISHA: 18, it would technically be 18, but sill misses.

MATT: 18 still misses. But, no, but good call, good call.


MATT: Yeah, don't forget, when you have something analyzed like that with Extract Aspects, you can do that when they miss you. All right, cool, then it's now Yasha's go.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I'm prone.

MATT: You are prone.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I will get up.

MATT: Okay, that's half your move.

ASHLEY: How far? Would you guys mind moving the camera around so I can see? There we go.



ASHLEY: Oh, I can't get all the way over there, then. I mean, I can't even... Here's a question.

MATT: Yes?

ASHLEY: So if you use your movement and then if I were to, say, also fly, do you also get that extra movement once you--

MATT: You would have to do that first.

ASHLEY: That would be first, okay, okay, okay. Well, I can't reach him anyway, so this is a fun thing to happen-- her.

SAM: Matt, can we just change it to a boy?


SAM: Because, really.



TRAVIS: Sorry, sorry.

ASHLEY: I'm going to--

MATT: She is the Nightmare in Ivory and you respect that.


SAM: You're right, you're right.

TRAVIS: The Nightmare in Ivory.

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to run over as far as I can to get closer.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Because--

MATT: So you move-- So your movement normally is?


MATT: So you have five, 10, 15, 20, 25, that's as close as you can get on your move. You still have your action and your bonus, if you wanted.

ASHLEY: I mean, I can't really do anything. (frustrated grunt)

LAURA: Lose your rage if you don't attack?

TRAVIS: That's okay, she's got other rages.

ASHLEY: I have other rages.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

TRAVIS: Just make sure you don't go down.

TALIESIN: Keep the rage up if you need to.

ASHLEY: Yeah, um... (frustrated grunt)

SAM: Use your spells.

ASHLEY: I'm just like standing out in the middle.

ASHLEY: All my spells that I have?

SAM: Yeah, use your spells. (laughter)

LAURA: Just throw something. That's always worked for you before.

SAM: You got two swords.

ASHLEY: I mean. I'll throw a fucking sword again. I can't, I mean--

MARISHA: Also with me on the monster that you're throwing it towards.

MATT: You know what?

ASHLEY: You know what, I'm--

MATT: What are you going to do?

ASHLEY: You know what I'm going to do? I am going to--

LIAM: (New York accent) What are you going to do?

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: (pigeon coo) Kill Otis.

ASHLEY: I'm going to use Radiant Soul. So I'm going to bamf out my wings. (gasping)

ASHLEY: And, uh... (sighs) (stammers, frustrated sigh) I want to hit it! (laughter)

ASHLEY: But if I do that, I can't throw the sword, obviously.

MATT: Correct, it's an action to do that.

TRAVIS: That's okay.

LAURA: That's okay.

TRAVIS: It'll look real cool.

LAURA: This'll be cool.

ASHLEY: I'm going to throw the sword. I don't want to use this. I don't want to use this yet.

TRAVIS: Are you sure? Are you sure?

ASHLEY: I'm sure. I'm going to throw the sword. I'm going to throw the Skingorger.

MATT: Okay, so you just--

ASHLEY: Just chuck it.

MATT: Roll an attack with disadvantage.

ASHLEY: Did I say it weird?

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Roll with a disadvantage.

MATT: Disadvantage.

ASHLEY: Of course.

MATT: You can reckless if you want to cancel it, but it's up to you.

ASHLEY: This was cocked. Cocked again, I'm not going to roll that. Oh. That is amazing, because that's two ones. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MATT: Are you serious?

ASHLEY: I'm dead serious.

TALIESIN: Wow, it's going tonight.

MATT: Beauregard.

LAURA: Oh no!



MATT: No, I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that, I'm kidding. (laughter)

LIAM: Two ones?

MARISHA: I still have Patient Defense.

MATT: No, you do, you do. It's double ones on that? I can't not do something with that; it's double ones on this.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you have to.

LIAM: Got to.

ASHLEY: You have to?

TRAVIS: On double ones.

ASHLEY: You do have to.

MATT: Just roll two attack rolls again with disadvantage.

TRAVIS: The perfect yin and yang to your previous double 20s.

ASHLEY: Where were you?! 18. And a five.

SAM: Plus something.

MATT: Plus.

ASHLEY: What am I adding, I'm sorry?

MATT: Adding your attack bonus.

ASHLEY: Oh, attack bonus, oh. For the disadvantage one?

MATT: Yeah.


MATT: 13, yeah. So thankfully, Skingorger goes wide and Beauregard, you see it kind of-- you just parry out of the way as it arcs off and disappears into the snow somewhere in the distance.

MARISHA: You just didn't want to go on a date, right? (laughter)

ASHLEY: Yes, I do, I'm just trying to look cool like you.

TALIESIN: Would deflect have worked on that, by the way?

LIAM: She's Godzilla yelling over it all. (yelling)

MATT: If it had hit, maybe.


MATT: It missed entirely.

TALIESIN: Yeah, no, no, carry on.

MATT: Technically, it would be a missile weapon, so if it did hit, she could've maybe caught the sword.

TALIESIN: That would have been--

MATT: Which would have been fun.

LAURA: Oh, that would have been so cool.

TALIESIN: Good to know.


MATT: Yeah, but it didn't hit.

MARISHA: Deflect Missiles, yeah.

MATT: Okay, that finishes it. Now, Beau and Jester, you are up.

MARISHA: Okay, yeah, I am just going to pummel it some more.

ASHLEY: (coughing)

SAM: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: So weird. I'm not sick! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Can't breathe liquid.

ASHLEY: I swallowed that weird.

MARISHA: Pop pop. Okay, that first one is a 22.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: And you know what? I might as well Stunning Strike.

MATT: Roll damage first.

MARISHA: Lame, nine damage.

MATT: Nine damage. Yeah, that is a--

MARISHA: Probably not going to work.

MATT: 32.

MARISHA: That sounds right. Sounds about right.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: The second one is a 21 to hit.

MATT: That hits as well.

MARISHA: Lord have mercy. Okay, that's better.

SAM: You can make pull Otis around that thing and just prison shiv him.

MARISHA: 14 damage.

TRAVIS: While all nine eyes watch us do it.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike, fuck it.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: The blood attacks us, we're like--

MATT: That is a... 34.

MARISHA: Yeah, no, no, no.

MATT: Rolled a 19, sorry.

MARISHA: What else do I want to do here? Can I-- do I get the sense that she's rearing for another breath weapon?

MATT: You get the sense she's starting to shift into survival mode. She was caught off-guard, and is now gauging whether or not to fight or flight.


MATT: With your high passive instinct, I'd say, and your proximity to her, you can sense the breathing picking up. You can see the wounds and just the trajectory seems to be on that cusp, it could go either way. You're not sure.

MARISHA: Okay, with that, I'm just going to bonus action, pop, pop. Those are both great, that is a natural 18 for the first one for 28 with my fists.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: And then the next one was a 17 for 27.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: So I want to do a Legolas and the horse, you know how he swooped around. So I want to take my staff and loop it around, I'm a loop around the front of her neck and I want to pop, pop, pop as I go by.

MATT: Okay, go for it. So you swing around the dragon's neck, kicking over and then grabbing onto the edge. You just impact twice underneath the throat area.

MARISHA: And then throw myself back onto her back.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: And that damage is going to be... Oh, lord, that was horrible! A one and a two, so that's going to be seven damage for one and eight damage for the other.

MATT: You got it. So you do manage to swing around, catch yourself. Doesn't quite do as much damage as you hope, but you manage to land back on the neck. No worries. Jester?

MARISHA: It looked cool.

MATT: Did look cool.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to run forward.

MATT: Full movement?

LAURA: But like-- Yes, my full movement, I'm going to run towards that snowbank, like to the left of Fjord, you know?

TRAVIS: Don't hide behind me.

LAURA: No, no, no, no, no, yeah. Like, more hiding behind the spire, but like-- Can I get past the snowbank or is that my--

MATT: You can, but that will be all of your movement to get there.

LAURA: Can I see Fjord?

MATT: You, from there, barely.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I can see it.

MATT: Barely. He has three-quarters cover, but you have sight, yeah.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to-- Only for you, Fjord--


SAM: What's happening?

LAURA: (loud exhale) I'm going to cast Heal!

SAM: Ah!

LAURA: At Fjord. (laughter)


LAURA: And you're going to regain 70 hit points!

TRAVIS: What?!

LAURA: I know.

MATT: That day, her heart grew three sizes. (laughter)

TRAVIS: She loves me.

TALIESIN: Spell slot is gone.

MARISHA: I like to imagine even Gelidon is like, "Oh shit."

LAURA: "Oh!" (laughter)

MARISHA: Everyone on the battle field stops.

MATT: Gelidon's like, "I wish I had somebody to care for me like that." (laughter)


LAURA: (lip flapping)

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: I am proud of you.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Feels good, doesn't it?

TRAVIS: Healer.

LAURA: Def, whatever. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Well, that softens it a bit.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right, there you go. That finishes your turn, Jester. It is now Gelidon's turn. Let's roll to see if--

LAURA: You're welcome.

MATT: Breath weapon does not come back, which means proximity, now angrily, the claws are going to reach back for you, two attacks against you. With disadvantage because you have Patient Defense still? No, no, because you took your turn, right, okay.

MARISHA: I did, I did, I did Flurry of Blows instead.

MATT: That is age 23 to hit.

MARISHA: Uh-huh. That hits.

SAM: What were you doing up there?

MARISHA: Okay, probably up until now.

LAURA: Yeah, this is going to be the one.

MARISHA: This is going to be the one.

MATT: 20 points of slashing damage from one claw.

TALIESIN: Oh boy, here we go.

MATT: That is a 25 to hit.


MATT: You take another 16 points of slashing damage. And what happens is the claw begins to pull and drag you off the side of the neck and as it does, the head pulls back and one thing you see is just the teeth in the mouth open up, these icicles in the back of the throat, you have this up close look of the inside of Gelidon's mouth and it is just this frozen hellscape with this dull blue glow at the very base of the gullet before it disappears in the darkness and that is going to be a 28 to hit.

MARISHA: You just, last thing you hear is me go: Not again.

SAM: You're going to get swallowed? Oh no!

LAURA: You're going to get swallowed?

MARISHA: I don't know.

SAM: That changes things.

MATT: That is going to be--

LAURA: The head can reach that far back?

MARISHA: Did you say it was--

SAM: No, she used the claw.

MARISHA: Is it a bite? Was I grappled?

MATT: No, no, you weren't grappled.

MARISHA: I wasn't grappled.



MATT: I'm narrating the attack.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: That is-- (laughs) 17 points of piercing damage. Plus 16 points of cold damage.

TALIESIN: How you doin'?

TRAVIS: Where you at, where you at, where you at?

SAM: But she's not swallowed.

MATT: No, just, now you see her like chomped into Gelidon's mouth. You can see it crush into the sides of her body and leg. For a moment, all you can see is one arm and part of a leg and then as the teeth get pulled apart slightly, you see Beau like (grunting) pushing out of the mouth and then managing to pull out of the side and is holding on to the side of Gelidon's head now.

MARISHA: I'm like, holding onto like, her nostril.

MATT: There's blood all over her body. But the blood is now freezing to her from the sheer cold and proximity of Gelidon's mouth.

MARISHA: I have 17 hit points left.

MATT: There's blood-cicles beginning to drop and freeze off the sides of her arm.


MARISHA: One-seven, yeah.

MATT: "Blood-cicle." I haven't used that phrase ever. I like that. And Gelidon's going to fly 80 feet that way.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

SAM: To escape, oh no. We need to go on hot pursuit.

TALIESIN: You can--

MARISHA: It's okay. Do we want to go on, or what are we doing?

TRAVIS: I mean, dragon going away, very good. Going away with you in its mouth, very bad.

MATT: Lucien's turn, Lucien goes, "Well, that's a good turn of fate. Let him have her." He goes and puts the swords onto the side and is considering this a done battle.

TRAVIS: No, no, it is no, "Let her have her."

MATT: "Then someone go catch her."

ASHLEY: I'm going to start running.

LIAM: Are we still in turn order?

MARISHA: Are we still in initiative order?

MATT: We're still in initiative order here. With that, Lucien and Tyffial come out of their cover and begin to put as much distance between the dragon and them as they can. And so they're going to go ahead and start moving over this way.

MARISHA: Fucking kill Otis. I got the dragon, you guys kill the Tomb Takers.

SAM: I would love to kill Otis right now.

MATT: Fjord, it's your turn. You can see the dragon is now quite a distance away with Beauregard bloody and nearly frozen to its side.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's a real thing. "-- at an incredible pace. When you can cast this spell, as a bonus action on each of your turns," So what does Expeditious Retreat do?

LIAM: Speeds a person up.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: It takes some sort of action or a bonus action to--

MATT: It's a bonus action to cast, right? Or is it a reaction?

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah. I have Expeditious Retreat at 1st-level. So if my movement speed is 30 and I cast that as a bonus action, what does that get me, distance wise?

LAURA: 60 feet.

TRAVIS: It just doubles it like a dash?

MATT: It says, well, it says, "When you cast the spell, and then as a bonus action on each of your turns until the spell ends." Yeah, so it gives you dash. You get to move an additional 30 feet.

TALIESIN: So you could do, if you--

TRAVIS: So I could go 90 feet.

MATT: You could go 90 feet in one turn, yeah.

TRAVIS: I'll do that.

MATT: Okay. That gets you just off the map this way. But that's all of your movement, action, and bonus action.

TRAVIS: And about how far am I from--

MATT: You're about 70 feet.


SAM: About how far?

TRAVIS: 70 feet away. Okay. That's, yeah, that's all my turn. There's nothing else I can do. That's action and bonus action.

MATT: Yeah.


MATT: Okay, that finishes Fjord's go. Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Fuck, I'm not fast enough to get there.

SAM: Believe in yourself.

TALIESIN: (blows raspberry) I'm going to--

MATT: Ever so slightly this way as the battle is now shifting in that direction.

SAM: You're off the volume.

MARISHA: I do have options, just so everybody knows.


MARISHA: I have options.

SAM: You have options?


TALIESIN: I'm going to run. I'm going to run in the direction of the dragon.

MATT: Okay.


TRAVIS: Oh, that's way better.

TALIESIN: I assume I am nowhere near 60 feet away.

MATT: You're right on the cusp. Can try something, what do you want to try?

TALIESIN: Fuck, if I try it and I fail, we're fucked, is the problem.

MATT: Well.

TALIESIN: I'm right on the cusp of 60 feet from Beau?

MARISHA: Feel free to--

MATT: From the dragon, Beau's a little further, Beau's--

TALIESIN: Oh, then I'm going to fucking hold until I feel comfortable with the distance between me and Beau.

MATT: Okay. What are you holding?

TALIESIN: I'm going to hold Heal.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

MARISHA: Thank you.

MATT: All right. That finishes Caduceus' turn, Cree is going to go ahead and take a few steps back towards the others, but also is keeping an eye over there on the circumstances, like, you see keeping almost a bridge between the two groups. That finishes Cree's turn, Caleb.

LIAM: I'm going to just start bolting towards Beauregard. I'll use all of my movement in a diagonal line, straight towards Gelidon.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: And as I do, I will rip the catmint out of my pouch and I will throw my hand in a hucking motion and a spectral Frumpkin goes spinning in an arc towards Gelidon, 120 feet and turns into a giant cat claw on the way and I would like to grapple Beauregard off of the dragon.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make an attack on that.

LIAM: "A grasping hand can grasp a huge or smaller creature within five feet of it. If the target," that's if she's an enemy though, right? If she goes with it--

MATT: Well, a target. She goes with it, but that's the question for her.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Do you go with it or do you fight to stay?

LIAM: Do you want to be pulled off the dragon?

MARISHA: I don't know what's happening, but yes.

MATT: You just see this giant cat claw coming towards you.

MARISHA: I have plans to jump on my turn.

LIAM: Tell me what you want to do. I'm trying to, I'm going to try to envelop you in a hand.

MARISHA: Try it.

LIAM: Well, it's up to you if it's a roll or not.

MATT: Are you allowing it to happen or are you fighting it?

MARISHA: I'll allow it, yeah.

MATT: Okay, so without issue, the cat's claw reaches up, wraps around Beauregard and pulls. When it pulls, you hear this snapping sound. The blood that is pouring down Gelidon's neck, which right now is mostly Beauregard's has frozen to Beauregard's hand and arm and was what was keeping her aloft. So as the cat's claw pulls, she pulls off and the actual ice breaks off of your hand, your blood has now left behind this print of frozen dark crimson on the side of its throat. But you are currently held by the claw.


LIAM: And that's it, that's the end of my turn.

MATT: That's your turn.

TALIESIN: You can't start pulling her back or--

LIAM: I don't think so, I think on my next turn, I get 60 feet of movement on it.

MATT: Exactly. That brings us to Veth, and Yasha's after that.

SAM: I will say to Otis in Halfling: Come, help save my friend! And I will run 30 feet and then 60 feet. I think that brings me within range and I will fire a crossbow bolt.

MATT: 60 feet. Okay, so yeah, you dash over there. What's your range on your crossbow?

SAM: It's 30/120, but I have some feat that makes long range not impose a--

MATT: Sharpshooter, right? So yeah, you can go ahead and take the shot.

LIAM: Take a shot.

SAM: Ooh, three.

MATT: Goes wide.

SAM: Damn it.

MATT: The open air, too much blue. and the chaos with Beauregard. You just shoot angrily and--

SAM: I look to see if Otis is following.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

SAM: A persuasion check. 16 plus three?! When did I get plus three on persuasion?

TALIESIN: I hate to say this, but that's a skill roll, isn't it?

SAM: But I'm not--

MATT: He doesn't have exhaustion.

TALIESIN: Fuck yes, never mind.

MATT: He had the tea. Yeah.

SAM: 19.

MATT: Okay. Otis seems to be paying attention.

SAM: (gasping) (laughter) It's not Otis' turn, but Otis is definitely looking at you. Like, you know, cloak over, like. (heavy breathing)

SAM: Okay, okay.

MATT: All right, that finishes your turn. Yasha, you're up.

ASHLEY: Okay, so can I see Skingorger anywhere?

MATT: You would have to go search, it is lost in a powdered snow in a distance. That would be an after-combat search. It'll take you a while to re-find it.

ASHLEY: Okay. Well then.

SAM: (grunt of exertion)

ASHLEY: I'll just start running.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: And because I don't think I was hit on this round.

MATT: There you go, that's 50 feet there.

ASHLEY: I will rage.

MATT: Okay, bonus action to rage.

ASHLEY: (frustrated growl)

TALIESIN: (nervous noise)

ASHLEY: I can't do anything!

SAM: I Can't Do Anything: The Ashley Johnson Story. (laughter)

ASHLEY: No, I don't want that to be my story!

TALIESIN: Flying enemies.

MATT: Flying enemies are the bane of melee classes.

MARISHA: They're the worst.

ASHLEY: I know, I'm just wondering if, oh, oh, oh. Wait a minute, wait a minute.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay, I have a large lance.



ASHLEY: Okay, so I'm going to just going to try to chuck it. And reckless.

LIAM: Oh, I forgot about this lance here. (laughter)

MATT: D&D. (laughter) All right.

SAM: This eight-foot barbed lance on my back.

ASHLEY: Whoa, what's this? (laughter)

MARISHA: This has been in my inventory the whole time?

LIAM: It was under those herbs. (laughter)

SAM: I have a whole set of silverware, apparently, that I carry around with me wherever I--

LAURA: That you stole?

MATT: Is it a lance or javelin?

SAM: Ages ago, like four sets of silverware.

ASHLEY: It says "large lance" would that not-- If that doesn't work, I have another idea.

MATT: No, I'll allow it, I'll allow it. So you're doing reckless?

ASHLEY: I'm doing reckless.

MATT: So that'll make it a straight roll, as opposed to the disadvantage it would be.


MARISHA: Yeah, Yasha!

ASHLEY: Why not, why not, why not?

TALIESIN: Either a 20 or a one at this point.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Come on.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: Is it a 20?

ASHLEY: It's a 17.


ASHLEY: Plus anything?

MATT: Plus, whatever your attack bonus is.

ASHLEY: Oh my attack bonus?

MATT: Yeah, you still get your attack bonus.

ASHLEY: Which is my--

TRAVIS: Strength modifier.

ASHLEY: Strength modifier, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.

MATT: Okay, yeah, you hit.

ASHLEY: Okay, 21, 21.

MATT: Yeah, it's tired night, you hit.


MATT: So go ahead and roll damage for the lance. As you chuck it, as you run and just chuck it. You see it bending in the air as it goes wobbling.

SAM: Like Revenge Of The Nerds?

MATT: Yeah. (laughter)

ASHLEY: What do I roll for lance?

MATT: That's right, because you don't have the lance--

LIAM: Roll for lance.

MATT: Go ahead and roll, I think if I saw it earlier it was a d12, but I'll double check that.


MATT: d12.

ASHLEY: d12, okay.

LAURA: Wow, lance is a big--

MATT: I'll say do not add your strength modifier to it. Just your rage damage, just because you're not--

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It's just a little bit of a weird circumstance, lances aren't necessarily meant to be thrown, but I'm allowing it and I'm just shifting that. So just roll the d12 and then add your rage damage.


SAM: How do you want to do this?

MARISHA: I hope so. How epic.

ASHLEY: That would be seven.

MATT: Seven damage.

LAURA: Woo-hoo! Worth it.

SAM: Damn!

MATT: Awesome, so it just sticks into its chest and you see it now, it gets a good, like, two, three feet in and it's now just sticking out and the dragon. (growling) (roaring) (wings flapping) All right, does that finish your turn?

ASHLEY: Do I get a second hit?

TRAVIS: With what?

MARISHA: With my other lance!

LIAM: You just had an Olympic moment.

ASHLEY: Oh, oh, hold on. I have the fire grenades. Can I try to just--

MATT: I will-- nah, nah. (laughter)

LIAM: Next round, Nydoorin.

MATT: Next round, though.

ASHLEY: I just saw it after.

MATT: No, good call. I appreciate the negotiation.

TRAVIS: I throw my bag. (laughter)

MATT: Fuck you, dragon!

TRAVIS: (quick impacts)

MATT: I love it. All right, that finishes Yasha's go. Beauregard and Jester, you guys are up.

MARISHA: Okay, I'm going to get purchase on the cat paw a little bit, surf it. And I enacted my Maelstrom Gloves at the top of this.

MATT: Exactly, so you still have a 20-foot distance.

MARISHA: While I'm at this 20-foot distance, I'm going to (punches) with my lightning. So for the lightning, yeah, those should both hit. That is a 20 for the first one and a 23 for the second.

MATT: Both hit.


SAM: You guys ever get that feeling when we're playing, where like, suddenly, you're like, "Ah, fuck, I hope this doesn't end."



MARISHA: All the time.

SAM: I just had one of those.

MARISHA: Okay, that's okay, 12 for the first one.

MATT: All right, 12 damage.

MARISHA: And 10 for the second.

MATT: 10 for the second, all righty.

MARISHA: So 22 total. Yeah, pop, pop, why not?

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: Why not?

SAM: Wait, you can attack from there?

LAURA: Yeah, she's got her--

MARISHA: I got my lightning gloves.

MATT: She's shadow boxing and with each punch, a bolt of energy, like electricity, goes (sparking)

LAURA: Because she's Beau, Beau, Beau, Beau, Beau.

MARISHA: Fuckin' Beau, fuckin' Beauregard, That's a fuckin' natural 20!

MATT: Yeah!


MARISHA: And a 17.

TRAVIS: That is a record. It's got to be.

MATT: You guys are rolling crazy in this. This is nuts.

MARISHA: So they both hit for the natural 20. That's good, that is a six on that roll. So 12 plus another six, so, 18 damage for the crit.

MATT: Nice.

MARISHA: And then for the other one, that's a seven. So that is 13 damage.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: This means you have to have the mustache forever.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: All right.

MATT: That finish your turn?

LIAM: That's our lucky charm?

MARISHA: And then--

LIAM: No deal.


MARISHA: How far away am I from Caduceus?

MATT: You're probably a good 50 or so feet from him. 55 now.

TALIESIN: Oh, 50 feet now?

MATT: Now you would be, yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh, I'm going to let loose.

MATT: Since the claw pulled her away.

TALIESIN: Yeah, it feels about right, I'm letting loose then.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: You go up 80.

MARISHA: I go up 80.

SAM: 80?!

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: I was going to drop out of this, but now I'm going to stay.

LAURA: His Heal's better than my Heal.

TRAVIS: No, baby.

LIAM: It's because he practiced.

TALIESIN: Don't let it ride too long. That was a big spell; I don't have a lot left. I got lots of the little shit.

MARISHA: Let's kill an ancient dragon.

SAM: I love the guilt clerics.

LIAM: You're fighting an ancient dragon. You're fighting an ancient dragon, that's what it's for.

MATT: Caduceus, just confirming, 80 as opposed to 70? Because this spell heals 70.

TALIESIN: I was out of 6th-level spells, so I had to burn my seventh.

MATT: Oh, so you put it up higher? You got it, okay.

MARISHA: Thanks, dude, I won't die, I promise.

MATT: Finish your turn?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Okay, as you're like, "Yeah, Caduceus!" Caduceus, you watch as the tail comes swinging around from behind Beauregard. That is going to a 28 to hit.

TRAVIS: Please T-ball off her.

MARISHA: Here we go!

TALIESIN: Is it you or the hand that is--



LIAM: I mean, I have her grappled, but I think the fact that you stood up and surfed on that kind of fudges that.

MATT: 24 points of bludgeoning damage and I would like you to make a strength saving throw.

MARISHA: Sure it's not dex?

MATT: I'm sure, this is about holding on.


MARISHA: That's a two.

MATT: So you're going, "Thanks, Caduceus!" (laughter) And just gets baseball batted off. The cat's claw is just there and you just see this light blue blur. The streaks go (quick whoosh), and Beau is just like, full on, "Ya-hooey!" off the side.

MARISHA: Which way am I getting flung?

MATT: This way.

MARISHA: All right.

MATT: And the tail swung.

LIAM: Hi, doggy, you're my favorite customer. (laughter)

SAM: Can I do a reaction Feather Fall?

MATT: You can.

SAM: I will do a reaction Feather Fall.

MATT: So you (whoosh) and begin gliding softly through the air at this odd angle.

MARISHA: I guess I wouldn't get a chance to take my reaction on him, no, no, no. Because he hit me. Never mind.

MATT: No, no, no, no, no. Mm-mm.

TRAVIS: That's fuckin'--

MATT: So you're just like, your vision is blurred. The world is just this kaleidoscope of images and suddenly you just softly pillow land in soft snow.

MARISHA: Just do a snow angel.

MATT: (laughs) All right, that finishes--

MARISHA: And nod.

MATT: -- your go. Jester.

LAURA: I guess I'll run for it as much as I can.

MATT: All righty, that puts you-- 30, that's as close as you can get there on one.

LAURA: Does it feel about 120 feet?

MATT: You don't know.

LAURA: I don't know, because Fjord ran 90.

TALIESIN: I mean--

MATT: It looks like it's a little far.

LAURA: It seems far. I don't think I can do it.

TRAVIS: It's right on the cusp.

LAURA: We're not going to try to keep attacking this thing.

TRAVIS: If it's going to leave, we're going to let it.

ASHLEY: I summoned this bitch, we're going to end her! (laughter)

MATT: I love you, Ashley Johnson.

LAURA: Does she look like she's bleeding a lot?

MATT: Looks like she's pretty damn hurt, yeah.

LAURA: Really?

TRAVIS: "Pretty damn hurt" ain't rough, though.

MATT: You're not very familiar with dragon anatomy, you're not sure if it's, like, (lightly) pretty hurt, or like (intensely) pretty hurt, or like (seriously) pretty hurt.

LAURA: I'm going to try to Dimension Door inside of it. No, I'm just kidding.

LIAM: Bye.

TRAVIS: Most of the blood on it is from other people.

MATT: Some of it is, yeah. Whatchu doing, Jester?

LAURA: I'm going to-- (lip flapping) I'm going to take stock and look around and see if anybody else is around me that's hurt.

MATT: Otis is looking a little hurt.

SAM: Otis.

TRAVIS: (whispers) This is your chance.

SAM: Let me heal you, Otis.

LAURA: I know, I know.

TRAVIS: Inflict Wounds! (laughter)

MATT: Are you just taking stock?

LAURA: I'm just going to stop running and take stock.

MATT: It's now Gelidon's turn. Gelidon, now absolved of all the recent attacks, just goes into a full run or full fly, 160 feet away and is just in full flight mode now. (flapping wings receding)

ASHLEY: Yeah, you run!

MATT: You hear the distant roar. (roaring) echo through the nearby valley and just watch the image of the white dragon begin to vanish into the horizon. And that's where we're going to take a break.

ALL: Oh!

ASHLEY: Oh my god, we haven't even taken a break yet.


MATT: Nope. That was a full-on battle I wasn't expecting to happen. Look at you, yeah.

TRAVIS: That was awesome.


LAURA: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: I will admit I was--

LIAM: Nothing to show for it.

TALIESIN: -- really hoping we were going to down that thing.

TRAVIS: Ancient white dragon.

LAURA: I know, right?

TALIESIN: We did okay.

TRAVIS: We got to see exactly what they can do.

ASHLEY: That was a good practice.

TALIESIN: That was really helpful.

MATT: Interesting intel came out of that.

LIAM: Yeah, legendary action is no longer a surprise.


TRAVIS: Had the numbers.

MATT: We'll be back here in a few minutes. We're going to take this break, so we'll see you guys here shortly.


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Part II[]

MATT: And welcome back. So, as you all stand there, spread about the snow, spattered with blood and rock, you can see the distant shape of Gelidon, the Nightmare in Ivory, (wings flapping) vanishing into the horizon of the gray and blue sky. Beauregard, you slowly pull yourself up from the soft snow, still not as hurt as you were earlier, but still just reeling from the final throes of that dragon battle. The rest of you take stock of the immediate end of the conflict, look around. What do you do?

LIAM: Giant cat hand goes (whoosh) wiping snow off of your butt.

MARISHA: Thank you, thank you.

SAM: Just your butt.

LAURA: Just the butt.

LIAM: All of it, all of it.

TALIESIN: Okay, that was pretty scary. Off of the Beau.

SAM: Yasha, do you need help finding your little swordy?

ASHLEY: (sighs) If you wouldn't mind.

TALIESIN: I can help. Hold on. Detect Magic.

ASHLEY: No, it's Skingorger.

LAURA: Is it not magical?

TALIESIN: Still magical.

ASHLEY: Skingorger is--

MATT: Skingorger's magical, yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah, they're all magical.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: Okay. It doesn't take long. It is buried in the snow. The way it impacted and landed would've been very difficult to find.


MATT: But you do manage to go ahead and metal-detect it out of the powder.

ASHLEY: I definitely would not have found this without you, so thank you.

TALIESIN: I needed to take my mind off things for a minute, if that's okay. The walk was nice.

LIAM: We want to take a breather here for a little bit?

TALIESIN: That'd be--

LIAM: No small task.

TRAVIS: I think so. I think it's important to ask a question, though. "Just let her have her"? You were just going to let the dragon go off with our friend? Is that the arrangement that we have?

MATT: "Our arrangement didn't necessarily involve having to save someone."

TRAVIS: My goodness. I seem to have been operating under the wrong impression. (chuckles) Fair enough.

MATT: "Don't act like you aren't working towards our demise every night."

LAURA: What? What are you talking about?


MATT: (wheezes) "Look, we can play, and dance, and continue this masquerade as long as we want, but we've all got things to hide. I'm just being honest. No offense. I have no reason to like you, you've no reason to like me, either."

MARISHA: Yeah, that's fair.

MATT: "Right, so?"

LIAM: Yes.

MATT: "If it meant our survival or yours, I'm just going to make a decision in the moment. I hope you can respect that. Would you've done the same for me?

MARISHA: I can. I guess it would've depended on the circumstance.

LIAM: It's a little more complicated for us on our end, but--

MARISHA: Exactly.

LIAM: You're right, at least on surface level, we are not friends.

MATT: "But we survived a fucking white dragon. Want ask you about that sometime. It's not often they seem to be familiar."

LAURA: We make friends everywhere we go.

MATT: "I can tell. You are just a bunch of brightened stars in the sky."

TRAVIS: Do we need to take a moment to collect ourselves before we (laughs)--

LIAM: I would love to.

TRAVIS: -- start our day?

LIAM: I would love to.

TRAVIS: Well, we have been going for four hours, so it's all right.

MATT: "You're a late riser."

LIAM: (sighs)

MATT: "So we're taking a moment?"

SAM: Yeah, I guess so.

LIAM: Yes, yes, please.

MATT: "All right." So you guys take a short rest.


TRAVIS: I'll go over to Jester, and I'll give her a kiss.

SAM: Oh!

TRAVIS: Hey, thank you.

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: Oh well, you know, anything for my Fjord.

TRAVIS: What? I'm mad for her.

SAM: Where did that--? I-- re-- what--?

TRAVIS: I just leave Veth stuck stammering in the snow.

SAM: That's a thing now? Did you--? Have you--? Have you kissed him often?

LAURA: No. That was the first time he ever kissed me.

SAM: Just now?

LAURA: Just then, you witnessed it.

SAM: That was such a anticlimactic--

LAURA: Apparently he's mad for me.

SAM: And just said it like that?

LAURA: Guess so, weird.

SAM: Matter-of-factly?

LAURA: I know.

SAM: Are you still mad for him? That's amazing.

LAURA: Yeah, it's pretty great.

SAM: Wow. Are you steadies?

LAURA: I don't know!

SAM: Well, you have to define it.


SAM: You have to be upfront with your feelings and with your status, or else someone else might come in, and try to sweep him off his feet.

LAURA: Like you?

SAM: I could if I wanted to.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: I have no doubt about that, Veth. (laughter)

SAM: But I'm a married woman. And his--

TRAVIS: First gear, second gear, third gear.

SAM: -- very lanky. That's amazing, exciting for you.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Everyone's finding love.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: I'd like to think that it was my advice that did it.

LAURA: It's all you.

SAM: Thank you.

TRAVIS: How is Otis looking in all this?

MATT: Hmm?


MATT: He's actually sitting maybe 10 feet from Lucien, just on the ground, looks like he's chewing on a piece of-- could be tree bark, could be old jerky. It's hard to say. I mean, most of them are still clustered. They, much like you guys, keep to your own, they keep to their own.

TRAVIS: Not going to lie. The first time we fought an ancient white dragon, pretty big for us. How about you?

MATT: (as Lucien) "That was the first time we've fought an ancient white dragon, correct?" The rest of them look at each other, (as Otis) "Yeah, I've never, never really seen one up close or afar. Never seen one, never seen one."

TRAVIS: Yep, handled it well, handled it well.

MATT: Zoran's just like, "Didn't keep flying off, I would have fucking taken his head off, I would." Puts his maul on the ground. (thumping) And it was still flaming, it like (sizzling) out in the snow.

TRAVIS: It's very impressive. I can tell you, our friend, Yasha, was experiencing the same sort of frustration. Next time, we'll herd it towards you.

ASHLEY: It's frustrating.

MATT: (as Zoran) "Yeah."

ASHLEY: You get this close.

MATT: "Yeah." Lucien, at this point, goes, "See this? This is why it was good we worked together." I mean, if we'd gone on our own-- Actually, we would have probably not had a problem with the dragon, but if you'd gone on your own, that could have ended very differently. Well done."

LAURA: Thanks for not attacking us while she was also doing it.

MATT: "You know, thank you for the same."


MATT: "So, when you're rested and ready, shall we see if we can finish out the day and--"

SAM: Yes.

MATT: "Certainly. Follow suit. Keep your eyes peeled." And he continues walking and the rest of them follow suit, and continuing in the direction you were.

TRAVIS: As we start moving, I'll walk up over next to Caleb, and as quietly as I can, but knowing that we're probably being listened to at any moment, just sort of side mouth say, "Any complications during that encounter?"

LIAM: You mean new wrinkles?

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Nothing that I can ascertain as of yet. A lot on our plates as it is.

TRAVIS: Very true.

LIAM: All right, one foot in front of the other.

MATT: Okay. Caduceus and, I'd say-- yeah, just Caduceus. You glance. As everyone's getting to leave, you're holding up the back, and you glance behind you, see the faint shape of something moving through the snow behind you. Make a perception check.

MARISHA: Is it Dagen? Oh boy, yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: God, my eyesight's going. 22.

MATT: 22, hard to make out the shape. It's low enough and consistent enough, and based on previous discussion, you gather it's probably Dagen trailing you guys, and trying to keep up best he can.

TRAVIS: He's just going--

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Yeah, you can imagine what he just witnessed.

TRAVIS: Do I really want to get paid?

TALIESIN: We, uh... We should have a conversation tonight about how things are going to go. Nothing scary or nothing, but I don't know. How are we going to prepare for what's coming?

MARISHA: Feels less like something you prepare for and more like something you have caveats for, rip-cords.

TRAVIS: What would those be?

MARISHA: If Caleb and I turn on you, you kill us.

TRAVIS: Oh, those kind of ripcords.

LAURA: I have an idea. I don't know if it will work, but I feel like whatever it is that's put a mark on you, is pretty evil, right? It doesn't feel good.

LIAM: Doesn't feel like anything as of yet.

LAURA: I'm going to walk up next to Caleb and put my hand on his shoulder, where it is. Do you want me to try this or do you want--?

LIAM: Yeah, I trust you.

LAURA: And I'm going to try to cast Dispel Evil and Good.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: "Protects you from creatures beyond the material plane." And there's one called Dismissal, which can send a creature that has come from another plane away.

MATT: Correct, yeah, I see it.

LAURA: So I'm wondering if it can do something like that.

MATT: As you reach out, and you can see the faint divine glow around your Traveler's holy symbol begin to swell within your torso and shoulders, and then shoot to the hand onto his shoulder. You watch as Caleb, the right side of his arm just (vibration) pulses in this wave, this almost drifting foam bubble that (poof) disperses.

LAURA: Did it feel like anything?

LIAM: Did it feel like anything?

MATT: Didn't feel like anything, necessarily.

LIAM: It's pretty cold out here, but that's fine. And I just start--

TALIESIN: Find out--

MARISHA: What they want.

TALIESIN: Maybe we'll find out later.

MARISHA: Yeah, are they watching?

TALIESIN: Let's get warm.

MATT: They're not at the moment paying attention. They're all looking forward.


LIAM: So itchy.

MATT: It's still there.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: (sighs)

MATT: It's a good call, but unfortunately, little bit outside the realm of what that spell can affect.

TALIESIN: Maybe we use--

MATT: Worth a shot.

LAURA: It was a high level. Thought that it had a good chance. Guess not.

LIAM: Don't kick yourself.

TALIESIN: Instead of being tailed, maybe we should send somebody ahead.

MARISHA: How do you mean?

TALIESIN: Well, we don't want to say it out loud. If we had somebody we could send ahead to civilization to try and get the word out? If only one of us could get away for a little bit.

TRAVIS: You mean in the open while we're walking?

TALIESIN: Yeah, like somebody who really understood the terrain and knew how to move through it really quickly and...



TALIESIN: I'm not good at this, I don't know.

SAM: No, no, we get it.

TALIESIN: Oh, okay.

SAM: We get it, we get it. We got it, we got it.

TALIESIN: Really felt like I was missing the mark there.

LAURA: Like I could (barely audible) polymorph them?

TRAVIS: No, nope, nope. Like you could send word to him and say, "Go on ahead!"

SAM: Where would we want--

LAURA: Send a message?

SAM: Where would we want to see ahead of us?

TALIESIN: Civilization, somewhere to maybe rally people.

SAM: Civilization?

ASHLEY: Are you talking about--

SAM: Is there civilization?

ASHLEY: -- Dagen?

MARISHA: In Aeor? Is that what you're talking about?

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: The only thing that would be around there is Essek.

TRAVIS: Yeah, there's nothing on the map between A2 and Aeor and their little entrances.

TALIESIN: Essek might-- maybe just seeing a person whose seen what we've seen might be enough to get them moving.

LAURA: So send him to Essek?

TALIESIN: I don't know. It might get Essek to move.

LAURA: I feel like the only option there to get him fast is to polymorph him and try to send him ahead. I can't teleport him.

TALIESIN: You can-- he can move fine. He's fast, the only reason I think he's going slow is 'cause we're slow.

LAURA: I could polymorph him and he could get ahead.

TALIESIN: You really want to polymorph him really bad.

LAURA: Well, you know.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: That might be a little obvi though.

TALIESIN: Yeah, need to keep this quiet.

TRAVIS: And I think he works exclusively for the Empire, right? No?


TALIESIN: No, I don't think so.


TRAVIS: For both--


TRAVIS: -- the Dynasty and the Empire?

LAURA: Yeah, he's--

TALIESIN: Hardly matters right now, but yeah, I think both.

TRAVIS: Just don't want to send an Empire guy to a Dynasty outpost. It'll be like, "Bye."

TALIESIN: We can send word ahead.

TRAVIS: Just thinking out loud.

TALIESIN: Keeping an eye on everything, making sure it doesn't look like-- I'm trying to keep an eye out. I know that's impossible.

MATT: I understand, okay. Do you guys continue on for the remainder of the day?

LAURA: I can do it.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: On a path with the inevitable.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: It's not a bad idea.

MATT: Pushing forward, you continue on for the rest of your jaunt eastward. Eventually, the light of day begins to fade.

LAURA: Can I, before we did all that?

MATT: Yeah. That's what I was asking about.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Can I at least send a message back to Dagen?

MATT: Sure.

SAM: Do you have to make noise to send a message or is it telepathic?

MATT: It says it's verbal components, right?

LAURA: Yeah, I feel like...

MATT: Don't think it's--

LAURA: It's verbal.

MATT: I think it's spoken, it's verbal, it's part of the spell.

SAM: Oh, okay.

TALIESIN: We can...

SAM: Bathroom break?

LAURA: What? (giggles)

SAM: Do you want to go?

TRAVIS: You've been saying how much you need to--

SAM: Go over there and pee, and then, away from us.

LAURA: Sure, I'll go pee. Okay, bye.

TALIESIN: We can just clump, but okay.

TRAVIS: In the flat snowy tundra.

LAURA: Okay, I'll go stand over here and sit down in the snow, so it looks like I'm peeing.

LIAM: I cast Widogast's Web of Fire-- Wall of Fire, not Widogast, just Wall of Fire, and make a curtain of fire, so that everyone doesn't have to watch Jester pee.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: That's noticeable now, okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LIAM: You're peeing, though.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm totally peeing.

MATT: The Tomb Takers do stop and turn, and there is like a brief reaction where from their perspective, forced perspective, it looks like you just incinerated one of your friends. (laughter)

LIAM: Tinkle break, tinkle break.

MATT: "It took a second, but I gathered."

LIAM: Eyes forward, please.

LAURA: I'll send a message to Dagen while I'm... I'm actually going to pee, just to make it look like I'm talking to myself while I'm peeing.

MATT: You got it.

LAURA: Just in case they're watching me.

MATT: We have a history in D&D of having characters talking to things while they're using the bathroom, so it works out great.

TRAVIS: Best conversations.

LAURA: Because you travel a lot faster, we're wondering if you could get to the east side of Aeor to give a message? Give word ahead. Fuck. (laughter)

MATT: (as Dagen) "Could you pay me before? No disrespect, but that was a dragon."

LAURA: Right, do I remember how much we still owe him?

MATT: You still owe him 2,000 gold upon arrival at Aeor.


LAURA: 2,000 gold, right.

MATT: He's become the $2 kid from "Better Off Dead".

LAURA: Right, right, right, right.

MATT: Much friendlier than him, but.

LAURA: Okay, I'll finish peeing and catch up with the rest of the group. I don't have that much.

SAM: Everything come out okay?

LAURA: Yep, peed real good.

TALIESIN: It's 200 platinum, right?

LAURA: It was an expensive pee though.

MARISHA: I've got a hundred platinum I can toss. I toss a hundred platinum.

LAURA: You guys got it covered?

MARISHA: Should we hide it, and he can pick it up?

LAURA: Yeah. That's what I imagined, we just drop it on the path, but with a note also to say like... To give to Essek maybe.

TALIESIN: This is going to be really hard to do without being noticed, let's just...

LAURA: We just going to try it. They're ahead of us.

LAURA: They're not--

SAM: -- our team.

LAURA: They said they were off ahead of us. We're just trailing them in the path now.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: I sleight of hand that shit.

LIAM: Just put that red windshield scraper right down in the snow.

LAURA: Plus, I'm constantly drawing in my sketchbook, it's not like that's completely out of the ordinary.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: So in my sketchbook, I'm going to write a note to Essek to let him know everything that's going on and you know, and just say why we need his help, and what we're afraid-- I don't know what the fuck I'm writing.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: You're afraid?

LAURA: We don't know want them to bring back the whole city area, the Cognouzum, and there's a demony thing that's out in the Astral Sea, and--

SAM: You're giving him all the downlow.

LAURA: I'm just giving it. I'm just rambling in words.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And then, I'm going to rip it off and put it in a little pouch.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Tell him to message you when he gets it. Essek. (chuckles)

LAURA: Message me when you get this.

SAM: (laughs) Okay, here, give me the stuff, I'll just set it somewhere.

LAURA: I'm doing this all with a-sleight of hand so I can try to be subtle about putting it in a little baggy.

MATT: Then go ahead and roll sleight of hand for me, if you don't mind.

LAURA: Sure. 18!

MATT: 18, nice. You drop the bag. Oh wait, I'm dropping the bag? I thought I was giving the-- Sure, I'll drop the bag. (chuckles)

SAM: You have the money, everyone?

LAURA: I assume everybody gave me the money as well.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Okay. So you placed the note inside the bag? Are you handing it off to-- Is that just you putting the note in there?

LAURA: That was just going to be me putting the note in the bag.

MATT: Okay, okay, now, I'm clarifying, I'm not trying to put actions in your--

LAURA: Okay, I was just putting the note in the bag, and then, I--

MATT: You feel pretty solid.

LAURA: Okay, okay.

MATT: It's a common action to put things in bags.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Roll for bags.

LAURA: Okay, cool, cool, cool.

SAM: I'll grab the bag.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: And the money pouch, and sleight of handily...

LAURA: And you're low in the snow, so it's easier for you to do things without being noticed.

SAM: I think I had to stoop over and retie my boot. While I'm down there, just tuck it into the snow and--

MATT: All right, sleight of hand check.

SAM: Okay. Ooh, terrible, 18. Oh wait, no, I have--

MATT: You have Reliable Talent.

SAM: Reliable Talent, 25.

MATT: (laughs) "Ooh, terrible! 25." You feel pretty confident that you sufficiently hid that in the snow.

ASHLEY: Is he going to find it?

LAURA: It's Dagen, he can find everything. He's super tracky.

TALIESIN: He's literally on our trail.

SAM: Oh boy, did we just Fargo all the money?

TALIESIN: We'll be fine.

LIAM: (like Fargo) Oh yah. Campaign three party'll find that.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

MATT: All right.


MATT: So you continue on.

LIAM: The heck do you mean?

TRAVIS: With the windshield scraper.

MARISHA: Who's Es-seek?

LAURA: Oh, he's rolling, he's rolling.

MATT: You continue on for the rest of the day.

SAM: To be clear--

MATT: Yes.

SAM: Sleight of hand to make sure they weren't looking, but I wasn't trying to hide it so that no one would ever find it.

MATT: No, I understand that. I understand that. That's just a cursory roll.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure.

TRAVIS: Sure, sure.

ASHLEY: Sure, sure, sure.

MATT: Dusk does come, and you watch as the Tomb Takers stop their progress. Turning around, Lucien goes, "All right, we're real close. So the choice is either we push on, and I'd say about maybe two, three hours more we might make our destination, or if you're wishing for one more night of comfort, which isn't a bad thing either, we can take that, too."

LIAM: I think some in our group are feeling a little peaked. Better if we take it fresh.

MATT: "Very well. So you're the man with the mansion."

LIAM: Sure, I just want to find a good spot. Oh, right here, okay.

LAURA: (giggles)

LIAM: (whooshing)

MATT: All right, with that, you all enter to scatter about your evening of rest. What would you like to do?

TRAVIS: The same thing as last night?

SAM: Anybody need any... Do we need to call anyone or send word anywhere?

LAURA: When we get alone, I would send another message to Dagen to see if he got it.

MATT: Yeah, to expedite this, we don't even have to role play again the same scenario. You guys all, they go to, what I assume is the same room that was prepared the night before.

LAURA: You're checking to make sure we got no invisible orbs around us.

TRAVIS: No, I'm not doing that.

SAM: It's there.


LAURA: (sighs)

ASHLEY: They're always listening to everything.

TRAVIS: I mean, if we find it, and Yasha dispels it, it'll come right back.


TRAVIS: He did it three times in one night. That's a lot.

MATT: But dinner is had, and then eventually you all separate to... They separate to their chambers, and you guys can separate to yours, or like you did the night before, all cluster in the one. What would you like to do?

TALIESIN: Let's cluster.

TRAVIS: I think we're clustering. I'm obviously going to be doing sleep-monitoring on you two.

SAM: Oh yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah.

MARISHA: Sleep-monitoring, okay.

TRAVIS: Or do we just keep you awake?

LAURA: No, they need to sleep.

MARISHA: I would like to sleep.

TALIESIN: Okay, yeah.

MARISHA: I got frozen to the side of a dragon today.

TRAVIS: Sure, sure, sure. We'll just see if you come out of it with a second merit badge or not.

MARISHA: (sighs)

MATT: Any other business to handle before you sleep tonight?

SAM: Before we go to sleep, I'll just quietly go over to Jester and say: I have this, well, I have one extra of these. Got it a while back. It's supposed to make your sexual experience very--

LAURA: Oh god.

SAM: -- sort of heightened. I haven't used it yet. I gave one to my husband, but I have it. I'm giving it to you, just in case. I want your first time to be memorable. It's tiger blood or something, so.

LAURA: It's just a little vial?

SAM: It's oil, it's oil. I don't know, I think--

LAURA: Where do you put it?

SAM: I think you're supposed to rub it on your bits or maybe drink it? I didn't really get instructions.

LAURA: That's a big difference! Nott! Veth!

SAM: You'll figure it out.

MARISHA: Is Essek--

LAURA: Is there any fine print on the bottle?

SAM: DM, is there any instruction?

LAURA: On the--

MATT: There is not.

SAM: I think it's for drinking. I wrote down "sex potion," so that means drinking, I think.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

SAM: We'll see.

LAURA: Great, seems safe.

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: Thanks, I'm sure I'll need it. (whistles)

MARISHA: Caduceus.

LAURA: Thank you.

SAM: You're welcome.

MATT: So you can write--

LAURA: Sex potion.

MATT: Sex potion in your inventory.

SAM: I'm deleting it from mine. (laughter)

MARISHA: Can this be used to our benefit?

TRAVIS: What are you guys talking about?

TALIESIN: I'm going to run a-- I'm going to do a Commune before we sleep.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I was going to ask about Essek. Maybe the eyes, anything else? Dagen, maybe?

LAURA: I'm going to send a message to Dagen.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Actually, hold on one second.


TALIESIN: I can find out if Dagen already got the money.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

MARISHA: But we might be able to use that third question, though.


MARISHA: For something bigger.

TALIESIN: That's fair.

LAURA: Yeah, I'll just send a message to Dagen, Hey, did you find the pouch? Are you on your way? How's it going? You're not just going to take the money and run, right?

MATT: "I received it, don't worry. Note read, money here. I mean, it's a long way back, so... to your friend."

SAM: Nice.

MATT: That's what you heard.

LAURA: Such a good guy.

ASHLEY: Such a good guy.

MATT: All right, and you're going to Commune, you said?

TALIESIN: Yeah, does anyone got a third question?

TRAVIS: They're yes or no, right?



LAURA: Do you drink this potion or... (laughter)

TALIESIN: I think it's topical. It looks topical, it's very viscous.

TRAVIS: What are your questions so far?

TALIESIN: Is Essek planning on helping us? Can the eyes on Beau and Caleb be used against us?

LIAM: Do the Tomb Takers intend to, just confirm it, use us as some sort of sacrifice.


TALIESIN: See if it works, I'm going for it.

MATT: Okay. Casting Commune.

TALIESIN: Does Essek plan on helping us at the moment?

MATT: As you return to the gentle mind palace of the-- (laughs) the Wild Mother, if you will.

TALIESIN: Mind forest.

MATT: Mind forest in this one. So what's the question, one more time, to clarify? What's the question, one more time to clarify?

TALIESIN: At the moment, does Essek plan on helping us?

MATT: You see this distant star that twinkles, and when it does, you feel a sense of safety and familiarity that would confirm a yes.


TALIESIN: Can the eyes that have marked Beau and Caleb be used against us?

MATT: The gentle seaside fog thickens and you're left with a sense of uncertainty.


MATT: Not very clear.

TALIESIN: Do the Tomb Takers plan on sacrificing any of us once we reach our destination?

MATT: There's a pause, like even her vision is challenged, but the cold ocean breeze comes through back into the jungle space where you're sitting, to let you feel like the answer is no.

TALIESIN: Kind of no. Interesting.

TRAVIS: We're followers.


LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Maybe we're vessels. That's what I got.

LAURA: Can I try a Commune, too?

MATT: Sure.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to spend 10 minutes (laughs) sending a message, setting up a bunch of little stuff and just being like: Hey, Artie, come here. I have some questions to ask you.

MATT: As you glance over to your left as you're saying that absentmindedly, you look to your left and he's sitting on the floor next to you and goes, "Yes, Jester, what can I do for you?" And you all see him arrive as well. And you're like, what the fuck? Her Commune's a little more direct. (laughter)

LAURA: Look, look. Look at Beau's hand, look at Caleb's shoulder.

MATT: "Right, that is very curious.

LAURA: Do you think--

MATT: "And frightening."

LAURA: That that's something that we can reverse?

MATT: "Mm, I'm certain there's probably a way."

LAURA: Is it something at our disposal now?

MATT: "Probably not. I mean, look at him. I don't know where it's from. Hmm!"

LAURA: It's from... It's from the Eyes of Nine, dude.

MATT: "No, I figured that. I'm just saying, I don't know the scenario around its connection." (laughter) "I'm an Archfey, I'm not an omniscient being."

LAURA: Oh, oh, okay, what do you think? What do you think? Is there a way--

MARISHA: Useless.


LAURA: Based on some, like, well, I don't know, knowledge that you have, do you think there's a way we could use these markings to our advantage?

MATT: "Here's the thing. I have been many places and seen many things, terrible and wonderful. This? This creeps me right out."

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: "I, unfortunately, don't have much to add. I'd like to, I will, and I'm watching and I'm genuinely a little disturbed and worried for all of you. But, ah, this is weird."

LAURA: This is weird.

MATT: "Beyond my bailiwick, sorry."

LAURA: Okay, well, we're heading into, you know, the butthole of it all. So, really have our back here because I don't know what Lucien is planning, but I think it's something really terrible.

MATT: "(sighs) Well, if you can suss out what it is he wants of you, that would be useful."

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "Wish I could be more help."

LAURA: Thank you.

MATT: "Yeah, I'll be watching."

TRAVIS: Did you say the word bailiwick?

MATT: Yeah. (laughter) Area of expertise.

TRAVIS: I know what that word means. (laughter)

MATT: You all blink in unison and he's gone. Like a forced blink. It's a little odd.



TALIESIN: That's interesting. I don't know, I might have a... Might have a crazy idea. We'll see how it goes.

LAURA: Why don't you tell us what the idea is, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: I'm just worried. I feel like we're being, I'm not used to this level of nervousness. It's really getting to me.

MARISHA: Do charades.

TRAVIS: Do you want me to look--

LAURA: Or write it down and pass it around, because--

TALIESIN: I'm terrible at charades, and my handwriting's really bad. But as half of you know.

MARISHA: Pictographs.

SAM: Mummenschanz.

ASHLEY: Sounds like.

TALIESIN: So, if we have to, can we take the thing we have and put it somewhere where it really can't be gotten to anytime soon on a... Just like a little.

LIAM: I can send a thing on its way.

TALIESIN: If we have to pretty quickly.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah. If you want to give me either my amber back or the bag with the amber in it, I could very quickly.

LAURA: At any moment do it?

LIAM: Yeah, mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll give him his amber.

MATT: You look down, and your bag of holding is missing.

MARISHA: Wait, what? Wait, what?


SAM: I'm sorry?


SAM: When he was behind you?

MARISHA: Motherfucker. Motherfucker.

LAURA: Are they still in the tower?

SAM: I should've killed that little fucker.

TALIESIN: They are. We can send some cats to take it back.

SAM: Knock on their door.

MARISHA: Oh, cats. The cats.

LAURA: They might be out of the tower.

SAM: Let's go kill them. Get the cats to steal it.

MARISHA: Get the cat to steal it back.

SAM: Frumpkin's mission.

MARISHA: Get the cats, get the cats, get the cats, get the cats.

SAM: Frumpkin's Mission: Impossible.

TRAVIS: They might not even be in the tower.

LAURA: They might be gone.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: Let's go to their rooms. Wait, no.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

SAM: Have the cats go look. (gasps)

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't want another fucking Vess DeRogna situation.

TRAVIS: I'll ring the rope.

SAM: Toto, Sprocket. (laughter)

MATT: (meowing)

LAURA: Mittens.

MARISHA: I'll get Mittens, Mittens is slow as fuck.

TRAVIS: I'm running out of the room and shouting, "Down," and going straight down to the bottom, just in case they left and heading out the door of the--

MATT: Make a perception check.


MATT: Shit. You open the door and you look outside and there is snowfall. Not enough to wipe out the fresher series of footprints that are leading away from the door of the--

LAURA: They took it!

MARISHA: Son of a bitch!

SAM: They Mighty Nein'd us! (laughter)

MARISHA: They stole our idea.

LAURA: We should go. We could go. We just go after them, right now.

TRAVIS: I shoot three Eldritch Blasts into the bottom of the tower, because nobody will be able to hear me anyway. I'm like (whooshing). Just setting off explosions.

MATT: You hear (whooshing). These heavy impact sounds.

MARISHA: We rush downstairs.

MATT: Y'all rush down and see Fjord at the base of the tower looking really frustrated.

TRAVIS: Footprints!


SAM: What's happening? They're gone.

MARISHA: They can't have been gone long, right? We've been in the room for 15 minutes.

SAM: How long has it been?

ASHLEY: I'll go check in the room that they were in.

MATT: All right, so right, you go run in the room they were in? You rush in there and glance, it's empty.

MARISHA: Fucking bitches!

LAURA: Just take off after them. Take off after them.

MATT: After you guys ate and went to your respective rooms, it's probably been, I'd say from travel, sitting, resting and getting to a comfortable space, it's been about 30 or so minutes.

LAURA: Did they eat with us before we went to our rooms?

MATT: Hmm?

LAURA: Did they eat with us before we went to our rooms or did--

MATT: They did.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, so 30 minutes since we split off.

LIAM: Now, Jester, we could do our thing.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: We could fly.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Like we always do.

LAURA: God dangit. We used so many spells from the fucking dragon.

LIAM: People are exhausted and slots are down.

SAM: I kill Fjord. (laughter)

TALIESIN: That's the other thing, though, is they're not going to sleep. Which means if we sleep--

MARISHA: Oh, shit.

LAURA: Yeah, we can't sleep.

TRAVIS: The squat betrays you. (laughter)

MARISHA: Betrayed.

TALIESIN: I mean, if we sleep and then fly to catch up.


LIAM: They said we were three or four hours away.

LAURA: They're a few hours away. We could Polymorph ourselves and go after them right now.

LIAM: We could beat them there now.

SAM: Maybe. Do you guys have enough Polymorph to get us there?

LIAM: We could. They didn't cover three hours of territory in a half hour.

LAURA: We can get ahead of them if we Polymorph for an hour.

SAM: Unless they have some tricks that we don't know about?

LAURA: They would've done it.

TALIESIN: We also, now that we know they're gone, we can talk in here.

TRAVIS: Go, whatever the fastest thing is, do it, now.

LAURA: Polymorph.

LIAM: He's been, yeah.

LAURA: Should we get ahead of them, Or should we drop on them?

TRAVIS: On them.

MARISHA: And fuck them up and kill them?

TRAVIS: I just want the bag back.

MARISHA: Get the bag back?

SAM: Wait, wait.

LAURA: They've got all of our stuff.

LIAM: Yeah, keep it--

SAM: I know, but, I would say go ahead of them.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I was thinking that, too.

TALIESIN: Cut them off at the pass.

LAURA: But we don't know where they're going to go exactly.

ASHLEY: Is there a way we can follow them? No.

SAM: We know the general vicinity they're going. We could catch up to them and follow them. If we demand that bag now, it's a fight.

MARISHA: I have an idea.

SAM: It's a fight.

TRAVIS: It could be. It could be.

LIAM: It could be or we go along. We're not going to trail behind them without them knowing we're there.

MARISHA: We might be able to find out that hidden entrance that they're talking about.

LIAM: No to her, not to you.

ASHLEY: If we were to get there before they did?

TALIESIN: I don't have, I... Tomorrow I could have a spell for that, but I don't have it now.

LAURA: Nope.

MARISHA: We could ask the Somnovem.

SAM: Ask them what?

MARISHA: Where it is.

SAM: You two could? Because you talk to them now?

MARISHA: I could dream.

LAURA: Yeah, but you don't know when in a dream. It could be, like, four hours into sleep when you dream. They'd already be there.

MARISHA: We could move. You guys could carry me or something. I don't know, while we're moving. (laughter)

ASHLEY: I can carry her.

LAURA: I mean, if we can do that, then why the fuck couldn't we heal that other time?

TALIESIN: Yeah, you can't sleep.

LAURA: You can't sleep while we're traveling.

SAM: You can dream while we're carrying you.

TRAVIS: We should get moving and even see if we can see them. If not, we're flying towards the northwest corner of Aeor anyway, right?

SAM: Yep.

MARISHA: I mean, this could be--

LAURA: We should turn into giant owls or something, so that we have night vision.

MATT: You do have a bead on tracks. So, if somebody wants to take point on that, you could continue to track.

MARISHA: Who's got good survival?

TRAVIS: Not me.

SAM: I've got investigation, but I don't know if it's that or survival.

TALIESIN: Where are you at?

LAURA: Mine's plus five.

ASHLEY: Plus five, yeah.

TALIESIN: Five as well.

SAM: Survival to follow the tracks?

LIAM: In the wilderness.

MATT: Survival to keep up with the tracks, or if you're looking for them, and to continue. Perception, if you are aware of where they are, to maintain. So even just finding tracks is more survival. But once you know where they are, then you can use either survival or perception, I'd say.

LAURA: Oh, okay, so perception would be great.

TALIESIN: Both of us are great.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Problem is, you have no light, and it is nighttime.

TRAVIS: I didn't even roll a perception check.

MATT: So rolls would be at disadvantage, just so you know.

MARISHA: Unless we're like, eagles or some shit.

MATT: Right. Unless you're a creature with night vision.

LIAM: Or if you use a cantrip.

TALIESIN: Can I use your goggles?


SAM: Let us be seen.

MARISHA: For what?

TALIESIN: Tracking.

MARISHA: Are you tracking?

TALIESIN: I mean, I could, if I could see.

SAM: We should use light for as long as we can, and then ditch it when we feel like we're getting close?

TRAVIS: They'll see us coming.

LAURA: How do we know if we're getting close?

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Yeah, they'll see us coming, we should--

LAURA: We should just fuckin'-- We should be having this conversation while we're following.

MATT: I assume you guys are moving, since you said that. So you guys are out in the middle of the freezing snow, tower door closed behind you. (whistling) It's cold as fuck, and you're already feeling the wind cutting through your thicker outfits. But you can keep going.

SAM: Is it snowing?

MATT: It is snowing, yes.

SAM: Okay, I'm going to take a long, hard look at the prints, and try to remember how deep they are. So when we get closer and they're deeper, I'll--

MATT: It's not a heavy snow, thankfully. With expediency, you could catch up, but within probably an hour or so, those prints are going to be real hard to find.

SAM: Mm-hmm, okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Spin it up.

MARISHA: Half with owls, half riding?

SAM: Are we following tracks? We need to be on land.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Or are you guys polymorphing into horses, or something?

MARISHA: Right above the tracks.

LAURA: I was going to polymorph into owls and we can just fly above them, but it's up to you guys.

TRAVIS: No, no, owls are great. Fly above the ground, so we can see the tracks.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Still get a fly speed, just fly low to the ground.

LAURA: But if we can catch up to them without the owls, then we should save the spell slots.

LIAM: Also, all perception and everything goes to owl stats, not your hero stats.

LAURA: They'll see from us flying. They can use their eyes.

LIAM: Yeah.


MATT: They still would need darkvision to be able to not roll with disadvantage.

LAURA: Right.

LIAM: No. My perception will suck, but yours will be good.

MARISHA: But mine will be fine.

LIAM: But you need these guys.


TRAVIS: I have darkvision, too.

ASHLEY: I have darkvision.

SAM: Okay. Owl it up, then.

MARISHA: Your perception's higher than mine, right?


MARISHA: I toss them to Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Thank you, I love you.

TRAVIS: Thanks for healing me. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Make my eyes look big.

MARISHA: Caduceus is doing the perception checks.

MATT: All righty.

LIAM: Right.


LIAM: (whooshing) (hooting)

MATT: You're going owl.

LIAM: Owl.

TRAVIS: Otis, god.

MATT: Who else is going owl?

SAM: I should've fucking killed--

LAURA: I guess I'll turn myself and--

TRAVIS: I didn't even get a perception check.

MATT: Passive perception, which is 12 for you, so.

TRAVIS: You don't have to rub it in.

LAURA: I'll turn me and Yasha into owls as well.

MATT: All right, three night owls. Go for it. The rest of you jump on?


MATT: So it's three night owls and four of you. Who's riding on who?

SAM: I'm on Caleb.

MARISHA: I'll be on Yasha.

TALIESIN: I'll take Yasha as well.

SAM: What?

MATT: You already cast Fly. So who are you jumping on?

TRAVIS: Whoever. Jester?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Split up the clerics.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, no, I'm just fucking with you.

MATT: Okay. I would say probably travel with Veth on Caleb, just for a weight scenario, with the storm blowing in, because it is windy, so it's slowing you back a little bit. But you guys start looking. So for the first length of this, what's the speed, the fly speed?

LAURA: I don't have anybody on me, so Fjord could be on me.

MATT: Oh, sorry, I thought--

LAURA: Veth is on Caleb, Caduceus--

SAM: Caduceus and Beau are on--

MATT: Oh, both of you are on there.

LAURA: So Caduceus should be on Caleb.

MATT: For the purposes of, well... You don't weigh too much.

SAM: I'll go on Yasha with Beau. Caduceus, you can go on Caleb solo.

MATT: That'll work.

TALIESIN: That'll do.

MATT: Just from a weight distribution, the wind blowing, it'll slow you down otherwise.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: (hooting)

MATT: First length of this, go ahead and make a perception check. Anybody who is watching this. You have darkvision?


MATT: Go ahead and roll perception check. Roll a perception check.

TRAVIS: Natural 19, so, 22.

MATT: You can make one with disadvantage if you want to.




MATT: Nice.

MARISHA: That's a natural one with that disadvantage.

ASHLEY: Do I, mm.

SAM: No, you're--

MATT: If you want to as eagles, you can. I'm generally, for this, I'm taking two people doing the check as the guiding part, rather than doing all rolls over and over again.

LAURA: Yeah, that makes sense.

MATT: So with that, Caduceus, you have a very solid bead on the tracks. They're starting to fade from the snowfall, but you know the direction they're going and keeping tabs on it. You guys continue following Caduceus' guidance. I take it, the eagle, or the owls are you trying to be stealthy in approach?

LIAM: Yes.

LAURA: They're stealthy creatures.

MATT: Indeed, so I would like to stealth checks from the three eagles, if you don't mind.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: This one?

MATT: All three of the owls. Brain.

MARISHA: What if we just grab Otis with some claws, and just keep going?

TRAVIS: If he hasn't handed it off.

LAURA: What do we add to that, dexterity?

TALIESIN: He's got one of attached to him anyway, doesn't he?

LAURA: F-F-four.

MATT: Four, okay.

TALIESIN: That wouldn't matter, he's got one on his back.

LIAM: 13.

MATT: 13.


TALIESIN: He's carrying one anyway.

MARISHA: A backpack?

TALIESIN: One of the big things.

LIAM: Plus four, stealth.

MARISHA: Oh, yeah.

LIAM: Giant owl.

MARISHA: That's true, just get--

LAURA: Plus four?

ASHLEY: Plus four on top of--

LIAM: Plus four to whatever you roll for giant owl. It's not Yasha's stats, it's giant owl stats.

ASHLEY: Got it, so 10.

LIAM: And they have two skills, perception and stealth.

MATT: They have a 60-foot speed in the air, so you guys will be able to keep up in twice the time, or in half the time. So for the first length of this, which is catching up to where they were when you guys started this journey, go ahead and roll another perception check for the two of you, and you with disadvantage, Beauregard, to see if you can maintain for the second leg.

MARISHA: Oh wow.

TALIESIN: Natural 20.

MATT: For a total of?




TALIESIN: Using my Guidance.

MATT: Caduceus, you are the eyes of this, through and through. You, about another 20 or so minutes into this, begin to see them at a distance through the dark.

TALIESIN: They're coming, right over there. We've got them.

MATT: I'd like the owls to make one more stealth check on approach here.

MARISHA: Are we grabbing and going?

SAM: Do we have Locate Object?

MARISHA: Caduceus has a point. If Otis has one on his backpack, we don't necessarily need the one that we got. We just need a threshold--

SAM: Does Otis have one on his backpack?

TALIESIN: Otis has got one on his back.

LAURA: Not Otis.

SAM: No, the big guy.

TALIESIN: The big guy.

LAURA: Zoran?

MATT: Zoran has the big one on his back, yes.

TRAVIS: Carrying a goliath away is different than carrying a halfling away. We could try and make a swipe for Otis and then negotiate, But if he doesn't have it, we don't have any leverage.


MATT: So who's doing what? Locate what?

MARISHA: It just depends on who has what. He was asking if there was a Locate Object spell anybody had.

LAURA: I don't have it.

TALIESIN: Nope. Tomorrow.

MATT: You'd have to make a good guess, then.

LAURA: As we go, I'm going to try to swoop in and just grab the backpack off of--

SAM: If you-- Do we see it?

MATT: See what?

LAURA: We can see Zoran walking.

MATT: You can see Zoran walking with the pack.

SAM: Oh, got it.

MATT: The heavy wrapping he has, this leather wrapping around the stone.

MARISHA: We got three eagles, we can make one go for Otis, one go for the pack, and one go for the lightest person and the other lightest person.

LIAM: We see individual, each of them in the group?

MATT: You do, yes.

LIAM: Okay, I'm going to go for Otis.

LAURA: I rolled a 19 on stealth.

MATT: 19 on stealth, okay.

LIAM: 13, again.

MATT: 13.


MATT: 10, okay.

SAM: Oh boy.

MARISHA: What do I have?

LAURA: They're going to cancel us.

SAM: Maybe we should just talk.

TRAVIS: Give him a chance to settle up.

MARISHA: Well, let's grab him first, so we have negotiating leverage.

TRAVIS: And fly straight up.

LAURA: He'll just cancel our Polymorph.

MATT: Go ahead and just put some perspective here on where they are situated.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's good.

SAM: My butt's getting sweaty.

TRAVIS: Zoran on the right. Who's second from the right?

MATT: So they have Zoran, Lucien, Cree, Otis, and Tyffial right there. So, you all are swooping up.

SAM: That's a hard grab. That's a hard grab.

MARISHA: Of who? Which one?

SAM: All of them.

LAURA: All of them. it's a hard grab.

SAM: Lucien can swipe out. They've got Cree there, They can pounce on us.


MATT: So we have Fjord on Caduceus. Caduceus and Veth, you said you're on Caleb?

LIAM: I mean, giant owls do have 19 hit points.

SAM: I flopped, so I'm with Beau on Yasha.

MATT: Gotcha.

TALIESIN: How many of them are there?

LAURA: We should've turned ourselves into dragons.


LIAM: Going to hit them out of the air like a piñata, just (explosion).

SAM: As we get closer, I'm going to cast Mage Hand.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Just to have it up.

LAURA: Wait, I thought. This is just going to go so great!

MARISHA: Can I ready-- Who am I on? I'm on Yasha?

LAURA: You're on Yasha. Yeah, you are.

MARISHA: Who are you grabbing?

TRAVIS: I am also going to cast See Invisibility for an hour just 'cause who fucking knows?

MATT: Okay, you got it.

MARISHA: I'm going to just pull out my staff and ready it, so I can do some--

LAURA: Cool monk shit?

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter) Yeah. Beat some heads from the air.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm readying a spell.


MATT: What are you readying?

TALIESIN: Command.

LIAM: Oh, we should've been ostriches.

MARISHA: You should have been ostriches. (laughter) I can have my joust moment.

TRAVIS: Velociraptors. (laughter)

MATT: Perfect. Okay, you're holding Command?

LIAM: Yasha's got a lance.

MATT: For what?

MARISHA: Yeah. Fuck!

TALIESIN: I'm going to go for Sleep.

MATT: You're going for... Oh, to.

TALIESIN: Can you do that, or no?

MATT: Sleep is its own spell.

TALIESIN: Oh, never mind then.

MARISHA: It's its own thing.

LAURA: Halt, Prone.

TALIESIN: Freeze, I'm going to go for Freeze.

MATT: Okay, all right. Who's your target?

TALIESIN: All of them.

MATT: Oh yeah, high enough level.


MATT: Okay. All right, so you're doing that. You got your staff ready. You are casting See Invisibility right now.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

LAURA: Otis is carrying it.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Yasha, are you doing anything?

ASHLEY: I am an owl, so I won't take anything out.

MATT: Oh, fair enough. That's right.

ASHLEY: (laughs) I forgot. I was like, "I'm going to ready." I'm not going to do anything.

MATT: Veth has Mage Hand.

MARISHA: Any type of swoops you want to do, and I can (clicks).

ASHLEY: Great.



MATT: All right. Veth, there is your Mage Hand.

SAM: And from past experience, that backpack, the bag of holding, how heavy is it? Is it something a Mage Hand--

MATT: The bag of holding is maybe like--

SAM: Or, would the backpack that Otis has.

MATT: You're referring to the big thing that Zoran has?

LAURA: I'm going for the Zoran bag.

SAM: No, the thing that Fjord lost.

MATT: Oh, that is like a small satchel. It weighs--

SAM: Oh, it wasn't our bag of holding, right?

MATT: It was the bag of holding.

SAM: It was, okay.

MATT: Bag of holding, it's a little--

SAM: How heavy is it? Or could a Mage Hand pick it up?

MATT: That, a Mage Hand could probably pick up, yeah.

SAM: Okay. Just good to know.


MATT: Okay. So you guys (whooshing) begin to swoop in.

LAURA: (whooshing) All this planning.

MATT: Are you guys all coming in at this direction at once, like in a giant squadron swoop line?

LAURA: No. I'm going to veer off to the side and try to swoop in, but I'm on the other side because I'm going after Zoran, so I'm going to try to fly out wide and then swoop in.

LIAM: If you stagger it though, the first will tip off before the other two hit.

MARISHA: Got to be all at once, but I'm down for a three-pronged approach.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Yeah, if--

SAM: I'm going to hold a Mage Hand grab if we miss on the swoop.

MATT: Okay. So you're going for Zoran this way. You are going for--

SAM: Yasha, are you down to--

ASHLEY: Oh, yeah.

SAM: Who's going for Otis? You are?

LIAM: I'm going to grab Otis, his whole person.

TRAVIS: And you're dead middle, right?

SAM: And you're going for Zoran. So we're just following up in the rear? Are we the second wave?

LIAM: Don't be a second wave. If there's a first wave, then they'll go, "What?" and see the second wave.

SAM: Sure, but we can't both go for Otis at the same time. We'll not make--

TRAVIS: There could be a second one, though, if they succeed on dexterity, right? First could miss, second could be successful.

LAURA: Yeah, that's true.

SAM: Let's go for Otis.

LAURA: Go in second.

SAM: We'll go for Otis second.

MARISHA: Okay, yeah.

MATT: Okay, so two for Otis. Okay. You all begin to dive in and as they're walking, Lucien stops.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: Turns around--

TALIESIN: Are we within 30 feet?

MATT: You would be now within 30 feet, yes.


MATT: All right.

MARISHA: Come on.

TALIESIN: All four of them.

ASHLEY: Come on, come on, come on, come on.

SAM: You can do that?

ASHLEY: Five, sorry.

TALIESIN: Oh, there's five of them?

TALIESIN: No, four.

LAURA: Yeah, there's five.

LIAM: Yeah, one's teeny.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: What's the-- is it a wisdom save?

TALIESIN: Wisdom save 18.

MATT: Tyffial is frozen, or at least stops in place. I'm going to mark these here with these.

TALIESIN: Freeze implies don't move.

MATT: Yeah, they just hold in place. Just--

SAM: They suddenly get cold.

MATT: Yeah. Now they do. (laughter) Tyffial, (grunts) stops in place there. Otis.

SAM: Oh boy. Oh boy.

MATT: Fails.

MARISHA: Yes. Yes! Otis Fails!

SAM: Otis fails? Otis sucks.

MARISHA: If they get him--

LIAM: Lesser halfling.

MARISHA: I say--

MATT: Lucien succeeds.

MARISHA: We go mailbox batting.

MATT: Cree succeeds.

ASHLEY: Hell yeah.

TRAVIS: Cree succeeds.

ASHLEY: You get in the feathers and I'll go.

MARISHA: Okay, okay.

MATT: Zoran succeeds.

TALIESIN: Got two of them.


LIAM: Yeah. One of the targets.

TRAVIS: Let's hope it is where we think it is.

MATT: And as you're all swooping in at this point, you see that two of them freeze, Lucien looks behind and he goes (tsking). There is a (whooshes), a wave. You suddenly, your vision goes dark. Your darkvision vanishes around you. You are riding which eagle? The center one?

SAM: Caleb.

MATT: Caleb.

TALIESIN: I'm holding on for dear life, anyway.

MATT: Caleb, you are (whooshes). Now Caleb.

LIAM: Mm-hmm.

MATT: And also the spell-- Well no, you had the twinned spell, so you're fine. So, both of you, suddenly, traveling at full speed, you're riding on Caleb in the middle of the air going 60 feet per round, both (whooshes).

MARISHA: Okay, let's go for Otis.

MATT: And tumble into the snow. (laughter) Right there. All right. While that's happening, what are you doing, Fjord, on the side here with--

LAURA: I was going in to grab Zoran's bag.

MATT: All right. I need you to go ahead and make either-- This would be an athletics check with the strength of the eagle.

LAURA: Strength check, then?

SAM: ♪ Let the eagle soar ♪

LAURA: ♪ N-N-N-Nineteen ♪

MATT: 19. He fails. He has a high strength roll, but he rolled really low. So you swoop down, (whooshes), and (whistles) swing up, currently grabbing (grunts). And you see him release it, he doesn't have the ability to hold it back, and you're now clutching with your eagle, or the owl claws from both sides--

LAURA: What do I do with it?

MATT: The large, blue, faintly glowing threshold crest stone. Swooping off this way.

MARISHA: Go, go, go, get as far, go away, go. Get going.

LAURA: I'm just going.

MATT: All right, so that was your action, so you can't double move, but that's as far as you can get by swooping in and grabbing it and picking up. That's your round.

MARISHA: Oh shit.

MATT: The rest of you, what are you doing?

ASHLEY: We're swooping down to Otis.

MATT: To Otis?

ASHLEY: Just going to--

MATT: All right, you have your Mage Hand. What were we going to do?

SAM: Well, you were just going to grab Otis' body, correct? Or?

MARISHA: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: There are two of your friends in the snow, I should point out.

SAM: Yeah, I know, but I don't know, do we have enough time to change directions and change our intent?

MATT: If whoever's driving can, yeah.

SAM: I mean, this is a dumb eagle over here. I don't know if-- (laughs)

MATT: Well, no, if you... I mean, what are you going to do? What are you going to do?

SAM: You're with me, Beau.

TRAVIS: We can negotiate.

SAM: We're going to continue and grab Otis.

MARISHA: Grab Otis?

SAM: Grab Otis.

SAM: That's the plan. Stick to the plan.

MARISHA: Who's down? Caleb and Caduceus?

LIAM: In a heap in the snow.

SAM: Caleb's got tricks.

MATT: So you guys dart--

SAM: Right?

MARISHA: Do you have tricks, Caleb, or do you need me?

MATT: -- (whooshes) down towards Otis. Yasha, I need you to go ahead and make a strength check using the strength of the owl.

ASHLEY: Okay, what's the strength of the owl?

MATT: What's the modifier for that?

LAURA: It's just a plus one for the owls.

MATT: Plus one. So go ahead and roll a d20 and add a plus one.

ASHLEY: Come on. Oh no.

TRAVIS: What is it?

ASHLEY: It's a two. So a total of three.

MATT: You swoop down, as your claws reach out, Otis just (whooshes) vanishes into the snow.

LAURA: But Otis is frozen.

MARISHA: Yeah, he had Freeze on him.

MATT: Oh, that's true, actually.

TRAVIS: (gasps)

MARISHA: Can he make a--?

MATT: Well, "Freeze" was just a stop in place.

TALIESIN: Six seconds.

MATT: Correct. The equivalent of--

LIAM: That's one round of combat, which we haven't finished yet.

MATT: Yeah, the Halt.

ASHLEY: So do I get advantage, or something?

MATT: Yeah, so it's the equivalent of a Halt. So yeah. So he just stays there, even with that low roll, because of the command, you pick him up. (sighing)

ASHLEY: Thank god.

SAM: And then as soon as we grab him. I'm going to have that Mage Hand try to pull the bag off of him.

MATT: Okay. I'll put that there, that's fine. It's having a hard time staying on. So the Mage Hand goes to pull the bag. Bag's not on him.

SAM: Damn it! And the Mage Hand will just give him a wet willy.

LAURA: Of course Lucien has the bag.

MATT: (as Otis) (groaning)

MATT: All right. So that's your go.

SAM: (nervous laugh)

TALIESIN: I think they're frozen till after my turn.

MATT: Correct, but we're just keeping that in mind.

TRAVIS: -- that he doesn't have the bag.

SAM: We don't have the bag!

MARISHA: Upon hearing that, I jump off of the eagle. I'm going to do a back flip, three-point landing off of the eagle, right in between... Right in between Cree and Zor, Zor, Zor man.

LAURA: Zoran?

SAM: Zorgon!

LAURA: Xhorhaus man.

TRAVIS: Zoran.

SAM: I am Zorgon of Blackgerd.

MATT: So you're going to land right here, in front Zoran?

MARISHA: In between Zoran and Cree, if I could.

MATT: Roll an acrobatics check to try and kick off and make the landing.

MARISHA: Natural 20. (cheering)

MATT: Right there between the two of them.

LIAM: Monk shit.


ASHLEY: Monk shit.

MARISHA: Can I do anything else?

MATT: Yeah, it's your land. What are you going to do?

MARISHA: I'm going to turn around and crack Cree in the face.


MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Ratchet it up a bit, Beauregard in character.

MATT: Now, before you roll your attack, before you roll your attack.

MARISHA: Uh-huh?

ASHLEY: Dang it, I pulled the ribbon off. (laughter) I was so stressed, I'm like, twirling.

MATT: Lucien's going to use Blood Curse of the Eyeless on you.

TRAVIS: Blood Curse of the--

TALIESIN: Two of those in one round?

SAM: Legendary.

MATT: One of them was an action, or him turning and doing a thing, not frozen in place.

TALIESIN: Yeah, man.

MATT: You guys weren't stealthy. They saw you coming and you swooped in. So he takes a little bit of damage on that, but all of your attacks are at disadvantage.


TRAVIS: Remember, we can talk. We can talk.

SAM: Yeah, well, we could.

TRAVIS: We have a big bag of something now.

MARISHA: We can, whenever anyone who talks starts talking. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Until then.

MARISHA: Until then, I'ma pop pop. Pop. Oh my god. One of those is another natural 20, but I rolled at disadvantage, which is still a natural 15, for, and this is my quarterstaff, so 27.

MATT: 27, okay. That hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: That's good. 14 damage. Stunning Strike.

MATT: 14 damage, Stunning Strike. That is going to be a 12. So Cree fails.

MARISHA: Fails. She is stunned. I'm going to turn around now with my second attack and crack Zordsbjor.

SAM: I am Zordge.

MATT: Disadvantage.

MARISHA: Also a 27, I rolled a 17 and a 15.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Can Beau see anything? We're in pitch dark, right?

MATT: Yes, you're in pitch dark.

MARISHA: I'm rolling at disadvantage.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah. That is 13 damage.

LIAM: Because I was thinking about what the hell I want to do.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike.

MATT: That is a 21.

MARISHA: He saves.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Do I have-- Who is that right directly in front of me? Is that Lucien?

MATT: Yeah, there's Zoran, Cree, Lucien. You're five feet away from him, or like, sorry, 10 feet away, so you'd have to move in if you wanted to.

MARISHA: Do I still have move?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Do it!

MARISHA: I'll move in.

MATT: Okay. All righty.

MARISHA: Flurry of Blows. See if I can stun him. That's not great. That is a 20-- hang on, 14 plus 12. Oh, that's still 26. Disadvantage.

MATT: Then that hits.



MARISHA: Oh, come on.

LAURA: "That's not great. 26? Does that hit?"

MARISHA: Da da da da da da, okay--

LAURA: You're an ancient dragon.

MARISHA: 13 damage on the first.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike. He's probably got crazy constitution.

MATT: Okay. No effect.

MARISHA: Second one. 27, another 15.

MATT: Damn! You guys are rolling real good this session.

TRAVIS: It's wild.

MATT: That needs to stop.

MARISHA: 11 points of damage.

MATT: 11 points of damage, all righty.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike.

MATT: Stunning Strike. No effect. You do Extract Aspects.


MATT: He has resistance to fire and necrotic damage.


MATT: Immunity to psychic damage.

MARISHA: Okay, hang on, that's resistance. Okay, fire and necrotic, and then immunity to psychic?

MATT: Mm-hmm. And is immune to being charmed, frightened, or stunned.


MARISHA: Frightened or stunned.

TRAVIS: That's good to know.

MARISHA: Matt built this baddie--

SAM: ♪ He built this baddie ♪

MARISHA: -- with a monk.

LIAM: ♪ For Beauregard ♪

SAM: ♪ (harmonizing) ♪

MARISHA: Okay. So I, yeah, pop the two of them, come through, do a nice big like cross and a haymaker, I'm assuming he shrugs it off.

MATT: Yep. Just like, (impacts)

MARISHA: And then I just say: Were your beds not comfy enough?

LAURA: (chuckles)

MATT: He just gives you a tightened glare. All right. At this instance, we have to roll initiative. We've had the pseudo, not really a surprise round, reactionary round.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: We do need initiative on this.

SAM: ♪ (singing notes) ♪

MARISHA: Ooh! That's bad, I'm going to use my boots.

LIAM: Rolled a one.

SAM: I did, too.

LIAM: See ya later.

MARISHA: I also rolled a one.

SAM: I did, too. Guys, we got three ones.

LIAM: In fact, I'm going to the restroom.

SAM: Uh-huh. ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: Okay. So 25 to 20.



TALIESIN: I got nothing, so.

MATT: 20 to 15.

LAURA: 17.


MATT: All right. What's your dexterity modifier, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: My dex? Two.

MATT: Got it, all right, cool. So what was it again?

LAURA: 17.

MATT: 17, Jester. All righty.

TRAVIS: And Fjord with 16.

MATT: All right. 15 to 10?


MATT: 10 to five.


ASHLEY: Eight.

SAM: Six.

MATT: On nine was Yasha?

ASHLEY: I'm sorry, I'm 10.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: So Yasha, Beau.

MARISHA: Yasha, Beau.



ASHLEY: I don't know why I just said eight, though.

MATT: Beau, what were you? You were eight?


MATT: So you were nine. And then what were you, Veth?

SAM: Six, and then Caleb's at the end with, like, four or something like that.

MARISHA: He rolled a one.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. So Caleb is at the end, got you.

LAURA: Fuck.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: (Southern accent) I hope someone can talk real purty.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Lucien's up first.

MARISHA: After you punched three of them!

TRAVIS: Lucien's up first.

ASHLEY: ♪ (imitates background music) ♪

LAURA: Fix this!

MATT: Lucien, with that glare. I think a 30 hits you. Make a constitution saving throw for me.

TRAVIS: 30. Shit.

MARISHA: This is probably going to be really bad. Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

MATT: Mm-hmm?

MARISHA: 10 total.

MATT: As you all swoop around and gather, those who are nearby and can see, you watch as Lucien, after grinning with a glare, reaches out and grabs Beauregard by the throat and lifts her an inch or two off the ground.

SAM: Oh boy.

MARISHA: You watch as blood begins to pour from her eyes, her mouth, her ears, her nose. Your brain is filled with a searing pain you have never experienced in your life.

SAM: Oh boy. That's not good. That's like an insta-death thing or something.

TRAVIS: It's not great.

ASHLEY: Better not be. I'll kill him.

SAM: Oh man. That'd be weirdly poetic.

LIAM: Kill your friend for your friend.

TRAVIS: Lot of adding. Still more.

MATT: You take 69 points of psychic damage.

SAM: Nice.


ASHLEY: What is it again?

TRAVIS: 69 points of psychic damage.

ASHLEY: Six-nine.

MATT: And he, just holding you there, goes, "Is this really how you want this to go?" And just holds her up there. Your vision is just white, searing pain right now at the moment. The other hand, he pulls the sword out and runs the back of it across his stomach where the cloak is now open, the heavy fur exposing his midsection and the loose, low-cut shirt, and as it runs the blood, you can see the blade begin to shimmer with that same weird, glowing, iridescent coloration. (swooshing) That's going to end his turn as he begins to step back a bit, pulling you with him this direction, walking. That brings us to Cree's turn. Cree is stunned, can't do anything, and just stands there like (groans). Holding her middle of her chest where she took the impacts from you and is just trying to shake it off. Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Does this last more than a round?

MATT: What, the--

TALIESIN: Blindness. Am I still blind or am I not blind?

MATT: Sorry, you are still blind.


MATT: I say blind. You're in pitch darkness. You see the faint glow of the--

LIAM: Doesn't Caduceus have the goggles on?

MATT: He does.

TRAVIS: Did he dispel the goggles? Is that what it was?

MATT: The goggles aren't working.

LIAM: Ah, okay.

TALIESIN: So it's not that I'm... It's just that the goggles aren't working anymore?

MATT: Correct, it's just dark night. So you can still see faint shapes around you now that you're on the ground and getting up or as you're looking on the ground, but you are looking normal vision in pitch black and just the faint blue glow of the threshold crest being carried off by one of the owls.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm going to stand up then, light the staff so there's something to see.

MATT: The staff does not light.

SAM: The staff does not light.

MATT: The staff does not light.

TALIESIN: So it's just nothing right now? Oh, that's okay.

MARISHA: Well, he popped that spell on you, didn't he?

TALIESIN: Yeah, so I guess I'm out at the moment. I'm going to stand up then.

LIAM: Did he target him?



LIAM: Beyond hitting us?

TALIESIN: I was hoping that you'd notice that we were trying to just bring back a sense of balance. That's a respectable move considering, a violation of even tenuous trust.

MATT: "Trust only goes so far. We got what we wanted." That finishes your go, Caduceus. It is now Otis' turn, who is trying to kick off of you.

SAM: Make a fucking move. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

MATT: All right. Otis is going to go ahead and use a bonus action to, once again, push his thumb into the crossbow that he pulls from the side. It's this big heavy crossbow. It fills with this crackling, purple-ish, electricity-like energy arcing across the front of the crossbow, and is going to try and kick off of you. Off of you, so make an athletics.

SAM: With owl stats?

MATT: To hold on with owl stats.

SAM: We might need some owl stats there.

LAURA: Oh, yeah, no no, what?

MATT: Well, it's plus one to strength, so just roll and add a plus one.


LIAM: Yep.


MATT: Kicks off, falls back, and lands in the snow.

MARISHA: Piece of shit.

MATT: And is going to start darting in this way, to cluster in, crossbow at the ready, now back towards Lucien. All right, that finishes Otis' go.

TRAVIS: Question, did we take a short rest? An official short rest?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: We did at one point, yes.

LAURA: We took a short rest after the dragon fight.

MATT: Correct. Not in the tower, but after the dragon fight.

MARISHA: Well, imagine in the tower, there's eating and all that stuff, too.

MATT: Yeah, like, you got a short rest. It is now Jester. Fjord, you're on deck.

LAURA: I mean, I was just flying.

MATT: Yeah. Which direction you going?

LAURA: Going to keep flying out this way.

MATT: All right, you've got Fjord in tow.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: What's your max distance you can go?

MATT: 60 feet, right?

LAURA: 60 feet.

MATT: If you double move, you can go even further. 120, or, depends on if you're trying to just make distance, or--

LAURA: I'm just trying to get it at a distance right now, but I'm not going to, like, abandon our friends.

TRAVIS: No, distance is good, because if they close, then we're in range.

MARISHA: Yeah, then we're fucked.

TRAVIS: We can talk.

MATT: So what you doing? You going 60 feet? Or you're double moving to a full 120? Your call.

LAURA: Why you nodding? There's two options there.

TRAVIS: I would say 120.

LAURA: Really?

TRAVIS: Yeah. Calmer heads can prevail. You're real close, that's a different story.

SAM: Beau's going to die.

TRAVIS: We have what they need.

SAM: Oh, you do, you guys do. Yeah.

MARISHA: We can still try and get out of here if we feel like we want to run.

SAM: You can't.

ASHLEY: Well, I can try to--

LAURA: 120 feet, I guess.

TALIESIN: I don't know what's wrong with me. If I can't cast, I don't know what to do.

MARISHA: Maybe it'll fade.

LAURA: You fully can't cast anything?

TALIESIN: Nope, I tried to cast a cantrip, nothing.

LAURA: Like your staff doesn't work?

TALIESIN: Nope. No heal, no nothing.

SAM: Who's turn?

MATT: That finishes your go. Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: I will call out--

MATT: Are you going full double distance, you said? Or you--

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay. Even further out. 60 or so feet this way.

TRAVIS: I will call out: Now who's taking things from whom? I assume if you need the rest of this, we should all settle down, and discuss what our options are as we near the end of our journey, wouldn't you agree?

MATT: As a retort on your turn, you hear Lucien shout through the wind and the snow, "Take it if you like; there's more where that came from. We'll just kill your friends and take a little more time than we anticipated."

TRAVIS: Do I believe him?

MATT: At this distance, make an insight check with disadvantage because you're just going off of a voice through the wind. You have no facial expressions, no physicality--

TALIESIN: Can I take an insight check on that as well, since I'm right there?

MATT: I'll let you.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

TRAVIS: It's only a 10. My insight sucks.

MATT: Yeah. Too far. Too difficult.

TRAVIS: I do love a good bluff.

MATT: I would say disadvantage on you, too, for the same reason because it is in pitch black for you beyond the just faint bit of light that's making it's way.

TALIESIN: Damn it! 19.

MATT: 19's still pretty good. You don't feel like he's bluffing.


ASHLEY: (sighs)

TALIESIN: I'm going to definitely put up my hands and just sort of try and be nice and chill.

MATT: Okay. That finishes Fjord's go.


MATT: Yes.

LIAM: Where did that come from? Did that come from him not being able to cast magic? Did that come from when we got zapped out of the air? Or did I miss when I ran to the bathroom an additional thing done to Caduceus?

MARISHA: I think when you went to the bathroom, we got hit with a thing.

MATT: You guys were in the air, your spell vanished, you landed.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: Caduceus got up and tried to cast magic, didn't work.

LIAM: So it was from getting hit out of the air?

MATT: It seems so.

LIAM: Seems so.

MATT: Something like that. You don't know.

TALIESIN: The goggles stopped working.

MATT: So it is now Zoran's turn.


LAURA: You can just take magic from somebody?

MARISHA: (sighs)

MATT: Zoran's going to walk over. Run his hand across the outside of the mace, like it's a matchstick, but it's just tiny little splinter blades. (swooshes) Once again, his blood scatters across the snow and across the hammer head and as it does flame ignites.

LAURA: So we can see everything now?

MATT: Now you can see, there's flame, a little bit of glowing firelight in the area as he swings the maul, (swooshes) right into Beau's stomach.


MATT: That is going to be 18 to hit.


MATT: For the first swing, you actually pull up your legs almost putting them on Lucien's arm and the swing goes wide. As you kick back down, he angrily follows through with an upswing. Natural 20.

SAM: (sighs)

TALIESIN: I can't cancel, can I?

MATT: You can try.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and cancel it.

MATT: No effect.

TALIESIN: Really? It's a racial trait. You can't even--

LAURA: Fuck.

LIAM: Where you at, Beau?

MARISHA: I'm bad.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: He just took all your magic away? How can he do that?

TALIESIN: I don't know.

ASHLEY: How did he do that?

SAM: Maybe it's just for a round?

MARISHA: I'm hoping it's just for a round.

TALIESIN: I'm definitely going to be enough. I'm going to be calling enough.

LIAM: They don't want surrender. They want victory.

LAURA: Well, yeah, they don't care. They're going to kill us.

MATT: Take 18 points of bludgeoning damage, Beauregard, and five points of fire damage from the impact of the maul.

MARISHA: It's 22 total?

MATT: Correct. That finishes Zoran's turn. Yasha, you're up.

LAURA: You have the power to dispel--


LAURA: Yeah, I don't have to do that, you can do it if you want.

SAM: You have the power to dodeca-heal yourself. If you believe.

ASHLEY: Okay. I'm going to dispel the eagle.

SAM: Oh. We're not going to go--

ASHLEY: Are you still on me?

SAM: Yeah, but I can land. I thought we were going to go back and try to get Beau.

LAURA: Yeah. Oh, that, too. Yeah. Yeah.

ASHLEY: Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay. The stats of the owl are so low.

SAM: Well then, ditch it. Whatever you want.

ASHLEY: (sighs) Fuck, I didn't realize I was next. Okay. Okay.

LIAM: People are going to take a swipe at her, when you leave, if you grab her and go.

TRAVIS: Do you guys even see the pouch on Lucien?

MATT: Well, forced movement is different from chosen movement. If you force something out of a range, it doesn't necessarily trigger an opportunity attack. It's when something actively moves out.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: If the bag's not on Otis, and it's not in this big-ass bag that we have--

SAM: It's definitely on Lucien.

TRAVIS: We should be able to see it.

MARISHA: Lucien or Cree, which is why, because Cree is feels like their bag bitch a lot of times.

LIAM: (sighs)


MATT: What are you doing, Yasha?

ASHLEY: I'm going to--

TRAVIS: I need it for something.

ASHLEY: I'm going to try to swoop down and grab Beau, out of that area.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Is there anything I can on my end to try and grab and will this to happen?

SAM: Make your shoulders more--

MATT: I will say because--

MARISHA: Yeah, make little loops on my arms.

MATT: -- because you cannot see in the darkness, you do not see the owl in the air, and you've taken so much unexpected damage in the past round that you are semi-dazed, so I will say, unfortunately, you cannot aid in this, but anything is possible. So as you turn as you can on a dime. (swooshes) As the owl then goes into a swoop, (swoops) striking down, I need you to go ahead and make a strength check. So roll a d20 and add one.


SAM: (groans)

MATT: Lucien rolled low. He's not super strong, if you recall Molly's physical statistics.

TALIESIN: I do remember.

MATT: (swooshes) You snatch Beauregard out of Lucien's hand and as you (swooshes) pull her away, this direction, for the rest of your 60 feet to about there.


LAURA: Now we just got to get Caleb and Caduceus out of there.

ASHLEY: There's nothing else I can do as the owl right? I can't do my--

MATT: Your action was to pull her out.


LAURA: That's a great action.

MARISHA: Thank you. Thank you.

MATT: Okay. That brings us to Beauregard. You are now being held, semi rag-doll--

MARISHA: Oh shit.

MATT: As you recover.

MARISHA: It's me. Oh god.

TRAVIS: Do you have a potion?

MARISHA: Yes, I do. I will drown this that's sitting right here. It's this plus a thing, right? Plus four?

MATT: Yes. 4d4 plus four.

MATT: You roll the dice and then add the number of dice that are in the potion.

MARISHA: Oh, is that how it is?

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: How cool. Oh, what a nice little trick.

TRAVIS: How long have we had those potion bottles?

MATT: Yeah, 2d2 plus two, 4d4 plus four. 8d8 plus eight.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay. That gives me something. It's not a lot, but it's something.

MATT: Okay. That your turn, Beauregard?

MARISHA: Can I do anything else?

MATT: I mean, if you have anything else to do, while you're being held by an owl.

MARISHA: That was my action.

LAURA: Could you Patient Defense in the owl's grasp?

MARISHA: I guess I could. Could I do that?

MATT: If you use a ki point to bonus action it because used your action--

MARISHA: Okay, yeah. I will do that.

MATT: Or vice-versa.

MARISHA: I can do that?

MATT: Yeah, you can do that, since we drink potions as bonus actions.

MARISHA: I'll be on my guard as I hang limply in the arms of an owl. ♪ In the arms of the angel ♪

TRAVIS: Go for the bag or something?

ASHLEY: (exhales) What are you at?

MARISHA: Clutch.

SAM: ♪ Fly away ♪

MARISHA: 27 hit points.

ASHLEY: Yoikes.

MARISHA: Yeah, I was down to 13.

MATT: All right. Tyffial, she now watches Beauregard get pulled off, looks back, and now sees Caduceus and Caleb on the ground. Caleb still face down in the snow, just starting to get up off the ground. Caduceus hands up. Tyffial goes and pulls out the longsword. Runs it along her tongue and as it does you can see the red mark across it.

LIAM: Oh boy.

MATT: And that same black, tendril energy swirls up it. Is going to go ahead and step forward.

LIAM: Oh boy.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: And stepping towards you, Caleb, you watch as the effect on the sword, vanishes.

LIAM: The what of the sword?

MATT: The effect on the sword.

LAURA: It's like a bubble around him.

MATT: "Shit."

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: And is still going to go ahead and strike towards you. 11.

LIAM: Does not hit.

MATT: Shitty roll. But can make three attacks so, yeah. The first one, (swooshes) you roll out of the way, and it (impact) into the ground. The second one is 22.

LIAM: And I saw just now, that the his sword (blows raspberry) when he got close to me.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: So I'm not even going to burn a Shield, it hits.

MATT: Okay. So you take nine points of slashing damage. And the third strike is a 15-- 16.

LIAM: Hits, yeah.

MATT: Hits, all right. That is going to be 12 points of slashing damage.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Lucien is immune to charm. Does that mean that they all are? Because they're all a hive mind?

LIAM: Hard to know.

LAURA: Probably. Who knows?

MATT: That ends that go. Caleb, it's your turn.

LIAM: Oh jeez. I'll get up. Ho, boy.


LIAM: I will move back 15 feet, the half of my movement that is left.

MATT: Okay, Tyffial does get an opportunity attack on you. Swinging once more double-handed on the longsword towards you for-- That's going to be a 25 to hit.


MATT: You take another 13 points of slashing damage as you back out of the range.

LIAM: Okay, and for my action, I'm going to attempt to polymorph myself into a giant owl, no idea if I'm out of range of whatever this thing is.

MATT: You finish casting the spell. You begin to cast the spell, I should say.

SAM: What is that? What is going on right there?

LIAM: He's checking range for Lucien's skullduggery. His shenanigans.

MATT: The spell has no effect.

LIAM: Not far enough back. Okay.

SAM: So there's a bubble around Lucien?

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Well, you maintain polymorph by swooping in, and swooping over, but anything that this way.

LIAM: He hit an area.

LAURA: Yeah, he did an area.

LIAM: An area. Non-magic field.

SAM: Somewhere around there.

TRAVIS: Where we were coming from because the sword lit up and then it went away as it went closer to Caleb.

LAURA: Yeah, so it's around you. It might be a 20-foot radius--

LIAM: Probably close, though-- because he hit us in the air, and then we tumbled forwards. So, I'm going to guess that I'm close to the back of it.

LAURA: Oh, you backed up into it.

LIAM: Oh, you're right.

LAURA: Yeah, you tumbled forward. You backed into the bubble.

LIAM: Sorry, fog of war. Too late. Next.

MATT: Well, all right. So-- Top of the round is Lucien.

SAM: Wait, I never went.

MARISHA: You didn't. Oh, you got jumped by Caleb.

TRAVIS: No, that's right. Beau, Veth, Caleb.

LIAM: (exhales)

MATT: Right, sorry, my bad. Veth, whatchu doing, buddy?

SAM: (blows raspberry) Boy.

LAURA: I don't know!

SAM: I'm going to grab a handful of buttons and throw them.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: And cast Brenatto's Hypnotic Pattern. I'm making that up. (laughter) I'm centering the spot, pretty close to where Lucien and Otis are, and it's any creature in a 30-foot cube.

LIAM: We're about to get mangled.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: With--

MATT: Centered on Lucien?

SAM: Well yeah, so that all five of them are in the cube.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: So how ever far back I need to put that so it doesn't hit my two friends.

SAM: Okay, you got it. You all watch as this cube of colors swirls like an oil slick, you can see the colors and rainbows, but it's just this rapid spiral in the middle of the air. Except for a odd conical shape, coming out from Lucien, right there. About, that big.

LAURA: Wow, that's a big cone.

LIAM: Whoa.

MATT: Where the colors just do not apparate.

LIAM: Is that visible to all? That change in the pattern?

MATT: All who is not in the middle of it. You guys, you both are on the ground, you see colors around you.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: But, from your perspective, it's hard to specify.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: You know what, have both of you roll insight checks for me, if you don't mind. Well, you know what, intelligence, this would be intelligence, this would be figuring out, sorry. My apologies.

LIAM: Just straight intelligence?

MATT: Yep, roll a d20, add your intelligence modifier.

LIAM: 24.

MATT: 24?


MATT: Nine. It alludes you, but immediately pick up exactly what this is. This is some sort of an anti-magic cone effect. So with that being the case, Lucien's going to go ahead--

LIAM: I think about that as I get hacked to pieces in this next round.

MARISHA and LIAM: (laugh)

ASHLEY: Which one is Lucien again?

TALIESIN: Closest to us, bottom.

LIAM: There's a trio of baddies, and he's in that group.

ASHLEY: He's in the trio?

LIAM: The medium-sized figure in the trio.

ASHLEY: Yeah, got it. Okay.

ASHLEY: ♪ (imitates background music horn wail) ♪

MATT: All right, so that does come back.

LAURA: Of course it does.

TALIESIN: I hate all of this.

LIAM: (like Caduceus) I got a bad feeling about this.

MARISHA: Did he just walk up to Cad? Just walks up to Caduceus.

SAM: Did my spell have no effect on anybody?

MATT: Oh, sorry. Put it on those two there.

LIAM: Oh boy, oh boy.

MATT: You see Zoran, like, blinks his eyes momentarily.

SAM: It's a 16 save.

MATT: Yes. Oh, but it's a charm effect. He has advantage against that. And he blinks it out and does not seem to be affected.

MARISHA: Advantage to Zoran?

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Maybe they all have advantage on it, but they're not immune.

MATT: None of them seem to be affected by it, unfortunately.

SAM: Then, for my-- do I see the pouch on Lucien?

MATT: You would have to make a perception check to try and gage that.

SAM: Then I will use my bonus action to make a perception check or that's an action?

MATT: For the sake of all that's going on right now, and with no light around you, snow falling and all this chaos, with just a little bit of firelight from the hammer, it's tough since you did cast a spell this turn, I'd say you have to wait till your next turn to try it.

SAM: Well, then I'll use a bonus action to just move Mage Hand to follow behind Lucien.

MATT: Okay. Move it 30 feet?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay, so not quite to him, but getting in that space.

LAURA: Where is, when Lucien moves, does the cone stay where it was?

MATT: You don't know, because the hypnotic pattern--

SAM: I think it just happens instantly.

MATT: Appears for a moment and then vanishes. So you don't know.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: ♪ (imitates music horn wail) ♪ We've heard the song ♪ too many times tonight. ♪ (laughter)

LIAM: Two big combats in one episode, oh my god.

MATT: He's going to walk up to you with your hands up and be like--

SAM: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

MATT: "It's just business, friend. My apologies, but you didn't have to follow."

LIAM: Oh no.

SAM: Oh god.

MATT: And he puts his hand out towards you.

LAURA: If Taliesin gets killed by his own character.

MARISHA: Oh my god!

MATT: That is a--

LIAM: That is a man going down on himself. Oh my god.

MATT: 24 to hit?

TALIESIN: Oh, that hits.

MATT: Making constitution saving throw for me, please.

MARISHA: He's doing the same shit he did to you that you did to me.

LIAM: Make the save, goddamn it! Gods damn it!

TALIESIN: I'm literally starting to go blind.

LIAM: Make it.


MATT: 19?

TALIESIN: Which is good for me.

MATT: 19 succeeds.

TALIESIN: (sighs)

MATT: So you take, instead--


LIAM: Back to the program.

MATT: Oh, fuck me! Be glad you made the save.

TALIESIN: I already am. (laughter)

SAM: He's bluffing, he's got to be bluffing.

TRAVIS: Get help.


LAURA: Whose Hail Mary?

TALIESIN: I have no Hail Mary.

LIAM: -- has yet to go.

LAURA: You have a Hail Mary. We have a Hail Mary.

TALIESIN: Magic's not working.

LAURA: You don't know.

MATT: Half of 77.

LIAM: It's--

LAURA: He just tried to do a spell on you.


SAM: 38.

MATT: You take 38 points of psychic damage.

TALIESIN: 38 points of psychic damage. Ow! Ow!

MATT: You now just have blood pouring from your face, you nose, you eyes. That finishes Lucien's go. It's now Cree's turn, who is no longer stunned at the end of your turn, correct?

MARISHA: So she cannot do, well, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

MATT: Since you patience defense and that ended, so, Cree can take a turn.

TRAVIS: Got to get out of that cone.

LIAM: Yeah. The cone travels with Lucien.

TRAVIS: It does?

LAURA: Oh, it does?


LAURA: He's like a beholder?


LIAM: I believe so. Well, because, it doesn't make sense for it to stay fixed. A cone to stay fixed in the snow.

LAURA: I would just thinking it would drop or something, but.

MATT: Cree is going to go ahead and cast Cure Wounds on Lucien.

LIAM: (sighs)

MATT: And he is healed up.

LIAM: We're in a tight spot.

SAM: This is not looking great.


MATT: Just going to go ahead and back around here.

SAM: What do we do? Do we concentrate the fire--

MATT: Flanking to his back.

SAM: -- on Lucien, do we talk?

MARISHA: He doesn't seem to be interested in talking.

MATT: Caduceus, it's your turn.

LAURA: They just want to kill.

LIAM: It's either--

LAURA: Get away.

LIAM: Make a stand or flee.

MARISHA: I mean, it feels like we got to run, right?

SAM: Yeah, but, we can't, I guess, Ashley, you can throw Beau on--

ASHLEY: I'm trying to see if I can grab another, that's what I was going to try, but--

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I think I could grab--

SAM: Caleb?

ASHLEY: Caleb.

LAURA: No. No. No. Don't fly in there. Don't fly in there.

TALIESIN: Let's see.

ASHLEY: Is it my turn?


TALIESIN: No, it's my turn, which really fucking sucks.

MARISHA: Yeah, if you fly into that cone, you'll lose.

TRAVIS: Fly around Lucien.

MARISHA: So yeah, stay on Lucien's back.

SAM: Lucien is looking at Caleb right now.

LAURA: Yeah, Lucien's looking, the cone is on both of them right now, don't fly over there.

LIAM: (sighs)



TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

LIAM: Caduceus didn't really understand the cone.

ASHLEY: How did I get Beau if--

SAM: We avoided the cone.

MATT: You swooped down above, and grabbed her and took off. The cone, from what you could see, was this way, and you came down this way, over top of him.

LIAM: And--

MATT: Beauregard was being held to the side, right here. Or to this side it would be in the cone.

SAM: Well, I saw it. I cast my--

MATT: I'll say you got very lucky at the angle you swooped in on.

SAM: I assume I saw it.

LIAM: Oh, he was talking about us being in the middle of it, right?

LAURA: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

LIAM: Cool.

TALIESIN: Getting out of a grapple is an action?

MATT: You're not--

TALIESIN: I'm not grappled, what am I?

MATT: You're not typically grappled, he's just holding your throat. He's not like holding you in place. He just grabbed you to do a shit ton of psychic damage. He's holding on, but it's not a huge thing.

TALIESIN: So I can try and run away?

MATT: You can try.

TALIESIN: (sighs) I'm going to--

LIAM: It's just risking opportunity attack, but he doesn't have you grappled.

TALIESIN: Yeah, so I'm going to--

LIAM: Where you at?

TALIESIN: I'm okay.

LIAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and, not for long, considering what happened there. I'm going to try and use, this is not a spell, but I have a thing where I can turn invisible, I'm going to try and do it as my bonus action.

MATT: Okay. It does not happen.

TALIESIN: Okay. I'm going to try run towards Caleb.

MATT: At this proximity. At this proximity, with your ability to, your passive perception, you can see, while he's holding you and facing you, the red eye on this side of the chest, is currently glowing brighter than the others, who are all just faintly glowing. So there's one eye right here.

TALIESIN: Okay. Okay. I'm just going to try and make a break towards Caleb.

MATT: Towards Caleb? Okay. You run to Caleb.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and grab Caleb, and try and-- fuck.

LIAM: I'll do it.

TALIESIN: Yeah. I'm going to grab Caleb, and I'm going to drag him as far as I can, with what little movement I have left.

MATT: Little movement you have left which direction?

LIAM: (nervous noises)

MATT: Liam?

ASHLEY: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Is Caleb have a feeling about this?


LAURA: (laughs) Just go whichever direction you want to go.

MATT: Can't go away yet.

TALIESIN: Try to just.

MATT: This way?

TALIESIN: Yeah. Just like to no, no, just like to the-- yeah, like--

MATT: This way?

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah, like.

MATT: That's as far as you can get, unfortunately. Because also pushing him and dragging him out the way in forced movement, it reduces your movement by half, so you moved 15 feet to get this way, and like maybe 10 feet--

TALIESIN: Okay. Couldn't quite angle it?

MATT: That's as far as you can get.

MATT: All right. I'm going to for Hail Mary, I'm going to try and--

MATT: Well, you have an action?

TALIESIN: I do have an action.

MATT: You could use your action to move and push you both further, it's up to you.

TALIESIN: (exhales)

LAURA: Are you out of it? I can't tell if you're out of it.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and cast Bless.

MATT: Nothing happens.


MATT: When he walked towards you, he turned to face you at an angle where Caleb was behind you.

LAURA: Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

MATT: That finishes your turn, Caduceus?

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Fuck, I guess so.

MATT: All right, it's Otis' go. Otis is over here. He's going to go ahead and getting the crossbow there, he's going to look over towards the eagle in the air-- or the owl in the air and Eldritch Blast

SAM: Eldritch Blast!

MATT: Three of them towards you.

SAM: Ugh. I hate Otis. (laughter)

MATT: That is 20 to hit?


MATT: 16?


LIAM: My T-shirt is the game today.

MATT: This is against the owl's AC.

ASHLEY: Oh, I don't know the owl's AC.

LAURA: It's 19.

MARISHA: Your T-shirt is all of us.

LAURA: Oh, 17 is the owl's AC.

MATT: So 16 did miss?


MATT: The other one, however, is a natural 20.

LIAM: I do.


TALIESIN: Did I make it harder?

MARISHA: (giggles)

LIAM: No. No, I thought--


MATT: From the two hits, you take seven points of force damage, and then 10 points of force damage. With each of these blasts, you feel this energy sucking you backward. With each hit, you're pulled 10 feet back.

MARISHA: Son of a--

SAM: Is that a thing?!

ASHLEY: Darn it.

SAM: Is that a thing?

LAURA: Fucking...

MATT: It's an Eldritch Invocation.

SAM: (sighs) You can tractor beam?

LAURA: Yep. Yeah, there's a tractor beam.

MATT: Because it was a cantrip, as a bonus action, he can attack with the Mystic Frenzy ability, which means he gets one more. After releasing the Eldritch Blast, goes (bow firing) and fires the crossbow as a bonus action towards you.

LIAM: These bitches aren't playing around.

MATT: That is a--

LIAM: Goddamn it.

ASHLEY: Did you already do the natural 20?

MATT: Yes, I did. It didn't roll that great on the die.


MATT: It's Eldritch Blast, so just a d10. That is a 27 to hit.


LIAM: Mother bitch.

MATT: You take 11 points of piercing damage and six points of lightning damage.


MATT: So how many hit points?

LAURA: You're no longer a giant owl.

MARISHA: Yeah, there's--

LAURA: You would have turned after the... Well, yeah after that hit, you would have turned back into--

LIAM: Goddamn it.

MATT: You all-- You weren't that high up because you're pulled closer to the ground with each hit and you all fall and land in the snow, no longer an eagle.

LIAM: Oh shit. Shit, we are in the shit.

MARISHA: We got to get out of here.

LIAM: We just lost another owl.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: That brings us to Jester's turn.

MARISHA: Got to get out of here. Some way.

TRAVIS: Jester and Fjord.

SAM: I got to get out of here.

MARISHA: (laughs)


LIAM: Fuck!

LAURA: Have a thing.

MARISHA: Do you have any--

LAURA: But I am terrified to do it for fear of my other friends, and never mind because I ♪ already did a 7th-level spell today ♪

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Is that me?

LAURA: No, I did my 6th-level spell healing you. So this takes this out of commission. Never mind.

LIAM: How is this harder than the ancient dragon?

MARISHA: It tracks.

TALIESIN: You move too fast, man.

TRAVIS: Same day? Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, same day.

LIAM: Same day.

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

LIAM: This is the Raishan fight after the Thordak fight.

MARISHA: Oh my god. That's right.

TALIESIN: Oh fuck.

MARISHA: You don't have anything like an Expeditious Retreat in your back pocket?

LIAM: I have some things, but--

TRAVIS: Not in a non-magic cone.


LIAM: Everything I was going to do just changed when another owl fell out of the sky.

LIAM: (sighs)

LAURA: What do I-- I can't cast spells as an owl.


LIAM: Nope. You can hoot, though.

TRAVIS: You could drop it, I guess. Is that an action?

MARISHA: Try and fly someone out?

TALIESIN: Dropping it's--

LIAM: No, dropping it's nothing.

MATT: Dropping it doesn't take an action at all. You can move your eagle's move back 60 feet if you wanted to try and get back--

LIAM: Then drop it. - in the fray and then drop it, but that's up to you.

LIAM: (exhales)

SAM: Yeah, I mean, we can all run.

MARISHA: Well, I mean, if you--

SAM: Like, just run fast.

MARISHA: Well, you said you have Expeditious-- you have stuff, but you can't--

LIAM: No, I do not have Expeditious. I mean, you don't know. No, I don't have that spell prepared. I had ideas, not Expeditious Retreat.

MARISHA: Well, if you have ideas and we can get you out of the non-magical... Oh, no, never mind.

SAM: You could run out of it. No, yes, maybe?

LIAM: For how long?

SAM: And then when you're out of it, do a spell. You know?

LIAM: Yes, that's the first part of any idea I have. Any idea I have starts with dragging Caduceus or me running out of the cone. That's the first part of anything.

MATT: Well, Jester, Fjord, what are you guys doing?

LAURA: Sorry.

MATT: (claps)

LAURA: I'm sorry.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Let's get this TPK going. Come on.

LAURA: Horrible.

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: Can we zoom in a little bit?

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: I can't see it.

LIAM: Yeah, can we get a new angle on the screen?

LAURA: I'm just so--

MATT: Sorry, if I knew this would be this long, I would have just put another snow thing down just to have a better texture. So we're just getting tabletop here.

SAM: It makes it creepier.

LAURA: It's creepier--

MATT: I guess it is night time. That's true.

LAURA: I can't see shit. I guess I'm going to fly in 60 feet.

MATT: All right. Around 60 feet gets you approximately back at this place on the battlefield.

LIAM: You're still fucked up, right?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Everybody's still fucked.

ASHLEY: What if... What if we let them take it?

TALIESIN: They're going to take it anyway.

ASHLEY: And then--

LIAM: Yeah, now they're having fun.

LAURA: They're going to take it anyway.

ASHLEY: We'll just go...

LAURA: Now they're just here to kill.

TRAVIS: What is that thing in the middle, the little clear thing?

MATT: That's his hand.

TRAVIS: Whose hand?

SAM: My hand.

MATT: His magic hand. Mage hand.

LAURA: I can't. If I dove in and tried to grab Beau, I wouldn't be able to get back out, right? That would get me--

MARISHA: It seems like the people in the cone--

LAURA: I'd have to use another action. I'm just going to stay where I am and hopefully Fjord will do something.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: So you're not going to move any closer? You're going to stay where you are?

LAURA: I flew in 60 feet.

MATT: Right, but you still have your action, which you can use the dash and move more or you can stay put.

LAURA: Right.

MARISHA: You guys are still our only potential Hail Mary with the threshold crest.

LAURA: I know, but I don't know what to do with it.

MARISHA: Well, you just have to get out.

LAURA: I know.

MARISHA: So it might be... Yeah, I don't think that's a bad instinct is what I'm saying.

LAURA: To stay?


TRAVIS: I just don't know if you'd get out without us.

LAURA: How far can you attack from? How close do you have to be?

TRAVIS: To attack?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I've got Eldritch Blast, I can shoot from a mile away, but I'm just hitting people.

LAURA: Well, try to hit some people, at least, so we're not just doing nothing.

MATT: But are staying put or moving?

LAURA: I'm staying where I am.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, but hitting people doesn't do anything. I need to move people.

MATT: Make your choice, or we're going to lose the rest of the round. Are you moving or are you staying?

LAURA: I made my choice, I'm staying.

MATT: Okay, staying. All right, Fjord, what are you doing?

TRAVIS: I'll take my 60 seconds to think. (laughter)

MATT: On top of a two minutes that--

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It wasn't my turn. (laughter)

MATT: Respect. Respect.

ASHLEY: (exhales)

LIAM: Fuck.

LIAM: While he's thinking--


LIAM: What's the order? It's Fjord, then what, then what? Then who, then who?

MATT: Fjord, Zoran, Yasha, Beau, Veth, Tyffial, then you, then Lucien.

LIAM: So I can just chill and die.

MARISHA: Fjord, then Zoran?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: And where's Otis? Otis is after Caduceus?

MATT: Otis is-- No, Otis already went after Caduceus. Yeah.

LIAM: 2020 Fjord Zoran.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Can you show me what a 30-foot distance is from where I am into the melee?

SAM: He's immune to charm, but he's not immune to spells.

TRAVIS: Because I don't see any squares.

SAM: But he does have legendary resistances, right?

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Which he hasn't used?

MATT: 30 feet's about there.

SAM: Wait, no, he has legendary actions.

TRAVIS: Gotcha, okay.

LIAM: We don't know if he has resistances or not.

MARISHA: Well, he saved from--

ASHLEY: That's how far the cone goes?

MATT: No, that's 30 feet from where he is.

MARISHA: No, I thinking I'm getting--

MATT: You guy don't know how far the cone goes, you just know the shape of it.

SAM: We saw him use a legendary action.


LAURA: That was it? That was 30 feet?

SAM: But not a legendary resistance.

MARISHA: We haven't seen that yet.

TRAVIS: I'm going to use my--

SAM: Fuck.

MARISHA: I know.

TRAVIS: I'm going to go in on foot 30 feet. No. No, 30 feet won't get me close enough. I'm going to...

MATT: Do you want Jester to carry you both closer?

LAURA: I can. I have movement. You can hee-yah me, if you want.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah, you want to get me within 30 feet?

LAURA: Sure.

TRAVIS: Do it.

LAURA: We've got the move right after each other, so it makes sense.

MATT: You can right there, if you want to keep it not too close.


LAURA: Are you jumping off or are you just...

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm getting off.

MATT: All right, so you jump off about there.

LAURA: Can I use the rest of my movement to back up?

MATT: If you want to. (wings flapping)


MATT: About there?

LAURA: Sure. I just want to-- Yeah, I want to be far away from Lucien.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: I'm going to use my bonus action to Channel Divinity, Fury of the Tides. I'm going to walk up to this side of Lucien and I'm going to take two swings at him with--

MATT: That's not Lucien, that's Tyffial. Lucien's over here.

TRAVIS: Oh. Well, that changes shit. I saw a bright coat. I thought that was Moll-- Lucien.

MATT: Sorry, there you go. There's the bright coat.

TRAVIS: Fuck, and he's-- Oh, fuck me. So the cone's facing this way?

MATT: You assumed it was facing somewhere in the direction that he was facing when he came over towards Caduceus.

LAURA: Yeah, wherever his eyes are.

MARISHA: You all right?

LIAM: As if real life wasn't giving me enough panic attacks.

MARISHA: Oh man, this is awesome.

LIAM: But we had to come here to manufacture a faux panic attack.

TRAVIS: I'm doing this. Doing this.

ASHLEY: I love it.

MATT: You don't know.

TALIESIN: This is real. I'm having a real panic attack.

SAM: You might be standing in it right now.

TRAVIS: The only thing that gave you any indication was that Hypnotic Pattern, that one flash of energy gave you a momentary view of the area of negative space where the magic could not penetrate. Beyond that, it's guesswork.


MARISHA: Need a Hail Mary.

LIAM: Cut off the head of the snake.

TRAVIS: Yeah. All right. I will-- I'm going to cast-- None of this is good. I'm going to cast Far Step with my bonus action.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: I'm going to appear on the opposite side of Lucien.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: 60 feet. Yeah, I'll walk however close I need to bamf 60 feet on the opposite side of Lucien.

MATT: You're on the opposite side of Lucien.

TRAVIS: And I am going to... Grapple or hit? Grapple or hit? Grapple or hit?

LIAM: Where is that shit?

MATT: What are you doing, buddy?

TRAVIS: I'm going to hit. Two swings, Star Razor.

MATT: Okay. He's going to go ahead and use his reaction to use Blood Curse of the Eyeless. He takes some damage on that.

LIAM: There you are.

MATT: And all of your attacks have disadvantage.

TRAVIS: Boy, that is unfortunate. Six plus-- 13. That's 19 to hit?

MATT: Misses.

SAM: Damn it!

TRAVIS: That is 11, 24 to hit?

MATT: 24 hits.


MARISHA: Lucien?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: All right, that's good. Plus eight, 17. He's not cursed in any way. Yeah, 17 points of force damage.

MATT: Okay. That's your attack?

TRAVIS: That is my turn.

MATT: Okay, end of your turn, he's going to use a legendary action to take a swing at you with one of his scimitars. (whooshing) Just like not even looking at you, just strikes behind.

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

MATT: That is going to be a 20 to hit.


MATT: That hits, okay.

LIAM: My only plan is to Hail Mary.

MATT: You take...

LIAM: (sighing)

MARISHA: Yours is, or isn't?

MATT: 14 points of slashing damage and 10 points of psychic damage from the strike.


MATT: Also, as the slice cuts through your chest, you watch as the blood suddenly glows red in a symbol. This arcane symbol burns into your chest, beneath the armor. It glows through for a minute, and you're like, "Augh!" And you feel this searing sensation in your chest, and the glow is just staying there through the armor. You've been branded or marked in some way.


SAM: Cool, cool.

ASHLEY: Cool, cool, cool.

TRAVIS: Good stuff.

SAM: Going great.

MATT: So that's your turn, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

MATT: All right. Zoran's going to go ahead and move over to here to flank.

SAM: We're trying to just get out of here.

MARISHA: We got to get the fuck out of here.

SAM: Fjord can get out of here.

MATT: He has advantage against you because he's flanking with Lucien.

SAM: Fjord can bamf.

MATT: Yeah, that's 27.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it hits.

TALIESIN: Does he have night vision?

MATT: He doesn't need it.

TALIESIN: Fuck. Trying everything.

MATT: I know, I know.

TALIESIN: Trying fucking everything.

MATT: The first one hits; the second one is a 19.

TRAVIS: That is my armor class.

MATT: So it does hit, all right.


MATT: So you take 11 points of bludgeoning damage, plus four points of fire.


MATT: And 13 points of bludgeoning damage, and two points of fire.


MATT: That's Zoran's go. He's going to action surge.

LIAM: Is the battlefield still semi-illuminated by flame?

MATT: Yes, a little bit, around them.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: And my Star Razor--

MATT: Zoran's going to action surge, and he's going to go ahead and strike against you two more times with advantage. That hits. And yeah, they both hit.

TRAVIS: I forgot to roll d12s. He takes... Oh, it's nine.

LIAM: This is FUBAR.

TRAVIS: He takes 13 points of radiant damage.

MATT: Good call.

MARISHA: Stay cool. Stay calm.

TRAVIS: In those first two.

SAM: You got this.

MARISHA: We got this.

TRAVIS: Oh. He takes 13 points of radiant damage. And I will teleport 15 feet away.

MARISHA: Hell, yes.

MATT: Oh shit.

MARISHA: Hell, yes.

MATT: Where are you going?

TRAVIS: I will make them chase me.

MARISHA: Yasha, how fast are you?

MATT: That way?

MARISHA: You're fast too, right?

ASHLEY: I'm fast. 50 feet.

SAM: Who took damage? Lucien?

MARISHA: We can help drag these slow pokes.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: So really, let's say those first two hit, because I would've teleported after the first one. So maybe the action surge you want to bring back, or do you want to have him come to me and use the action surge?

MATT: I don't know if he has enough movement to do that.


MARISHA: (exhaling)

MATT: Yeah, he would.

MARISHA: But, yeah. You can--


MARISHA: Maybe go--

MATT: He's going to come in and do with a two. So those both still hit.

SAM: Did you deal damage to the big guy?

MATT: So that's still nine points of bludgeoning.

TALIESIN: They wouldn't have had advantage.

MARISHA: Caleb or Caduceus, either/or.

MATT: That's true.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: So good call on that. Re-rolling those attacks. That hits. That is a 17, which I think misses.

TRAVIS: It does miss.

TALIESIN: (exhales) One less.

MATT: So you take 15 points of bludgeoning damage, and one point of fire damage.

TRAVIS: Cool, he takes another nine? Nine points of radiant damage. And I will teleport another 15 feet away from him.

LAURA: That's tight.

TRAVIS: Kind of tight.

LIAM: (whispering) I don't know if we're all going to get out of here.

TRAVIS: I wanted Lucien's eye, though.

MATT: Probably should specify that. I'm pretty sure the--

TRAVIS: Is it only a one-time thing?

MATT: I think the teleport away is like--

TRAVIS: "In addition, whenever a creature within five feet hits you with a melee attack, the sword bursts-- 1d12 radiant damage to the attacker-- You can use your reaction--" It only happens once.

MATT: Yeah, I was going to say. There's limitations. So you do it once.

MARISHA: But we want to get them--

MATT: All right, so that finishes Zoran's go.

MARISHA: Because the cone is--

MATT: Yasha, you're up, with Beau.

MARISHA: -- that way.

ASHLEY: (exhales) Okay.

SAM: Does he have that fucking pouch or not?

MARISHA: Is it Yasha and Beau at the same--? No, she goes first, right?

MATT: Yeah, Yasha, you're up first.

TRAVIS: Has everybody looked to see if it's on Lucien?

SAM: I can't waste a whole action looking.

ASHLEY: Okay, so we don't know where the cone--

TRAVIS: Would it be an action to see if the bag of holding is hanging off of Lucien anywhere?

MATT: In this darkness and this chaos, yeah. I would-- Well, continue.

SAM: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Listen, we'd love out of this fight, trust me.

MATT: All right, Yasha. You're up.

SAM: Oh boy.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Haven't gotten one of those in a while.

MARISHA: What was that?

LAURA: Him going, "Get the fuck out or you're all going to die."

SAM: That's Matt being worried for us as friends. (laughs)

ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay.

MARISHA: The cone is basically his eye line.

ASHLEY: His eye line.

MARISHA: Yeah. It's wherever his eyeballs are facing.

ASHLEY: But I wonder if I grab Caleb.

MARISHA: Uh huh.

SAM: You can physically grab anything. It's just magic that's canceled.

MARISHA: Yeah, and just drag his ass.

ASHLEY: Are my--

SAM: -- muscles magic?

ASHLEY: They're very-- they're so magical. The wings.

MATT: Yes?

ASHLEY: Is that magical or is that just a part of who I am?

MATT: You don't know. That's something to find out.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: The wings, is that what you're saying?

ASHLEY: Yeah. Can (whooshing)

MARISHA: I don't know.

SAM: How do they feel?


MARISHA: I guess if they go away, you still have your legs.

ASHLEY: If they go away, they go way.



MATT: You would say they are built of divine energy, which might inform a little bit.


ASHLEY: That means, that's probably--

LAURA: You're magic.


SAM: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay, okay. How far am I? I'm so sorry, this is so stressful. How far am I to Caleb and Caduceus?

MATT: You're about 30 feet from Caleb.


LIAM: Fuck.

ASHLEY: I am going to run over to Caleb.

LIAM: (groans)

MATT: Okay. So that's 30 feet.

ASHLEY: That's all I got so far. Give me a second. Okay, so from there--


ASHLEY: Ooh, I'm going to just bamf out my wings and try to grab them and fly away and see what happens. This is so stupid.

LIAM: Where we are is no good.

ASHLEY: Where we are is still no good because you already tried it.

LIAM: Yep.


SAM: Yep.

LAURA: You might be just out of it now, though. You're five feet further.

ASHLEY: I'm five feet further, so...

LIAM: Yeah, you are, technically.

MATT: So you spend an action--

LIAM: A hair further.

MATT: -- to do this, are you doing it or not?

ASHLEY: No, you already-- I feel like you gave me a clue.

MATT: No, I was answering your question.


LAURA: Just do it.

ASHLEY: This is so stressful.

LAURA: Use some magic, just do it.

MATT: It's D&D; make a choice.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all right. If it's a TPK, it is fucking amazing.

ASHLEY: All right, the wings are coming out.

MATT: (whoosh)

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: They emerge, brightening the space around you. You appear to be on the outskirts of this area.

MARISHA: Oh my god. You are five feet in the clear.

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: And you have Caleb there. It's your action to do that. So you still have 20 feet of movement. Because you have flight, I'll say I'll add an additional 30 feet of movement with your wings, if you want to. So you have 50 feet a movement with your wings.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I will grab him. I will grab Caleb and just (whoosh) towards this way, Jester, owl, and yeah.

MATT: That will get you about there.

ASHLEY: Okay, and still just floaties. Floaties with Caleb.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Oh shit. That changes everything.

ASHLEY: Does it? Is it bad?

LIAM: It doesn't matter.

MARISHA: We got this, we got this. Don't lose hope, man!

LIAM: I just have to think of new ideas.

SAM: Caduceus is a lost cause. Let's go.

LAURA: No! (laughter)

LIAM: No, we did that already.

SAM: Let's get out of here.

LIAM: That happened in episode 20-something.

MATT: That's you right there. All right, that finishes Yasha's go. Beau, what are you doing?

MARISHA: Okay, I am jogging over.

SAM: Good, don't, don't--

LAURA: Don't go t--

SAM: Don't go too far away!

MARISHA: I'm going to go get Caduceus. Calm down.

TALIESIN: (whimpers)

MARISHA: I am going to move-- I just want to move over here in this pocket, like in this angle. Not too close. I want to be 30 feet away from-- To go here-ish. Does that-- you see?

MATT: Where, here?

MARISHA: Yep, yep. Is that--?

TALIESIN: You have six hit points. What are you doing?

MARISHA: I don't have six hit points. Calm down. I'm going to go right here.

LIAM: Nobody's calm.

MATT: Between them? Right there?


LIAM: Oh my god.

LAURA: What?

MARISHA: Wait, wait, wait.

LAURA: Beau!

MARISHA: Wait a minute! I want to go back a little. Am I 30 feet away from Lucien?

MATT: This is Tyffial.

MARISHA: I know. I want to be--

MATT: No, you are more than 30 feet.

MARISHA: I want to move here, beside Tyffial, and would that maybe put me within-ish 30 feet?

MATT: Oh yeah, you'd be within 30 feet over here.

MARISHA: That's what I want. That's what I want.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: And I want to take out my Belabor, aiming it towards Mollymauk, and I'm going to--

MATT: Or Lucien.

MARISHA: Lucien, yeah.

LIAM: Right, purple guy.

MARISHA: Purple guy. And I'm going to take my staff and I want to expend one of the charges to do my big-- I don't know, spin it overhead as I gather energy and I'm going to sweep it in a big arc towards him, and I want to do my-- And it doesn't have an ability. I want to send an arc towards Lucien.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Anyone within five feet of him have to make a DC 15 strength saving throw.

MATT: Okay. So Lucien and Cree will be hit by this.


MATT: All right, so Lucien does not succeed on the saving throw. He'll use a legendary resistance to succeed.

MARISHA: He has them?

LAURA: Yeah.


LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: And then Cree makes her save.


SAM: Is it one or three, or two?

LAURA: Three.


TALIESIN: Gets them back with a short rest, I imagine.

MARISHA: Well, they, I guess, they suffer half damage still of 3d8 force damage.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I think short rest brought back the legendary actions.

TRAVIS: He only used one before anyway, so.

TALIESIN: One or two? Yeah, he used one.

MARISHA: Okay. What is that? A two, eight, nine, 10, 16 force. No, sorry. That's 16 total, halved. So eight force damage.

MATT: Eight to both. You got it.

LIAM: So you're attacking Luci?

MATT: Both get blasted back a little bit.

MARISHA: I was trying to push them back 15 feet, and it didn't work. He failed and then saved, and then she saved.

MATT: So that's your action. You moved about, from where you were, 15 feet. So you still have the rest of your movements.

MARISHA: Can I do Step of the Wind, grab Caduceus, and start dragging his ass back?

MATT: Sure, we'll say it's 20 feet to get to him.


MATT: So 15, 20, so that's 35 feet you've used. How much more movement do you have?

MARISHA: And then, Step of the Wind for my bonus action.

MATT: How much more movement do you have before Step of the Wind?

MARISHA: Oh, well, I have 50 feet total. So 30.

MATT: All right. So 15 feet, you move him back that far, and then you can use Step of the Wind to move him another 25 feet.

MARISHA: Let's do it.

MATT: Okay, that'll get you about there.

MARISHA: We're at least all together now. Yes?

SAM: That's good.

LAURA: Okay, okay.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Now, that's--

LAURA: Until he turns toward us. (laughs)

MARISHA: That's it, but we're all together now. So whatever the fuck we need to do, if we need to bamf back to your house.

MATT: Well, you're all together, except for Fjord.

LIAM: Yeah, Fjord.

LAURA: Fjord is on the there side of the field.


TRAVIS: Just do it.

LIAM: (grunting)


TRAVIS: Do it. Numbers. Numbers game.

MARISHA: I'm done. I'm done. That's my turn. I've got everybody there. That's all I got.

TALIESIN: Get everybody home.

LAURA: We can't get everybody home. I don't have a 6th-level spell anymore. I can't do it. So the most we can get is six people out with Caduceus.

SAM: Or we can just run.

TRAVIS: If they don't chase.

LAURA: They will chase, but.


LIAM: But we've got three people on foot. Even if we were to damn Fjord to die, we have three people on foot.

LAURA: We can both polymorph somebody. Well, you can polymorph.

LIAM: You can't polymorph from-- I can, one, me or one of them, to pick one of... Maybe.

SAM: Me and Beau are super fast.

MARISHA: I could honestly move at competitive speed towards the owls. I have 50 feet of movement.

MATT: Well regardless, Veth, it's your turn.

SAM: It's my turn!

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: What happened to Caleb?

LAURA: Caleb, is after you.

MATT: Caleb is last.

SAM: Oh, really? Oh, that's right. It flipped last time.

MATT: Well, it's Tyffial, and then it's Caleb.

SAM: Shit. Shit.

LIAM: What's your wing speed?

MARISHA: Do you have anything to Dimension Door?

ASHLEY: But I have 50--

MARISHA: Okay, okay.

ASHLEY: If I'm on the ground, I have 50.

SAM: I'm so useless in this fight.

SAM: I can't move anyone, I can't heal anyone.

MARISHA: He can still bamf. We just need to fucking go.

SAM: Yeah, I can run, but as soon as he turns his head, we're fucked. Is it a concentration? Should I try to break his concentration by just hitting him?

LAURA: Hit him in the head. Shoot him in the head.

MARISHA: I don't think--

TALIESIN: I think we fucking run.

MARISHA: I don't think you can break it. It's in his tattoo.

SAM: Yeah, I don't know that, though.

TALIESIN: I think we fucking run.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I hit him once, and I don't think it broke it.

SAM: You did hit him?

TRAVIS: I did hit him, but--

ASHLEY: How did the word get out?

MARISHA: I technically just hit him with 3d8.

LAURA: Abilities.


TALIESIN: So yeah, I think we just fucking run. I will definitely be saying: Run, run, run.

MATT: What you doing, Veth?

SAM: I can still run after I try something. So I will do that. I will-- He's got legendary resistances. Fuck! I'll try Phantasmal Force on Lucien.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: He's immune to psychic damage.

SAM: It's not damage.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: He can't be charmed.

SAM: It's not a charm.

LIAM: Tal, did you move yourself? You got pulled over?

TALIESIN: I haven't moved myself yet.

SAM: It's an illusion that is in his mind.

TALIESIN: We're close enough.

SAM: It's not a charm.

MATT: So he has to make an intelligence saving throw.

SAM: Yes.

MATT: That is a 12.

SAM: 16.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: What are you doing?

MARISHA: Oh my god.

SAM: He sees Caleb, the real Caleb, the other way.

TRAVIS: Towards Matt?

SAM: Yeah, it's hard for me to gauge, but--

MATT: This direction?

SAM: If he's looking forward, turn him left.

MATT: All right, so fake Caleb we'll say is here, right?

SAM: Yeah, that's the real Caleb, and the real Caleb is doing this and getting ready to cast a fucking amazing spell at him.

MATT: Okay. Okay. That's your action.

SAM: Then I will run.

MATT: Which way?

SAM: Away.

MATT: Just away from everyone?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Yeah, that's a good direction to go.

MATT: Bonus action run as well?

SAM: Sure.

ASHLEY: This is so stressful.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's it. Let's do this.

MATT: Okay, ending your turn, that brings us to Tyffial's turn. Tyffial is going to go ahead and turn and head up towards Caduceus. And seeing you all gather up closely, is going to go ahead and take bonus action to once again, strike the blade across. The black tendrils appear again. Is going to go ahead and make two strikes against you. That is a 19 to hit.

TALIESIN: It misses and I'm using shield of retribution.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Ooh! Okay. That was a snarky miss.

TALIESIN: "Blast with arcane force--"

MATT: He's the master of snarky misses.


MATT: Nobody gives reactionary fuck yous like Taliesin does. (laughter)

MATT: It's my favorite thing.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: Except when it's canceling a crit that I got.

TALIESIN: 14 points of force damage.

MATT: 14 points of force damage.

TALIESIN: And make a strength saving throw.

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: Pretty strong, but didn't roll great. A 14?

TALIESIN: Nope. You get pushed 20 feet away from me.


LAURA: Okay, that's good. That's good.

ASHLEY: Awesome.

MATT: Okay. Tyffial (pained grunt) "Shit!" And takes one more step forward, but that's the extent of her movement this turn. That finishes-- Caleb, you're up.

TALIESIN: Not my turn. That was a reaction.

MATT: Yup.

ASHLEY: Awesome.

SAM: Nice.

LIAM: That was a reaction?

TALIESIN: That was a reaction.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Caleb, it's your turn.

LAURA: He's going after you.

TALIESIN: My turn is immediately after you.

LIAM: Immediately after me?

LAURA: You're immediately after Lucien.



TALIESIN: Yeah, immediately after Lucien.

LAURA: Lucien goes after you.

MATT: It's Lucien, then it's Cree, and then it's Caduceus.


SAM: -- would like to rage.

LIAM: -- will turn-- (chuckling)

LIAM: -- Beauregard into a giant mammoth.

SAM: Mammoth?

LIAM: Yeah, with 126 hit points and a speed of 40 feet, which is the same as an owl.

SAM: Okay, okay. And a lot of people can jump on.


LIAM: That's what I'm doing.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: What about you?

LIAM: I'm in Yasha's arms.

MARISHA: We're all together, except for Fjord.

SAM: Fjord's fine.

MARISHA: If we can continue to kite them, even if they follow us, if we can move, and then fight as we move, we might eventually be able to get away.

LIAM: You have 126 hit points.

MARISHA: Thank you.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: How many did you have?


LIAM: Cool.

SAM: That helps.

LAURA: As long as-- Whatever.

MATT: So Caleb, you're being held by Yasha. Cast a spell.

LAURA: Turn and run.

MATT: That's your turn.

SAM: Yeah, he's going to look at Caleb, right? Right?

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: He failed his save on it.

LIAM: Yeah, he failed to save, so he believes it.

MATT: He does. I'm going to roll to see which one he's most worried about. I mean, you guys are all clustered there.

LIAM: (exhales)

LIAM: Caleb is doing this.

SAM: Yeah, he's doing Naruto shit. He's doing Naruto moves.

MATT: (laughs)

LIAM: Kamehameha! (laughter)

SAM: The fire's starting in his hands. It looks bad.

LAURA: Not fire.

SAM: No, not fire. Plasma. Plasma!

ASHLEY: Yeah, lightning.

SAM: I don't know what that is. He's doing it, though. It's crazy.

MATT: One to 10--

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

MATT: -- he focuses on him. 11 to 20, he focuses that way.


SAM: I can't see it. No one can.

MARISHA: We can't see it. Turn the camera! Turn the PTZ!

MATT: It's an eight. (shouting) (laughter)

MATT: Can you see that on the camera?


LAURA: We saw it, we saw it.

MARISHA: (sighs)

MATT: Oh god.

SAM: Oh god! (shouting)

MATT: You see him still standing there. Not changing the direction that he's facing, but suddenly this Caleb vanishes.

SAM: Oh, okay, that didn't go like I wanted it to.

MARISHA: Well, he's magic.


MARISHA: Magic Caleb.

MATT: Well, we'll note that this isn't an actual illusion. This is something he sees in his head, technically, right?

MARISHA and SAM: Yeah.

MATT: So, no. Actually, he still continues to focus over in that way as the spell continues to go. It wasn't an illusion you've placed; it's in his mind, it maintains. At least until he gets to try for a second.

LAURA: (fake sobs) Gonna cry.

MATT: So, he's going to go ahead and move up. Lucien goes, (sighs) "Claim the rest. The wizard's mine." He's going to step forward.

ASHLEY: Yes, go get him.

MATT: The blades out, and is going to go into a full (swishing) whirlwind. Dervish strike force against this casting Caleb. Everything seems to go through him. No reaction, no effect. The jig is up from this point. But he's unhappy about that.

MARISHA: We put some distance.

MATT: Lucien--

MARISHA: We put some distance.

MATT: -- turns around.

LIAM: ♪ Turn around ♪

ASHLEY: ♪ Every now and then I get a little bit scared ♪

MATT: Okay. That's makes it Cree's turn.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

MATT: Cree--

LIAM: Fuck. Have to go to the bathroom again.

ASHLEY and TALIESIN: I know, I got to go to the bathroom so bad.

TALIESIN: Weird question,

ASHLEY: Just pounding the tea.

TALIESIN: Just quick, weird question.

MATT: Yeah?

TALIESIN: Are all of his people now in his cone?


TALIESIN: Okay. Just curious.

MATT: Oddly, no.


MARISHA: They're special.

SAM: Oh, they're a hive mind or something? Maybe they don't--

MARISHA: They're not.

MATT: Well, no. They've been affected by it.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: But just--

SAM: Right now, it's not working.

MATT: Well, you don't know, you don't see any variation. You just see him walk off into the snow and turn around angrily.

TALIESIN: I thought that there was, like, that they were lit up or something.

MATT: Correct. The energy on Tyffial's sword has not vanished.


MATT: Okay. That brings us to Cree, who is going to cast Slow on all of you.


SAM: Counterspell that. Wait!


SAM: Caleb's here. Caleb's counterspelling it.

LAURA: Counterspell it! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Where is Cree?

SAM: (German accent) I would like to Counterspell.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: At 4th-level.

TRAVIS: Where's Cree?

MATT: Cree's over there.

TRAVIS: Next to me?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: I see the Slow and I would like to Counterspell.

TRAVIS: Does that count as an action or a reaction?

MATT: Counterspell?


MATT: It's a reaction.

MATT: I have a Counterspell.

LAURA: Will you still be able to do other things?


LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: I'll Counterspell. Cause Caleb's not here.

MATT: Counterspell? What's the range on Counterspell?

TRAVIS: 60 feet.

MATT: 60 feet.

MARISHA: Yes, yes.

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

MATT: Okay. Otis is going to Counterspell your Counterspell.

LAURA: No, Caleb would--

SAM: (German accent) Caleb would Counterspell the Counterspell.

LAURA: Caleb! (laughter)

LAURA: What are we going to do?

MATT: Which he would do.

LAURA: He would totally do it.

MATT: I don't, I want it--

SAM: We should wait till it he gets back.

MATT: I should wait till he gets back.

SAM: No, that's the worst!

MATT: I know.

SAM: Let's all go to the bathroom and get him. Wait. We need you! Get back here!

LAURA: We need you to Counterspell.

MARISHA: Counterspell!

TRAVIS: We got Counterspell and counterspell Counterspell.

LIAM: Tell me what happened, tell me what happened.

MATT: So Cree cast Slow on that group of all of you right there.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: Fjord Counterspelled it. Otis counterspelled his Counterspell.

LIAM: I've been thinking Counterspell for a fucking hour, Counterspell! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Is this a triple Counterspell?


MATT: It is.

LIAM: At a-- d-d-d--

LAURA: (plinking)

LIAM: Oh my gosh.

ASHLEY: You can't triple stamp another--

LIAM: At 4th-level, at 4th-level.

MATT: Slow fails.


MATT: The Counterspell from Fjord goes through. Otis' Counterspell is negated by you.

LIAM: Ooh.

MATT: That's some blue magic shit right there.

LIAM: That is all I've been fucking thinking for an hour.

MARISHA: I reek, I smell so bad.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'm sweating.

MATT: Caduceus. It's your turn.

TALIESIN: I'm getting on top of the mammoth.

MATT: You get on top of the mammoth.

SAM: Feels like we've been-- remember when I said I didn't want it to end? I want it to end now. I want it to be over. (laughter) You can stop.

SAM: Please.

LAURA: I think this might be one of the longest games we've ever played.

SAM: I'm going to barf.

LAURA: I'm feeling I'm going to barf.

TALIESIN: Everybody's--

LIAM: He's already dead.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I got-- since I don't really have much I can do beyond getting on a mammoth. I'm just going to-- Who's within 30 feet of me?

LAURA: Pretty much all of us, except for Fjord.

MATT: All of you except for Fjord. Oh and Veth, Veth is too far.

TALIESIN: Okay, Just for shits and giggles. I'm going to... cast Bless on anybody who's-- I'm going to cast four blesses basically on anybody who's moving. So Bless on the mammoth, Bless on Yasha. Who else is a--?

LAURA: I'm a mover.

TALIESIN: Bless on Jester.

ASHLEY: That's a d4, right?

TALIESIN: Yes, it's a d4 to saves and--

MARISHA: Oh wait, did you just bless me?

TALIESIN: And you.

SAM: As the mammoth.

MARISHA: Oh, and me. As the movers?

TALIESIN: The movers.

MATT: And who's the fourth one?

TALIESIN: Beau. And it's--

MATT: And yourself?


SAM: Beau is the mammoth.

MATT: We have Yasha, Jester, Beau, and who else?

TALIESIN: Oh, Yasha, Jester, Beau and--

SAM: It's either Caleb or me. Caleb's closer.

MATT and TALIESIN: Not you.

TALIESIN: You're not there, Caleb.

LAURA: You're too far.

MATT: Caleb. All right, you got it.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's 1d4 for saving throws and--

MARISHA: Blessed.

TALIESIN and MATT: Attack rolls.

MATT: Yep.

LIAM: I feel blessed.

MATT: All right that finishes your go, Caduceus. You're climbing onto the mammoth, holding onto the side of the fur. Just holding on for dear life.

TALIESIN: I'm holding on.

MATT: All right. It's Otis' turn.

MARISHA: Got this.

MATT: Otis--

SAM: Fuck you, Otis.

MATT: -- is going to go ahead and throw three Eldritch Blasts at you.

LAURA: To try to pull you back.

MATT: That is going to be a 25 to hit.

TALIESIN: It does.

MATT: You take three points of force damage.

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

MATT: And get yanked off the mammoth.

SAM: Ugh, this fucking guy.

MATT: Next attack is 12.


MATT: And 13, he rolled a two and a three.


MATT: So yeah, that's it. And as a bonus action he's going to go ahead and shoot you with his crossbow.

TALIESIN: That close?

MATT: You're still 10 feet from him. You're not quite up against him. And that is going to miss, 14 to hit.

TALIESIN: Is there anything I can do?

TRAVIS: Is he that little mini that's right behind Caduceus?

MATT: Yep.


MATT: Little halfling. Jester, your go.

TRAVIS: I lost him in the--

LAURA: I'm going to fly forward, grab Caduceus.

MATT: Grab Caduceus.

LAURA: And fly towards Veth.

MATT: This way. You got it. Okay.

LAURA: Can I use-- was that my action, grabbing Caduceus?

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: That gets you about there.

ASHLEY: Where's Beau? Oh, she's the mammoth.

LIAM: She's a may-moth.

ASHLEY: Panicked for a minute.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Thank you.

LIAM: The mammoth is blue. Obviously blue.


MARISHA: Yeah, yeah. Blue, blue mammoth.

MATT: That brings us to-- that's Jester's turn. Fjord, you're up.

LIAM: Mammoth.

TRAVIS: Can I see Lucien from where I am? I can, with darkvision 60 feet?

MATT: You can. Yeah.

TRAVIS: Just for my own edification, does he have any kind of a bag of holding around his person? Around his waist? I don't want to spend an action if that's what it'll take. I'll forego that. I'm just curious before I run for my fucking life.

MATT: If you want to spend an--

TRAVIS: Nah, I don't want to spend anything.

LAURA: Bonus action?

MATT: I will say at your passive perception, it's hard to tell, It's low light.

TRAVIS: Okay, that's fair. With my--

MATT: And you have a fire, a flaming war hammer in front of you. And so when you have that bright light versus a dark background, your eyes are adjusted and you don't make out much detail at this distance.

TRAVIS: That's totally fair. I will use my bonus action to Far Step 60 feet towards the rest of the party.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Can you Far Step onto Beau?


LIAM: Onto a mammoth?

TRAVIS: Is Beau the mammoth?


TRAVIS: Yes, I can.

MATT: (whooshes) Onto the mammoth.

ASHLEY: Awesome.


TRAVIS: Is there a reason I'm doing that and not running an additional 30 feet away?


SAM: For love.

MARISHA: I can sweep you up--

MATT: Well, you're there.

MARISHA: -- on the way.

TRAVIS: I'll just keep running 30 feet in the direction that everybody else is going.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, get the fuck out of Dodge.

MATT: You've got it. All right, that finishes your turn, Fjord. It's now Zoran's turn. He is going to go ahead and move up to the mammoth and take two swings with the giant flaming mall.

MARISHA: Where's my mammoth's AC?

LIAM: 126.



MATT: I was like, Jesus Christ!

LIAM: It's 126. (laughter)

LIAM: It is 13.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: Hits. Hits.

LIAM: Dat ass.


MATT: So you take 12 points of bludgeoning damage and five fire. And 10 points of bludgeoning damage, two fire.

MARISHA: Okay, great.

MATT: That finishes Zoran's turn. Yasha, you're up.


TALIESIN: What did I miss?

ASHLEY: I'm going to keep flying us,

MARISHA: Not much.

ASHLEY: I can fly 30 feet, so that a-way.

TALIESIN: Oh, good.

MATT: Here you go. That'll get you about there. That finishes Yasha's turn. Beau.

ASHLEY: Oh! Hang on, hang on, hang on. Oh, I can't do it. I already did it today. Nevermind, good. Good to go.

MARISHA: So Jester-- everyone's accounted for. Is everyone on a ride except for Fjord and Veth?

SAM and LAURA: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Fjord's on you.


MARISHA: Fjord forward ran past.

LIAM: Ran past?

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: So I want to run forward.

MATT: What's your movement as a mammoth?

MARISHA: Apparently 40.

LIAM: 40 for movement, yeah.

MATT: This way, this way?

MARISHA: I want to run and can I, not harm, but scoop up was my tusks Fjord and Veth on the way?

MATT: Fjord you can. You can't get to Veth. But I'll say-- I'll let you do that.

TALIESIN: Veth is fast.

SAM: I'm faster than you.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah

MARISHA: Don't move them back. I want to move forward.

MATT: No, I'm putting them on there and then moving you forward.

TRAVIS: God, don't put us closer to the--

TALIESIN: Yeah, is that an action or is that a--

MATT: That's your action to scoop them up.


MARISHA: As-- okay. As it--

MATT: It takes the coordination to get down and try and scoop them up, cause you're basically giving him forced movement onto your back. So you're placing him.

MARISHA: I'll still get them further than what we will and then I'll move another 40.

MATT: Well, it's your action to do that. So you moved. So that's as far as you can get right there. We'll say with the 40 feet--

LIAM: Scoop up is the action.

MATT: Scooping him up is the action and you moved 40 feet.


MATT: Yeah.


MATT: Yeah, so you're good. Okay.

MARISHA: I still got him further away than what he was, correct?

MATT: Yes.


MATT: Veth.

SAM: Um, I'm going to shoot, but-- and then run. But who should I aim for? That Otis is a problem.

LAURA: Yeah, because they've got distance.

SAM: Um, the big guy can run, too, right?

LAURA: It seemed like his movement was more than 30 feet. Cause Fjord went an extra 30 feet and then Zoran moved towards Beau and went farther than Fjord did. So maybe his movement is like 40 or...

SAM: But I hate Otis.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Veth, what you doing?

SAM: I'm loading my (whooshing) bola bolt.

MATT: Okay.


SAM: And I just got to figure out who I'm shooting it at. I hate Otis. I'm going to shoot it at Otis.

TRAVIS: Caleb?

MATT: Okay, go for it. Roll for an attack.

SAM: Um, where's my dice? My dice are gone. There they are. Uh.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: 25.

MATT: 25 hits.

SAM: So like no damage.

LIAM: [inaudible]

SAM: I'm just going to try wrap it around--

MATT: You got it.

SAM: -- his fucking feet.

LIAM: I've got it.

MATT: Yeah, he (whooshing) gets knocked to the ground prone.


LAURA: Nice, nice.

SAM: Okay, and then I'm going to run and dash.

MATT: All right. (whooshing) You are off the board. You are--

SAM: Bye, guys

MATT: -- 60 feet that way.

MARISHA: Yeah, go.

SAM: Catch up!

MARISHA: We're right behind you.

MATT: All right. That brings us to Tyffial, who's going to go ahead and move and then run to just get up behind the mammoth and that's as much as she can do. But she is now engaged with the back of you. That brings us to Caleb.

LIAM: Uh, it's on me? Can I see where Veth is? Probably not, like, we're running away from that fire.

MATT: Yeah, you do not have darkvision. I'd say you're pretty hard pressed to see where Veth is. Maybe like cursory, like, you know you're not too far high up. I'd say you can look down and you can see her moving--

SAM: You might hear (whimpering).

MATT: -- faintly. Yeah. I'd say it's more audio.

LIAM: And I have a concentration spell on Beau.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: But I can still see our enemies right now, right?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Hey, let's throw a Fireball at them.

MATT: Sure.

LIAM: I'm being carried. I will cast Fireball at a fifth level. Shit.

SAM: Maybe we can beat them, guys. Should we stay and fight? (laughter)

MATT: Sorry, I was-- Where are you throwing it?


ASHLEY: --bad idea.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Is-- (stammering) what is Lucien doing? Lucien is staring at us?

MATT: He's turned around and he's staring in your direction.

LIAM: Taking my 60 seconds. Uh. I will.

MATT: You shooting a fireball or--?

LIAM: No, I will cast Disintegrate at Otis, who's on the ground.

MATT: Okay, all righty.

LIAM: So that is a dex save of 18.

MARISHA: Mm. Mm. Mm-hmm.

MATT: Natural 20. I'm not even joking.

TRAVIS: You've got to be--

MATT: I get some this game, too, guys!

TRAVIS: No, I know.

MATT: You can't get all the twenties.

LAURA: Does he get disadvantage because he's prone on the dex save?

LIAM: Prone on the ground?

MARISHA: Yeah, with his ankles tied up?

MATT: Prone only affects attack rolls. It doesn't affect-- or--

LIAM: Doesn't affect dex saves?

MATT: Nope.

LAURA: Well.

LIAM: Okay. Roll out of the way. There it is. I will continue to be carried by Angel Blood.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: (exhales)

MATT: Top the round is Lucien.

LIAM: (exhales)

MATT: Lucien's going to go ahead and move right there.

LAURA: He's going to be able to--

ASHLEY: (sighs)

LAURA: I can't see distance because of the--

MARISHA: Yeah, the distance is tough without a grid.

MATT: I know, it--

TRAVIS: Yeah, whatever--

LIAM: That's right on the edge.

LAURA: It's fine, it's fine.

TALIESIN: I personally feel like we should be considering-- have, like-- yeah.


TALIESIN: That's a lot of movement right there.

LIAM: (nervous grunt)

MATT: About 30 feet.

TRAVIS: And who's-- who's--

MATT: 35.

TRAVIS: Who in their party is right up on us, that's--?

MATT: That's Tyffial.

TRAVIS: Tyffial. And that's it? Is Otis real close, too?

TALIESIN: Otis is down.


TALIESIN: Oh, yeah.

MATT: You are some lucky fuckers.


MATT: If I push it right to the edge--

LIAM: Still doesn't get--

MATT: Oh, goddamn it, okay.

LAURA: (laugh-sobbing)

LIAM: Ugh.

MATT: Okay, well then. That's going to be Lucien's turn. That brings us to-- Cree's going to move over this way.

LIAM: Agh, fuck.

MATT: Cree's going to attempt to... cast Slow again.


ASHLEY: Bitch. (sighs)

SAM: She's just doing her job, guys.

ASHLEY: That's true, that's true, that's true.

MATT: Okay. Keep it in range-- If I could have--

LIAM: I just went.

MATT: I need--

TALIESIN: Reaction.

LIAM: Cue it up again.

MATT: I need the mammoth, I need the owl--

LIAM: Uh, Counterspell. I just went, so I got a new reaction queued up.

MATT: What's the range on Counterspell?

LIAM: 60.

SAM: (whispering) Oh, no. She knows where you are.

MATT: You are too far to Counterspell.

LIAM: Oh, I am over there.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: So if I can get a--

MARISHA: What do I roll for the mammoth?

MATT: Wisdom saving throw for the mammoth. Wisdom saving throw for the--

LIAM: 126.

TALIESIN: With a d4.

LIAM: Straight roll.

LAURA: With a d4.

MARISHA: Cause I am blessed, #blessed.

TRAVIS: Am I close enough? I have one more.

TALIESIN: Oh! Can you--

MATT: If you want to try it.

TALIESIN: Take a look, where are you?

TRAVIS: No, I'm going to hold it.

MATT: You're on the mammoth.

SAM: You're going to hold?

TALIESIN: Oh my god, you could--

SAM: You're going to hold it, for what? He's got more.

TALIESIN: This is--

TRAVIS: I'm going to hold it.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: What are you holding?


LAURA: 22 wisdom saving throw.

MATT: 22 wisdom saving throw? You save.

LAURA: I've got a plus ten on my wisdom, so.

MATT: No, as the owl.

LAURA: (quietly) Oh, fuck me running.

LIAM: Same roll.

LIAM: So, 12.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: With the d4?

LIAM: --plus ten.

LAURA: Yeah.


MATT: That makes you slowed.


LAURA: Yeah, that's-- nine plus three is-- 12-- 13. Yeah, that's doesn't--


MATT: Slowed. You guys are now moving at half speed.

LIAM: Who all, the entire party?

MATT: That finishes Cree's turn.

LAURA: No, just me and Beau.

MATT: The two of you, and then I actually will ask for both Caduceus and Fjord since they were also in the same cube area. Wisdom save, wisdom save.

LIAM: (quietly) Fuck.


MATT: 19 is a success.


MATT: Success. So just-- just your rides.

TALIESIN: Do I have anything to fucking--

TRAVIS: Did you say 46?

MATT: No, 26.


MATT: Caduceus.

TALIESIN: So, yeah, there's-- Lesser Restoration doesn't do shit for that, does it?

SAM: No.


SAM: It's okay, we'll still-- we'll still make it.

ASHLEY: This is a bit of a pickle. (laughter)

LIAM: (sighs)

MATT: What you got, Cad?

TALIESIN: Is it my turn?

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh, shit.

MATT: So what are you doing?

TALIESIN: I don't know, hold on. Uh, that's no good.

MATT: Then Otis, and then Jester and Fjord on deck.

LAURA: I have an easy set of actions in my plan, so.

TALIESIN: I'm going to, 'cause I don't know what else the fuck to do.

ASHLEY: Are you still an owl?

TALIESIN: I'm going to put a Guardian of Faith, right in f-- right on top of the motherfucker who's on top of us right now.

MATT: Guardian of Faith right... there?


MATT: Like whereabouts?

TALIESIN: Right in front to block that person who's currently on top of the mammoth.

MATT: To block them?

TALIESIN: Yeah, like get in their way.

MATT: They're right against it, so they need to be in an empty space. So it wouldn't be able to get between them.

TALIESIN: Sure, but it'll get-- they're in contact with it?

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: In fact, I'll say--

LAURA: That's a cool-ass==

MATT: Yeah, it's fucking rad.

TALIESIN: I'll say even 10 feet because it's got a little 10-foot radius. So I'll try and place it just at the 10-foot radius so that we can pass through and it'll, it'll get right in there. Like there'll be just,

MATT: You can do that.

TALIESIN: Yeah, is that-- like, literally between us and the rest of those bullshit motherfuckers, so they have to, you know--

SAM: (whispering) Taliesin's cursing. It must be bad.

MATT: Over here you mean?

TALIESIN: It's hard to-- yeah, like, about here, yeah.

MATT: Oh, over here you mean?

LAURA: So when we run through it, it's blocking us?

TALIESIN: Yeah, because we can walk right through without a problem, but as long as he's within the 10-foot radius.

MATT: So like here?

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah. That way he gets hit right now.

MATT: Got it, okay.

TALIESIN: So he needs to make a dexterity saving throw.

MATT: He has to be within 10 feet of it to do that?


MATT: He's not within 10 feet.

TALIESIN: Oh, I was trying to hit it so he was

LIAM: You want it to be 10 feet from him.

MATT: Sorry.


MATT: 10 feet from him would be here, to around here, this is the 10-foot radius.

TALIESIN: In the front, so that if he has to run through it.

MATT: So like up here?


MATT: Okay, got it.

TALIESIN: So dex saving throw.

MATT: That is, it's a good roll. 19.

TALIESIN: Fuck. (laughter)

LAURA: I like how we rolled so well during the dragon fight.

LIAM and MARISHA: Dragon fight.

LAURA: We used up everything during that.

TALIESIN: 10 points of radiant damage.

MATT: 10 points radiant damage, got it. All right. Oh, you roll damage for that.

ASHLEY: (squeaky hand sounds)

TALIESIN: No, it's just straight-up 10 points of radiant damage.

MATT: Oh, just straight-up. Not even rolled. 10 points, you got it. Okay, that finishes your action. You good there?

LAURA: Very nervous farts. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Sorry for my farts.

TALIESIN: I mean, I got everybody. Yeah, I mean, yeah that's what I got.

MATT: All right. Ending your turn, Otis stands up. He's going to go ahead and cast Eldritch Blast towards the mammoth. All three of them streak out and then (whooshes) vanish as they hit the anti-magic cone.


MATT: Otis gets fucking pissed and goes ahead and fires a bolt regardless at you, who created the creature. Is that, that's not concentration, right, the?


MATT: That is going to be a 20 to hit.

TALIESIN: That's my AC.

MATT: All right.


MATT: You take nine points of piercing damage and that's it, because it does pass through the zone.

TALIESIN: Whatever, all right.

MATT: All right. Cool, that finishes Otis' go. He's going to go ahead and move a little bit closer here. Try and keep pace. Jester, you're up.

LAURA: I'm going to fly away with Caduceus in my claws.

MATT: Okay, your flight speed was 60 normally?

LAURA: 60.

MATT: So it's only 30. You can double move to go 60.

LAURA: That's what I'm going to do.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: That helps, that helps.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And Caduceus is with me.

MATT: Yes, now at the end of the turn, make wisdom saving throw, please.

LAURA: Oh, well, okay.

MATT: With a d4 bonus.

LAURA: Oh, right as an owl.

MATT: Yeah. Well, d4 because of the Bless that's on you.

LAURA: Right, right, right. That is 13 plus one is 14.

MATT: 14 does not save.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's unfortunate.

MATT: Okay, Fjord.

TRAVIS: I'm going to prepare to fire an Eldritch Blast and then look into the sky and I'll point a finger up and you'll hear the flapping of giant ancient white dragon wings as the dragon has returned to seek vengeance and (heavy impact) lands with Major Image.

MARISHA: Come on.

LIAM: Yes.

TRAVIS: Right over here, outside of the magic cone.

MARISHA: Come on.

MATT: (impact)

SAM: Ooh, it's still got a little blood on it to make it look real. I like it, I like it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, maybe, maybe even a little closer to us just to sort of--

MARISHA: Push them away?

TRAVIS: Yeah. Just to maybe, maybe go, it's not worth the chase.

MATT: You've got it.

TRAVIS: And that thing bellows and roars with misty snow and sleet shooting off of it as its wings unfurl all fucking scary as hell.

MATT: Okay. It impacts. The snow bursts around it as it appears, and as it (roaring) roars into space, you can see the Tomb Takers, "Shit!" There is a definitely a visceral reaction to the unexpected arrival of this dragon in the middle of them gaining ground. That finish your turn?

TRAVIS: I will use my 30 feet to keep coming.

MATT: Well, you're on the back of the mammoth.

TRAVIS: I will not do that.

MATT: Okay. Unless you want to jump off and do it.

TRAVIS: No, I'm good.

MATT: All righty. That brings us to Zoran's turn. Zoran.

TRAVIS: We're all in it together.

MATT: Just goes ahead and decides to back off.

LAURA: Good, good, good, good, good.


MATT: Head this way. He's like, "Shit, shit, shit! Gah!" You see him wrestling with his frustration. That brings us to Yasha.


MATT: You just keep going?

LIAM: ♪ Sail. ♪


ASHLEY: ♪ Sail ♪

MATT: Distance that way. We'll get to that later.

ASHLEY: ♪ Come fly away ♪ ♪ Come fly away ♪

MARISHA: Hang on, I've got to dismiss this pop-up ad. So I can search for a mammoth. Does mammoth have anything, like--

LAURA: Hold on, let me, I will tell you what mammoth has.

LIAM: Trample. What do you want besides running?

MATT: 40-foot movement, right?

LIAM: Yeah, 40 feet you can move. Just go.

TRAVIS: It's got a poop action.

LAURA: Other than that, it's a trampling charge.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's why I was asking if there's a trample or some sort of pushback. But nah, I'll just go 80 feet.

LIAM: Yeah, it has to be in front of you.

SAM: Mammoths also have Thunderwave.

MATT: So you go 40 feet. You're slowed, so movement and action is only 40 feet. So you're like (slow footsteps). Make a another wisdom saving throw.

MARISHA: Is that slow on the mammoth or is it on Beau?

MATT: It's on Beau.

LIAM: Beau, the mammoth.

MARISHA: What am I doing?

MATT: Wisdom saving throw at the end of your turn.

LAURA: You would be able to go-- oh yeah, 40 feet fully.

MARISHA: I'd be able to go faster as Beau even as I'm-- no.

MATT: Okay, still slowed. Veth.

SAM: Oh, I mean, I'm super far ahead.

MATT: For the record, all of you guys also see this dragon land.

SAM and LAURA: (fake screaming) (laughter)

LAURA: Keep running!

LIAM: It just keeps getting worse!

MATT: Yeah, yeah, you are shitting your pants on this. Because even though it was Fjord, like without any fair warning or plan, as far as most of you know, the dragon just returned. This is the worst day.


MARISHA: Make it really convincing.

SAM: Aren't the bad guys within a hundred feet of me?

MATT: It looks like most of them.

SAM: Oh, most of them?

MATT: Most of them, yeah.

LIAM: Yeah, you've got one person like 20 feet away. 25 feet away.

MARISHA: Yeah, you've got Tyffial.

MATT: Tyffial's right there. There's Otis, there's Cree over there, who has the Slow spell on everyone else. There's Zoran. Yeah, they're all pretty much within a hundred.


LAURA: Oh, Cree's the one that did the Slow spell?

TALIESIN: Good to know.

SAM: Cree is-- is Cree within a hundred feet of, 120 feet of me?

LIAM: Within 120 feet of you, yeah.

MATT: Most likely, yeah.

SAM: Okay, I will fire a crossbow bolt at Cree. 18.

MATT: 18 hits.

SAM: Okay. There's no sneak attack, but maybe this will force a concentration hit?

MATT: Yeah, 18 just hits.

SAM: Six plus six is--

LAURA: 12.

SAM: Is 12, thank you.

MATT: 12 points of damage.

SAM: 12 points. Concentration check? Maybe? I don't know. Is Slow a concentration? I have no idea.

MARISHA: It is. I think it is.

LIAM: It is a concentration.

MATT: How many points did you do again?

SAM: 12 points.

MATT: 12 points. Rolled an 11 on the same throw, I'm not even joking. Really low roll plus bonuses, one below. You are so fucking lucky.

SAM: (cackles)

MATT: Slow drops.


SAM: Then I run. ♪ I run ♪

LIAM: ♪ So far away ♪

MATT: We're-- We're getting to a fulcrum. We'll see here who can make the rest of the way. And you would be, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: I'm-- yeah.

MATT: Okay, put you here.

MATT: All right. That brings us to Tyffial, who sees-- who's going to go ahead and try and run around this way.

TALIESIN: Still going to start at, starts his turn.

MATT: Her turn, yeah.

TALIESIN: So-- All look like tiny little balls of death right now. So that's a--

MATT: Dex save?

TALIESIN: Dex save. That's really-- they're rolling really bad at the last minute. That puts--

LAURA: Hey, so are we.

MATT: Tyffial-- yeah, fair enough-- at six.

TALIESIN: That's 20 points of radiant damage right there.

TRAVIS: Home. Just go home. You don't need to come this way.

MATT: Any other effects, or was that it?

TALIESIN: Um, uh. Yep, no, you're--

SAM: It's all because Ashley rolled an eight.

TALIESIN: That's it. (laughter) But it's a big fucking thing, so. (laughter)

MATT: Tyffial's going to, biding time in seeing Zoran and walk back, is going to go ahead and use the turn to run back this way.


MATT: All right.

SAM: We're out.

ASHLEY: Oops, my bad.


MATT: Brings it to Caleb's go.

LIAM: My go?

SAM: Turns around and runs back in.

LIAM: There's not much I can do. I am throwing a Fireball into the heart of their party. Past the dragon. I will aim it around where that mage hand is. So it gets Cree, Lucien. We will do it.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Get Otis.

MATT: As you fire the beam, you point out and go (whooshes). And the beam goes (sizzling) and just disappears.

LIAM: Beam? Fireball?

MATT: Fireball. Fireball is you point.

LIAM: Into his eyeball view?

MATT: Correct. There is a--

TALIESIN: It's not a drop from above?

LIAM: No. It's a little mote that goes (zooming).

MATT: Yeah, so you aim and the mote goes (whooshes).

LIAM: Got it.

MATT: So the mote just fizzles out in midair.

LIAM: Got it.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay. Worth it.

LIAM: Bonus action, I will continue to be a little twig boy in the arms of a barbarian woman.

MATT: You got it, okay. (chuckles) Top of this round. Lucien's going to go ahead and move forward.

ASHLEY: Is a good boy.

MATT: And as everyone's vanishing into the darkness, you can see him walk forward, looking over at the dragon, shakes his head. And goes, "Sometimes you're all a serious piece of shit, you know that?" As he glances over, you watch as the dragon (whooshes) vanishes. However, at this point they're starting to back off and you get the sense right now that you've just barely scraped by, as you all go charging into the darkness in shadow of the freezing snow in cold, exhausted, shaken, and uncertain if they're going to continue pursuit, once they've rallied. We're going to go ahead and pick up next week.

SAM: Oh.

LIAM: Got our asses handed to us.

LAURA: Yep. They have our Bag of Holding still.

MATT: I didn't mean for this to go that long. Things worked out in a way. Thank you all for hanging with us for the length of this.

SAM: Thank you, crew.

MATT: Thank you, crew for hanging with us.

MARISHA: What was that, a five and a half hour game?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: I don't know.

ASHLEY: Like our home games back in the day.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: Almost for, like, eight hours

LAURA: That was almost a six hour game.

MARISHA: It might be a record.

MATT: We'll see, with breaks and everything and it'll cut it down. But nevertheless, thank you for hanging with us. We'll see where this picks up next week. But-- get off this intense music for the ending here.

MARISHA: No, it feels comforting.

TRAVIS: I couldn't Counterspell the Slow, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to dragon.

MATT: Yeah, it was a good call.

MARISHA: It worked great. That was fucking clutch.

LAURA: They backed off because of it.

MATT: But nevertheless, thank you all for joining us. Thank you for hanging with us for this longer episode than I think any of us anticipated. We love you very much. And is it Thursday yet? Good night. (whimpering)

LAURA: Oh no.